He didn't know why he called. It was stupid. Stupid to agree to meet with Daisuke again. It was all that painting's fault. He sat and stared at it until he couldn't help himself. He'd found himself with the phone in hand, dialing.
When he heard Daisuke's voice, he struggled with the juvenile urge to slam the phone back onto the cradle. Instead he responded. It was a stilted conversation no matter how you looked at it. But when he finally hung up he had arranged to meet Daisuke at his next art exhibit.
The meeting itself felt awkward. Daisuke kept staring at him, a slightly glazed look in his eyes. Satoshi tried to shrug it off. By the time they went to dinner he was resisting the urge to hunch his shoulders into a defensive posture.
"Something wrong?"
"Oh, no." Daisuke seemed to mentally shake himself. "I was just looking at your color."
Satoshi stared, frowned.
"Sorry, sorry." Daisuke waved his hands. "Just sometimes when I look at people…" He stopped, staring again.
"Niwa." Satoshi's frown deepened.
"Daiki's red." Daisuke murmured. "Mom's yellow, Dad's blue, Riku's mauve. But you, you're black Satoshi."
Black. Satoshi inwardly shrunk. The shadows were encroaching again, overwhelming him, encouraged by Daisuke's words. Even Daisuke's own brilliance was not holding them back now.
"I don't understand." Daisuke sounded puzzled, hurt even. "Why do you have Dark's color?"
Satoshi froze. Dark's color? He remembered Daisuke's alter ego well, He'd chased him, nearly capturing him several times. But remembrances of Dark also led him to remember his own alter ego. Krad was someone he would rather forget entirely.
"Dark's color?" He asked cautiously.
"Why do you have it?" Daisuke turned the question on Satoshi. "When I don't have a color at all."
"What?" Satoshi stared. No color? Daisuke was always brilliant, always shining. "You're white." It was spoken without thinking.
"White." Daisuke sighed.
White was Krad's color. Satoshi wanted to hit himself, but there was no other way to describe how he saw Daisuke. The color itself wasn't bad, it was simply the connotations the color originally had for him. But now it was different.
"White and black and grey."
"What?"
"Mix white and black and you get grey." Daisuke muttered. "I don't even know why I brought this." He dropped a handmade book on the table.
Satoshi reached for it and began paging through. Wings, paintings upon paintings of wings, white, black, some blending into grey. Paintings of Dark and Krad, fighting. One that looked like the two were embracing. The very last one made him pause. It was of himself, only he had black wings. Satoshi traced it, fingertips lightly skimming over the paper as he followed the brushstrokes.
"I miss him sometimes." Daisuke rambled on, his eyes fixated on the painting. "When I saw you the other day I was surprised." His gaze darted up and met Satoshi's. "Tell me, why do you have Dark's color?"
"Why do you have Krad's?"
Daisuke blinked, pulled his book out from under Satoshi's hands, paging through his art. "I don't." He stopped at a painting Satoshi had passed. Feathers, white and black vanishing off the edge of the page. In the background, lightly rendered in pencil was a self portrait.
No sound.
Satoshi glanced at Daisuke. "I don't know what you're so upset about. Color or no color you have a great life."
"I know." Daisuke shut the book carefully. "But, sometimes I miss Dark." He propped his elbows on the table. "It just really surprised me when I saw you had Dark's color. It's like finding the last piece of the puzzle you thought you'd lost forever."
"Hmm." Satoshi folded his hands. "Black and white make grey."
"Huh?"
"Maybe you shouldn't expect everything to go on like it did. You've mixed your colors now you have to paint with what you've got."
"I guess so." Daisuke laughed. "Look at me, getting all nostalgic." He stifled a yawn. "I feel lots better, thanks Satoshi. I don't know if it's because you have Dark's color now or if it's just because you're one of the few people who can really understand what I'm going through, but I really appreciate it either way."
"What about Rika?" Satoshi cursed his tongue. "Doesn't she understand?"
"I can't really talk about it with her." Daisuke confessed. "I think she'd try to understand, but it wouldn't be the same." He glanced at his watch. "Boy it's late. I've gotta get going." He stood up, reached for his book and then paused. "Satoshi, I wonder if you could do me a favor and keep this for me, just for now."
Satoshi took the book. "Sure."
"Thanks, see you later then."
Satoshi watched him go, gripping the book tightly as he watched Daisuke walk away yet again. Still, somehow the shadows didn't seem so ominous this time. "Black and white and grey." Perhaps it wasn't what he hoped for, but it was more then he could've dreamed of.
Having Dark's color, well, that wasn't so bad.
Black wings filled a space in Daisuke's heart, now they stretched out in a thin line, connecting him to Satoshi. Perhaps it wasn't what Satoshi had hoped for but it was certainly more then he'd ever thought possible. "Black and white make grey. So maybe, just maybe."
Maybe someday.
Just maybe.
Finis