Umm…. I forgot to mention what's happening, didn't I? Right, well Renesme was never born, Johanna sort of takes her place ad Jake's girl. Bella is vampire (you know, if you read the first chapter that's slightly obvious…) and… oh yeah. I don't own anyone. Except for the Masen girls and Jedd. Oh and Jasmine. (haha Jas I own you!) Yeah. Sorry it's been ages, I'm just gonna go now… ENJOY!
Previously on Meet the Masens: "JAC??"
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"Will! It's been so long!" "Yeah… it's been, what, 200 years now? Bloody hell luv. You don't look a day older…. Wait," realisation dawned on Spike's face. "you don't look a day older. What face-cream are you using, luv? I think I should try some…" "No face-cream, you pratt. More like, vampire cream. Except it's not cream, it's in my veins, flowing through my body." Jac wasn't angry. On the contrary, she was smiling, her eyes fixed on Spike's hair. "What?" Spike asked. "What's wrong with my hair." "Nothing. It just looks so… cocky." Jac started laughing, "I mean, how long do you spend on that thing, an hour?" she continued to laugh and point at Spike's hair. "Actually, it's more like two hours. On good days." Xander appeared next to them. Jac was in hysterics. Xander was laughing too. Suddenly, Willow was there. "What's so funny?" she asked. "His… hair…" Jac managed to gasp out. Willow giggled. "That is kinda funny…" And then Willow was laughing too. "What is the meaning of this?" Giles was behind them, his eyebrows raised. Automatically Willow and Xander stopped laughing. Jac, however, couldn't seem to stop.
"What… Who are you?" Giles stared at Jac who was still giggling. "Jac." She said. "Are you a friend of Spike?" "Spike? Who's Spike?" "Um, the guy you've been talking to for the last 10 minutes?" "Spike? You mean Will is…. Spike?" and Jac went on another laughing marathon. Xander couldn't help chuckling, Willow had her mouth covered and her eyes closed. Even Giles cracked a smile. But Spike wasn't laughing. "What? It's tough. Tougher than Will anyway." Spike added after he saw Jac open her mouth. "No, Will, Spike is a poofy name. As in 'only pooftas call themselves Spike.'" "Yeah, well, you can talk, JASMINE." Xander, regaining his composure, turned to Spike. "Dude, she's allowed to have a soft name. She's a girl." "Wait, you're name is Jasmine?" Willow asked Jac. "Yeah… Why?" "That's an awesome name." "What's you're name? Okay, so I know Will, I mean Spike, but how about the rest of you?" "I'm Xander. This is Willow, Giles, and… well… usually we have Buffy with us, but… Spike, where is Buffy?" Xander looked at Spike. "Oh my God, you didn't suck her blood and leave her lifeless body in a gutter, did you?" "No I did not kill your precious Buffy, she ran off with some werewolf and his girlfriend…" "Aww… poor Spike…" Jasmine ran over and gave him a hug. "Umm… I hate to spoil your precious moment, but the clouds are clearing up." "And…" "And you're a vampire. Sun plus vampire equals NOT GOOD." Spike widened his eyes. "Aah… crud."
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"Alice… why are you pulling down Bella's dress?" Carlisle raised one of his eyebrows. Bella was amazingly embarrassed. Everyone could see her bra. Although she didn't really need one. She just wore it out of habit. Still, she was embarrassed. She would have blushed if she could. "Carlisle… I can seriously explain…" Alice was biting her lip, staring at the huge audience in front of them. "Whoah… incest… Seriously, I think I read a book about that once, except it was brother and sister, and everyone was all like GROSS coz, like, it's not right and I was like, well, I was like…" Cassie trailed off after receiving a death stare from Lucy. "Actually it's not incest." Edward looked like someone had just slapped him. "They're not related. Technically." Silence. "Yeah but it's still gross." Lucy bitch-slapped Cassie. "Cassie! Silencio!" "Hey! That's not nice!" Castiel glared at Lucy. "You'd better apologise, mutant!" "Who are you calling 'mutant', leech?" Ryan stepped in front of Lucy. "GUYS!" Fleur yelled. "Hello? Hasn't anyone noticed the CRISIS SITUATION happening at the moment? You should be ashamed of yourselves!" Cassie and Lucy looked away. "Now, kiss and make-up." Lucy shuffled towards Cassie. Cassie opened up her arms and gave Lucy a hug. "Thanks Fleur." Monique said. Paige was smiling. The Cullens were giving the Masens a strange look. "Umm… Family meeting." Carlisle whispered. The Cullens, including Alice and Bella, walked out of the bathroom in silence. The Masens didn't even realise they were gone, because they were all hugging and smiling.
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"Carlisle, I was just fixing up Bella's dress!" Alice said once they got into the kitchen. "I know Alice. That's not why we're here…" Edward looked a bit better know. "That explains… a lot." "Edward, didn't you know? I mean, you can still read minds, right?" "Yes… Well, I think I can. But something in that bathroom stopped me. There was… I can't explain. It was superhuman. Not vampire," he added, seeing Emmett's eyebrows raise and hearing his thought, "but like, mutant." "Exactly." Carlisle said. "Lucy and Ryan are mutants." "Like, X-Men mutants? Or like, evil, mutated at birth typed mutants…" Emmett was furrowing his eyebrows and Rosalie was holding his hand. "Like X-Men mutants." Jasper said. He'd been quiet since he saw Alice and Bella… and he was still avoiding looking at Alice. "Jasper…" Alice looked at him. He looked up and met her gaze. "Jasper. Ew. Look, just go and… wait. No, Jasper that's just GROSS! Keep your thoughts to yourself, and get a room!" Jasper looked shocked. "Sorry Edward." He said, and pulling Alice along, he went upstairs. "Right." Carlisle said. "Meeting dismissed." Esme whispered something in Carlisle's ear. He smiled. "No dear, I'm sure that the mutants won't go mad and burn down the house…" Bella and Edward drifted out of the room, and into Edward's bedroom. Bella sat down. "What… How are you Edward?" "It's a bit of a strange time to be making small talk, don't you think?" he smiled, but Bella could tell it was fake. "No, I mean, how are you. About your sister, and the Masens and… everything." Edward sat down next to Bella. She rested her head on his shoulder. "I… I didn't think I had a sister. Apparently, she was an accident. My parents gave her away to an orphanage. They already had me. They didn't need another child to look after. When she was sixteen… well I guess she followed in her big brother's footsteps. She got turned." Bella turned Edward's face to look at her. "Hey. It's not like you can do anything." "Yeah. I know." Bella kissed Edward. "Anyway, I guess I'd better go see if Esme wants help with dinner." "Bella, we don't eat." Edward looked at her gently, as though she was dumb. "I know. But it's Sunday. Jacob will be coming over for a BBQ, and I can't wait to meet this new 'Johanna' he keeps going on about."