Blake's POV

Hello Eli, how are you today? Hooked onto all these tubes and machines, the machines breathing for you, the heart monitor's beeping the only sign of life from you. Oh, not good? Me neither. I feel very strange here without you, school is over. That's good. I get to be by your side day by day. No one tells me to leave, they know I'm never gonna leave you…not until you wake up.

Kimi's bigger now, almost seven months. Her twins are due soon, she's tired all day long, Jake has to rub her feet to lower her ankle's swelling. He doesn't mind, though. He's becoming a very good daddy. You'd make fun of him because of how whipped he's become.

Your hands are soft and warm, and I stroke them all day, but you never squeeze back or anything, and it hurts me inside. I can't see your beautiful eyes, the life and spirit in them. Mine are dead, or so Jake tells me.

I've been writing letters to you, pretending your not here and you're simply somewhere you'd much rather be, Japan, Ireland, England, whatever. Want to hear one? They're really rather corny.

To my beloved Eli,

How are you doing? I miss you so much, love, it's driving me crazy. I just want to meet you at the airport and have us run to each other like in those love stories. Can we do that? It would make me very happy, my dear.

School's over. You lucky bastard, you didn't have to go to school for the last couple weeks. I envy you, you know? ^_^

Jake's becoming Kimi's slave, did I tell you? I'm pretty sure I did. But it's still funny every time I repeat myself. You're such a sweetie. I dream about you every night, and I dream that you're telling me you love me and you and I do the dirty. ^_^ Hee, sorry I'm being so pervy. It's just our absence is causing me to…not be able to release…^_^

Ohh, your dad isn't much fun without you here. He never really was, but I think without you, I have no defense. Help me.

Okay, love, I'm gonna stop writing before I cry. ^_^ My emotions are as unpredictable as Kimi's these days.

Miss you.

Your one and only,

Blake.

It's not very good, is it? I try and pretend you're not where you are. It sometimes works, but mostly, it doesn't.

Your mom has stopped trying to persuade me to come home and get some sleep, but I refuse to leave you. I sleep on the cot, instead, barely any sleep at that. I hold your hand day and night.

They tell me I have to drink and eat to survive, but I drink a little and eat even less. I don't need food to live, I need you, Eli.

Won't you wake up? It's been a month since the…the…the…accident. How could you take that bullet for me? I didn't deserve to be saved. If Adam wanted to kill me, then I should've shoved you aside. But no, I let you pretty much die for me.

How can I forgive myself for letting this happen? I can't. I slice my wrist open every day, watching the blood trickle down. Blood for blood. I'll keep doing this until I reach the same amount of blood loss as you, it's only fair.

I'll never stop hoping, believing, that you'll be okay, until our hearts stop beating.