Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Thanks for the reviews guys!!!
For all of those who are wondering when the Meredith/Derek love story is coming up it will be very soon in the next couple of chapters or so.
So please keep those reviews coming!!
After having finishing her coffee with Mark, Meredith went over to the hospital child care to check on her son. Meredith stood at the window of the childcare and watched Lachlan play with the other children. She smiled wishing that everything in her life was that simple. That it didn't matter that another kid had taken your away your building block, as you knew you could find something more interesting, or more fun to play with.
"What time do you get off?"
Meredith turned around to see Alex standing behind her with a patient's chart. "Hi Alex," Meredith smiled and turned back around to look at Lachlan playing with the other children. "I don't get off until 7pm."
Alex closed the chart and walked over to stand next to Meredith. "I get off at 5, do you want me to pick him up and take him home and feed him and put him to bed."
Meredith smiled again; it was nice to see that Alex was so supportive. Ever since he started seeing Izzy again he was around the house and helping out a lot. "Thanks Alex, I will be going over to Mark's to have dinner." She left out the part that she was also having dinner with Derek as she knew that he would tell Izzy and then it would get to Christina who would go on one of her rants.
"No worries," Alex patted her on the back and walk way to go deal with his patient.
The rest of the Day Meredith was in the clinic and checking up on her patient Mr Soy who was now in his room. Once the clock clicked over to 7pm Meredith was eager to go, but she wasn't eager to see Derek, knowing the night will be strained with the conversation of knowing where he stood.
Meredith went to the change rooms and put on her ordinary clothes and let Izzy know that she was going to Mark's and that she probably would be home late.
Meredith waited in the hospital lobby and checked her watch wondering where Mark was.
"Hey beautiful."
Meredith turned around to see Mark standing behind her in his leather jacket, a grey shirt and a pair of jeans. "Hey." Meredith slid her hands under his jacket and hugged him.
"You ready to go?" He asked hugging her back.
"Yeah sure am, let's get this over and done with." Meredith moved away from him and took his hand as they walked out the door and to his car.
Mark hit the button for his central locking and went for his door. "Derek said that he would be about half an hour late as he had a surgery to go to, but that will give us a chance to organise dinner."
Meredith rolled her eyes and got into the car.
Mark also followed laughing at her.
Once getting to Mark's he pulled out a bottle Chateau Lafite red wine and crocked it.
"So what is for dinner chief?" Meredith asked as she handed the glass to Mark so he could pour the wine.
"Umm." Mark looked around him, as if he was searching for something. "Well not sure. I can't actually remember the last time I even shopped," he said laughing.
Meredith giggled, and got up to go to the front door when she heard a knock. As she answered the door the smile disappeared from her face.
"Hello Meredith," Derek said as he chocked on his words.
"Mark's in the kitchen," Meredith said moving aside to let him in.
Derek walked into the house and Meredith closed the door behind him.
"Mere I managed – "Mark cut himself off as he saw Derek. "Ahh Derek your here early."
"My surgery finished sooner then I anticipated." Derek looked from Mark to Meredith, where there eyes met.
Meredith turned away from Derek and looked to Mark. "You were saying something."
Mark smiled. "Yeah I managed to find something that wasn't mouldy or past it's used by date."
Meredith smiled and wondered if he was talking about a take out menu.
"Derek did you want a drink?" Mark asked, wanting to get them more into the house and away from the front door.
"Sure," Derek breathed, feeling really awkward about this whole situation.
Mark began to walk to the kitchen when he stopped and looked towards Meredith who was still standing by the door. "You alright Mere?"
Meredith smiled. "Yeah, I am just going to call home and see how Lachlan is going."
Mark walked over to Meredith and kissed her on her forehead. "Say hello for me."
Meredith watched Mark and Derek walk into the kitchen and she went to the lounge room to call Alex.
"So I hope pasta is ok, because that is all I can seem to find in my cupboards," Mark said pouring a glass of wine for Derek and handing it to him.
Derek took the glass from Mark then swallowed about half the glass. He knew he couldn't continue seeing Mark and Meredith together tonight, without being a bit liquored up. "Yeah pasta's fine," Derek said puffing a little and turned to hear Meredith coming towards them.
"Ok Alex put him on I am getting Mark now." Meredith took the phone away from her ear and handed it towards Mark. "He wants you."
"Ok," Mark slightly smiled. "While I'm talking to him can you cut some tomatoes?"
Meredith nodded and took some tomatoes out of the fridge and picked a knife up from the knife block.
"Hey buddy," Mark said with a smile. "No mummy and I are having dinner with a friend."
Derek's heart sank. He realised that Mark was talking to Lachlan…his son. Derek swallowed the rest of his wine, and then poured himself another glass which he also downed. This was already starting to be too much for him. Once again Mark had taken everything in his life away from him while he was not watching. He had done that with Addison when he got wrapped up in his work, and once again he focused on work and he lost everything.
Mark closed Meredith's flip phone and placed it on the bench. "He's ok now, Alex said that he will try and put him asleep again." Mark slid his hands around Meredith's waist and started kissing her neck, then looked up to Derek who was standing on the other side of the bench. "Did you want another Derek?"
Derek looked down to his glass and then back up to Meredith who had stopped cutting and was looking at him with a slightly confused look. "No. No I can't do this." Derek turned and left the room.
Both Mark and Meredith looked at each other.
Sighing Meredith put her knife down and moved Mark's hands away from her. "I will go."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah we came here to talk so I might as well talk to him." Meredith walked out of the kitchen and to the lounge room where she could here something. "You better slow down on the hooch."
Derek turned around with his glass of scotch and went and sat on the lounge, taking the bottle with him. "Well I must be drunk if I am seeing Mark and you together." Derek took a mouthful of his rather large glass of scotch.
"Hey." Meredith moved into the lounge room with her arms crossed. "He was there when you weren't."
"Yes he seems to have that effect on all the women I have been with," he said then followed by drinking the rest of his scotch and poured himself another.
Meredith dismissed the comment that Derek just spoke shaking her head and took a seat on the lounge opposite him, so that she wouldn't start pacing. She knew Mark had changed and for the better. "You will always think the worst of people Derek, you always have."
"Well it is hard to see any good in people when they always do the worst to you." Derek placed his glass on the glass table in front of him.
"And me?" Meredith asked as she looked at him. "And your son? What did we do to deserve this?"
Derek looked up to her sadden eyes. "Meredith you were the one that said it was over remember? You said it was so over, I knew that you wanted nothing more to do to me, I told you that I loved you and you were the one that left me. Maybe not physically but emotionally you weren't ready for us."
"And do you think that I was ready to have a child?" Meredith stood and started pacing. "Derek I might not have been ready to take the next step in our relationship, but when I found out that I was pregnant all I wanted was you. You by my side to tell me that everything was going to be ok; that we would get through this." Meredith stopped and looked at him. "But where were you?" Meredith walked over to a photo of Mark, Lachlan and her and didn't wait for Derek to answer. "But then Mark came into our lives, he stopped me from falling, he turned into the person that I need, that we needed."
Derek stood and walked over to her. "I am sorry that I left you, I am sorry that I didn't answer your calls."
Meredith turned away from the photo and looked at Derek who was standing next to her.
"But Meredith I was trying to move on. You need to understand that, I wasn't going to stay when you didn't want anything to do with me. I wouldn't be able to bare to watch you move on without me, I can't stand it now watching you and Mark." Derek walked away from her and picked up his scotch glass, taking a mouthful and he put it back down on the table. "What did you want me to do when I left, to write postcards," Derek tried to keep his voice at a normal tone, to wanting to raise it.
"What I expected you to do was answer my calls and come and be my knight in shinnying whatever like you said you were. I needed you Derek!" Meredith said raising her voice, then lowering it again. "I was scared and all alone, I needed you, I needed you!" Meredith wiped a tear from her face as she remembered how she felt back then. How scared and alone she was. Mark came into her life but she couldn't handle him then, she couldn't bare to think that she could be with anyone else other then Derek. But he persisted and stayed with her and held her hand when she needed him to.
Derek was so fixated on Mark, watching him touch her and kiss her. Ever since he saw them in the cafeteria together he couldn't get that image out of his head. And now that he had seen him talking on the phone with his son. Derek took a deep breath, he needed to apologise to Meredith, to make her see that he is here for her, like she wanted him to be. "Meredith, I am so sorry I wasn't there for you, and that I didn't answer your calls."
"Sorry is just not going to cut it anymore Derek, you left us and I don't see any point continuing this conversation. I told myself a long time ago that couldn't let you back in my life if you came back, and I still haven't changed my mind." Meredith turned around and began to walk away and back to the kitchen until she felt the urge to turn back around and just let it rip. All that bent up rage and emotion rushed to the surface, and she felt the need to just blast it at him. "The moment you left that is when my life turned to hell, when I started to fall apart. I had to answer everyone's annoying questions, and listen to everyone's annoying remarks about why you left and what did I do. And then I find out that I am pregnant and that I am carrying your baby. Then it came down to what I was going to do." Meredith held both hands open as if the decisions were right there in her hands. "Do I keep my dickhead of an ex-boyfriends baby or do I get rid of it like he got rid of everything he had in Seattle, like he got rid of me?" Meredith put down her hands.
"So you kept him, that must have been a hard decision for you," Derek said trying to sympathise with her, as his eyes sadden.
Meredith ignored his sympathy and continued. "Making that decision was the hardest thing I had to do, and that was the moment that I really needed you. I needed you by my side to help me, and no matter how hard I tried to get in contact with you, you never came Derek." Again Meredith wiped the tears from her face.
Derek walked over to her slowly. "Meredith I know that me saying sorry doesn't make up for what I did, but I am here now and I am willing to do what ever it takes to make up for what I did."
Meredith shook her head. "You being here now will never make up for you not being there when I needed you, when we needed you. And now that we don't need you, you will probably just leave again." Meredith started to walk away down the hallway.
"You're wrong!" Derek called to her.
Meredith stopped and walked back towards the lounge room. "What?"
Derek walked closer to her. "You're wrong Meredith. I won't leave again; I will never leave you and Lachlan again. I am here for the long haul."
Meredith didn't comment, she just turned and walked away to the kitchen.
Walking into the kitchen Meredith breathed a sigh of relief glad that was over. Sitting down on a stool that was near the bench she began pulling apart a piece of bread.
"How did it go?" Mark asked as he put out three bowls.
Meredith shook her head as she put a piece of bread in her mouth. "Don't ask."
Mark smiled and began to dish out the pasta. "Well Mere in my books, abandoning you and Lachlan is one of the lowest things you can do for a person."
"And that is why I am trying to talk to you to make up for what I have done."
Both Meredith and Mark looked to the hallway to see Derek standing there leaning up against the wall.
Meredith stood up and went over to Mark. "Look thanks for doing this Mark by I think I am just going to go."
"Meredith you don't have to leave," Mark said putting his hands around her waist and pulling her close to him. "We should be able to sit here like adults have a meal and work something out so where not at each others throats when you two are in the same room."
Meredith pushed herself away from him. "What happened to abandoning me and Lachlan was the lowest act he could have done?" Meredith asked.
"Well he gave me a chance after I slept with Addison, lets just say I am giving him the same chance he gave me," Mark said slightly smiling knowing that Meredith might not see things in the same way as he was.
"Well you might be giving him a chance but I'm not." Meredith walked past Mark, but was stopped by Derek.
"Meredith," he breathed as he took hold of her hand.
"Derek just go away, I just want to leave," Meredith said as she looked from her hand to Derek's face.
"It doesn't have to be like this Meredith," he said softly, ignoring the fact that Mark was in the room.
"Yes Derek it is going to be like this. You left me…You left us, and now you want back in and I am sorry you are not in charge of this situation, as I have all the cards. So when I'm ready to talk to you, or when I am ready for you to meet your son, I will let you know. Before then stay the hell away from us." Meredith pulled her hand away from him and walked away and out the door and closed it behind her.
Derek looked to Mark. "She doesn't want anything to do with me." Derek pulled his hand into a fist. "And it is all because of you." Derek also walked away from Mark and out the door slamming it behind him.