AN: Oh, you guys wanna throttle me, I know, I know. Sorry for the long delay, but I actually started college and uh, yeah. Sort of took up a LOT of my time. Like, a lot. I'll spare you the boring details, though, and get right down to the nitty-gritty; I think you guys will really like this chapter.
Disclaimer: I do not own, blah blah blah, you saw it in my other chapters.
Warning: See other chapters.
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When one is up most of the night playing a video game, it's really easy for one to sleep in the next day.
And that is exactly what Deidara did.
Sure, his alarm went off at eight as usual, but he just turned it off in his sleep: a move he would later regret.
The living space that college guys possess always have to have a certain level of messiness to them. Like most species though, if they hope to mate, they have to have a livable area in which to move and, well, fuck. This was something Deidara had planned to thoroughly correct this day, but the delightful tunes of Hyrule field played in Deidara's head and lulled him into a far longer sleep then he'd planned.
The sun was shining in Deidara's room and into his eyes, a very bad sign, as he got the apartment with the windows facing west. Funnily enough, the sunlight wasn't what woke Deidara. No, it was his ever-loving feline companion.
See, when the light shines in just right, it's enough to send a cat of only a year's mind a flutter. Grasshopper was quite susceptible to this enchanting glimmer of light upon the sheets, so naturally the black calico assumed the crouching position. Green eyes dilated, widened and focused on their prey. His tail twitched slightly as his butt wiggled in anticipation for the kill.
Building, building, building, and…
"FUCK~!!!" Deidara screeched, finding out rather painfully that the glimmer of light that had caught his beloved little "kitten's" enchantment just happened to be directly over his crotch.
"Damn it, Grasshopper, I need that tonight!" he yelled, cupping his precious jewels, gladly realizing they were still intact.
Then it was as though a light switch had clicked in his head. The sunlight was shining into his room, which meant that the sun was in the west, which meant… Fuck.
Azure eyes swiveled over to the clock, letting out an even louder "fuck" at the bright shining numbers that read 1:07pm.
Deidara had had the day perfectly planned out, a rarity for him. Three hours for cleaning his house, five hours for grooming himself, and finally two hours for cooking an extravagant meal to catch Sasori's fancy. While some people would think five hours to be excessive for grooming, Deidara took pride in making himself as fuckable and sexy as possible. This took time, and if anyone dared to call him feminine, he would have to beat them within an inch of their life to prove his masculinity and then saunter off swaying his hips in the most feminine and seductive way he knew how. The blond was a sucker for irony like that.
Now, sadly, he only had a short amount of time to do everything.
Cleaning became something far less thorough than he'd planned. Yes, cleaning for Deidara now was simply shoving all the shit possible into his closet and lighting a few scented candles. The living room wasn't as bad, and his kitchen was always clean since he rarely cooked.
So far, so good as far as step one went.
With the pleasant sounds of music filling the small apartment space, Deidara set to work on grooming. He positioned himself in front of the mirror with tweezers in hand and for the next forty-five minutes, plucked his eyebrows into the perfect shape for his face. If he was going to be up close and personal with his sexy little redhead, he certainly didn't want to have a unibrow that went down to his eyelashes; such a thing just wouldn't do.
Letting out a breath and assessing himself in the mirror, Deidara called it acceptable and drew a bath, pouring in some vanilla scented salts to make his skin soft as the tub filled. Stripping himself of the boxers he'd been wearing all day, he slid into the tub and let out a soft groan of contentment as the warm water lapped at his achy muscles. Sadly, being crouched over a game controller half the night did leave one with rather sore muscles.
Once more he got to work on hair removal, removing the hair from his legs and under arms as well as a bit more… intimate places. In Deidara's head, he felt like smooth skin would attract someone of Sasori's type more. Just the same however, Deidara had learned from porn that hairy testicles looked like two kiwis with a sausage and the very thought of it was disgusting.
Due to the delicate nature of this process, it took Deidara an hour to finish, leaving his skin silky soft and ready for the trembling needy hands that the blond was sure to grace him later.
Draining the tub, and doing something that nature lovers would scream at, the blond flipped on a hot shower and stepped in to finish up the job with the tasks of washing his hair and body last on the water involved list for grooming. Saving water and nature had to take a side step to narcissism sometimes.
By the time Deidara was done, it was getting close to four-thirty, and making the blond anxious as to whether or not he'd have enough time to cook. Well, he and Sasori agreed to six, and knowing Sasori, he would arrive exactly at six, so he figured he'd be alright, or so he hoped anyway.
Dressing quickly and brushing out his hair, Deidara moved onto the kitchen with Grasshopper circling his legs the whole way. His feline companion couldn't resist charming Deidara when he was in the kitchen, as the calico could usually talk Deidara into feeding him some scraps.
Of course, the day was much less chaotic for Sasori.
Waking up promptly at five, the redhead ate breakfast then went running. At seven he took a shower and at eight he skimmed over the papers he'd graded previously to make sure all his marks had been accurate. At eleven, Sasori took to reading the book he'd purchased, content in the mystery unfolding through the pages.
At one, Sasori put the now finished book aside and sighed. Books weren't the same anymore, the endings always sucked and it took an act of God for a good book to be found. Just the same, the redhead began to cook himself a light lunch so he could start filling out forms to re-apply for college. As much as he loved being a high school anatomy/chemistry teacher, he wanted to do greater things with his life, and that meant going back to school for his masters degree.
By the time forms had been filled out and paid for, it was getting close to three, time to feed his beloved pet his daily dose of beetles and small grasshoppers.
Watching Hiruko eat was always a rather interesting thing to watch, as the scorpion liked to play with its prey before landing the killing blow with its lightening fast stinger.
After thirty minutes of observation, Sasori turned on the news and caught up on the day's events. By the time he was done, it was five o'clock, and time to go make dinner.
Just as Sasori went to go do that, however, it dawned on him he had to leave his beloved sanctuary to go attend to Deidara and his learning needs. Well, fuck, that's just what he wanted to do on his Sunday, but he couldn't watch a former student fail and do nothing to attempt helping.
Knowing full well that it took at least half an hour to get anywhere in this town, Sasori swatted his hair down and moved down to the parking lot, in which he got into his car and drove off to his former student's apartment.
When the knock came upon Deidara's door, the blond couldn't stop the grin from spreading across his face. He'd just gotten the spaghetti sauce done and the noodles had been done for a while, which had left him plenty of time to put on his eyeliner and freshen up.
Licking his lips, Deidara sauntered over to the door and opened it, smiling charmingly at his former teacher.
"Hey, come on in," Deidara said, stepping aside to let the smaller male in.
Sasori didn't look at all amused. In fact, he looked rather irritated. Perhaps it was the heavy scent of cologne wafting off of Deidara's body that was currently invading his brain and attempting to start a headache, or it was how eerily good the food Deidara was cooking smelled, as his faith in the other's cooking skills was non-existent. He would have to see how good it tasted.
Once more, Sasori was prepared to be thrust out of his comfort zone and into a place where he was sure he'd have to disinfect himself after leaving. To his pleasant surprise, the apartment wasn't a total wreck, nor did it reek of the smell that was college bachelor. Instead, it smelled like a mix of lavender and vanilla, something Sasori often burned in order to relax after the long toils of the day in the high school jungle.
"So how are you?" Deidara asked as he went back into the kitchen to stir the warming spaghetti sauce.
Sasori perked up at this, his eyes pulling away from the surprisingly bare living room. If he remembered right, Deidara's parents were fairly well off. This was proved by the way Deidara flashed his cash around to buy this and that with no thoughts of the students who could barely afford the school lunch. Clearly, things had changed slightly, and Sasori couldn't help but smirk that that thought. Deidara needed to experience that to appreciate the money he had and learn respect for it. However, Sasori was getting ahead of himself in his assumptions.
"I'm fine. Yourself?" he responded quietly, eyes falling upon the table, which was already set and organized. Deidara must've been trying to make some kind of impression or else he wouldn't go to such great lengths to set the table and cook dinner.
Of course, with Sasori's question about Deidara's well being, the blond couldn't contain the grin that left his lips. If he was asking about his well being then that meant that he
might be even slightly interested in Deidara's mouth engulfing his swollen—
"Deidara, if you're going to zone out on me when I've just gotten here then I should leave," Sasori said, suddenly beside him, causing the blond to startle slightly.
"No, no, no, I'm fine. It's just been a long day," Deidara assured, flashing his million dollar smile, eyes once more falling and coming back up in what Sasori didn't catch as a once over of his slender and (to Deidara) delectable body.
"Hm," Sasori hummed, looking at the food that was cooking and walking back to the table to take a seat.
As soon as dinner was served, Sasori found himself in another pleasant surprise that was Deidara's cooking. The sauce held delightful treats of tomato chunks that complimented the blend of herbs and spices Deidara had chosen to put in. Of course, what Deidara didn't tell Sasori was that in fact that was the only meal he knew how to make, as it was the only meal his mother ever had time to teach him. After an experimenting phase he subjected Hidan to and two cases of food poisoning later, he managed to get the hang of it.
Deidara noticed something about dinner that bothered him slightly, and that was the silence the two shared. If he hoped to get anywhere tonight, he'd have to be a bit more charming to the other. The important thing was getting Sasori to view him as anything but a former student. Fortunately, or perhaps not for Sasori, Deidara got off on thinking of Sasori as his former teacher, a fact he exploited in many a wet dream that sent his little college "heart" a flutter.
"So how's life been treating you? It was, what, two years before we saw each other again?" Deidara questioned, sipping on a bottle of water he had near by, his tongue none-too-subtly licking the rim of the opening, with a bit of metal catching the light and disappearing as soon as it appeared.
That flash distracted Sasori from the question for a moment, trying to think of what it had been. "It's been fine. Just doing what I did before: cycling through students and working. What's that in your mouth?" He asked without thinking, a rare slip of what was on his mind.
Deidara blinked and took another swig of water to clean any food off before sticking his tongue out and showing off the shining silver ball on his tongue. Sasori looked mildly disgusted, but Deidara could already feel his stomach muscles jumping in excitement at the fact that Sasori had been looking at his mouth. Now if he could just get Sasori a little closer to put that ring to use.
"Good, bad, what do you think?" Deidara asked, grinning.
"I think it must've hurt like fuck," Sasori said, sipping on a matching bottle of water as he pushed what was left on his plate around, finding himself relaxing a bit when it came to talking to Deidara. He never had a particular dislike for the blond, he just didn't like that he caused trouble all the time. One on one wasn't so terrible, thankfully.
The word fuck was like magic to Deidara's ears. Normally, that word was squandered and forgotten thanks to Hidan's loud and frequent usage of those words. Sasori using it, however, invoked a much different response within the blond. Teachers didn't cuss around students, former or not. For Sasori to give such an utterance meant that Deidara had all the more chance to charm his way into Sasori's pants, and step one was successful with the redhead's curse.
"That's the understatement of the century," Deidara said, pushing his bangs out of his face.
"Yes, well, I've had a few piercings done in the past and I vowed that I would never get a muscle pierced," Sasori explained, gesturing up to his ear which had three subtle piercings in it, something Deidara had never noticed.
Taking the chance, Deidara lent in closer to inspect it. He was surprised that he'd never noticed, but then again Sasori's hair was long enough that it covered his ears quite well. Oh how Deidara's mind wandered, at this newest discovery, however. He could just picture his tongue slipping out to run along the shell of Sasori's ear and let the tip run along those piercings and…
Deidara caught himself and smiled, nodding slightly while he mentally kicked himself. He was not a high school girl, and he wouldn't let these oh so wonderful fantasies distract him from the task at hand. Consequently, if he could stay focused, he could make those fantasies real.
Ever oblivious, Sasori didn't so much as notice the lust in his former student's eyes.
"So you got a girlfriend and or significant other now?" Deidara asked, smirking slightly.
Sasori snorted, spite clearly written on his face. "No," he said curtly. Clearly he didn't want to discuss something like that.
Deidara couldn't stop the image of Sasori's former girlfriend popping into his head before it quickly disappeared. Grinning, he rolled his shoulders in a simple dismissal.
"Good to know we're both having zero luck in that department," Deidara said, leaning back in his chair.
Sasori could practically see the words bull shit flashing in neon lights above Deidara's head. "Mmhm… well if you're done with dinner we should get started so I'm not back too late," he explained, picking up his plate and waiting for direction from Deidara as to what to do with it.
Those words were practically music to Deidara's needy little ears.
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"Oh, Deidara, mmm!" Sasori moaned, throwing his head back in ecstasy as he rocked back into Deidara's hips, his voice crying out in ever louder screams of pleasure.
"Fuck, I'm so close, ahh ahhh~!" Deidara called to Sasori in return, his head spinning as the sweet embrace of climax drew near. Who would've thought math tutoring would've lead them to this?
Well, no one, because that's not what was going on at all, as much as Deidara longed it to be, he was simply listening to Sasori go over the same rules he'd heard in class, on paper step by step so he would understand.
"It's easy from here, you just take the square root of seventy-eight and you've pretty much got your answer. Just don't forget to show your steps because I'm sure your professor is looking for that," Sasori explained, moving from being hunched over the coffee table to sitting back on the couch he shared with Deidara.
"I think I get it," Deidara said as he leaned over, finding himself looming over Sasori's shoulder unintentionally.
"If you think you've got it, do one on your own and I'll check it," Sasori instructed, stretching slightly as he glanced at his wrist watch. He was glad that Deidara was catching on quickly as he didn't really want to stick around for another hour.
"Right, right," Deidara said, snagging the pencil and starting to work out the problem. It didn't take him long to finish and finish it well. He was confident, and with confidence running this strong, he knew it was time to act.
"Okay, check it and see," Deidara said, sliding the paper across the coffee table and scooting closer with his arms resting on his knees so he could see how Sasori was marking it.
Glancing down at the paper, Sasori leaned down and took out his pen, looking it over with a smooth nod.
"Looks like you've got it," he said, smiling slightly. Sasori couldn't help the smile, as he was glad Deidara was finally getting it.
"Okay, one more just to be sure," Deidara said, taking the paper and starting to write out the next problem, a smirk on his lips. Sasori viewed that smirk as confidence for getting the problem. Deidara wore that smirk for a far different reason, though.
The scratching of his pencil stopped as Deidara furrowed his eyebrows, looking at the paper and glancing at Sasori. "I'm stuck. Would you show me how to get through this?" Deidara asked innocently enough.
Sasori just sighed. Well, Deidara had to do it at least thirteen times for it to get into his head officially according to human studies. Leaning down to be right beside the other, he started work on where Deidara could've gone wrong. Well, it looked like he was doing fine. He didn't quite understand what put Deidara into a corner.
"Hey," Deidara said, tilting his head down and closer.
The movement caught Sasori's attention so he turned his head and caught the blond's gaze.
It was a moment of perfection in Deidara's mind, as his plan had gone so smoothly. Sasori had his eyes connected to Deidara's own. Now, he just had to finish it and make Sasori putty in his hands.
In a swift motion Deidara swept in, his lips connecting with Sasori's own, something he'd worked unknowingly for four years to attain. It was a warm flood of thrilling nerves for the blond, his lips feeling nearly electrical as his heart jumped in his chest. Sasori wasn't pulling away, which meant that he'd finally snagged Sasori Akasuna.
AN: HANGER OF CLIFF. ILU ALL, THANKS FOR 100 REVIEWS, I'LL GIVE YOU A SWIFT UPDATE FOR THIS!!!