Author's Notes: Thanks go to Peggy (Medieval Mystic: USER ID: 796384) for doing such a wonderful job beta'ing.
Chapter Ten: Certainty
When I awoke the following morning and went down to the common room before breakfast, the whole of
Ravenclaw tower seemed to be buzzing with excitement about that day's Quidditch tryouts.
Already, Michelle, Heather and Stephanie were gathered in seats near the fire place; Michelle in her Quidditch robes, and Stephanie – much to my amusement – dressed far more fancily than she normally would for a weekend, and with her hair perfectly styled; no doubt for Sirius' benefit.
"Morning, Jenn," they chorused, as I took the last available seat beside them.
"How did things with Remus go last night?" Heather inquired. When I'd arrived back at my dormitory the previous evening, I felt too tired and confused to discuss the party with my friends, and had said nothing more than 'good night' to them before going to bed.
"Erm... it was okay...I guess," I replied hesitantly. I still hadn't worked out in my head what exactly had happened between Remus and I at Professor Slughorn's party, so until I had things straight in my own mind, I wasn't about to discuss it with my friends.
However, Stephanie seemed to have other ideas. Before I got a chance to change the subject, she asked, "So, what did Remus think of the robes I lent you?"
"He said they were nice."
"Well, that's a start I suppose. But he must have said something else. What else did the two of you talk about all evening?"
"Oh, you know, the usual stuff. School, our home-life, what we got up to during the holidays, our plans for Christmas."
"Go on," Stephanie prompted. "Did he make any suggestions that he'd like to be more than friends? Perhaps inviting you to go to the next Hogsmeade weekend with him?"
"No, not really. Though we did agree to meet up later today at the try-outs," I returned, trying to sound positive, though inside I was beginning to feel more and more certain that Remus and I would never be more than friends. After all, we hadn't really discussed anything we hadn't done before in class a million times already. Additionally, much to my disappointment, aside from confirming we'd see each other at the Quidditch try-outs, Remus hadn't mentioned us spending any more time together.
"Oh well, there's always today," Heather reassured me. "Perhaps he's just working up the courage to ask you out."
"Yeah, maybe," I replied half-heartedly, believing that to be far from true.
Thankfully, I wasn't left with any time to dwell on my thoughts further, as Michelle suggested we should make our way down to the Great Hall for breakfast; reminding us all that the Ravenclaw team's try-outs were to be the first of the day.
For the majority of breakfast, I said and ate little, all the while keeping an eye on the doorway for Remus to arrive. Likewise, Stephanie was also watching the entranceway, no doubt hoping to see Sirius.
However, when none of the Marauders had arrived, and the rest of the hopefuls trying out for the Ravenclaw team began departing, Michelle suggested that maybe we should get going. Stephanie and I gave one last sweeping glance around the Great Hall, and then followed Michelle and Heather as they crossed the Entrance Hall, left the castle and made their way down to the Quidditch pitch.
When we arrived at the pitch, we wished Michelle the best of luck, and then she headed into the dressing room as the remaining three of us made out way over to the spectator stands. Already, the stadium was filling up with students from all years and houses to support their respective teams, as well as a fair few teachers, too. Near the front of the seating area, I spotted Professor Trimble chatting to Professor Flitwick, and was pleased to notice that she - like him - was wearing a Ravenclaw scarf.
Finally, the students hoping to get a place on the Ravenclaw team came out of the dressing room, accompanied by the House Captain, Philip Oliver. Heather, Stephanie and I found Michelle in the crowd of students, and we all waved at her, giving out friend reassuring grins and 'thumbs up'. Michelle smiled back, though she looked decidedly nervous and even a little green with worry.
"You'll be just fine," Stephanie called to her over the quickly increasing gathering of people.
Soon enough, the actual try-outs began, and I found myself slightly bored as I watched a bunch of first years, who could hardly stay on their brooms, stumble around the pitch. However, Philip seemed more than capable of doing his job, and soon enough all the weakest applicants had been weeded out.
Once the last of the stragglers had left the pitch – most of them joining their house-mates in the spectator stands – the real try-outs began. Every applicant was then divided into groups according to which position they were trying out for, and I noticed with amusement that only four other people - aside from Michelle - were applying for the role of Chasers; meaning that all but two of them were guaranteed a spot on the team.
After everyone had done a lap around the pitch to warm up, the more organized trials began. The teams took it in turns to showcase their respective skills; those trying out for the position of Seeker had to fly backwards and forwards across the pitch trying to spot and catch small golf balls that the other applicants were throwing into the air, those hoping to get a spot as one of the two Beaters had to fend of a round of Bludgers aimed at them by the others trying out for the team, and the perspective Chasers took it in turns to shoot goals through the three scoring hoops, which were being defended by Philip in his usual role as the team's Keeper.
Finally, all the trials came to an end, and then Philip took some time away from the pitch alone to think about everything he'd seen and decide who would be the best players for the team.
During that time, Michelle made her way over to where Stephanie, Heather and I were sitting, and asked us all how we thought she'd got on.
"You were great," I told her honestly. "Philip would be insane not to pick you for the team."
"Yeah, you preformed better and scored more goals than anyone else who tried out," added Heather.
"But don't you think my fight with Philip last year will stand against me?" Michelle questioned with uncertainty. "What if he takes my outburst as an indication I'm unreliable?"
"Philip isn't one to hold grudges," Stephanie pointed out. "And he isn't going to let a silly argument from last year stop him from choosing the best players."
"I guess we'll just have to wait and see about that," Michelle muttered to herself more than the three of us.
As it turned out, Michelle didn't have to wait long at all to hear Philip's decision. A few moments after she'd finally stopped pacing and took a seat next to Heather, Philip returned to the pitch and called all the applicants to him.
"Great try-outs this year, everyone," he called to those gathered around him, though he spoke loud enough that the whole stadium could hear him. "I was very impressed with the caliber of all the applicants. It was a tough decision working out who should and shouldn't make the team. However, I've finally come to a decision and one which I think will help Ravenclaw to win the inter-house Quidditch Cup this year. Therefore, let me announce the new Ravenclaw team; in the position of Seeker will be third year, Rebbecca Williams, the two Beaters will be sixth year Jason Medley and fifth year David Fellows and finally, the three Chasers will be the two Seventh year, Elizabeth Fellows and Jayne Smythe, and Sixth year, Michelle Derby."
A round of applause broke out from the stands, as everyone congratulated the new team members, and I heard Stephanie's voice calling above the cheers and clapping.
"Well done, Michelle!!"
When the applause and cheering finally died down, the now selected team members gathered around Philip to arrange when the first practice would be held, before the group broke up and made their way over to the seating area and their friends.
"Congratulations," I told Michelle as she took a seat besides Heather, Stephanie and I.
"Yeah, well done," Heather added. "Didn't we tell you you'd be just fine?"
"Okay, you guys were right," Michelle conceded with a grin.
After more wishes of congratulations and inquiries into when training would begin by all three of us, Michelle asked the question that was on all of our minds, "So, when are we heading to the Great Hall for lunch? I'm starving!"
Stephanie laughed, then cast a cautious glance back at them Quidditch pitch. "Well, I was kind of hoping we could stick around for the Gryffindor try-outs too," she confessed sheepishly.
"Are you honestly telling me seeing Sirius Black in his Quidditch robes is more important than getting something to eat?" teased Heather.
"Well, I doubt they'll be doing anything this close to lunch-time," I pointed out in defense of my friend, before adding, "Besides, I wanted to watch the Gryffindor try-outs too; I was hoping to see Remus."
"Merlin, you two are as bad as each other with your obsession with the Marauders," Michelle joked.
"So, you're telling me if James, Sirius or Remus asked you to go to Hogsmeade with them, you'd say no?" challenged Stephanie.
"Actually, yes I would," insisted Michelle. "Lily and James obviously have a thing for each other, you'd hex me into next week if I went out with Sirius and I don't think Jenn would appreciate me going out with Remus."
"And what about Peter?" Heather inquired with a slight smirk.
While the fourth member of the Marauders, Peter Pettigrew, was a nice enough boy, he didn't gain the same attention from girls as his three friends did. He was pleasant enough, just a little shy and often jumpy.
"That's a bit mean, isn't it?" I protested. "Peter isn't that bad."
"No, he isn't," Stephanie agreed. "He just doesn't compare to Sirius."
"Does anyone in your eyes, though?" Michelle teased, as we made our way across the Quidditch pitch and back the the castle for lunch.
Lunch at the Ravenclaw table was a very noisy affair. Everyone was in hight spirits thanks to having a Quidditch team for the year finalized, and I did wonder how anyone found the time to actually eat between all the chatter and cheering.
The only two people who seemed unusually quiet were Stephanie and myself, as we were both still watching the Great Hall for any sign of the Marauders. In fact, Stephanie actually seemed a little tense; every few seconds, her head whipped around to look at the entrance way.
"Relax," I whispered in her ear. "There's no way Sirius and the others will miss the try-outs. They're probably just doing what they're known for; getting into mischief."
"Yeah, you're right," Stephanie agreed, turning back to her untouched ham sandwich.
Thankfully, all uncertainty regarding the whereabout of the four Hogwarts troublemakers was soon cleared up when James and Sirius strutted into the Hall – wearing the Quidditch robes – closely followed by Remus and Peter.
At the sight of Remus, dressed in casual, weekend robes, my heart fluttered a little and my legs felt weak. I wanted nothing more than to rush over to him and ask how his morning had been. However, I had to satisfy myself with merely waving and grinning at him. Though when Remus returned the gesture with a wave of his own and a smile, my heart all but stopped.
The appearance of the Marauders seemed to hurry everyone into activity, and Stephanie quickly at her sandwich as I gulped down my now barely warm tomato soup.
Once the four of us had finished eating, we left the Great Hall and hurried back down to the Quidditch pitch so that we could find good seats to watch the try-outs from.
Finding Lily sitting on the third row benches with a group of her friends, Michelle, Heather, Stephanie and I decided to join them.
"Hi," Lily greeted. "Did you all have a good morning? How did the try-outs go, Michelle?"
"They went great, thanks for asking," Michelle replied. "I made Chaser."
"Congratulations," Lily returned, embracing Michelle, before the group of us began chatting.
We were all just discussing out plans for the forthcoming Hogsmeade weekend, when Stephanie stopped speaking mid sentence.
"What's the matter?" I inquired.
"Yeah, you look like you've seen a Dementor or something," Lily added with concern.
"Si... Si... Sirius..." Stephanie stuttered, her eyes transfixed on the Quidditch pitch, where Sirius was on his broom racing James backwards and forwards.
"Show offs," Lily muttered under her breath.
The rest of us burst out laughing at the reaction to something as simple as Sirius flying had elicited in Stephanie, as she continued to watch his every move in awe.
"You know, he does that a lot, it's nothing special really," an amused voice behind us suddenly commented.
I wiped the tears of laughter from my eyes, and turned around to see Remus grinning at me, Peter sitting beside him.
"Hey, Remus," I greeted. "How was your morning?"
Suddenly, Remus looked very uncomfortable and turned his head away.
"We got detention from Filch for throwing Dungbombs at a group of Slytherin first years," Peter confessed sheepishly.
"Let me guess, James and Sirius' idea?" Lily commented waspishly. "You'd think they'd have grown out of that by now, and you Remus, should know better as a Prefect."
"Oh, come on, Lils, it's only the Slytherins," her friend, Mary, defended.
"That's still no excuse," Lily muttered with a pout on her face, before turning back around.
"But, aside from getting detention, you had a good morning?" I asked both of them, though directing my question more at Remus.
However, he remained silent, and it was Peter who replied again.
"Yes thanks, Jenn. How about you? How did the Ravenclaw try-outs go?"
"Really well, thanks. Michelle made Chaser," I answered with a smile. "So, how come you're not trying out for the Gryffindor team?"
Peter blushed bright red, and then whispered, "I'm not really good at flying, though James and Sirius have been trying to teach me."
"Don't worry," I reassured him, with a kindly smile. "I can't fly very well either."
I was just about to try and start up another conversation with Remus when James – who was Gryffindor's team captain for the second year running – called all the applicants to him.
Quickly enough, the trials got underway and people were flying everywhere. However, I – unlike Stephanie, who couldn't take her eyes off Sirius – wasn't actually paying that much attention to the action on the pitch.
I was still trying to get some sort of response out of Remus, though anything I asked him, he answered with one or two words. Finally, I got tired of what felt like talking to myself, and turned to join the conversation of my friends, who were discussing who was the better Seeker; a Seventh year boy called Jamie Price or a Fifth year girl named Annabelle Newman.
"Well, Annabelle seems to have keener eyesight, but Jamie's reaction time is quicker," Michelle stated critically, speaking as the only one amongst us with any Quidditch expertise.
At last, the try-outs came to an end, and James stepped forwards to announce the new Gryffindor team for the year. As expected, he'd made himself one of the Chasers, along with Fifth year Debora Mathews and Seventh year John Biggerstaff. Unsurprisingly, Sirius was one of the Beaters and Jordan Denver was the other. Jamie beat Annabelle for the position of Seeker, and a burley Fifth year named Michael Johnson was announced as the new Keeper for the team.
"Oh, now he'll be a tricky one to get goals past," Michelle commented with a slight grimace.
"Yeah, but you'll have no problem getting the Quaffle from James, as he'll be too busy making sure his hair looks good," Lily mocked.
"What's happened to your sense of team spirit, Lily?" Peter asked with astonishment.
"It flew out the window when James was made captain last year."
At this point, none of us could hold back our laughter, and we all joined in as Lily giggled over the supposed amount of time it took James to style his hair every morning.
"I still think she likes him secretly, though," Mary whispered in my ear.
I grinned then nodded in agreement.
By the time the Gryffindor team had arranged their first practice and had made their way over to the spectator stands, the comments about James' hair had died down, and he missed Remus confessing to us that James had once tried to Transfigure his hair so that it always appeared windswept.
"Congratulations," Peter called to Sirius and James as they came to sit by us.
"Yeah, well done, Sirius. You flew wonderfully," Stephanie added, completely ignoring the fact James was there too.
"Thanks, Steph," Sirius replied, sitting down next to her and casually slinging his arm around her shoulder.
"What did you think, Lily?" James asked, ruffling his fingers through his already messed up hair.
"I think, if you keep touching your hair like that, it's all going to fall out, Potter," she retorted with a smirk.
Instantly, James' arms slammed down by his sides, and he looked away sheepishly, as everyone laughed.
After a short while, Sirius turned to Remus and Peter, asking, "Moony, Wormtail, you'll join Prongs and I celebrating out positions on the Quidditch team in the common room, won't you?"
"Of course," Peter answered with a delighted squeak.
"Well, actually, I was going to ask Jenn to take a walk around the lake with me," Remus confessed with a sheepish smile. "But I'll join you later."
Inside, my heart was doing somersaults at Remus' confession. However, when I opened my mouth to speak, the exact opposite response came out. "Honestly, Remus, if you'd prefer to go and celebrate with your friends, I don't mind. We can talk in class or something."
James and Sirius exchanged a smirk as Remus turned bright red.
"Actually, there was something I wanted to talk to you about," Remus said finally. "Though, if you're busy, I understand."
"No, I'm not busy at all and I'd love to take a walk with you," I blurted out before I could stop myself.
Michelle, Stephanie, Heather, Mary and Lily all giggled, while once again James and Sirius smirked, and I wished the ground would open up and swallow me whole.
"Shall we then?" Remus suggested offering me his hand.
I took his hand, and pulled myself up off of the bench, as my heart raced and my legs felt weak.
What in the name of Merlin could Remus want to talk to me about alone?
In slightly tense silence, Remus and I crossed the Quidditch pitch and made our way to the lake; still hand in hand.
As we reached the black waters which housed the giant squid, we took a seat under the large oak tree that grew on the lake's bank. Then we looked at each other in awkward silence.
Finally, Remus cleared his throat and said, "Listen, Jenn, about Slughorn's party last night, I need to explain something."
"Go on," I prompted, just knowing he was about to say it'd been a mistake him asking me to go.
"Well, if I seemed a little quiet and distant, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be," he apologized.
"Honestly, it's okay," I insisted.
"No, it isn't. Let me explain. When I asked you to come to Slughorn's party with me, it was because I wanted to spend some time with you outside of class. Then, when you showed up wearing those robes, I wondered if I'd made a mistake."
"What? I don't understand. How could me borrowing Stephanie's robes make you think you'd made a mistake?"
"You looked so different, and it confused me. I'm use to the Jenn who wears her hair in a bun that gradually becomes more messy as the day goes on. I'm use to the Jenn who's glasses slip down her nose when she's working. I'm use to the Jenn who is so occupied with school work that she doesn't care how she looks, when in reality, she always looks beautiful."
Remus' last few words didn't sink in, as the realization of what had been wrong finally hit me. Remus didn't like me because of some fancy robes I'd borrowed; Remus liked me because I was myself. Then, when I changed, so had his feelings for me, and he had begun to wonder if asking me to go to Professor Slughorn's party had been a mistake.
Oh, what a fool I was. I'd listen to Stephanie's advice that guys are only interested in girls who look like magazine models, when all along, a guy like Remus didn't care about those things at all.
Then, as the waves of embarrassment washed over me, I finally realized what Remus had just said.
"You... you... you think I'm beautiful?" I stuttered in amazement.
"Yes," Remus confirmed with a sheepish grin. "And clever, and kind and funny too. That's why I like spending time with you, and that's why I invited you to Slughorn's party with me and to watch the Quidditch try-outs with me. It's also the reason why I was hoping you'd come to Hogsmeade with me on the next visit."
"I'd be delighted to," I told him honestly, as I looked up and allowed myself a sheepish smile.
"Oh, thank Merlin you said yes," Remus returned nervously, as he took my hand in his. "I was worried that after last night, you might think I don't like you."
"Well, actually, I did," I confessed, feeling my face flush.
"I'm sorry I made you think that. Honestly, that couldn't be further from the truth. I like you; I like you a lot," Remus assured me.
Then taking me completely by surprise, I felt his lips brush against my own.
Tingles ran through my body from the contact of Remus' lips pressed against my own, I didn't want this moment to end. However, it did, as Remus gently pulled away. I slowly opened my eyes and brushed my lips softly against his cheek. The feel of Remus' slight stubble against my lips made me feel as though the air was charged with electricity and my whole body felt alight with fire. Then, letting out a small sigh of pleasure, I wrapped my arms around Remus waist and we snuggled together against the large trunk of the oak, watching as the giant squid's tentacles lazily flicked across the surface of the lake.
To be continued....