I'm SO sorry, i thought i had uploaded this chpater a few days ago! I came to check up on it... and realised I'd uploaded the document, but for soem reason hadn't chaptered it! Sorry!
A/N: This chapter is written in a different style, it hopefully is a little intense but not as intense as the last. It has been written, not to depict so much the mindless torture, pain and panic, but the confusion, and the disjointed aspect of the victim.
Note, it will get confusing with Severus as he's being once again split between two minds.
Warning: Important, this depicts rape, torture, minors, dark themes and malexmale situations.
Please don't read if the mention of those above offend you.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything and I'm not making any money from this.
Dark Lord's Mind Speech
:Severus's Mind Speech:
-
Chapter 19
HP
The burning cut through him, slicing through his thoughts as he stared at the dark mark on the pale skin.
He couldn't quite comprehend what the pain meant. Couldn't link the burn with his thoughts.
Then it clicked.
He was now a Death Eater.
And he was being called.
Teary eyes looked back at the body of the boy lying in the infirmary bed. It was a chance for him to help the man he had betrayed.
"I'm coming." Cold fingers, leaving the warmth of young skin as he stood and made his way out of the room, unseeing.
"Harry?" He heard the name, but couldn't answer. His mind was caught in his need to get the Dark Lord away from the other man, the need to protect what was his. The burning waves running up his arm, a pulse he had to respond to.
"Harry where are you going?" The voice firmer, as was the grip on his arm, pulling him away from his thoughts, out of the determination of his own mind.
"I have to go." He mumbled distractedly, feeling a little surprised when he was pulled back. "I'm being called." He added to answer the question in the medi witches eyes.
"What?" Dawning apprehension "You can't go!" The hand on his arm yanked at him. "You're not thinking properly. This has affected you deeply, you should be resting."
"No." He yanked at the restraint. Could feel the surprise at his outburst. "I have to go."
"You're not thinking straight Mr Potter. Now get back in that room and…"
"I can't." He pulled himself from the grip with a growl, pushing himself out the door. He didn't even register the shocked faces of students and teachers, all gathered outside waiting to hear the news about Harry Potter. Could only feel the stone beneath his feet as he ran through the castle, moving silently towards the edge of the wards.
He couldn't explain it, but he had to help the man who had pulled him out of trouble more times than he could count, sacrificing and forfeiting his life to play spy and protect not only him, but all the other ungrateful students. And now, once again he, Harry Potter, had placed the man in danger.
He couldn't explain it, but it was there. A need.
Harry grit his teeth, willing Severus to be safe, as he did something that came like second nature to him, though he had never consciously attempted it.
He Apparated.
SS
Severus couldn't quite comprehend what was happening. One minute he had been staring at his plate the next…
His mind blank with pain, a piercing light searing through his eyelids, so tangible he could almost taste it.
Who was screaming?
Then darkness.
And from darkness a laugh. A soft humourless laugh, that rang in his ears over the roar of his pounding heart and rushing blood. He'd heard that laugh before, that voice that slid over your skin, poisoned your mind and caught you.
Harry my love.
His psyche was brushed by stained thoughts and Severus flinched back.
I've missed your company dearly.
The Dark Lord's presence filled the empty blankness that had been torn into his mind with the pain.
Missed your screams.
Everything was ripped away from him and Severus could feel his skin burn, his bones grind, his jaw crack as it stretched in an endless yowl. His mind couldn't grasp anything except the pure white burning into him, even the sounds of his own screaming lost.
He was drowning in it, in pure liquid pain, where feeling was forgotten, where the breathe caught in your throat, trapped by convulsing muscles. Time stood still in the silence of rushing blood and pounding heart.
He couldn't see, he couldn't smell or taste anything except pain, except the buckling of his mind under the pressure.
And then it all stopped.
And Severus found himself disjointed in a limbo of aching haze, gulping mouthfuls of air as he tried to order his thoughts. He was in a vision, though in the last, he had at least had the chance to place it in it's context, before the torture had begun. This time he wasn't thrown into the midst of a Death Eater meeting, no cold stone, or men grovelling at his feet as he looked through the Dark Lord's eyes. Instead it was just the endless darkness you found in deep sleep.
What does it feel like Harry… to be trapped in your own mind?
Severus shuddered.
Don't worry, you won't be there for too long, I have a present for you.
And suddenly his vision filled with colour.
Dark shadows and blood.
The remains of a wizard or muggle being dragged from the room. The circle of Death Eaters closing on the smear of blood that led from the slowly seeping puddle in the centre.
His eyes caught the sound of faint struggle, of muffled screams and sobs. But the Dark Lord wouldn't allow him to turn his head, to see.
I'm sure you'll enjoy this.
Severus shudder in response to the words, hiding somewhere in the corner of the mad man's mind, trying to shrink back on himself. He just hoped to whatever God that may hear him that this would end soon, that he'd wake with the feeling of a warm hand in his, someone trying to pull him back.
He knew he'd be lucky to even survive tonight, if the Dark Lord hadn't been so distracted, he'd had ravaged his mind, would have seen the differences, would have seen that the person he was torturing was that of his 'loyal potion's master'. One small slip, one small stumble, projected thought, and not only would he be killed but Harry as well.
You do remember how this goes, don't you?
A small boy, Severus guessed 13 or 14, was brought before them gagged, face dirty with blood and tears, the rag forced in the boys mouth tinged red around the edges. The thin body was wracked with shudders, the eyes wild with fear. Severus felt himself gag, he hated the sight of children at the Dark Lord's hands.
And then he was reaching out.
The boy flinched from his touch. And Severus could feel. He could feel the soft skin of the young boys cheek, the way his finger tips caught on the roughness of dry blood, the warm dampness of salty tears. So innocent.
You do remember, it has been a while since we played this game.
He could feel the touch on himself, split between the boy and the other mind. It sent confusion flowing through him, torn in two personalities, fumbling for stable ground.
Then it occurred to him. Caught in the Dark Lord's mind, yet also the victim, hadn't Harry always told the headmaster he felt the phantom pains of Crucio cast on those that were tortured? Gritting his teeth, the innocence of the small boy's eyes burning into him, reminding him of the other. If he could feel the very touch of finger tips tracing skin… then what had Harry been through? These were no phantom feelings.
He had experienced the first vision and had been horrified, but he knew that a few Crucio's thrown his way was the least the Dark Lord could do.
HP
The burn in his arm had dulled as he landed awkwardly back into existence. The dark mansion he had seen once before in his visions seemed to tower over him, hunched like a beast waiting to pounce. The air tasted of magic and he realised he must have been close to the wards that surrounded the house.
"You're late Severus." A haughty voice called out, and Harry recognised the figure in the dark robe and mask.
"Lucius." He nodded in acknowledgement.
"Where is your uniform?"
Harry blinked at the question, cursing himself for his foolishness. He hadn't dressed for the occasion, hadn't even thought of the dark heavy robes or the mask. He had placed Severus in even greater danger with his stupidity, if he was recognised at this meeting by anyone, there could be disastrous consequences.
"I believed this was an individual calling, He seemed rather insistent."
"Of course. But remember, assumptions about our Lord leave one in a rather unpleasant state." The blonde flicked his wand and before Harry could tense, he was swamped in a thick robe, the mask clinging to his face. He had felt it before but it never ceased to amaze him, the sudden change from heavy and suffocating to lightness of both robe and mask. They looked both hefty and clumsy, but the robe flowed easily, almost magically, never getting in the way, nor hindering movement, while the mask, which at first felt suffocating before it ebbed to a slight tingle of magic on the skin, didn't hamper breathing, nor eye sight or hearing.
"My thanks." Harry bowed his head.
"Come. We have a different agenda tonight."
Harry frowned at the words. His purpose here tonight was to get the Dark Lord away from Severus, how could he do that if they threw this surprise at him.
"Be grateful." Lucius warned, hearing his unspoken frustration. "The Dark Lord is feeling particularly pleased tonight…"
There was a pause.
"Playful."
They both knew what that meant. One feared the Dark Lord when he was angered, but only when the mad man was pleased did he produce the most mind numbing terror in his subjects. When he was in high spirits, he toyed with his subjects, prisoners and victims.
To be a pawn in the Dark Lords game was worse than hell itself.
Physical pain a prayer.
SS
Seduce the boy, and he'll have a painless death.
Severus felt the shock split him to the core. :What:
The Dark Lord must have heard him.
I know it's been a while, we've been having fun playing other games. A dark chuckle. But I thought we could come back to this one. Only this time it's a little more involved.
Severus's mind was trying to understand what the soft hissing was trying to tell him.
I know you've enjoyed plundering another's innocence, stealing what you have lost…
The leer in the voice mocking him, and Severus felt ill. Harry had been forced to do what!
but this time the goal is more difficult. Seduce the boy, and bring him to completion. I know he's a little young. But he'll thank you for his painless death, he's already begged for it.
He glanced up at the surrounding Death Eaters, silent on their knees, bowed heads not daring to look him in the eye. And then he was moving, long graceful strides, while someone dragged him clumsily behind the Dark Lord, the world twisting in two different slides.
Trying not to let dizziness catch up on him, he found himself in a small room, a simple double mattress in the centre. The two Death eaters dragging the boy, him, left the room in silence.
He made no move toward the boy, simply staring as the small body lurched from him, backing into a corner, curling in on itself.
Or do you wish to spend the night torturing the little worm?
He felt himself pull the wand from his sleeve, and before he could stop the small body was enveloped in a green light and a high pitched screaming, which cracked and broke as the curse flooded Severus's body.
Another dark chuckle.
What do you say?
Swallowing pain and fear Severus grit his teeth. Perhaps if he could somehow turn this into his own game.
:I accept your challenge.: He hissed in his mind, and felt the Dark Lord let him have control of his body.
HP
"This is it." Lucious led Harry to a small room. "The Dark Lord has requested you stay in this room for the time being. Your purpose here will be revealed in time."
Harry nodded, but didn't say anything else, looking warily around the room.
He wasn't surprised by the 'request', as the Dark Lord had a tendency to keep his followers on their toes by presenting set challenges, but he was worried about what he would have to face. These tests, or games would be directed at Severus, for his skill level, his expertise. How could Harry even compare to the fully grown wizard?
Holding his breath, trying to think of a solution, he decided to wait and see what was going to happen.
SS
Severus felt awkward stepping forward in this different body, lurching a little towards the shaking, moaning form in the corner.
"I won't hurt you." His voice held the unfamiliar hiss to it. The boy flinched as he came closer, almost animalistic in his reaction. Kneeling he tried not to seem so intimidating, wanting only to pick the small child up and get him to safety.
A small scream and a whimper as his hand came in contact with the bare shoulder sticking roughly out of the torn shirt.
"Shhh." Severus bit his lip, trying not to grit his teeth as he felt the very same touch on himself.
So the Dark Lord was playing more than one game.
"Let me take away your pain." He received no response from the boy. The short spell he'd learnt in his basic self training as a spy should heal the minor cuts and bruises.
"I don't want to hurt you." He kept repeating softly, trying to get through to the boy. Waving the unfamiliar wand, and reciting the words. A scared whimper.
If he could get the child's co-operation, it could be so much easier trying to find a way out.
But first, another spell and any larger damage would be momentarily stalled from becoming worse. If the boy did have internal bleeding, they would have to find a medi witch.
Next a quick cleansing spell, and the boy moaned in fear with the feeling of magic running over him, through him.
"Shhh, I just want to help you." Severus leant a little closer. "Let me help you little one." His hand coming slowly to rest on a dark haired head. The boy flinched, but Severus kept his hand still, fingers threaded lightly through locks.
"Shhh." He hummed, slowly letting his hand move through the strands, stroking the small boys head, calming the nervous shudders.
When the boy seemed to calm a little, though still curled up on himself, Severus paused.
"I'm going to take your gag off all right? I'm not going to let any one hurt you anymore." Severus just hoped he'd be able to keep that promise. The knot at the back of the boys head was too tight, he didn't wish to use any more magic on the boy, knowing it would terrify the child. But there was no other choice.
"I'm going to use a little bit of magic to cut the rag, so don't be frightened." A quick spell and the rag loosened, with difficulty, the boy still curled up, he pulled the material away slowly, knowing that if the boy's lips had cracked from the screaming, the blood could have dried the fabric to the sides of the mouth.
Another whimper, and he had it free.
"Shhh, see it's alright." His hand back in the dark hair, stroking gently. "Why don't you tell me your name?" The boy had uncurled a little.
"Sam." He whispered, uncurling a little more, teary eyes turning to look at him.
Severus felt answering tears burn his throat, his heart sting as he looked down at the small pale face. He could only flounder in confusion, wondering what the Dark Lord was trying to do. What this could mean.
"My name is…"
His whisper broken by the large dark eyes, almost the colour of charcoal, mirroring his own onyx. The raven black hair, long and straight, now no longer matted with blood, soft and silky under his fingertips.
A hiss in the back of his mind.
Let the games begin.
-
--
---