Hold On To Me
Rating: Teen for now. I'll let you know when and if it changes.
Disclaimer: I do not own the X-Files or any characters. That would belong to the big man, Chris Carter.
Summary: "I'm not going to risk... losing you." "Mulder, you are not going. I won't let you."
A/N: Right. So this idea came to me when I was watching Orison. I wanted to do a one-shot about what happened when Mulder suggested they leave her apartment. We all know he took her to his apartment and she stayed a couple of nights there. This basically changes the end of season seven, and all of season eight and nine. It was inspired by the song, Going Wrong by Armin van Buuren, also.
She walked into her bedroom with a tan blanket draped over her shoulders. When she realized what she had done, she couldn't stop the chills from taking over her body. Mulder had followed her into the room just after she had closed the window. He knew what she was feeling.
"You wanna pack some things? We can get out of here." She stood there and processed his question. She would have to leave. She couldn't stay here tonight. He moved closer and she turned to open her desk drawer, pulling out her Bible. It felt heavy in her hands and she couldn't bear to look at it. Mulder glanced at it to and shook his head once. "You can't judge yourself." She scoffed softly and turned to sit on her bed, bringing the Bible with her.
"Maybe I don't have to."
"The Bible allows for vengeance."
"But the law doesn't," she said as she looked up at him, her face empty of expression. She tilted her head quickly to challenge him. He saw her pull the trigger, saw her kill a man. He couldn't help but stare at her. Did she honestly think he was going to turn her in? He leaned in closer, his hand coming to rest next to hers on the bed.
"The way I see it, he didn't give you a choice... and my report will reflect that." She closed her eyes and concentrated on just breathing. "Donnie Pfaster would've surely killed again if given the chance."
"He was evil, Mulder. I'm sure about that without a doubt. But there's one thing that I'm not sure of."
"What's that?"
"Who was at work in me? Or what? What made me... what made me pull the trigger."
"You mean if it was God?"
"I mean... what if it wasn't?" He made a bold move and cupped her cheek, forcing her to look at him gently.
"You can't question your faith." He could feel her shiver in his hand. He needed to get them out of there, and quick. "Come on. Get packed," he softly encouraged. She nodded and stood from her bed, leaving her Bible behind. She was careful not to disturb any evidence in the room for the investigators as she packed some clean clothes. She rested her bag on the bed and looked down at what she was wearing. "What's wrong," he asked when he saw she was no longer moving, just staring down at her torn, bloody clothes.
"I need to change," she whispered softly. He nodded and took a few steps for the door, giving her privacy, but stopped when he heard her say his name. He looked back at her to find her almost pleading with her eyes. "Don't leave." He hesitated at the door. "Please." He stood in his place and fixed his eyes on the bed. She took a deep breath and unbuttoned the pajama top, then let it fall from her body. She grabbed a sweater from her bag and pulled it over her head. Through the corner of his eye, he could see her perfect body and fought to remain still. Her pajama bottoms were next and she replaced them with a casual pair of low-cut jeans that nearly hid both of her feet. She didn't waste any time looking for socks. Instead, she grabbed a pair of brown boots, which Mulder had recognized as being a teen trend recently, and slipped them on.
She knew she had more things to pack, but she wasn't going in that bathroom. No force on Earth could get her to go in that room until it had been cleaned out entirely.
"Let's go," she softly whispered, her bag hanging from her hand. Mulder took a step forward and grabbed the bag from her hand. She looked up at him and tried to smile, to let him know that she was okay, but couldn't. Before he opened the door, he framed her face with both of his hands and made her look up at him.
"Scully, I'm here for you. Whatever happens out there, or whatever gets said, I'm defending you a hundred percent. Okay?" She nodded gently and sniffed. "Come here." His arms fell to her sides and he drew her into a gentle, friendly hug. She wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face into his chest. It felt good to have someone's arms around her, especially Mulder's, and to have someone whisper comfort. She felt safe with him, like nothing could harm her while she was in his arms. "Ready," he asked, his chin resting on top of her head softly. She nodded and they pulled away from each other, but she stayed considerably close.
Once her bedroom door opened, she saw the scene in front of her and grabbed Mulder's hand. He squeezed gently to let her know everything was okay. He led them through the hallway, across the kitchen and to the door. The leading detective stopped them before they could make it out of the apartment, a notepad and pen in his hand.
"I'm going to need to have a word with Agent Scully here."
"You can talk to her tomorrow. She needs rest," Mulder immediately fired back, staring down the young detective until he moved out of their way. Scully clung to Mulder once they made it in the hallway and he let out a deep sigh.
The ride to his apartment was quiet. He held her hand the entire way there, up the stairs, and in the elevator. When they made it into his apartment, he set her bag down on his coffee table and she simply stood there, looking around the dark living room. The only form of light, the fish tank, lit up the small corner with colors of green and blue. He turned to her and ran his eyes over her face. She looked tired, sore, and scared. His heart was breaking for her. He nearly lost her- again.
"Why don't you freshen up while I make the bed for you?" Her eyes snapped to his and he gave her a small, comforting smile. She nodded once and turned to his bedroom, she froze when she was engulfed by the darkness. She couldn't find the light switch and she couldn't see anything in front of her. She felt Mulder come up behind her, his arm reaching around her and flicking on the light for her. She didn't move, and neither did he. "You okay," he gently asked, his lips close to her ear. She nodded her head and squeezed his hand. She walked further into his room and came next to a dresser, which she knew held his cotton shirts and boxers. Without asking if she could borrow them, she pulled the drawer and grabbed a black shirt and navy boxers. When she turned around for the bathroom, he was standing in the doorway, watching her with a small smile.
"Is it okay if I-"
"It's fine. Whatever makes you comfortable." He moved away from the doorway and began to strip the old sheets away from his bed. When he noticed she hadn't moved from her spot, he walked over to her and stood in front of her. Their eyes met and he framed her face with both of his hands. "Scully, look at me." She did and he saw tears forming in the corners of her eyes. "I will never let something like that happen to you again. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I lost you again," he whispered. The tears fell from her eyes and rolled down her cheeks, where he wiped them away with his thumb. For a few minutes, they just stood there, holding each other. Finally, Mulder led her to the bathroom and assured her that he would not move from the bedroom until she was done showering.
It didn't take long before she was walking out of the bathroom with damp, straight hair and in his black shirt and navy boxers. She looked beautiful.
The bed was made for her with clean sheets. He was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. He couldn't help but glance over her. Her tiny feet were bare, her legs seemed much longer without the skirt, her tiny chest was engulfed by his black shirt, and her wet hair framed her pale face.
She crawled into his bed and settled on the left side, simply laying there. He began for the door, but her soft voice stopped him.
"Mulder, please don't leave."
"I'll stay if you want me to," he whispered, then sat next to her on the bed. She looked so tiny under his covers. He wanted to crawl next to her, wrap his arms around her, and protect her from everything and everyone. For tonight, though, he just wanted her to relax.
"Here," she whispered and lifted the sheets. He looked at her and she nodded. He stood from the bed and stripped down to his boxers. They were two adults. They could share his bed for tonight. It was just going to be hard for him to not touch her. Their hands brushed together and he gasped at how cold she was.
"Scully, you're freezing." She nodded and sniffed.
"Can't get warm," she muttered, the softness of the sheets and the pillow lulling her to sleep. "Hold me?" Silently, he moved closer to her and wrapped his arms around her waist. She sighed contently when his warm skin met her cold waist. He pulled her closer until her back met his bare chest and she shivered in his arms. "Thank you." He closed his eyes, letting everything process in his head. He was laying in his bed, with Dana Scully in his arms, about to fall asleep. Scully was content, happy in his arms. She felt safe here, cuddled against his chest with his strong, warm arms wrapped around her.
Even now, she wished he would just turn her over and kiss her. It had been a little over a month since their first kiss. It was in the hospital waiting room, as both of them watched the ball drop from Time Square. It was the most romantic thing she had ever experienced with him.
"Scully?" She turned in his arms at her name and was face to face with him, their lips barely touching. Something inside of her made her wrap her arms around his neck and pull his head down, their lips meeting in a soft, passionate kiss. The memory of their first kiss came back to Mulder and it took him a few seconds to respond to her kiss, his mind and heart doing back flips. Her lips were soft and warm against his and the longer they kissed, the more lightheaded he felt. He was careful not to kiss her too hard or roughly, trying to avoid the small cut on her lower lip. When they pulled away, they laid there, staring at each other.
She ran her fingers down his cheek and tucked her head under his chin, snuggling up to his chest. With a pounding heart and light head, he wrapped his arms around her and pressed his lips to the top of her head.
A/N: So that was the first chapter. Chapter names are songs, so look 'em up sometime. Starts at the end of Orison. Review and let me know if I should keep going! Thanks! Love you guys!