Shinobi News Live at Five

-The Opening Screen and Music shows up. Naruto is sitting at the desk with a pile of papers, looking confused-

Sakura: psssst. Naruto YOU'RE ON.

Naruto: uhhh. Sorry... I just went through what may or may not have been a vile swarm of puff balls and brushes.

Sakura:...

Naruto: They did my makeup today, which kind of freaked me out.

Sakura:...

Naruto: Anyway, Tonight's top stories are:

Do giant kunais have total advantage over regular ones?

Is the night sky a dark dark blue, or is it black?

Why did Hayate look like he was high?

All this and more on tonights edition of Shinobi News Live at Five.

Sakura: Hayate was sick.

Naruto: yeah but he looked high.

Sakura: Dude that's so wrong the dude's dead.

Naruto: I know. once again, i'm not the one who writes this stuff.

Sakura: Who does?

Naruto: Itachi.

Sakura: WTF How did a S-Class kill on site missing nin get a job in our nightly news?

Naruto: With a great resume.

Sakura: ... (--)

Naruto: Anyway, Neji's fangirls got him last night, so Kakashi stands in for today's fangirl report.

Sakura: Geeze Naruto you should so concerned.

-The Fangirl Report Screen shows up along with horror movie music-

Kakashi:... Don't bother Sakura. Anyway, No fangirls will be on the move today, due to the fact that two days from now is the great Fangirl Festival that happens yearly. The fangirls will gather in the city of the authoresses and partake in videos of whatever it is they're fangirls of, pictures, stories and more. They also try to use their powers of persusasion to convert other authoresses from nonfangirls to fangirls. This can mean BIG trouble for those of us who have fanclubs. Except Choji.

Choji: Hey.

Kakashi: Anyway, So, anyone who has a fanclub can relax for a week and a half ,because the festival lasts for 5 days, and it takes them a while to travel. Back to you Naruto.

-The screen returns to Naruto-

Naruto: Thank goodness.

Sakura:... OMG. THE FESTIVAL -runs-

Naruto: Oo?

Kakashi: She's still a sasufangirl.

Naruto: ahhhhhh... Wait. then who will do fashion?

Kakashi: Idk. Most girls are gone.

Temari:... I think I'm lost.

Naruto: Hey. a girl.

Temari:...good for you Naruto. and you are a...

Kakashi: no, we need a girl to do the fashion.

Temari: ... oh, so, because I'm a girl, I know about fashion?

Kakashi & Naruto: uhhhhhhhh...

Temari:... give me 5 bucks.

Naruto: -hands Temari 5 bucks-

Temari: coool. -goes to the fashion desk-

Naruto: Now to Temari with Fashion.

-The Fashion Screen appears-

Temari: Coool. Sakura has like, a giant wall of clothes, and shoes, and make up, and purses, and all sorts of lovely things... Okay. I don't know about Konoha fashion, but I do know about general fashion. First of all, what's in now, is like, so wide collars. If your collar is twice the circumference of your head, then it's awesome. Okay? It works for everyone. So, if you can't decide what to wear, you should so wear a wide collar.

I guess it's back to Naruto?

- The Screen Returns to Naruto-

Naruto:... Sooo.