So did I take long enough for you?
Enjoy, and remember I own nothing but my twist, corks, and screws.
Vampires, I mean, come on! Out of all mythos to be true, vampires have to be the first we uncover. And it turns out some vampires don't particularly like outsiders. Especially ones that can hold their ground to them.
Ah hem, that would be us. You know in my wildest dreams, and I promise you I have had some pretty wild ones, I would never imagine that I would be strong enough to hold my own against a vampire. At least you know if they really are as strong as everyone says they are, and I'm pretty sure they are just because why would you make something like that up? Right? Okay well there is hype but I doubt thats the case here.
Alice gave use serious evil eyes the whole long drive to island. And when I say long I mean long, it took like seriously an hour and we were going over a hundred, which for the record does not bother me. Jasper, the one that always looks mad, looked particularly angry with his fist clenched and he kept murmuring stuff to Dr. Parsley, I mean Carlisle.
Nudge babbled on and on and on to Angel who was sitting on my lap. The tiny little barely five seater was seating way more people than was legal. I had offered that we could fly if they gave us the coordinates, but the dang vampires wouldn't spit them out. So we crammed in their fancy miniature foreign car. Alice ended up saddling Jasper, Carisle drove, and Ig, Fang and I each had a kid on our laps. It goes without saying that it was a very interesting ride.
"Edwards not going to like this." Alice said for the upmteenth time.
Jasper hugged her waste "Not one bit and I don't need for sight to know that."
"Not like it works with that mutt around."
Carlisle cleared his throat.
"I mean Jacob." Alice sneered, and continued staring us down making be feel particularly cramped, and claustrophobic
Beside me Fang didn't seem any more comfortable. For that matter nether did Iggy or Gazzy. The girls however were oblivious to it. They were on cloud nine. "I wonder what if would be like if..." "NO, they's never do this..." "Oh of course not." "Do you thing that Fang could..." "Is he really that hot..." "I know like those fan girls say Fang is but I don't see it." "I Know I don't either..." Giggle. Giggle. Squeal. Shriek. Giggle. Squeal.
Finally the car came to a screeching stop. And before one could blink the four most sane people in the car were out of it. The other four took their good old time.
"This is the fun part." Carlisle said, kind of answering my questioning look as I surveyed the expansive seashore apartment building parking lot were parked in. "We just slip in and swim out way to the island."
"Uh-huh." I smiled "How long a distance are we talking?"
Alice cackled "Oh not long, I mean for us you know. I'd guesstimate it at about 60 miles out."
"I see. What direction?"
No answer.
"You know guys, we can't swim that far, well at least not very fast. It would be easiest if you just give us a general direction and we could fly our own selves." I smiled sweetly at Alice "Unless you know you'd rather drown us."
Jasper jeered, "The thing has a point."
"You know I'm as much as a person as you things are."
"Look," the only mature person in the group spoke "it can't hurt to tell them where the island is."
I think I actually saw Carlisle shaking as he said this, but I can't be sure because there really wasn't much to shake about. And I was tired, and shaky, and was considering the use of shrooms to...I don't know drug me into letting the kids pull me into this 'adventure' in the first place. None the less I was getting a terrified vibe from Carlisle.
"Great so what direction?"
"South-West." Jasper spit before blurring into nowhere with Alice.
Carlisle nodded and followed them.
"South-west it is." I said jumping into the sky just kind of trusting that no one was looking. "Are you guys coming or not."
"Coming!" Angel yelled.
"Heck yeah, I'm coming. But Max to tell you the truth I am kind of nervous, I totally thought Alice would be nicer you know like more friendly. Do you think we spooked them too much? Or..." that was Nudge.
Gazzy and Iggy just simultaneously jumped in the sky doing summer salts. Fang followed muttering something that can only be interpreted as "I can't believe this is freaking happening. My life is freaked up."
I chuckle and lead the way to the nearest island in the general south-west direction.
Upon landing on this island we were greeted by quite a scene. Some hot guy who looked like a toned up, Iggy with topaz eyes was hunched in hunters position guarding a little girl, and a frail looking teen with red-brown scary straight hair. Alice and Jasper ranked this aggressive guy in matching hunting hunches. And native-American like dude, who I am assuming would be Jacob, stood off to the side, with his arms in the air. I guess he was trying to stay out of it. Carlisle was standing next to a tall slender women in front of the crew of hunched vampires, looking stern and concerned. There was another couple standing off the the side by Jacob kind of by Jacob. They consisted of a blond super-model and a hulk. They were kind of making out, and laughing. Like I said quite a scene.
The one that kind of looked like a buffed up Iggy spoke, growled, first "What do you want with us?"
"Want with you? Nothing. We just wanted to meat you." I bit my lip and motioned for the flock to stay behind me.
"Don't play me. You've got your wings."
"Um, yeah we have wings."
"Your angels."
I laughed, goshems what was with these people, first Carlisle and now this guy.
"This guy is Edward." He growled at me.
Okay and now Edward. He's the mind reader right?
"Yes. Now what do you want?"
I shrugged "Nothing."
Quick as light he sprung at me delivering one of the hardest punches I have ever felt to by abdomen. One that was definitely going to leave a bruise. The frail girl screamed "Edward!" and the tall one by Carlisle gasped. Alice growled more, and everyone else grew silent. Before I had time to really think adrenaline had me throwing my own punches at his marble hard chest, and a couple round-house kicks. Well until he just magically wasn't standing there anymore, and I fell on my face.
In a flash Fang was helping me up "Dang it Max!" he cursed in my ear. I waved him back and stood again in my place, watching the super human Edward rub his shoulder.
The frail chick was by his side, and was also being waved back.
Carlisle looked at me eyes big, he gulped. "I apologize for Edwards behavior, he apparently is a bit cranky. Our home is yours."
"Like hell it is." Edward responded, "Now tell my why you are here."
"Lord, to say hi, and to prove you are real simple as that." I was exasperated.
"Don't believe it." Jasper said.
Now the hulk guy untangles himself from his lover "Hi, I'm Emmett. And don't listen to anything Eddie says or does, he's just convinced you guys are Angels, but I know your not. You smell kind of like yummy chicken. You know the fried chicken I remember smelling not the shit I smell now. And I don't think real Angels would smell like that."
"Shut Up Emmie!" Alice shrieked like a banchie, springing herself at Emmett
The blond broad who was with Emmett yelled "Alice, stop now! I thinks he's right as much as I hate to admit it. Edwards lost it."
In hind sight it was kind of like watching a soap operah.
"Rosalie you need to shut up too." Jasper threatened leaning forward.
"Geeze guys quit it." It was worth a try, I wasn't trying to start the WWIII of vampires, and it certainly didn't help I could here Fang breathing up my neck, and the girls giggling.
I guess that was the wrong thing to say.
"Don't lie. I know your here to take my Nessie away. To take away my daughter. My Renesme."
"Woah there, what, back up." Take away his daughter? He's a vampire he can't reproduce? Can he? Did he like steel her, bite a kid?
"Your mind games won't work." And Edward spang at me again, just this time jumping over my head and pinning me down by the back.
The tall women gasped again, and whispered something to Carlisle who was trying to gain control of the situation. It goes without saying he failed miserably because I was left pinned under a granite heavy, angry vampire, with abunch of chaos around me.
Fang came to the rescue, sort of. With a roar of, of passion, he came and tore Edward of me. Shell shocked I ordered the rest of the flock into the air, before both Alice and Jasper were at me. Scratching at my eyes, my throat, me in general. The best of my self defense skills were tested before Emmett, and the tall women came to flank me.
I manage to get a look at Fang brawl with Edward which was more like a high action, high speed movie clip. Then again that kind of explains every fight in our entire freaking lives.
"Stay." punch "Off." punch "Max." Fang was gaining the upper hand but just barely. Out of the corner of my eye I saw blood trickling out of his nose, and a few ugly gashes of his arms.
I also noticed Jaspers sudden distraction from our own ruse.
"Shit." Emmett, and said simultaneously.
"Fang, dang it, get out of there u and a. Now dude, now." I was frantically yelling still trying to keep Alice off my back. Realizing I was lucky I wasn't bleeding, yet.
Emmett and the tall women were launching them selves at Jasper, who was now crazy eyed.
"Fang, now, u and a." I ordered again.
Fang wasn't going anywhere.
Carlisle joined Emmett and the tall broad in constraining Jasper, and I tried to work my way through Alice to help them, but she managed to hook her razor nails into my shoulder. I stifled a scream as I felt my own blood tickle out.
"I ought to bite you." Alice hissed for me.
I just gave her a nice hard kick in the chin, before yanking free and heading into the sky where I was greeted by my flock.
Alice fell to her knees, giving up, and cursing me from her grave. Whatever that means.
"Fang," I tried again "u and a now. God dang it, dude now!" If Maximum Ride, ever panics she would be panicking now.
"Max, are you okay?" a scared Angel asked.
"Yeah sweetie, don't worry I'm fine. Can't you try to force Fang up here?" I was referring to Angels mind control.
"I've tried, he knows how to resist, and its super hard without eye contact anyways. I'm sorry Max, its all my fault."
"And mine." Nudge.
"And mine." the Gasman.
"And mine." Iggy.
"And. Mine." Fang yelled up as he forced Edward to the ground and jumped on him, launching himself into the air. "Sorry Max, the bastard had the nerve to..."
"Shut up!" I smacked him, just "Shh, now let me think." Don't ask why but I thought I should try to make peace.
Then I saw it, the blond, the frail gal, and the kid. "Iggy, I need you to go and grab the girl whose standing away from the crowd."
"The one that shouted at Alice to stop?"
"That one, bring her up here and hold her."
"Kay'"
"Nudge come with me and grab the frail one."
"You mean Bella?"
"Sure."
"Okay Max."
Within five minute the three placid people were aloft with us. The blond one, Rosalie, seemed a little annoyed. Bella, looked like she was about to punch Nudge out, who was already struggling to hold her up. And the kid was hunging me, calmly, and happily.
"NO!!!" the very injured Edward cried into the night. "No!"
Oh, right he thought I was, we were, here to take the kid. Oops.
The other vampires stopped there fight, and Jasper seemed to gain some composure. They all stared at us dumb founded.
"Look," I shouted "we aren't going to take them we just needed you attention at a safe distance, and well...this is how I could get it."
Edward snarled.
"Daddy," the little girl in my arms cried "Daddy stop, they are friends they traveled all the way from Arizona to meet us. Please Daddy they come in peace."
Another snarl from Edward.
"Jakey, Jakey, make Daddy stop. Please, please, the flying Angels are nice, they are nice!" the little girl pleaded with the people below.
This wasn't quite what I had in mind, I just wanted to speak to them and then return them to let the vampires sort out their own problems but this worked to.
"Nessie, I'll try. I'll try." Jacob's voice sounded strained. "I'll try Nessie."
Jacob went over to talk to Edward and in hushed tones they talked for a long, long time.
"Can you please put me down." The blond, Rosalie said, irritated out of no where.
"Uh sure, Ig take her down."
Iggy did and she just went to stand my Emmett. She also whispered something in his ear, and the two of them began to escort Jasper away. I think I actually saw them dive into the water, but I'm not sure they kind of disappeared in a blur.
Finally Edward called up. "Ok Nessie, I'll calm down. Daddy won't hurt your new friends."
Bella looked at Edward "What did Jake say, you don't change you mind for anything, when it come to me and Renesme."
Edward shoved "Just please bring my loves down to me."
I nodded to Nudge and we did so.
We were greeted by a still grumpy but somewhat more friendly Alice, an embarrassed Carlisle, a worried tall lady (who is apparently name Esme), and a confused Jacob. Over all it was a fairly decent welcoming party compared to what we just went through.
Carlisle insisted on bandaging Fang and me, insisting "it was the least he could do." We didn't refuse figuring we had caused enough trouble. Then we helped purge their Island from our blood, which apparently smells like fried chicken, and as strong as their self control is its harder with fresh blood laying around on the floor. So it seemed like it was fair enough that we helped bleach their huge front lawn, and previous front line of vampire, bird-kid drama fight.
By now the sun was starting to creep above the horizon, and the vampires ushered us inside their beach house, a huge big lime green building that could pass as resort suites. Nudge and Angle were disappointed because they didn't get to see anyone sparkle, but we were on strict orders to get some sleep. These orders originally came from Esme, but fully supported them, and added an "I'll kick you ass if you don't get in bed" part just for a little Max flava.
Anyways, just as I was dozing off, a very loud vampire woke me from my haze. Okay, Edward wasn't really that loud, I'm just hypersensitive when asleep or about asleep. Out of old habit kind of.
"Look, Max I'm sorry I was so..."he searched for a word.
"Unwelcoming, accusing, hypersensitive, over protective, aggressive, the list goes on." You know if I ever went to manner school I'd fail. Sorry but its the truth.
"Yeah, and I'm sorry. I didn't hurt you too much did I?"
"Me, nah." Really he didn't, Alice did most of the damage to my shoulder. "Just gave me a couple of nasty bruises and a wing ache. Its fine, they'll be gone in a couple days at most."
"Alice is sorry to, she just been..."
"Ansy, aggressive, grumpy, angry, mad, frustrated, scared, annoyed, all of the above and much more."
"Yes, I guess so. Anyways she didn't really mean to hurt you she just had,"
"Anger management problems?" I finished for him.
"Mhm, and Jazz just fallows Alice, and..."
"Isn't the greatest around blood?"
Edward nodded "You've got it. Look I just thought that since you guys are angels and we are the damned of God that you'd come to punish us. And I'm not the only one who thought that, for the record, just the only one who had the guts to."
"And the overwhelming need to be over protective of you kid."
"And Bella."
I nodded, still wondering in the back of my head how a vampire could have a kid.
"We don't really understand how," Edward answered my unspoken question, mind reader-right. "just Bella me birds and the bees, and a little bit of vampire magic. Then an ugly pregnancy, and I mean ugly, and them bam Nessie." Edward smiled, and then grinned, a very lop sided grin. "You haven't read the books have you? Or at least not 'Breaking Dawn'."
I bit my lip, also grinning "Does the first chapter of the first book count?"
Edward chuckled "Not really."
"Didn't think so."
"So why did you angels want to find us."
I rolled my eyes "We aren't angels. We are 98% human, 2% avian hybrids. Scientifically created, and if you ask any good old Bible Thumper damned by God too. We might have wings but we aren't any divine creature. Except for this one time when Fang and I needed to escape from this one crack house we got trapped in- then we were the 'Angels of Darkness'. Ah good memories, good memories."
Without skipping a beat Edward answered "You are angel enough for me. Is there anyway I can, we can pay you back for you trouble?"
"Well, you know Angel? The little one with white wings, and for the record she isn't an angel either, thats just her name. She too is a mind reader, and well she can control minds too, but since my mom poisoned them with your books she has been idolizing you so..."
"Gotcha."
"And if its not to much trouble Nudge would love a make over from the girls. Iggy, go ask him. And Gaz would probably be happy arm wrestling a vampire."
Edward nodded "That doesn't seem to hard, but what about you?"
"Me? Look I here because, well because of your stupid franchise and the need to make a point. Mission fulfilled, I don't need anything else." The I grinned mischievously "Unless you'll let me take on Bella just for fun-which I doubt."
"You doubt right." Edward gave me a light punch on my good shoulder.
I punched him back harder with my bad arm.
"Don't underestimate the part human."
"You better not." Fang walked in, shoving his way carelessly around Edward. "Although you managed to break two ribs dude."
I laughed, I don't know why but I laughed like it was the funniest thing ever. Fang just stared at me like I was crazy. Which I am on so many levels and I admit it.
"Sorry, man." Edward said, very seriously.
"De Nada. No problemo. They'll be fine quicker that light."
"Thats good." An awkward air filled the grand room, which was painted crimson, with white and black furniture.
"For the record I totally owned you."
This time it was my turn to stare at Fang. "What did you just say?"
"I totally owned Edward."
"Ummm, isn't that what Ella said?"
"Yeah."
I raised my eyebrows and started laughing again. "Dude, where have you gone! You haven't said a word the whole trip and now you 'own Edward'? Fang what happened to you." Pause.
Silence.
"What did you do with my Fang?! Man..." I couldn't finish I began laughing so hard.
Edward left then politely closing the door behind him. Leaving an intoxicated me (I was intoxicated by laughter, not anything naughty for your dirty little minds) with a talkative Fang, who climbed in the huge King bed with me wrapping his arm around my shoulders. Just like the good old time camping out in forest, we were close, together, just this time in a bed.
I let out one more string of giggles before falling asleep in Fangs strong arms.
Now who would have guessed all of this would happen all because of one silly franchise. A series of silly books, and sparkley vampires. The joys of being avian human bird-kid.
So how was that? Random huh?
NO- really...hmmm
SHOUT OUT TO EVERYONE WHO HAS EVER – reviewed, favorited, alerted this story or me. I love you all. I also love you all just because you have read my little corky crossover and put up with my insanely late updates!!!
You also all have Neko4 because he is the one who made me actually write this. Because this afternoon I sat down to write something, anything. And I checked my e-mail and there was this review alert from Neko4-and I'm like "Oh yeah I have to finish that, thats what I'll work on today..." so guess what, I actually finished it.
REVIEWS LOVED, and eventually rewarded, I'm working my way down the list, so this make take awhile...but I promise I'll get to you before I die, unless I'm killed tonight which I doubt will happed...
Austo Luego Mi Amigos,
Adios,
Amore tu'!
Bub-Bye My Loves,
This is where we part,
Keep an eye out for me,
here and in the world:
A.S. Lee!