Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds

A/N: Thank you to all of those who reviewed this and put in on your alerts. Also, thank you to the wonderful tearbos for her wonderful suggestions.

WARNING: Still really screwed up. Still full of slashiness, and angst, and bad stuff.

SLASH ALERT, SLASH ALERT

There is some actual slash in this chapter! Beware, for there shall be boy-kissing and some descriptions of sex (no actual sex) Yay, Morgan/Reid time!

__________________________________________________

Morgan couldn't answer that question, since he wasn't entirely sure himself. In truth, he didn't want to hurt Reid, but he had, and he still couldn't reason why. Therefore, all he could do was hold Reid, rubbing his back soothingly, despite the fact the contact brought back his guilt, as if simply touching Reid to comfort him was too much of an invasion on Reid's personal space. Reid slowly relaxed, but didn't relinquish his hold on Morgan's shirt. Morgan suddenly realized he was blubbering apologies and words of comfort to Reid, telling him how beautiful and perfect he was, and how he wished he had treated him better. The stream of unconsciously uttered words slowed to a stop once he realized he was talking.

"Feel better?" Reid muttered, pulling back and smiling slightly. Morgan blinked, and stared at him for a minute. He couldn't remember half of what he had said, but he did feel as if he had had a huge weight lifted from his shoulders. He took a deep breath before he answered.

"Yeah, I do."

Reid's smile grew, and he buried his face in Morgan's shoulder again, humming contentedly. He spoke softly, his voice muffled by Morgan's shoulder. "Me too." Reid brought his legs up onto the couch, so they were on the other side of Morgan's lap, and then he shifted so he was comfortably curled up against Morgan's chest. For a moment, Morgan simply marveled upon Reid's ability to comfortably arrange all of his long limbs into such a small area. Morgan was brought out of his thoughts when Reid spoke up again, turning his head slightly so his voice was no longer muffled by Morgan's shoulder. "Maybe we should talk about…things, so we don't have another misunderstanding."

"Yeah, you're probably right," Morgan admitted, not at all excited to have this conversation, even though he knew it was for the best. He promised himself that if he ever hurt Reid again, he'd quit the BAU and move to Alaska and begin hunting moose.

"Okay…well, I guess as long as you don't get mad, I'll answer any…any questions you have." Reid was unconsciously twisting at the fabric of Morgan's shirt, his fingers twitching nervously, keeping his head down. Morgan ran a hand over Reid's hair, taking a deep breath.

"I guess the first thing I want to know is if you're even attracted to men." The thought hadn't even occurred to him until after the night at the bar.

Reid simply nodded, tensing slightly, as if afraid of Morgan's reaction. Morgan just hugged him tighter, hoping to give him a sense of acceptance.

"Was it just men…or women too?"

"Just men," Reid muttered.

"Okay, then what…how far did things go?"

Reid moved away. He shifted nervously, tucking his hair behind his hair and biting his lip before pulling his knees to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. "I-I pretty much let them do whatever they wanted, as long as they wore protection, and didn't mark me up where people would see…It usually wasn't too…too rough."

"You let them hurt you?" Morgan tried to keep calm, but his tone was sharper than he'd meant it to be, and he could tell from the way Reid's shoulders hunched that he'd come off slightly too aggressive.

"Y-yeah…sometimes. I got used to it after awhile..."

"Is that why you didn't call the cops on me?" Morgan asked, more gently now. Reid shook his head, unconsciously moving his fingertips to his own forearms. Morgan felt guilt settle heavily in his stomach, making him cringe slightly. Morgan turned to Reid, and gently pulled back his shirt sleeve, revealing dark, week-old bruises. As the fabric was pushed over the purpled skin, Reid flinched slightly, but settled down once Morgan had pushed his sleeve all the way to his elbow. Morgan must have stared for too long, because Reid took a slow, shuddering breath, pulling his sleeves back down. He then began talking, looking at the ground as he went into 'lecture mode'.

"After thinking about it a little, I figured you had just had what is referred to as an 'amygdala hijack'. You were presented with material that was emotionally disturbing or threatening, so your amygdala probably took over your neocortex, which is the thinking center of the brain, which would have made-"

"Whoa, Reid, I get it...but that isn't an excuse for what I did."

"Well…no, but it is a way to logically explain your actions…but I think we're digressing. I'm sure you still have more questions." Reid spoke slowly, staring vacantly at his knees.

Morgan nodded, rubbing a hand over his face. "Yeah, I do…I just…I don't know how bad they hurt you." Reid frowned slightly, looking at Morgan and biting his lips together while he thought before answering.

"I never ended up in the hospital. At worst they would tie me up and hit me, but it usually wasn't…usually it was just intercourse." Morgan noticed that Reid had started shaking, his arms going tighter around his knees. Morgan knew it was hard for Reid to talk about these things, but he still had questions, and he wanted to get this conversation done with, as soon as possible.

"Reid, had you been sexually active, before all of this?" Reid let out a funny laugh, looking over at Morgan.

"'Active' is not the word I would use. I hadn't…" Reid blushed, looking away again before continuing in a shaky voice. "I hadn't actually been…penetrated, but I had had sexual experiences before." There was a moment of tense silence before Morgan stood up.

"I think…I think I've heard enough. It's kind of late, so I'll make a quick supper, okay kid?" Reid nodded, so Morgan went into the kitchen, and cooked some TV dinners before bringing them out to the living room. After they had eaten, Reid went to take a shower, leaving Morgan to wander around the house, too keyed up to sleep. He ended up leaning against the outside of the bathroom door, listening to the sound of running water mixing with soft sniffles. Hearing the water turn off, Morgan quickly walked away from the door, going into his bedroom, taking off his shirt, and changing into a pair of sweatpants before lying down in bed, staring at the ceiling.

It was only a couple minutes later that he heard soft footsteps in the hall way, followed by Reid appearing in his doorway, wearing a pair of blue plaid pajama pants, and a mismatched, orange button down pajama top that was a couple sizes too big for him. Morgan sat up, and noticed in the dim light coming in from his window that Reid's eyes were red and puffy.

"Everything okay, kid?" Morgan asked gently. Reid looked down at the floor, twisting his hands together nervously for a few moments before answering in a small, choked voice.

"No."

Morgan felt his heart twist painfully. He scooted over on the bed, pulling the covers back. "Why don't you come over here and talk to me about it," he suggested. Reid hesitated for a moment before walking forward, crawling on the bed next to Morgan, lying down so he was facing him. Gently, Morgan draped the covers over Reid's shoulder, and then pulled him close, stroking his still-damp hair. Reid whimpered slightly, closing his eyes tightly and biting his lip before letting out a small dry sob, trying to hide his face in the pillow.

"Come on Spencer, talk to me…" Morgan whispered, cupping Reid's chin in his hand, and tilting his head upward. Reid opened his eyes and looked at Morgan, swallowing thickly.

"I didn't want to do it, Morgan…I didn't want to do any of it…and now I just can't stop thinking about all the things that happened…please…I just want to forget." The sound of Reid's voice, hoarse and broken, tore at Morgan's heart in all of the wrong places. Morgan pulled Reid's too-thin body close, hugging him tightly.

"I'm so sorry, Reid…I'm sorry you felt like you had to go through that alone…I wish I would've known sooner, I wish I could've stopped it all, Pretty Boy…but it's over now, and I won't ever let anyone else hurt you, not even me, I fucking swear, Spencer, I won't let anyone hurt you again, not if I can help it." Morgan was babbling again, but he didn't care, all he wanted to do was help. Reid buried his face in Morgan's chest as Morgan talked, pressing his cheek against Morgan's skin. After a little while, Morgan felt warm tears falling onto his skin, and he stopped talking, simply running his hand over Reid's hair soothingly. When Reid spoke, he could feel Reid's lips moving against his chest.

"Thank you for saying that," Reid whispered, his voice so quiet Morgan almost didn't hear him.

"I mean it, Reid, every word." Morgan felt his heart stop when Reid's tongue flicked out to wet his lips, a whisper against his skin.

"What about what you said earlier, in the living room?" Reid sounded hesitant to ask, and Morgan couldn't really remember everything he had said earlier, but he didn't hesitate before answering.

"I meant it."

Reid pulled back, smiling slightly, his face blotchy, and his eyes still bright with tears, but he looked genuinely happy. "I don't believe you, but it is still sweet that you said all that." Morgan frowned, trying to remember exactly what he had said that Reid would doubt, but Reid shook his head slightly, still smiling. "You don't remember a word of what you said, do you?" Reid asked, sounding amused.

"I remember….parts."

Reid chuckled, and then closed his eyes, making a sleepy sound. "Okay," he muttered, his body relaxing.

"Hey, wait a minute! What did I say?" Morgan asked, praying he hadn't said anything too revealing.

"Shhh…I'm sleeping," Reid muttered, rolling over so his back was to Morgan. Letting out a frustrated sight, Morgan wrapped an arm around Reid's waist, pulling him closer so his chest was against Reid's back.

"No, you're not sleeping. Tell me what I said."

"Mmmnnn…You told me I'm the most beautiful man on earth, for one. Now be quiet, I'm trying to get to sleep before you kick me out of your bed."

Morgan felt his face heat up, and he started to remove his arm from Reid's waist, but then Reid grabbed his wrist gently, and pulled Morgan's arm back around his waist before asking, in a hushed voice, "Did you mean it?"

"I thought you wanted me to be quiet," Morgan murmured, nuzzling Reid's damp hair at the base of his neck. Reid went momentarily stiff before relaxing again.

"I changed my mind. I want to know if you meant it, and…that other stuff you said."

"What else did I say?"

"You said you loved me, that you didn't want anyone else to ever touch me."

Morgan sucked in a breath. God, had he really said that? For a moment he considered lying to Reid, and telling him it had been some sort of an 'amygdala hijack' or whatever the hell that was, he didn't know. After a moment, however, he nodded against Reid's neck.

"Yeah, I meant it."

Reid shifted, and Morgan loosened his hold around Reid's waist, which had tightened with his admission. Reid rolled over to face him again, looking curious.

"Are you lying to me?" Reid whispered, sounding confused.

"Why would I lie about something like that?" Morgan asked. Reid bit his lip, looking away.

"I can think of a couple reasons," Reid muttered, refusing to look Morgan in the eye.

"Hey, I'm not asking for anything, really I'm not…it's just the truth, Pretty Boy. I care about you, and I love you, and I'm so, so sorry that I hurt you, but I'll never hurt you again, I promise." Morgan spoke slowly, running his fingers through Reid's hair, over the side of his face, and then down along the edge of his jaw. Reid closed his eyes, and was silent, except for the slow, shuddering breaths he took. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, he opened his eyes again.

"Okay…" Reid said shakily.

"Okay, what?" Morgan asked gently, trying not to sound as nervous as he was, even though he fully expected Reid to reject him. Reid simply closed his eyes again, but this time he leaned towards Morgan, giving him a quick peck on the lips before pulling back, opening his eyes. Morgan felt as if the simple contact had sent a current of electricity throughout his entire body, leaving him feeling warm, and tingly. He was staring wide-eyed at Reid, and Reid suddenly blushed, and looked away.

"I honestly don't know what I'm supposed to do now…" Reid admitted softly.

"Now, you go to sleep. We'll talk about things more in the morning," Morgan murmured affectionately.

__________________________________________________________

TBC….

A/N: Sorry if this chapter was a little mushy, especially the ending. I'm really sleepy, it's late, and my brain is full of fluffiness. Maybe more angst in later chapters. Now…sleep. Please review, tell me what you think, and what you would like to see later on. I'm going to bed now.