AN: Hopefully this has enough description for you, Maia. :P Also, I like what I wrote better towards the end of the chapter, but that's just me. Sorry that this doesn't have much action yet. I'm still shaping the way this fanfic's gonna go.

Chapter 5: Mixed Feelings

Lily's POV:

I woke up the next morning, only to remember what had happened the night before. Feeling miserable, I was about to turn over to fall back to sleep, when I saw how little light there was outside. Maybe I could get some studying done, and then get down to breakfast quickly so I wouldn't have to see anybody.

But when I tiptoed down to the common room, someone was already there. I was about to head back upstairs when I saw that it was Sirius.

I walked in, and sat next to him. He jumped.

"Oh, morning Lily," he said, "You surprised me."

"Sorry," I replied, not really meaning that I was sorry for surprising him; I was apologizing for something else. Sirius knew what I meant.

"Lily, don't blame yourself, it wasn't your fault."

"No, but that's just the thing, Sirius, it is my fault." I started to cry again.

Sirius grabbed me in a hug and held me there, patting my back and murmuring words of comfort until I had calmed down. I looked up into his face, hating to see the sorrow from the loss of James there.

"Don't worry, Lily, everything will be all right," he said, and I sighed.

"But how?" at this point, I was just trying to keep him talking, so he wouldn't loosen his hold on me. As mushy-gushy as this sounds, I felt safe in Sirius' arms.

"I'm not sure, love, but everything will work out."

Love. He called me "love". If I was a fainting type of girl, I might have passed out then and there. But instead, I just continued to gaze up into his beautiful eyes.

We stayed there for what seemed like hours, until we heard someone coming down the stairs.

"I'd better go get dressed," I said, blushing. I was still in my pajamas, which were rather short and revealing. I gave Sirius a kiss, and went up to my dormitory.

Sirius' POV:

As Lily left, I gazed after her. She really was gorgeous.

Sighing, I turned back to my Charms paper. A few moments later I heard a very familiar voice.

"Oh, it's you."

James had apparently also come down early in the hopes of not seeing anyone.

"Morning." I mumbled, not wanting to speak to him.

He grunted, and started on his own homework. We sat in silence, and after a while, the tension was too much.

"Look James, if we're going to hate each other, can we at least be on speaking terms?"

"Sure," he said, after a moment's pause, "But we're not mates yet. You… Well, it'll take some time."

"Yeah, okay," I agreed, happy that at least he wasn't yelling anymore.

James' POV:

Sirius and I sat for a little while longer, and then I decided to get some breakfast. Of course, there was no one in the Great Hall yet, but the Marauders knew a way to get to the kitchens.

I walked down to the image of a fruit bowl and tickled the pear. The picture swung open, and a house elf appeared.

"What would you like today, Master Potter?" the elf asked. I was a regular.

"Pumpkin juice and treacle tart," I replied without hesitating.

After the elf had brought me my breakfast, I walked to a deserted classroom, and began to eat, brooding.

I had loved Lily since sometime second year, and she knew that, surely. I had been trying to ask her out for ages, every Hogsmeade trip, every possible event that would be good to have a date for. How could she be so heartless and go out with my best mate? And how could Sirius…

I stopped there. I knew I couldn't blame Sirius, although I was mad at him for not turning Lily down, because he knew how much I loved her; he had known since I had started loving her. He was the first one I had told.

After a while, I knew I'd just be happy because Lily was happy, but right now… Right now I had to endure the pain that had faded to a dull ache in my chest.

I sat there, staring at the wall, until I decided to get to class. As I walked into Transfiguration, Professor McGonigal looked surprised to see me. I was usually the last one in, accompanied by Sirius. This time, however, I was alone, and the first one in.

"Why, Mr. Potter, are you feeling all right?"

"M'fine, Professor," I managed.

"Well, 5 points for Gryffindor for your unusual punctuality, then." I started to grin, but it left my face as quickly as it had come. Lily had walked in. I felt the ache start to throb.

She glanced at me, then quickly looked away. I wondered why Sirius wasn't with her.

Lily's POV:

When I walked into Transfiguration, I was surprised to see James there. He usually came in with Sirius, didn't…

Then I remembered. At breakfast, with the happy, chattering, crowds oblivious to the situation in the Marauders, I had momentarily forgotten that James and Sirius had quarreled.

It felt awful to see him so upset, but then I remembered what a git he was and turned to face the front of the class.

Students filed in, and Sirius, surprisingly, was not late. Professor McGonigal started.

"Mr. Black, you and Mr. Potter both arrived on time today! What a surprise! Ten points to Gryffindor."

I saw James grin. Had he already gotten points for being early?

Sirius thanked McGonigal and came to sit next to me. My heart, miserable as it was, began to beat faster. I scooted into him, breathing in his smell of… well… Sirius.

Then, I felt his foot nudge mine under the desk. My heart beat faster, and I was worried it might break. He nudged my foot again, and this time, I nudged him back. We began playing footsie under the table, my heart beating so loud I was surprised no one else could hear it.

If I hadn't been telling myself to "Calm down, Lily, calm down," I might have started hyperventilating. As it was, I just swallowed every few seconds.

We were so engrossed in our game of footsie that when class started and Professor McGonigal announced, "Everyone up, wands out!" we didn't notice. Only when she said, "Please, Mr. Black, Miss Evans, I will have no public displays of emotion in my class," did we jump up and take out our wands, faces flaming. At least, my face was.

Everyone was giggling, but when I looked around, one face was not laughing. Three guesses who.

James was sitting there, eyes downcast, looking like he was in pain. Pity welled up where I had just felt embarrassment.

After class, I was going to go speak to James, when I heard him talking to Sirius.

"Look, Sirius, if you're going to 'display emotion' in front of me, we're going back to non-speaking terms."

My face flaming again, this time for different reasons, I didn't catch Sirius' reply. And instead of trying to talk to James, I walked past him, glaring, grabbed Sirius' hand, and stormed off.

AN: Sorry to the people who are reading my other story, I'm just caught up in this one… I'll try and get back to it ASAP. Actually, I think I'll go back to that one soon so I can take a quick break from this one and formulate some more ideas. Plus, I want to know what my reviewers think!