Is This Love
Don't Flatter Yourself
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
Warning: Femmeslash.
Thanks:
Rune Traverse: I think I have just a few more twists up my sleeve. :)
Skittles: I just like to confuse you 'because I know you hate it.
Ciao: It still has room to turn into a romantic mush… kinda.
Questioning Destiny: Why do we melt? Um… because we can't stand the heat but have too much pride to even consider getting out of the kitchen? I dunno.
Alethegoodsoul: Hm… There are hints throughout the story. If you pay attention to each of them you'll know the answer. :)
Robin Maxwell: Yay! I've been craving ice cream.
Kevin: Hermione is getting to that breaking point. Well, I guess she pretty much breaks in this chapter. I don't know. Your guys' call though. She definitely breaks in the next chapter. Hehehe.
Jaceyisonfiyah: Yep. Draco is Mr. Bad Boy and he helped to turn Hermione into such the little heartbreaker. I like twisties.
Erin: Boo you. I'm sorry if my writing has gotten shitty and repetitive hun. :[
Blazer: I like cliffies. They make people all frustrated and anticipate-y and that makes me a very happy girl.
Coin-Operated Lover: Cool name. I like that song by the Dresden Dolls. It is aweseomeness. Good lyrics, I'll consider using them.
And thank you to every one else who dropped a line. :)
000
It's so simple
And complicated the way you can crush me
No matter how much this hurts
This is through
I get as far as your door before I get caught
I make up excuses just to touch you and I can't stop,
I can't stop
So are we playing for keeps?
These days begin and they don't end for weeks
Leave me left out of anything to do with you
Excuse me while I fall apart
Don't flatter yourself sweetheart
Let me take the wheel and I'll crash this car
Do you have to make this so hard?
'Playing For Keeps' by Matchbook Romance
000
Hermione had been walking carelessly toward the lavatory when someone decided to pull her into a dark room and shove her rather harshly up against a wall. She rolled her eyes. Already knowing what was to come. "Well, hello to you too. Someone's a bit frisky today."
"What did you say to him!" She hissed out in a low, cynical tone. Her hot, menacing breath accosting the brunette's ear.
Hermione smirked. "Oh, that."
"Stop bull shitting me Hermione. What did you say to Harry!"
Her hazel eyes shimmered. She bit her lip, letting her eyes travel the length of Ginny's body. "Is that all you want Ginny?"
The girl in question felt a flutter in the pit of her stomach and nearly winced. When Hermione looked at her like that… she couldn't help herself. Was that all she wanted? To quell the guilt she'd felt when Harry's gorgeous green eyes stared into her with a bitter sadness she'd never seen before? "Don't."
"Don't what?" Somehow the brunette's hands had found their way under the fabric of Ginny's thin top.
"Look at me like that." Ginny whispered, her knees getting weak. She leaned into Hermione's caress. "Don't look at me like that."
She could feel the buzz of Hermione's voice making the hairs on the back of her neck prickle. Could feel the smirk of her soft lips against her skin. "I can't help it."
Her sapphire eyes darkened, her eyelids getting heavier by the second as Hermione's deft fingers made their way to the small of her back. Sending chills up and down her spine. Ginny couldn't remember ever feeling quite like this. Like this piece of clay to be molded. No. More like… like static. She felt like static when Hermione touched her. When the older girl looked at her.
Just when the red head felt herself giving in, all resistance weakening, Hermione froze. The prickling, soothing warmth of her skin leaving Ginny's cold and yearning. Her hazy blue eyes stared into harsh hazel. She wanted to say something, anything. Anything was all right. But the tense air beginning to surround them caused a knot to form in her throat. Caused her palms to sweat and her heart to beat its familiar, icy rhythm. Hermione's gaze seemed endless. Seemed to tear her apart.
The older woman moved away from Ginny as if burned, taking quick deliberate steps. She stood in the doorway with her back to the red head. Her form barely visible through Ginny's blurry eyes. Her heart ached. The heavy air between them was pressing down on her. Making her feel smaller and smaller. Squeezing the tears out from behind her closed eyelids and making the cold feeling in the pit of her stomach burn unbearably.
"Hermione." Her voice was hoarse, barely audible. It felt as though she were screaming. Her sore eyes met the brunettes back. The question stabbed incessantly at that lump in her throat. "Why are you so… confusing?"
She leaned against the doorframe to prevent herself from falling. Why couldn't she walk away? She was good at that. She was very good at walking away from anything, anyone she deemed threatening. Anyone but this girl.
"Please." She took a timid step closer.
Hermione could feel that familiar pain starting fireworks beneath her breast. Without turning. Without speaking those few words that would get this girl to understand. To save her from herself. To bring her back to life. The brunette simply walked away.
000
She just had to run. Running made her feel so pleasurably numb. Made the deafening thoughts playing through her aching mind dull. All that mattered was the burn. The pain. The throbbing in her calves and thighs that told her to stop. The ache in her every muscle screaming for her to have mercy. The voice in her head telling her to keep going. Keep running. Just keep running because maybe, just maybe then she could escape from that ache in her heart.
It was simple wasn't it? It was supposed to be so sodding simple. Just a matter of attraction and compatibility and…
Reflex kicked in before Ginny could do a face plant into the snow covered dirt. The cold of the snow sent tendrils of icy tingles through her body. Her forearms hit the ground with such force she grimaced and cried out in pain. "Bloody hell!"
Bringing herself to her knees, the red head pounded a fist into the ground. Tears began to form in her eyes and run down her flushed cheeks. Why couldn't she concentrate? Why did Hermione's eyes seem to haunt her? Why did she feel as though she was falling to pieces?
Nothing made sense anymore. Her head was so clouded by her body's desire, her body so ignorant of her heart, and her heart so controlling of her head. She didn't know anymore. She just didn't know.
"Ginny?"
A blurry hand came into view. Her gaze travelled up along a muscular arm, over a broad shoulder, passed chapped lips, and into eyes so striking she felt her heart skip a beat. Those gorgeous green eyes seemed to dig into her mind. Prickle her skin. Those eyes seemed to devour her and whether the chill running down her spine only to churn pitifully in the pit of her stomach was good or bad she could not decipher.
That chill, that curious feeling almost making her sick, was what lead her to place her hand in his. What led her to let him pull her from her wretched thoughts and into the security of his arms. Led her to let him wipe away her tears with his coarse but gentle fingers. To let him steal a bruising kiss from her trembling lips. To let his hands explore her body, his lips crush her, and his lust consume her.
000
"'Mione?" Ron placed his hand in hers. Comfort for the both of them. "Are you sure about it? I mean… it might still-"
The sharpness of her eyes staring into his cut his plea short. "It hasn't been."
He nodded. He understood. There was nothing more he could do but be there. "Does Fleur know?"
Hermione stopped in her tracks and looked up at the morning sky. A storm was coming. She took a deep breath. What had compelled her to tell Ron? What was it that urged her to show even the smallest ounce of weakness? Had the ice covering her nearly useless heart thawed?
The brunette shook her head. It was a cold day. She knew Ginny was out and about somewhere near. The way Ginny's blue eyes tore into her as she announced to everyone that she was going for a morning jog. Mrs. Weasley hadn't been too happy about her daughter skipping out on breakfast but everyone, especially Hermione, could feel the hot tension in Ginny's words. The venom in her voice and bitterness of her gaze.
"It's no business of Fleur's."
His brows furrowed. He took a deep, calming breath before asking Hermione the one question that had been pestering his mind since the brunette decided to tell him. "…What about Ginny?"
The echo of his words penetrated her mind. Hermione glared hard into the snow before beginning to walk again. Why should Ginny know a thing about it? So that she could feel sorry for Hermione?
No. The hazel eyed woman blinked that moisture from her eyes. She wouldn't let anyone pity her. She didn't need their pity. And she sure as hell didn't need help from anyone. Not Ginny. Not Fleur. Not her father. Not even Ron.
Hermione jerked her hand away from Ron's. She recoiled from him as if burned. Burned by that name and by all the implications in his words. She grabbed her coat, headed for the door. She did what she knew. She ran away from it all. From the insinuations. From the tears begging to be released. She ran from every syllable of that name. The one that made her heart feel alive. From the tremble in her voice. "I'll be back before sundown."
"Hermione." She felt the heavy warmth of his hand stop her. She needed to move. She needed to get away. Ron did the only thing he could. He turned her around, wrapped his arms around her, and whispered comfort into the sweet smell of her hair. "Be careful."
He let her go.
"Ginny?"
Hermione's skin prickled. Her head turning sharply toward the sound of that voice. Her feet carried her closer. Her hands making an opening through the thick branches of a low hanging tree. Her hazel eyes darkening viciously as they took in the scene. She glared at them. Her heart aching so pitifully. Her mind coming up with useless excuses. Her body burning with rage.
How could Ginny do this to her? A voice pleaded weakly. Because, said her cherished voice of reason, she's just like all of the others. It was stupid of her to think differently, Hermione admonished herself. It was foolish to fall in…
Love?
The brunette's head was so clouded, that ache in her heart so painful, that her actions felt like a haze of blurred events. For a moment she stared in awe at her balled fist and then at Harry's bloodied nose before she realized what'd just happened.
"Hermione I…"
Her eyes connected with deep, puzzling blue. Hermione pressed a hand to her cheek. She looked down at the salty wetness against her icy fingers in horrified confusion. Was she crying? Her heartbreaking hazel eyes met Ginny's once more and then... she ran away.
000
Author's Note:
It's been a very long time since I've updated or written a thing. I only have one excuse and I don't think it's a very valid one. I fell in love. And then I went and got my heart all broken and stuff so… there ya go.
-Emokid-
(The dork that stole your heart and ripped it to pretty little shreds)