AN: YOUR REVIEWS ARE GREAT SO KEEP THEM COMING AND I'LL UPDATE. I LOVE THE CHANGE IN CHARATER FOR RORY, JUST WAIT TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS. I DON'T OWN GILMORE GIRLS....

Ch 3

"Can we talk" I hear Logan say coming outside to the bench I was sitting on. I needed air, it didn't matter that it's like 20 out and I barely have anything on my shoulders. The cold helps numb the feeling of depression and lost. I still can't believe I bluntly told them about the miscarriage. What was I thinking? Now Finn will be nicer to me because of it and I don't want that.

"I'm done talking to you. I'm done hearing you complain about things that you can control. I was done with you the day I left the hospital and I promised that I would never let you make me feel inferior and that much hurt again. So if that's what you're planning or thinking that you can make this big speech to make everything okay, than you're seriously mistaken Logan" I state not looking at him. I know I'm harsh but I don't care. He deserves it.

"I'm sorry that it happened, Ace. I really don't know what to say to make you feel better or if you even want that. But I need you to know that I would have been there no matter what went on at graduation, even if it was just holding your hand in the hospital. You shouldn't have gone through that alone. I should have been there" he says sitting next to me.

"I couldn't face you, or mom or anyone. Don't you get that? I was failing at something that millions of women do every day and I couldn't do it. It was my fault no one else's, can't you see that? How could I look at you and tell you that I lost our baby after I lost you? I couldn't think about you without crying for hours, I just…I couldn't handle any more pain. Hell, my mom doesn't even know Logan. She was so happy with Luke after everything, how could I? She's my best friend and I couldn't tell her. I did what I had to do and handled it. It's nobody's burden but mine" I cry slightly and look up at him. I know he can tell that this is hard for me. He closes his eyes and look away. I used to love this man so much and now I can barely look at him. Maybe it hurts him too.

"But Ace, someone should have been there for you; none of it was your fault. Things like that happen, all the time. I would have shared it with you. I would have been there" he states touching my hand and I pull away.

"An old friend was there. Someone that became my confidant on the campaign, I wasn't alone" I say thinking of how great Tristan was. If it wasn't for him taking me in that second night in Iowa, I could have had more complications than I did. Tristan turned into the rebound guy, but we knew that it was nothing more than that. Just sex when we needed it, just someone to feel close to when needed it. True, many thought we were dating, but we argued too much for that to happen.

"But it should have been me. It was our child, not just yours. Do you any idea what I'm feeling right now? Knowing that the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with was pregnant with my child and lost it. I can barely wrap my mind around it" he states like he had a right to be there. I did regret not telling him and when I finding had the nerve and we were in California for the election, I couldn't do it. It was a month later that I received the wedding invitation and told myself that I did the right thing. That he was happy.

"It's in the past now, Logan and I want to move on. I need to move on. You have a life, how long was it after going to California, did you meet her? She's what 6 months? So that means less than a year before you moved on" I state harshly and he smirks at me.

"With my best friend, you can have any guy and you chose Finn" he says not believing it, but not answering my question.

"I don't know maybe, but it shouldn't matter to you. Last night was the first time in months that I felt free. That I felt some part of me waking up again, I want that more than anything. That feeling of being yourself, being who you were supposed to be all along, don't I deserve that? I don't know what is going on between Finn and me, but you can't stand in the way anymore. You moved on, whether you wanted to or not. You have a baby coming Logan. That should be your priority not fighting with your best friend, especially over an ex-girlfriend" I say. There's a long silence when he's just looking up at the stars and it's so clear out.

"It's not mine" he says looking down finally and into my eyes. I just stare at him. What is he saying? He looks hurt, almost angry at the fact. "Well that's not entirely true, I actually don't know if it's mine or not. Keira cheated on me with her ex-boyfriend and now we have to wait to see if it's a Huntzberger or not. She refused to get tested while pregnant, so we have to wait for the paternity test until it's here. I hated her for it, still do and I don't understand how you ever forgave me for it, when every time she's near, I feel betrayed. I feel disgusted when she tries to touch me, and I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like that" he says looking broken up over it.

"Like you said then we weren't together when you slept with all those bridesmaids. It still hurt and I hated that I wasn't enough for you to wait for, but people make their choices. My love for you blinded me, I wanted to be enough, I wanted for once to be exact what someone wanted and not some regret or mistake. At the time, we think that what we're doing is right and looking back there are so many things I would change, but I don't have time machine so all I can do is move forward" I say standing up wanting to go back and find Finn. He grabs my wrist and I stop. He stands up and turns me to him.

"Last night, when you were with Finn, did you…" he starts not really looking at me and you can see that it hard for him to even ask. I find it poetic justice.

"Yes, but that shouldn't matter to you and it's none of your business" I state knowing where he was going.

"Was he…" he continues. The pain is in his face that I slept with his best friend.

"He was sweet and didn't push Logan. It was a mutual decision and no, Finn's not the rebound guy, I wouldn't do that to either of us or to your friendship, but I wasn't the one that just punched him" I say smirking at him and he chuckles.

"He's always liked you Ace. Even in Yale, he used to tell me that I wasn't good enough for you. That you deserved someone that could fit into both of your worlds and I wasn't that guy. I tried, I tried more than you know, but I wasn't. I never realized he was talking about himself. Colin told me last night after I figures out that you left with him, that he hated me when we fought and knew you deserved better. Just…give him a chance to see you. To see the Rory that you allowed me to see privately. The one who's more like Lorelai than you want people to know, I think you both might be surprised at what you see" he states kissing my cheek and we hear someone clear their throat.

"Everything alright here" Finn questions us coming out with ice pack on his face.

"Oh my god, Are you okay" I question leaving Logan standing there and going to Finn. He moves the ice pack and I see that it's all swollen.

"It's not broken love, Seth's brother Steven checked it" he says and I nod. Steven is an ER doctor in NY. He reminds me of Paris, in boy version that is.

"Man, I'm sorry, I don't know what got into me" Logan says apologizing.

"Jealous, enviously, spiteful, rage filled, irritation, angry" I offer and he smirks at me.

"Thanks Ace, walking thesaurus I tell you" he laughs.

"It's okay mate, I was expecting something to happen, but not like this or here mate. I don't think he will ever forgive us" Finn laughs. They were just fighting and now they're joking with one another. I will never understand boys.

"I'm going inside to handle Colin, you two need to talk" Logan nods before whispering something to Finn and walking away.

"Hi" I say taking Finn's hand.

"Hey love, you okay" he questions and I smile.

"We don't have to talk love, we did a lot of that this morning, and do you want to get out of here" he questions and I nod.

"Come on Finny; let's go back to my place. I have this nurse's outfit I'm just dying to try out" I smirk pulling him around the hotel to the limo.

"Bloody hell, I think I'm going faint, I'm going to need personal undivided attention Nurse Rory" he says dramatically lean down on me.

"Exactly what I was thinking Finn. Hopefully you'll be a good patient or I might have to tie to down to the bed" I state opening the door to the limo and crawling in. Within seconds, I'm showing him exactly how much undivided attention I meant. Pushing my dress up so I can straddle him and he groans excitedly when he feels the nonexistent panties and I smirk.

"Making my job too easy love" he smirks before kissing me passionately. It's like everything that was recently discovered meant nothing to the chemistry we have for one another. I like that; it was a fear that means nothing now.