Wandering Soul
Chapter 3: Shell Shock / Adjustment
By: Lord Legato Deathscythe
Disclaimer: See prologue
As Shinji rested in the hospital room, his mind trying desperately to calm down from the shock, Asuka, Rei, and Misato spoke of the young boy that had disappeared so long ago. They had several questions on their minds, questions with no easy answers. The world had changed, and apparently Shinji had not. More questions with no answers.
While the office had been cold to anyone entering it during the time of Commander Ikari, Misato had done all she could to make the commander's office her own. The first change had been the lighting. Misato had more put in to make the office less cavernous. A fresh coat of paint and some plants scattered across the office toned down the darkness Gendo Ikari had constantly had around him. It also prevented conferences with subordinates from being excessively strained.
But no amount of atmosphere could possibly relieve the tension felt within those walls this day.
Misato sipped at her coffee while Asuka and Rei sat on the other side of the desk from her. Even after the war, NERV and Eva had consumed so much of their lives that she could almost see herself and Ritsuko sitting before her. Before Hell had come knocking at their door.
"So, what do we know, Rei?" asked the commander.
"From what I can tell he is Ikari, however I will have to run a genetic analysis to be certain. If he is a clone, then I may not be able to tell. It will depend on how well the genes were grown."
"How can you say that he's a clone, Wondergirl? He looks exactly like he did back in 2015!" came the irritated voice of Asuka Langley Soryu.
"That he has not aged at all is one reason why I believe he may not be the Ikari we remember. It is physically impossible for him to have remained the same while time has progressed. I will need to run several scans of the area Ikari disappeared in, as well as go over the scans from ten years ago. There maybe something within the old records of the Magi that was missed the first time. It is also possible that our current sensor arrays picked up something that the older ones from 2015 did not. The last upgrade improved the sensitivity of the sensory equipment by approximately thirty-five percent. I will have to check to be sure. Also there is one other possibility, however, I do not feel it wise to consider until I have all the data available."
"What do you suggest we do now Rei?" asked Commander Katsuragi.
"We need to keep him isolated and in NERV custody until I have satisfactorily identified him. We can not take the chance that this Ikari is a rouse to attack us from within. And the fact is if that is the case then there maybe only one truly definitive way to find out," Rei said.
"You're talking about an activation test with Unit One," Misato said.
"Yes, it would be the most definitive way to verify it is Ikari. I need not remind you how temperamental she got when he disappeared. Only one other person has ever been able to activate her and we all know why that was. He should awaken shortly; he simply went into shock due to the situation. I must go now, I need to enter the data into the Magi." With that, Rei departed for Central Dogma.
An uncomfortable silence settled on the two remaining women. A silence that left both to thoughts best left to them alone. Misato was the one to break this silence, "How are you holding up?"
"About as well as you are I guess," Asuka said.
"Yeah, I'll be surprised if either of us is able to sleep the night until this is settled. I'll put the Fifth Child on watch for now. I'd rather have you be the one handling most of our affairs regarding this Shinji. Before you say anything about me doubting this, fact of the matter is it's just too good to be true. Honestly, I had hoped that after all this time he would have found some peace," Misato said.
Asuka left the room as she responded, "Peace and NERV never go together."
--
Asuka watched Shinji as he lay on the bed, a peaceful look on his face, a peace that would be torn from him upon his awakening into this strange new world. It had been bad enough for him when he came to Tokyo-3 the first time, to be pressed into service by his father. Asuka knew that had been a great weight on his soul. If she had been able to see beyond her own problems at the time she might have noticed it... might have been able to sort out her feelings instead of fighting her own heart.
The old saying had proven true. She was her own worst enemy.
But it was also said that hindsight was twenty/twenty for a reason. No matter what you did in the present, thinking back you could always think of another way you could have or should have acted.
Or how one choice could have saved you so much heart ache.
Asuka had many things that, as she looked back, she could or should have done. But the past was the past, and there was no way of changing that. All anyone could do was learn and move on. She had learned a lot, and moved on to each new lesson life had given her.
But now, it seemed as if fate had decided to give her a retest. A chance to mend or try something she hadn't before. But there was one big problem standing in her way.
Shinji was still fourteen, his body still that of the child he had been ten years ago. She had had the chance to grow, to mature. He had been denied that. No matter what Rei said about him being a clone or a security risk, Asuka knew in her heart and soul that it was the same Shinji Ikari she had known. And of course, there was only one real way to test that.
Rei, of course, was the most knowledgeable when it came to genetic manipulation. Asuka knew this and why it was so. Shinji would never be able to handle that revelation if they ever told him. It had only been in an act of spite that Ritsuko had shown Asuka and Misato the secrets. A vain attempt at revenge against Commander Ikari. So many things had happened...
There wasn't much left to do but find a way to let him know everything was alright, even if she didn't quiet believe it would be herself.
--
In Shinji's mind, the turmoil of the situation overwhelmed him.
He kept seeing Asuka as he knew her, then the woman who claimed to be Asuka standing next to her. Then Rei and the woman who was also Rei would stand next to them. Same with Misato, all of them encircled him. He didn't know which was real and which wasn't.
"They are all real," came the voice of a young child behind Shinji. It was a child Shinji knew, for that child was him.
"But, how can that be? I was only walking for an hour to get back home. How could they have changed so much in so short a time span? It doesn't make sense."
"I know only what you do, but it is the only idea that makes sense."
"Asuka couldn't have aged ten years in an hour though. It's not possible. Everything I know says it can't happen."
"But you are wrong, obviously. Perhaps it's not them who the problem is with."
"What do you mean? I can't have stayed the same for ten years, even if I were to fall into a coma. My body would still change over time."
"Again I don't know. All I know is that it has happened. So what will you do now?" Shinji's childlike self asked.
Shinji thought about that. Usually if he knew he was running from something, he could identify it, see his problem with the help of this ethereal self and choose a course of action.
But this was much different.
"I can't run, there's nowhere to run to. Everything I knew is gone. I…"
"You want to run, to hide from this. While at any other time I would tell you that was wrong, I cannot fault you this time. But I think we both need to know more before we choose our path. You can't run from a specter, they are everywhere. We need to know what happened in order to tell what the truth is."
Shinji thought of this, and knew it was right. After all, there was no truth here yet only opinions and questions. What he needed were answers and facts. What he needed was to know what happened.
Deep inside however, he hoped this was false. While he didn't like piloting an Evangelion, it was better than being thrown so far out of touch that he couldn't tell what was what. He also needed to know who he could trust here, and if they would be able to help him.
Asuka so far was the only one he'd really become somewhere near reacquainted with. Could he trust her?
He had no one else he could trust.
With that in mind, Shinji left the dreamscape and returned to the conundrum that was calling itself the real world for now.
--
Shinji slowly opened his eyes, to gaze upon the hospital ceiling. Even this one thing that had unfavorably been familiar was now alien to him. The good news was that the doctors had left him with his own clothes instead of putting him in a hospital gown. One thing he noticed was his right hand wasn't at his side where he expected it. It was warm, with a gentle grip holding it.
Shinji looked over to find Asuka asleep in the chair next to him, holding his hand.
This was also an off thing, Asuka would never have stayed with him, let alone hold his hand through the night. So many things had changed in what felt like so short a time.
At least this was a pleasant sort of change. A change for what he hoped was the better, even if it meant dealing with so many different things. It was a simple thing really, but the simple things were often the best things. The things that made you remember you were human, that you weren't alone or lost in the world.
Shinji smiled lightly and squeezed Asuka's hand, taking it in a gentle grip of his own.
Asuka stirred at that, slowly opening her eyes and looking into the dark blue of Shinji's. She smiled at him, and squeezed his hand back.
"Morning, I hope you slept well," Asuka said, her voice still heavy with sleep itself.
Shinji just sat there in bed watching Asuka as she stretched out from sleeping in the chair all night.
"I slept alright, but I had some nightmares," Shinji answered.
"I can see why honestly. I don't think I'd be able to sleep the first night without some of my own if our roles were reversed. Of course, compared to some of the nightmares I've had before these would be pleasant dreams I think. Do you want to talk about it?"
"I don't even know where to start, everything is so different now. I can't even begin to understand it all."
Shinji looked down at his hands, noticing his right hand was now much colder then before. His eyes became more withdrawn as the gravity of his situation came down upon him. Asuka noticed this but didn't know what to do.
Letting Shinji know where the situation stood was top priority on her list though.
"Well, before you start worrying about anything, there are some things we need to take care of. Rei is still trying to solidly identify you. Since you're still fourteen she isn't entirely convinced you're Shinji Ikari. She's running some tests to identify you, but even then I don't know how convinced she'll be. As soon as Rei is finished with her initial tests I'm certain she'll want you to come back for more. Then of course she might also want to do some sync tests and an activation test with Unit-01."
"Are we still being attacked by the Angels? Even after ten years?"
"No, after you left everything just stopped it seemed. We ended up getting Unit Three after Unit Four and the Second Branch were lost to a Sea of Dirac. Suzahara was selected as the Fourth. He's done pretty good everything concidered. He and Hikari just need to stop acting out the best of the Olympic Gymnastics team and get hitched."
Shinji's only reply was, "Huh?"
"You know how I went on about you being a pervert and all that? Same with Aida and Suzahara?"
Shinji nodded.
"I was right about Touji, I just never thought Hikari would be able to match him pervert to pervert," Asuka said. Shinji began blushing at that all sorts of embarrassed.
That didn't last though as it sunk in, one of his best friends had been pulled into this mess. He didn't know what was going on though. He wanted to blame himself for not being there, but it was hard since everything for him was just such a short period of time. He didn't know what to think, or what to do. He gaspaed though when Asuka suddenly sat down next to him and pulled the small boy into her arms.
"I know you're blaming yourself for all of that, but I want you to know it's not your fault. Whatever happened you couldn't control and I don't blame you for it. I'm just hoping we can find out what it was that did this to you. If we can figure that out we can put this behind us and move on."
Shinji slowly wrapped his arms around Asuka's waist, holding on to her like an anchor in a storm. They stayed like that for a while, just holding on.
This was going to be a long road for everyone, longest for Shinji.
Asuka broke the silence, "I just want you to know, no matter what happens I will stay with you through all of this. I'm not going to let you face it alone."
They said nothing else, just sat there holding each other as silent tears began to run down both their cheeks.
To Be Continued
Authors notes: Well, More setting up in this chapter. Very little development but this is more for the sake of getting into the mindset of Asuka. How she's matured over ten years and all that sort of stuff. She isn't exactly the same as she was in the series, but she's not totally different either. Same with Rei, they got through everything from the series and tried to improve on their strengths. I'll be going more in depth with them in later chapters as Rei tries to solve this puzzle and Misato deals with her surrogate son returning. Also, we might have a few visitations from some unlikely yet dangerous characters.
Thanks to the pre-readers, for they are swift to correct errors. Especially these guys: TommyRude, Ken Sohryu, Alnilam, Random1377, Isamu, Angel17, and all my others.
As always, individual C&C is welcome, neigh DEMANDED, at and will be greatly appreciated. Also, if you got some ideas on where this should go drop them to me. They may just go in.
Look for My part 4 sometime when I finish it, and Ryan T. Nelson and Zero Yuy's next parts when I can beat them… I mean inspire them to work on more