When will you learn? Don't fight back…
WARNING: This fanfiction contains swearing, malexmale, violence, child abuse
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and Characters ©
Chapter 31
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Worthless.
Harry frowned, looking down at the potion stained hands.
Worthless because he couldn't save anyone.
Remus had sat down waiting for him to get changed. and Harry watched the man, did the amber eyed werewolf know that he, Harry Potter, saviour of the wizarding world, was a killer?
That it was his fault a small boy had died, his fault that Severus had been forced to kill an innocent child?
He shook his head slightly and Remus looked up at the movement.
"Don't worry so much, I'm sure it's not too bad, and Severus will find a cure for this soon enough." The werewolf had misinterpreted his self loathing and worry.
Harry gave a small smile that was more of a grimace. Would Remus abandon him if he knew? Never speak to him again except to insult or curse him. Would he hate him?
He should.
"I won't be long." Harry ducked away with the clothes under his arm. He drew in a deep breath, trying not to let his hand shake by curling it into a fist.
He changed quickly, trying not to let his thoughts run rampant, trying to reign in his tiredness, his worry, his fear, the way his stomach clenched as he recounted the last few days and what was in store for him and for Severus.
It didn't stop him from touching himself lightly, fingertips on pale skin.
Hating himself for it.
He couldn't even control his own impulses.
Worthless.
SS
The car pulled into a road where every lawn looked the same, every house had the same shape, same colour, same blank feel to it. They slowed down and Severus frowned up at the house, as identical to the next house as could be.
This was where he was going to be forced to spend his summer. Here, without a potions lab, without the comfort of his own walls or the promise of privacy, with muggles. Potter's family who would no doubt frustrate and annoy him, fawning over him for the next few weeks.
"Get out." It was an order and Severus blinked as he was hauled out of the car and pushed roughly and quickly up the stairs.
Of course, they didn't want their precious Potter to be targeted, he was safe only within these walls. It would make sense for them to get him into the house as soon as possible. He was surprised though when the large man kept pushing him roughly, up a flight of stairs and to a room which had a number of padlocks and a cat flap on it.
He unlocked them one by one and Severus had to resist the urge to comment on the fact that padlocks weren't going to protect him from the Dark Lord, and especially if they were on the outside of the door, before the walrus ran up the stairs.
"It won't burn dad." He shot a suspicious look at Severus, his grasp on his stick tightening. "The freaks put some kind of spell on it."
Severus didn't know what the boy was going on about, but he was pushed roughly into the room, tripping over his shorter legs, the door slamming shut behind him, the padlocks locking with an eerily loud snap and click.
"Have you tried the axe?" The man rumbled through the wood separating them, and Severus stared at the door in surprise as he heard the two descend heavily down the stairs. He glanced quickly around himself and blinked from his spot on the floor.
It stunk.
It was almost empty.
There were bars on the windows.
This wasn't a room.
It was a prison cell.
HP
Harry stepped out feeling a little self conscious under Remus's gaze, especially at the quirked eyebrow, when the man quickly looked him up and down.
"Well let's go then." He said with a false cheeriness, one that Harry had learnt to read and interpret. Remus had been an interesting man to try and read, he had so many unpredictable features due to his part werewolf nature. But Harry had worked hard and had eventually learnt to read some of the facets that the man possessed, both man and wolf.
Harry chose not to comment on the falseness, grateful that Remus hadn't commented on the obvious scent of muted arousal and self hatred on Harry.
Their walk to the edge of the grounds was silent, Harry kept up a stoic frown and Remus seemed lost in his own thoughts. It was only when Remus grabbed Harry around the waist, pressed himself hard up against the lithe form of the potions master did Harry give out a small surprised cry.
His eyes caught movement on the edge of the forest but the world fell away before he had time to register it.
He hit the ground hard and drew in a sharp breath when he felt the rock dig into his back, pressed in by the extra weight on top of him. Panic gripped him when he couldn't move, blinking rapidly at the sky, trying to shift the dead weight.
What had that been on the edge of the forest? Why wasn't Remus moving?
A muffled grunt, a warm breath in his ear, as the body above his shifted.
"Sorry about that Harry." Remus, rolled off him, getting up in one fluid movement. He rubbed the back of his head looking around, and Harry sat up doing the same. He drew in another quick breath… this wasn't the outskirts of Hogwarts.
They'd Apparated.
Apparating was nothing at all like Port keying, it didn't feeling like going through a flu either. He shook his hands a little, feeling the tingle of magic run through them. It felt different from when he had Apparated to the Death eater meeting, he was tingling with Remus's magic and his own magic sparked in displeasure.
"I saw Death Eaters. We didn't think they'd dare come so close to the school, should've guessed. You're not hurt are you?" Remus offered Harry a hand and he took it.
"No. I'm fine." He brushed himself off, his legs a little shaky. He looked around, surprised when before them stood a thick row of hedge, surrounding a small garden of a worn house.
"Usually Apparating is much more controlled, but I didn't have much time and Apparating two is more difficult." Remus was already walking towards the hedge, away from the house. He glanced back at Harry who had stumbled to catch up, still looking around.
"This is an Order protected area. Even if the Dark Lord traces us here, he can't trace the way we leave. Here." He handed what looked like a small bag of sweets to Harry, but before Harry could thank him his stomach dropped out to his feet and he felt the need to throw up.
A Port Key.
A flash of green.
Credric's fall to the ground lifeless.
Open , sightless eyes staring at him.
"Take my body back."
Harry choked as he slammed face first into dirt.
"Merlin, are you alright Harry?" Harry felt Remus pull him up, and brush him off. "Does it hurt badly?" The werewolf asked and Harry merely shrugged, trying to wipe the stray tears from his eyes, trying to find his own feet.
The impact had hurt, but not as much as the shock the Port Key had had on him, and the way Credric had looked at him, straight through him.
"I'm fine." Harry managed to choke, stumbling to keep himself upright.
He still felt like throwing up.
Nausea clawed at his insides.
"That's the lad." Remus clasped his shoulder gently. "We're almost at the station, it's just down in that small town." The amber eyed man pointed in the direction of a few brick red roofs that sat nestled in the rolling countryside.
Harry nodded and they both started down to the town in silence, Harry occasionally running his palms nervously on his thighs. He could feel the tension in the air between them and he didn't know if he wanted Remus to say what was on his mind, or to ignore it completely.
"Harry." They were almost at the small town, having found their way onto a thin road.
"Yeah." The answer was quiet, almost a whisper. Remus shot him a quick glance over his shoulder.
"I know you've been through a lot lately." The man drew in a deep breath and Harry tensed, waiting. "I just want you to know that we're always here for you."
Harry almost breathed a sigh of relief, it was just one of these talks. All he would have to do is nod and smile, assure them that he understood.
"I know this must be a confusing time for you. But we are always ready to help you, and even if you Godfather's a little rash sometimes and seems a little narrow minded and thoughtless, he really is a good man." The man took in a deep breath. "And I'm sure he'd accept your… sexual preference in partner's." Remus gave him a small smile and Harry felt like he wanted the earth to swallow him whole. How did that talk turn into this talk?
The man clapped him on the back. "And don't be embarrassed to talk about it, finding men attractive isn't something Sirius or I are unfamiliar with. I'm sure you've heard tales of Sirius's promiscuity when he was younger."
Harry pulled a face, trying hard not to imagine himself having a talk with Sirius right at this moment. In Snape's body, telling his Godfather that he liked men, potion's masters in particular, and could he please buy some wizarding condoms that go bang for him because technically Harry was still under age.
The small almost hysterical laugh didn't seem to go down too well with Remus, but they had entered the village and Harry rushed forward to what looked like the train station. He hoped there wouldn't be a continuation of this conversation on the train.
SS
"Hello?" Severus called out, listening intently to the footsteps down below. He could only make out a scuffling which he presumed was Petunia, as neither male would be able to lumber around so quietly. Standing up and brushing his hands on his jeans he walked cautiously over to the barred window. He was only just tall enough to see over the boarded up bottom half.
What he saw made his heart jump in his throat. The mad muggle man had taken an axe to his trunk, and the wood was splintering under the weight of the blade.
His trunk may have been spelled against fire, against being dropped, but against an axe? It was one of his lesser trunks, and luckily contained nothing of great importance, but to have it destroyed…
Severus clenched his fists. He could feel magic slowly winding itself through his veins as he tried to calm himself. It wouldn't do to release uncontrollable magic on these muggles, especially with the warning he had received just before he had left.
The Ministry had sent Dolores with a message, that if Mr Harry Potter performed any under-aged magic while on school holidays there would be certain consequences which could lead to the expulsion of said student. The toad of a woman had taken great pleasure in reading out the clause, and all the small fine print which defined just how easy it was to monitor him and to expel him without a second thought.
Of course she had continued with an explanation of just where he would end up, a ministry organisation for disciplining wayward wizards and witches, where not even Dumbledore could help him.
Severus scowled at the locked door cursing Potter under his breath.
There was only one explanation for this obvious disregard of his property, this focused attempt to destroy his belongings…
His fingers curled into a tight fist.
How dare the boy tell the muggles that he was Professor Snape?!
And how dare the muggles think they could get away with treating him this way? Obviously they wanted to exact their revenge for all the horrible things and exaggerated lies Potter probably told them he did to the boy.
Why else would they be treating him in this fashion?
A small thought echoed through the back of his mind, that perhaps this was the way Potter was always treated. But he brushed it away roughly. No, Potter had told the Dursley's that the boy who they were boarding for the summer was one Professor Snape, that had to be it.
Severus glanced around the room, his thoughts a little unsure, it didn't look like this room had been set up recently. In fact the bars showed signs of ageing, the padlocks hadn't looked new, and the room smelt as if it had been left for years in this disgusting state.
"Boy!" The footsteps on the stairs, and Severus turned to face the opening locks. The hulking man strode in and knocked him down with a lazy backhand.
He stared up with an open mouth. It hadn't hurt, it just shocked him.
"What have I told you about standing in my presence? Here's the paper and the pen. Those people want letters to make sure you're alright. One for every three days. Hurry up, I don't have time to waste with you."
Severus stared up at the man in horror, then at the paper.
"Well what are you waiting for?" The man moved closer and Severus blinked, quickly picking the paper up, and the pen that had been thrown in his direction. "Write. To who it may concern, I'm fine, you don't need to worry about me. Signed Potter. Now write it."
Severus knelt, writing quickly, his mind in turmoil as he tried to sort this scenario through. What was happening? Was this really how Potter was treated at home?
"Good." The man snatched the letters up with one fat hand before he made his way back to the door. There was nothing else said, and Severus was left staring at the locked door as the light outside grew dimmer. Realising just what he had done. That was to be his only form of communication this summer, Hermione had taken Hedwig, saying it was where the owl always spent the holidays. He had no owl and any other way of contacting the wizarding world was out of the question, because not only would the Dark Lord be actively looking for him and Potter, but every other organisation seemed hell bent on keeping an eye on them as well.
He had been told that he was to limit all communications, that no magic use or magical means of contacting people was to be allowed. It would give off a signature that the Dark Lord could easily trace and hone in on.
It was too dangerous.
The only reason the wards held was through the weak link of Potter and Petunia, and even this would not stand against a direct assault by the Dark Lord. It was merely for hiding the boy, for disguising his magic and his location.
He turned from the window glaring at the locked door.
Severus was sure the spell did not include him, that he was under no such protection sitting in a house full of foolish muggles waiting for the Dark Lord to find him, unable to even get out of this room without alerting the authorities.
Severus glanced at the small pile of dirty blankets shoved into a corner, a bucket closer to the door.
There was very little else and Severus felt suddenly exhausted. He'd only just recovered from those strenuous few days, and this new place, this new setting, and new perspective sapped at his energy. He would work all of this out tomorrow, for now he would play along.
He curled up on the pile of rags, just small enough to fit.
HP
Harry boarded the train, Remus not far behind as they sat down in an empty compartment. The train lurched, starting up almost as if it had been waiting for them to arrive before it left.
"Harry." The voice was concerned and Harry stared determinedly out the window. "I know I shouldn't pry, but I am worried about you."
There was a pause and a clearing of the throat.
"Sometimes, during adolescence, when you are in close contact with one person for great amounts of time… you become attached to them."
Harry stared a little harder at the green rolling paddocks.
"Not emotionally of course." Remus hurried on. "But perhaps you find yourself attracted to them, well, lusting after them."
Harry twitched, but refused to look at the other man.
"Harry, just be careful, you're just coming to accept your sexual preferences and finding yourself suddenly with the ability to explore another man's body-"
"Stop." Harry turned to his Godfather's best friend. "Please Remus." It was almost a plea and sounded odd coming out in Severus Snape's voice. "I don't want to talk about it."
Remus frowned.
"It is still Severus's body, Harry." A sigh. "Just be careful, and don't do anything foolish."
Harry shivered. Remus had read him so well, had seen all the small things he was struggling against, he wondered if the werewolf knew more about him then he let on.
The rest of the train ride was silent and Harry found himself nodding off, his head occasionally hitting the window, jolting him awake. He was shaken awake by Remus and found the train was slowing down.
Glancing outside he was surprised to find it had grown dark, small lights of a train tunnel flickering as they travelled past.
"We're almost there."
Harry nodded, stretching a kink from his neck.
His new home.
SS
Severus woke at the noise outside his door, quickly assessing where he was and why his back felt like he'd been sleeping on the floor. Frowning he shifted on the pile of rags that had served as his bedding, waiting for the noise again.
Another lock clicked open and Severus wondered who was trying to sneak in. He shifted ever so slightly, getting to his feet, moving swiftly and quietly across the room, waiting behind the door, ready to attack.
Click and Snap.
The door handle begun to turn slowly and Severus tensed waiting, his eyes already adjusted to the dark.
He hadn't expected the three boys that came in and they hadn't expected him to be ready. They stumbled into the dark room and Severus recognised the walrus cousin, behind him was tall and thin, another was a head shorter then the over weight boy.
"Oi, where's he gone?" The tall one spoke in a rough whisper.
"What do you want?" Severus stepped out from behind them and they spun as one to face him.
"Magic." the shortest gasped and Dudley stepped forward.
"You're not allowed to do that! The other freaks said so." The fat boy grinned evilly, though to Severus it was little more then a grimace and a squinting of the eyes. "Now we have to punish you."
There was glee in that voice and Severus felt the urge to stun the boy, but before he had even finished that thought and the following consequences, a blow connected with his stomach and he stumbled, gasping for air.
He looked up in disbelief at the grinning face of the three boys. He could smell alcohol on them and suppressed a shudder, both muggles and wizards had fallen to the power alcohol seemed to possess over the mind. Which was why he only ever took it in moderation, he didn't not wish to pass his control over to a mere concoction of hops and yeast.
He ducked another blow and staggered back from another. Regaining his breath and feet, stepping back and putting distance between him and the other three.
"I've missed a good game of hunt the freak." The shorter chortled quietly and Dudley grunted.
"Keep quiet, you idiot. Vernon and Mum went out, but we still have neighbours."
Severus could see them moving in closer, trying to trap him in the small room. His eye caught the door and he slowly shifted.
He didn't know what they were planning, but it probably didn't involve anything pleasant. He was not in the mood to get beaten into the ground, because he knew, even though he had the experience, the skill, this body could not stand up to three men bigger and stronger than he was, especially in this small room. And he knew he couldn't use magic, nto with the threats and warnings he had received.
If he didn't get expelled, the Dark Lord would find him, and what was a few muggles compared to the Dark Lord?
He frowned.
His only chance was to escape.
Slipping closer to the door, the three boys didn't realise what he had done until his hand had closed on the door knob and he had wrenched the unlocked door open. Spinning he felt the fresh air hit him before a large hand grabbed him roughly on the fore arm and dragged him back into the room, throwing him onto the floor.
The door was closed and he heard a click.
Locked.
Glancing at the three, he frowned weighing up his options.
They knew he was different, strange. Dudley knew he was a wizard and obviously hated him for it.
They were all drunk.
He couldn't perform magic.
He was physically smaller and weaker.
They could, if they were drunk enough beat him to death without knowing it. If he was injured badly enough it wouldn't matter if he was a wizard, he wouldn't be able to contact anyone to come and help him.
Not even a potion's master can create a potion from thin air.
They stepped closer to him, towering above him from his position on the floor.
He needed to alert someone, and if Petunia and Vernon were out, the closest would be the neighbours.
He opened his mouth to scream.
And felt a crushing weight on top of him, a hand crushing his throat.
"No, no dear cousin. You forget your lesson." The voice was a hard whisper. And Severus gasped, his vision going black.
"You'll just have to learn it again."
The chuckles echoed in his ears.
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To be cont'