A/N: Ok so the craziness continues! Let's see what else the animal and the deadman have in store for our resident degenerates. I didn't expect this chapter to be so long, but I didn't want to split it up because it might have thrown off the flow, so please enjoy1

Disclaimer: see chapter one

Summary: After DX's commercial when Shawn snapped because of the elimination playset, Shawn asks Hunter to do him a favor and the game is very reluctant to do so. Through many twists and turns this does explain why Hunter because of Shawn, got banned from Wal-Mart.

Shane sighed as Hunter ran out to the ring late again. This was the third time he had missed his cue to get in to the ring in a week. Shawn had told him this might happen after Dave stole his sledgehammer, but there was nothing he could do. Plus there was the whole hair dying incident from last week. The crowd still laughed every time Hunter or Shawn came to the ring. 'I guess Jeff used the long lasting dye this time.'

He really did feel sorry for them, but his father already said Hunter had to pay his debt to Taker and Dave because if they hadn't helped catch Shawn, they would probably be paying for a whole new Wal-Mart instead of some property damage and some mustache repair surgery for that manager Hunter attacked.

After the show, Shane went and found Hunter, who was sitting in the locker room staring off into space with a depressing look in his eyes. "Hunter what's going on with you?"

Hunter just sighed and continued to stare at the wall, completely ignoring Shane. Shawn walked over to them and patted him on the back sadly. "It really won't work man. Unless he gets his hammer back it'll just get worse."

"You gotta be kidding me! He's been off in all his matches and keeps going into this hypnotic trance at the strangest times." He turned to Hunter and stared in straight in the eyes. " If this is about your hammer, then I suggest you either get a new one or get your old one back from Dave!"

Shawn nodded. "I tried giving him another one. He hit Randy with it one time and could tell that it wasn't his. He is definitely going into stage two, and if we don't do something fast then the hallucinations are gonna start."

"Hallucinations?"

"Yeah. It only happens when he's without his hammer for a few weeks, so we do have some time to fix this." he explained.

Shane sighed and began walking out of the locker room, "Shawn do whatever you have to, but please fix him!"

After the door slammed shut Shawn turned around, only to see Hunter jump up with an elated grin on his face. "Shawn! I have an idea to get my sledgy back!"

"What kind of idea?" He asked nervously. He knew if Hunter was still mad that he got him banned from Wal Mart, he could probably end up as some kind of bait.

"Well...you know how protective I am over my sledgehammer and I know how you get whenever somebody decides to mock the chaps, so I was thinking maybe we could steal something important from Dave and Taker and force them to give sledgy back to me!"

Shawn smirked. He was liking this idea more and more. This would be perfect, especially after it was their fault his hair was ruined in the first place. "This sounds perfect! I know exactly what we should take too."

"Good, because you'll be the one doing the taking."

The smirk fell from Shawn's face, "Wait...what?! No way! This was your idea, so you do it!"

Hunter shook his head, "Too predictable. Besides, with some of the heists you've pulled before, you would get away easy."

"No! I've already had my hair dyed and if Taker and Dave catch us I don't want to know what they'll do."

Hunter went over to his friend and clasped him on the shoulder. "Shawny, I don't have any experience stealing other people's stuff and actually getting away with it unlike you." Hunter continued as he glared at him. "Just picture it Shawn. No one has ever thought of doing something like this before. This would make you a legend backstage!"

Shawn thought it over. "Well...I'll do it. Only because Shane looked like he was gonna hit you with a coast to coast if you didn't come out of your depression."

"So you noticed that too huh?"

"Yeah. If we had a garbage can I really think you would be unconscious right now. Your depressing mood was starting to get to him."

"Ok ok I get your point. Let's get back to the plan!" Shawn nodded. "Now my very detailed and well thought out plan goes a little something like this..."

"Well?!" Shawn shouted impatiently.

"I'll distract Dave and Taker while you sneak in and grab their stuff." Hunter grinned as he finished explaining his plan. "This is pure genius isn't it?!"

Shawn stared at him disbelief. "You gotta be kidding me. This is your detailed plan? How long did it take you to think of this anyway?!"

"Ummm...bout 15 minutes. Give or take a couple."

"Oh." Shawn froze before a grin broke out across his face. "Great plan then! Now let me tell you what I had in mind for us to take..."

Hunter nervously outside of Taker's dressing room. He hated coming up with ideas. It was so much easier for Shawn to have ideas and then blame him when they went wrong. 'I really hope this works. I have to get sledgy back!'

Hunter took a deep breath and bounded happily into the room. "Hey Taker. Dave. I was wondering if you wanted to get something to eat? You know maybe get some steak or a big mac. I hear catering finally decided to get those in stock."

Dave looked at him skeptically, "What's going on Hunter?"

"You've never been this cheerful since you became our servant." Taker added.

"Things can change can't they guys? I mean it's only been a few days, so I really might as well make the best of this!"

Taker stared at him, as if he were searching for something. "Who are you and what have you done with Hunter?" He looked over at Dave. "It's still not possible to clone people right?"

"That's what I thought. Maybe he's a pod person like you see in those science fiction movies?"

Taker nodded and jumped off the bench, "You just read my mind." He grabbed one of Hunter's arms and Dave grabbed the other. "Let's go see what kind of alien he is. I think catering still has some leftovers from three weeks ago. We could feed them to him and see what happens."

"Yeah!" Dave exclaimed as they dragged him into the hall, "If he's really a pod person all that stuff shouldn't bother him a bit!"

"Guys can't we talk about this first..." Hunter reasoned.

"Sorry pod person, but we earthlings don't negotiate with aliens." Dave said.

Shawn watched the scene painfully as they dragged his friend away. 'I feel really sorry for Hunter now. First he loses his hammer and now he's being force fed moldy leftovers. Well after this, at least one part of that problem should be solved.'

Shawn made sure the coast was clear before he dashed into the locker room, making sure to lock the door behind him. "Now Hunter told me I had to do this with stealth and finesse..." He snorted at this. "Whatever the hell that means." He went through the locker room like a blonde tornado until he had searched every inch of the room.

He sat on a bench with a look of deep thought on his face. "It should not be this hard to find a hat!" He slammed his hands down on the bench his his fist connected with something soft. He looked down and realized he'd just put a sizable dent in Taker's black hat. "Oh. Well that should have been obvious." He grabbed the hat and stuck it in his bag. "Now it's time to find one other item."

Now he started looking through Dave's things. "If Taker left his hat in the open, Dave wouldn't have bothered to hide his stuff either." Instead of what he was looking for Shawn found a box, which when he opened it, had another box inside. In that box, there was another box. This is continued for a minute until he finally found what he was looking for and picked it up. "I'm never gonna let Dave live this one down." he chuckled.

In the Heartbreaker's hands was a small dark brown bear that looked strangely like Dave. Shawn could tell it was old. One of the eyes was missing and it had been sewn up many times. There was even a patch of sewn on black fur at the top of the bear's head that looked like hair. That wasn't what got his attention though, around the bears waist was a mini world title belt. Snickering, Shawn dropped the bear into his bag and started walking out until he realized he forgot to leave the ransom note.

He grabbed the crumpled up note out of the pocket of his dress and tacked it on the wall. "That should do it. After they see this, they'll have no choice but to give sledgy back to Hunter." He stuck his head out of the door to make sure there was no one in the hallway before he back out of the room. He kept backing up until he hit something warm, hard, and solid. He turned around to face Chris and Punk.

"What's got you so jumpy Shawn?" Chris asked.

"Umm...nothing. Nothing. Just doing some cleaning for Taker." He stuttered back nervously.

"You're doing some cleaning? Willingly? Are you sure you're not a pod person too?" Punk asked.

"Of course not! Do I look like an alien to you?!"

They both glanced at each other. "Well..."

Shawn glared at them. "Don't even answer that."

Punk just happen to glance at the sack Shawn was holding, "Shawn what's that?"

"Oh this? It's just some trash I found in their locker room." He tried to hide it behind his back but Chris kept reaching for it.

"Let me see. I loaned Dave some of my CD's a few weeks ago and you might have grabbed them by mistake."

Shawn panicked. He couldn't let either one of them touch the bag. Hunter would kill him. Then Taker would bring him back to life so he and Dave could kill him again. He just couldn't risk that, so he did the first thing he could think of...gave Chris a nice dose of Sweet Chin Music.

Punk looked on in confusion. "Shawn! What the hell did you do that for?"

Shawn laughed nervously and took off back toward his and Hunter's dressing room. "Sorry about that Chris. I saw a bug on your face and I couldn't let it bite you. Who knows what kind of weird and unusual diseases that thing could have. I did you a favor. Remember that!"

Punk stared at Shawn's retreating form as he helped Chris up. "Now what do you think that was about?"

Chris rubbed his jaw gently, the pain from his kick still coursing through it. "I don't know, but I'm sure I don't want to find out.

Dave and Taker walked sadly back to their locker room. Hunter had turned out to be just a regular human after all, but he did turn a nice shade a of green when they fed that food. "This really sucks Deadman. I really thought that we were on to something here."

"I know, but there's always next time buddy." He said as he opened the door to their room. "Now let's get Shawn and tell him to bring us..." He trailed off as he looked at the destruction of the room.

Dave slid in past Taker and looked around. "What the hell happened in here?!"

"I don't know, but this reeks of a big nosed game and a balding heartbreaker." He looked around and found a piece of paper tacked on to the wall. He grabbed it off the wall and could instantly recognize Shawn's messy handwriting:

To Taker and Dave,

Just to let you know, for once this wasn't my idea. Hunter was set on getting his sledgehammer back so we ended up doing this. Well anyway if you look around you'll notice that your locker room has been trashed. If you look closer then you realize some very important items are missing. On a side note, that box idea was a great idea Dave. I have to use it sometime. Now Hunter told me to tell you that until you give sledgy back we will hold your stuff hostage. When you want to arrange a trade you know where to find us.

From Shawn and Hunter.

A.K.A HBK, the showstopper, the icon, the headliner, Mr. Wrestlemania and the main event, and the King of kings, the cerebral assassin, and the game.

Taker stared down at the note then stared at Dave. "Hunter really needs to stop letting Shawn write letters." he turned to face Dave who seemed to be on the border of pissed and hysterical. "What the hell did he take from you?"

"He took...he took...Mr. Champs!" Dave stuttered out.

"Mr. Champs?"

Dave nodded. "I've had him since I was a kid. I designed him to look just like me, world title belt included. They're gonna pay for this when I get my hands on them!"

"Take it easy. You don't see me acting like this because they stole something from me."

"Well I don't see your hat anywhere deadman."

Taker froze and immediately started searching the room. By the time he was done there was a pile of junk in the same spot where Dave used to be. "I can't believe those dumbasses stole my hat! I can't have a match without my lucky hat!

Dave walked out of the pile and shook himself off. "You have to calm down! I want Mr. Champs back as much as you want your hat back, but I don't think they're finished yet. Those two degenerates always have another trick up their sleeve."

"At the moment I really don't care. They are gonna pay dearly for this one!" Taker stalked out of the room and charged down the hall, but froze halfway when he realized

there wasn't anyone behind him. "Will you come on?!"

"I'll wait here. Someone will have to save you when you walk into their trap."

Taker walked back into their locker room, "Well what do you suppose we do Dave?"

He thought it over for a minute and an idea clicked when he heard the the voices of John and Randy coming down the hall.

"So he just kicked him and ran off?" John asked.

"Yeah. He said something about killing a bug on him, but who really knows with Shawn. He could still be pissed about the whole hair thing." Randy added.

"Figures. If he hadn't destroyed part of Wal-Mart this wouldn't have happened."

Dave took this moment to step out of the room. "I'm glad you think that John because I need a favor from all of you that concerns our favorite degenerates."

The two superstars looked at each other and shook their heads. "I don't think so."

"It's nothing dangerous like what we had to do. All we need is for the two of you to pretend to be us for a a little while so we can get our things back."

"What are you talking about?" John said.

"Shawn and Hunter some some very important items from the two of us and we need your help to get them back." Taker said calmly.

"You gonna tell us what was stolen?" Randy asked curiously.

"Of course...when hell freezes over that is."

"Well if you want act like that then maybe we just won't help you then."

This time it wasn't Taker who snapped, but Dave. He charged at Randy and grabbed him the the collar and held him against the wall. "Listen up Orton! If you two help us out, I'll make sure you understand the real meaning of unleash the animal! Got that?"

Dave dropped Randy back to the ground. "All right! I'll help you. No questions asked ok?"

"Perfect. What about you Cena?"

John raised his hands defensively. "Same here Dave. I'll help you two. It's really no problem."

Taker and Dave both grinned. "Great. Now this is what you're gonna do. You two are gonna go to meet Hunter and Shawn to get our stuff back and when you have everything, that's where we come in and get our sweet revenge." Taker explained.

"Why does this sound like it's gonna be painful?" Randy muttered to John.

"Because when it involves these guys it usually always is."

"Shut up!" Taker shouted. "We only have about an hour left until the meet and that means we have a lot of work to do if we're gonna pass you two off as us."

"Are you sure this is gonna work?" Randy asked as he adjusted his black wig. He was currently dressed in Taker's ring gear, but because of the height difference he had to wear lifts in his boots.

'I hope they're in a badly lit room when this goes down.' Taker thought. "You look fine quit worrying so much. Dave should be the one having the problem here."

"Shut up Taker!" Dave said as he finished with the spray on tan. He stood back and smiled at his work. "I think I did pretty good don't you?"

John looked in the mirror and wanted to scream at what he saw. His normally pale complexion had disappeared thanks to Dave and his heavy duty use of instant tan spray. He had one of those fake beards which was shaved until there was a thin strip of hair under his chin, which had then been glued on. "What the hell did you do to me?!"

"Don't worry about it. Everything I did can be fixed so just take it easy."

"Look you two, we have bigger things to work about then how you look at the moment. Do you two remember the plan?" Taker asked.

The two imposters nodded. "Good." Dave handed Randy the bag that had sledgy in it. "When everything has been exchanged give us the signal and we'll be right in."

"We got it already. Now let's get this over with. I think this wig is gonna give me head lice." Randy said.

Dave nodded. "All right. I called Hunter a little while ago. They're gonna meet you upstairs in Vince's office. Somehow they managed distract him and threw him out of his office for the rest of the day."

Taker continued, "In simple terms, don't be nervous. Just make the trade and get out of there. We'll handle the rest."

"Alright." John turned to Randy and nodded. "Let's do this."

Taker and Dave watched nervously as their two look-a-likes began the walk up to Vince's office. They knew it was a stretch if anybody believed John and Randy were them, but then again, they were dealing with Shawn and Hunter so logic really doesn't play to much of a role here.

"Well there it is." John said as the stood in front Vince's door. "I hope this works."

"You're not the only one." Randy looked back and saw the real Dave and Taker hiding behind at the end of the hallway. He hesitantly took a few steps forward and knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" Shawn asked and few seconds later Randy heard a thump and an "ow!" coming from inside the office.

Randy nodded at John and he handed him a tape recorder that had Taker's voice on it. Before Shawn could ask questions he hit play. "Open the damn door you dumbasses! I want my stuff back!"

The lock clicked and the door opened. "Come on in guys and let's get started." They heard Hunter say. The two stepped into the darkened room and the door instantly closed behind them. "You'll have to excuse Shawn. After I told him not to about a hundred times, he still decided to order some pizza and have it delivered here." They heard the creak of a chair and knew Hunter had sat down. "Now you have something I want and I have something you want. Who wants to trade off first?"

Randy hit play on the recorder again. "Show us the stuff first."

Hunter nodded and Shawn produced a bag. He went to hand it to John, but froze. "Where's sledgy?"

John picked up the bag Taker had given him and held it out at the same time. "We switch on three?"

Shawn rose his eyebrows and pulled the bag back, "You voice doesn't sound right." He turned to Randy. "And why do I keep hearing static whenever you talk?"

Randy knew that Taker hadn't recorded any kind of answer for that, so he had to resort to his Undertaker impression which he had worked on perfecting the last couple of years, "You're just hearing things Shawn. I've told you to get that checked out already."

Before Shawn could answer him, Hunter interrupted. "Can we please get this over with! I want my sledgehammer back!"

Shawn glared at him. "Fine!" He walked up to John and held the bag out in front of him. "Since Mr. King of Kings is in a hurry over there, we should get this over with."

They walked up to each other and began to count.

"One."

"Two."

"Three!"

They switched off the bags and John and Randy instantly hit the door, knocking three times to give Dave the signal. When John went to turn around, he accidentally hit the light switch and the whole room was instantly illuminated. "Damn it!"

Shawn looked up at them and glared at Hunter. "I told you there was something not right about them, but no you didn't want to listen to me!"

Hunter opened that bag that supposedly had sledgy in it and found nothing but a bunch of wooden logs. "Shawn would you stop yelling at me and catch them!"

Shawn shrugged and tried to tackle Randy, but by this time they had gotten the door open and he ran face first into the real Taker. "Hey there heartbreaker did you have fun going through our stuff?"

Shawn stumbled back nervously and hid behind Hunter. "It wasn't my idea this time!"

Hunter glared back at his friend. "Some friend you are. How could you just sell me out like this?"

"When you have a pissed off animal and deadman stalking toward you, it's every man for himself."

Hunter gave him one last glare before turning back to Taker. "Look we gave you your stuff back. Now all we want is the hammer."

Then Dave walked in holding sledgy in his hands. "You mean you want this hammer?" Hunter nodded vigorously. "Well I don't think can do that just yet. You two deserve some kind of punishment for the stunt you pulled, don't you think deadman?"

Taker smirked evilly, "I do think that a punishment is in order." He turned to John and Randy. "Tie them up."

They nodded and went over to the captives. Randy took a step toward Hunter and he picked up a log. "One more step and we're gonna play whack a legend killer." Of course Randy didn't listen and was hit in the head.

Taker sighed. "I told you we shouldn't have given him logs."

"Well we had to do something. I wanted Mr. Champs back!" He paused once he realized what he said. "I just said that out loud didn't I?"

"Yeah you really did." Shawn said.

Dave glared at him, "Anyone in this room mentions anything about what I said, I'll have Taker send you to the gates of hell, understood?"

There was four nods and Dave smiled. "Great. Now John, you and Randy can go we'll handle them from here."

John and Randy quickly left before the animal's wrath could be brought on them. "Now what do you think we should do to them?" Dave asked.

"I have the perfect idea. We'll start on Shawn first. Go get his hat collection out of the hall." Dave nodded and walked out of the room. When he returned he was dragging a long table filled with every single hat Shawn had ever worn since he got to the WWE.

Shawn looked on in terror. "No...not the hats. Anything but the hats!"

Dave patted him on the shoulder. "Don't worry Shawn. One day you'll find something else to cover up that spreading bald spot." He turned back to Taker. "Time to light up deadman!"

Taker took the lighter he had save for this very moment and lit one of the cowboy hats on fire. Shawn couldn't look away. He was frozen in shock and they had taped his head to the chair so he couldn't turn his away. "Why?! What will I use to cover my head now!"

"This had to be done Shawn." Taker said. He grabbed an extinguisher and put out the fire, but all that was left was a bunch of ashes. "Hopefully this should teach you something, but if it doesn't then this next thing should." Dave wheeled in TV and placed it in front of Shawn.

"This TV has been designed to play non stop Village People music videos and in between there are clips of you and that dance you used to do in the ring." Dave explained as he put a set of headphones on Shawn. "You also have to listen to their music too. Enjoy!" As soon as he hit play Shawn's screams started.

Hunter watched in disbelief, "How could you do this to him?! Nobody deserves that kind of punishment!"

Dave smirked. "If you think what we're doing to him is bad, just wait and see what we're gonna do to you."

Hunter gulped as Taker brought in a table that had various buckets sitting on it. "I'm afraid to ask, but what's in those buckets?"

"Don't worry about it. You'll find out soon enough." Dave placed sledgy on the table next to the buckets and looked over at Taker, "What should we use first?"

"Let's start simple. Use the mud first."

Dave nodded. "Works for me." He looked over at Hunter. "Everyone knows how obsessive you are about that hammer. It has its own case and Shawn once told me you rented a room for it once, so we've decided to make a few improvements to it."

Taker took the first bucket which was filled to the brim with mud and dumped it over sledgy and began rolling the hammer around in it. Hunter's eyes widened until they looked like they were gonna burst out of his skull. "HOW COULD TARNISH SLEDGY LIKE THAT! IT'LL TAKE FOREVER FOR ME TO FIX HIM!"

"By the time we're done, that won't be the only thing you'll have to fix. Dave! Put on your gas mask." Taker slipped a mask on his face and started searching for another bucket.

Dave grabbed one as well and put one on Shawn, "I can't have you passing out just yet. Your movie isn't over yet." By now Shawn had been reduced to a zombie. His eyes were frozen wide open and every five minutes he kept screaming, "TURN IT OFF!"

When the deadman finally found the one he was looking for, he opened it and a horrid stench filled the room. Hunter recognized the smell instantly. "Why...? You two must be really off your rockers if bottled up CM Punk's sweat socks."

"Why do you think we have gas masks? We not off our rockers. We just want revenge." Taker picked up the bucket and held it over the hammer. "And we're about to get it." At that moment he spread the pile of socks over the hammer and Hunter nearly passed out.

"OH MY GOD! I"LL NEVER GET THE SMELL OUT OF THE WOOD! STOP! PLEASE STOP!" he shouted hysterically.

"Sorry Hunter, but we have one more thing left before we can stop." Dave said.

"What...do you mean?" The sound of the sander instantly caught Hunter's attention. "Please don't tell me you're gonna do what I think you're gonna do with that."

Hunter decided that seeing Taker with an innocent look on his face was the scariest thing he had ever seen in his life. "Of course not Hunter. I'm just gonna give sledgy a little cleaning." The sander made a loud grinding when it connected with the wooden handle.

"NOOOO! How could you do this to me?! Please stop!"

Taker stopped the sander just before he cut through the handle. "Now you're not gonna kidnap are things again are you?"

"NO! I promise. Just stop making sledgy suffer!" he cried.

"That's all I needed to hear." Taker put the sander down and untied Hunter while Dave untied Shawn. "I hope you learned something from this."

"I'M NEVER GOING TO THE Y.M.C.A AGAIN!" Shawn screamed.

"Great! It's gonna take months to get him back to normal, if I ever do." Hunter said. "You two will pay for making sledgy suffer like this!"

"Sure you guys. We'll leave you two here to get yourselves together." Dave said as he and Taker walked out of the door.

Taker grabbed his hat out of the bag and handed Mr. Champs back to Dave. "I still can't believe you have that thing."

Dave stopped talking to the bear and hugged him tightly. "Oh shut up! You know if you tell anyone about this I'll have to kill you too."

"Whatever Dave, so when do you think Hunter will realize that wasn't sledgy we just destroyed?"

"Probably..." Before Dave could finish a shout of "YOU ASSHOLES!" echoed through the hallway. "Now."

Taker grinned and tugged on his hat. "I hope this month goes by very, very slow. I can already see that this is definitely gonna be fun."