I certainly do not own DGM D:

Chapter 6: His past

"Fight, only for me."

The low, soft tapping of his boots echoed through the surroundings as Kanda was walking along the corridor at the first floor. His black belt was around his waist as his katana was strapped between the belt, at his left hip. His dark raven hair was down as he did not bother to tie it early in the morning. He was wearing a navy blue vest with black tight pants as both of his hands were slipped into his pockets. As he walked, some people passed by and they bowed down in a form of respect. He ignored them as usual and continued to pace on, idle and looking bored. He turned right at a far corner and continued to walk till he stepped out of the building. Kanda stopped, his hands still in his pockets. He slowly took a deep breath, breathing in the nice, freshly scent of flowers and leaves, seeming to be enjoying this moment.

It had been a long time since he stepped out of this cage to have a breather. He was supposed to report to a dark room in the Order everyday, but today was an exception. His look turned serious as he looked ahead and walked on. Some leaves fell down onto his head as the wind blew right in his face, but he was unmoved by the happenings around him as he reached an isolated building which stood out among those trees. He stood at the front door and knocked lightly, before he waited for someone to come and open the door.

"Yuu! Yuu..."

"Shut up! Didn't I tell you not to call me by that name?"

"You are here, Kanda-san." The door slowly creaked open as a person wearing white was there. Kanda just nodded and entered. The surrounding was dark with few lights at the side of the walls. He closed his eyes for a while, letting himself get used to it.

"This way, Kanda-san." The person gestured. Kanda merely nodded again as he followed him. He could hear drips of water as their steps echoed through the cold realm. The samurai looked up, wondering whether there was a water source nearby. It was his first time here and he was surprised that there was such a place situated here, used by the Vatican. It showed that there were some secrets that the Vatican had not revealed to them yet. Komui should not get known of this yet, because if he knew, he would surely note them about every single place that the Order used for their activities.

Or maybe that stupid supervisor was hiding something from them as well. Kanda's frown deepened at this.

He sniffed the air and realised that it had a weird stench that smelt like chemicals, and this choked his throat and made his lungs uncomfortable. He observed the surrounding closely and noticed some cameras in all corners. The Vatican was not dumb after all. They were observing them all the time, making sure that none of them betrayed the organisation by going to the enemy. To people working in the Black Organisation, they were treated none other than pawns for the Vatican's uses.

"We are here, Kanda-san." They reached another black door that was similar to the door that he came in. The person in white opened the door as the surrounding suddenly brightened, causing his eyes to sting. Kanda covered his face by his hand as he looked through the gaps in between his fingers, seeing many different machineries and a surgery bed in front of him. The headlights above must be the cause for this brightness. He blinked a few times before he saw the insides of the room more clearly.

"Yuu..."

"Told you not to call me by that name."

"Why aren't you out hunting today?"

"Are you really that interested in finding out why?"

"Yes, Yuu, because you are not yourself today."

"Why am I not out today, you asked? Well, maybe it's because..."

He lay down onto the bed, his vest taken off as his broad chest shone brightly by the headlights above him. Many people walked around this crammed place as the sound of beeping rang in his ears again and again, making him dizzy. He felt something was attached to his chest, and light sizzles could be felt as his muscles started to tighten. Whispers hovered in the air, as his eyelids were getting heavy. His head started to hurt as he felt his forehead, figuring out what he was looking for in his memory. The glaring light continued to put pressure on him as he closed his eyes, drifting off to sleep.

"Maybe it's because...I do not have the urge to kill humans today."

Echoes of voices could be heard as images swarmed in his eyes, making him dizzy. He was slipping in and out of consciousness, not knowing where he was.

"Yuu...Yuu..."

"Kanda...Kanda..."

Many people were calling his name, but he could not identify who was the one calling him. Everything was in a mess, as those voices continued to call for him, wanting him to answer back to them. He opened his mouth, trying to answer back, but realised that he couldn't, because he had lost his own voice.

The brightness in front of him was so glaring, that he wondered whether this was the gate to Heaven. Though he did not believe in Christianity and Catholicism, where people see God when they die, but everything in front of him looked so real that he had to believe.

His eyelids were getting heavy again, as he was following the voices that were calling out for him. As his eyes closed, he could faintly see a shadow approaching him through the light, like an angel descending from Heaven to guide him to his home. He smiled. Finally, everything that was tormenting him was taken off his broken body, and he was set free, away from things and matters that he could not face. He finally had freedom at last.

"Kanda...Kanda..."

"It's snowing." The child murmured as she stretched her hand outside the window, letting the snowflakes touched it with its light coldness. The candle flame flickered in the dim morning light as the girl brushed through her thick locks and gave a sigh, staring at the white sky.

"Sighing?" She turned and saw a tall, slender figure at the entrance. She turned back again and looked outside.

"Rebecca," She replied in a listless tone before the room was silent again. The door closed softly as Rebecca walked towards Momo, standing beside her, looking outside as well.

"What are you thinking, Momo?" Momo did not say anything, her gaze at the snow that descended from the sky. This view reminded her of Christmas. At that time where she and the rest of her family stayed, it was like that too. The snow just fell from the sky endlessly, burying the earth with its white frost. She exhaled, as the warm breaths escaped from her freezing lips which was slightly pale.

This weather just brought back many memories from the past. She sniffed. It felt rather nostalgic.

"He hates snow." Rebecca looked at Momo questioningly, not expecting her to reply. Momo's grip on the back of the chair tightened as her legs shuffled slightly against the cushion.

"He hates snow. He always hates white stuffs, especially snow, because it is just too glaring for him." She redrew her hand and looked at the snow that filled her palm.

"Especially things that associate with him."

Rebecca just stared at her before her eyes softened. She turned and looked at the sky again, sharing the same thoughts.

"Ah, I agree." Momo turned to look at her sister. The fire at the fireplace crackled as an umbrella with a pumpkin head was resting at the side of the fireplace. Some pairs of long, striped socks were hanging there, getting dried by the heat from the fire, as some photo frames of them were place at the top of the fireplace.

"Our boss asked us to find the four elite guardians right?"

"Yes. We have already found one, now left the other three, who seems to be in separate directions. That fat man Gorcio and the twins are searching for them."

"The twins? Are they even dependable?" Momo asked, frowning. "They just bring nothing but trouble, and we always have to clean up their mess afterwards." She folded her arms and swung her legs hardly, grumbling.

"No matter what they have done, they are part of the Family." Rebecca persuaded. Momo just sighed in reply.

"You are just too forgiving, Rebecca. You have to be strict at them sometimes."

"Well, they are only kids."

"I'm a kid too." Momo pointed out, having a tone of displeasure in her voice, as she played with her brown curls by twirling them between her fingers.

"But you are different. You are the eldest member of this Family after all." This reply stumped her completely as Momo turned to her, speechless. Her lips turned into a grin as her golden eyes twinkled in the darkness.

"But one more question, Rebecca. Why are our names different from before?" The golden-haired lady just stood there, stumped by this question. Momo just gave a devilish grin as she looked at the white scenery once more, lost in her memories.

"Anyway, where's Yamamoto?" Momo asked.

"I don't know. Maybe he has gone there."

"There...is it?" Momo murmured, looking at her doll.

"Do you still remember us...Yuu-nii?"

In that silent voice of snow, the golden bell jingled from her golden hair, drowned by the howls of the blizzard.

"Yuu!" His eye twitched and he growled, reaching out for his katana, ready to draw out his sword and slash down at that bastard who dared to mouth out his name so casually. His movement was slow and even as he was waiting for the right moment to strike.

"Now!" He turned around and slashed down his sword at full force, but was stopped when something clashed into his weapon. He looked up and saw another sword blocking his attack. His eyes narrowed as his emotionless eyes were fixed on that grin plastered on that person's face. His frown deepened. That grin was starting to annoy him.

"One more time and you are going to see the gates of Heaven next." He hissed, lowering his sword and sheathing back.

"Scary as usual, Yuu."

"You do not sound frightened to me, Zashiki." He spoke coldly. Zashiki just smiled and laughed out loud, treating this like a joke, which annoyed Kanda even more.

"What's so funny, Zashiki?" Zashiki just coughed and kept his laugh back to himself as he shrugged.

"Well, you look and sound different today, Yuu, so I want to be the first to check it out what makes this stoic samurai changes his mood today." He sneered, adding some sarcasm, as he played with his white hair which had the same length as Kanda.

"Your wish has been granted, apparently." Kanda said, totally uninterested in this conversation as he started to walk away. The forest floor was damp from the rain last night and he had trained enough. It was time to go back.

"Wait, Yuu. Can't we just chat like friends?"

"Are we even friends, Zashiki?" Silence greeted them as dry leaves fell onto the ground almost silently. Kanda looked at the white-haired samurai from the corner of his eye, realising that he was acting weird.

"What happened?"

"What do you mean by that?" Zashiki walked up to Kanda in quick steps and gripped his collar, slamming him onto a nearby tree hardly.

"Something must have happened. You are not like that. You are not, Yuu."

"Let me go." That empty, dead eyes were warning him to let go, before he did something worse to him. The white and the raven strands were mixed together, entangled.

"Did that bastard do something to you? Did he?" Zashiki hissed lowly, bringing out the tone of anger that was about to blow up. The brown and yellow leaves shuffled on the ground, with the help of the wind.

"Watch what you are saying, Zashiki. He is our Master, the one we serve."

"Would a father do terrible things to his son, using him as a puppet and venting out his frustration and anger on him whenever he likes it?" Kanda's eyes narrowed as veins were seen protruding out of his temples. He pulled out his sword immediately and gave a random attack towards Zashiki. The white-haired samurai jumped back and managed to dodge before the whole place exploded, blowing up dust and small particles into the air. The dust cleared and Kanda was standing there, pointing his sword right at his throat.

"If you say all these nonsense again, I will kill you with no hesitation, Zashiki, and trust me, I mean it." He warned, as his raven hair fluttered in the wind. The face expression did not change as he sheathed his sword and walked away. Zashiki just looked at him before he sighed, brushing his fringe through his fingers, staring at that lonely view the raven-haired samurai portrayed.

"You never change, Yuu. How long are you going to be trapped in that devil's grasp?"

"You are back, Kanda-sama." He just walked past, not intending to answer them back. They were just servants who worked for the Family, and to him, they were of no significance. His black vest was soaked from the perspiration and he went back to his room. He grabbed the towel on his bed and entered the washroom. He then took off all his clothes and stepped into the showers.

"Kanda-sama, we have already laden a new fresh set of clothes for you." Again, he did not intend to reply, as lukewarm water drenched his smelling body, washing away all the smell and dirt. The water vapour blurred the mirror and the glass of the shower room as light scent of lotus soap filled the washroom. He scrubbed his hair evenly and gently as he stood under the shower, feeling the foam travelling down his body and into the drain.

"Something must have happened. You are not like that. You are not, Yuu."

He squeezed the body shampoo onto his hand as he started to wash his body. He frowned as he looked at the brand of the shampoo.

"Would a father do terrible things to his son, using him as a puppet and venting out his frustration and anger on him whenever he likes it?"

He turned off the shower as he opened the glass doors, his warm feet stepping onto the cold tiles. Kanda wrapped the towel around his lower body as he walked out of the washroom, finding his clothes placed neatly on his bed. He let the white towel slid down onto the floor as he started to dress up.

Damn, why did Zashiki's words affect him so much?

"Kanda-sama, the Master wants to meet you later at the dining room. The three guardians would also be there as well." Kanda stared at the mirror and looked at the black uniform that was zipped up to his neck. He took the white gloves and wore them as he took Mugen and strapped it at his waist. He took some belongings with him as he opened the door and went out, closing it behind him. Two masked people were already standing there, waiting for him. They bowed as they saw him, and gestured for him to follow.

"That's Kanda Yuu, the leader of the four Elites."

"Ah. It's really such a great honour meeting him in person."

"Yeah. You can hardly get to meet him here. Earl-sama has high hopes for him."

"We are here, Kanda-sama." Kanda stopped walking as he stood at the wide entrance, looking inside. The table was laden with food, and everyone was already present.

"Late as usual?" A person having red spiky hair and a thin ponytail at his back sneered, mocking at him.

"Hey, what tone is that when you are speaking to our leader, Scrape?!?" Zashiki hissed, glaring at him.

"What, are you unhappy with me, you shrimp?" Scrape slammed the table as he stood up, glaring back at him.

"Shut up, the two of you. You are noisy."

"What, Uno? You have something to add on?" Scrape asked, angry. The teenage girl just giggled as she adjusted her black cap on her head, showing her short purple strands at the side of her face and hiding the rest of her hair inside her cap. She took a silver fork at the side of her empty plate and just knocked it gently on a glass wine cup, making high-pitched ringing sounds. She giggled again, amused.

"Please quieten down, all of you, and return to your seat. You may sit down too, Yuu-kun." The Earl spoke with authority, as everyone abided.

"Yes." Kanda replied as he went to his seat beside Uno and sat down.

"Now, what matter is so urgent that the Earl wants to have a meeting at this point of time?" Zashiki asked.

"What, wanting all the credit?" Scrape spat out and laughed, rolling his eyes and making a clown look on his face, making fun of him.

"What the hell did you say?!?" Uno looked at them and giggled again.

"Shut up." The table was silent as everyone turned to the dominant one who finally spoke out.

"What?" Scrape hissed, glaring at Kanda. "You do not have the right to talk here..."

"Which Japanese words couldn't you understand, Scrape?" Kanda spoke calmly and looked up, the empty blue sapphire eyes staring straight at him, sending a piercing cold feeling down his body as his first warning. Scrape shut his mouth immediately and just turned away, muttering something under his breath. Zashiki just looked at Kanda in admiration, as Uno just smiled, and the Earl raised his eyebrow. Kanda then peered at his food and continued to eat his breakfast like nothing had happened.

"Now, shall we start the meeting?"

-

"Yuu." Somebody called him. He stopped walking, not bothering to turn around and face the person calling him, but he knew more than himself who that person was.

"Mother." A tall, elegant lady walked to him and put her hands onto his shoulders. Kanda flinched for a moment, before he relaxed himself. She walked to the front and faced him, smiling.

"How is your day, Yuu? Did you miss Mama?" Kanda did not reply, his gaze always looking at the front and not at his mother. The lady just smiled and stroked his soft hair down his earlobes, caressing his face with her smooth, warm touch.

"Yuu, I miss you, Yuu." She continued her caressing, having that same gentle smile on her face, as she gave a gentle look at her beloved son. She then wrapped her arms around his back and hugged him. Kanda's expression still did not change at all. His focus would forever be at the front instead of looking at her.

"Mother, I have to go." Kanda spoke. His mother released him immediately as Kanda started to walk away without signs of hesitation, away from his mother. The lady just wrapped her shawl around her shoulders and waved back to her son, telling him to have a good day. Kanda continued to move forward, and turned left. His solitary footsteps echoed through the distance before he stopped again. In the shadows, stood a person who was leaning against a wall.

"You never change since the day I took care of you, Yuu." Kanda slowly turned his head to where the person was.

"Yamamoto?" The person walked out of his place, taking his black hat off his head as he smiled. He was wearing a suit and he had dark curls.

"And you are still as alert as ever, Yuu."

"Why are you here, Yamamoto?" Yamamoto chuckled as he took a cigarette and smoked.

"Is there a reason needed for a teacher to visit his student?" Kanda just frowned slightly, his raven hair resting behind his back silently. Suddenly, the black figure disappeared in a flash, which startled Kanda a little, as the samurai looked around all corners, alert.

"Yuu..." Kanda turned around quickly and saw the quick flash of his presence appeared right behind him. His eyes were focused as Kanda pulled out his sword immediately and deflected the attack from his teacher in time, causing his feet to shuffle backwards before coming to a halt. The two of them just stared at each other face to face before Kanda realised what had happened and quickly jumped back before Yamamoto slid his weapon into him. Kanda landed a few distances away, looking at him, while Yamamoto just sighed as he noticed some small cuts on his suit.

"You have improved, Yuu. Looks like you are going to surpass your teacher in no time! Isn't that great? Hahaha!" He put his hands on his waist and laughed loudly.

"You should not be here, Yamamoto. The Noah Family currently has assigned tasks to do, right?" Kanda asked, walking towards him.

"Ah, but it's almost done. Momo's settling the last part, so I thought of returning here earlier to come and visit my cute student!" Yamamoto grinned as he replied. Kanda was patting off the dust on his uniform as he sheathed back his sword. The black markings at his eyes were more visible in the sunlight shining through the openings of their base as Kanda tidied his long hair and said, "Don't call me cute, Yamamoto. It's disgusting." Yamamoto's grin fell as he pouted, having a sulking look on his face.

"Yuu you meanie!"

"Shut up, Yamamoto." Kanda said with emotionless tone.

"Anyway, you should not treat her like that. She is your mother after all." Kanda flinched slightly to this sentence, which was caught by Yamamoto.

"We should not have emotions in our way. You should know this better than I do." Kanda replied coldly, as he started to walk away slowly but in a firm manner, having the confident and determined look that would not be wavered easily. Yamamoto just looked at his back view and shook his head. Once that guy had his resolve, no one would be able to change his mind. Somehow this reminded him of how the Millennium Earl worked.

"Well, the both of them are rather similar."

-

"I should not treat Mother like that...is it?" Kanda murmured softly. He sighed as he looked at the family portrait in the photo frame. It had his father, his mother and himself when he was just four years old. Both of them were smiling to him as they cradled their beloved and precious child in their arms...

That was why he hated portraits in the first place. That dream...had already shattered long ago.

It was not there anymore. It had stopped existing. Father and Mother's joyful voices were not there anymore.

He could say that his parents existed, and did not exist in reality, but this did not matter anymore.

The result, would still be the same.

"My...important..." He slowly opened his eyes slightly, but the glare was simply too bright, and he felt too sleepy. Those voices continued to travel through his ears and into his mind as he closed his eyes once again, slipping into his memories.

"My...important..."

He could not get him off his mind. No matter where he went, that image and that gentle voice continued to follow him.

That eyes, that face, that smile, and his voice, all filled his mind vividly.

"Yuu..."

Kanda closed his eyes and let out a sigh as he brushed off the strands of his hair that was blocking his vision. He looked at the sunset outside at the balcony situated in his room. The reddish-orange sun was descending behind the mountains, getting ready for its sleep. He held out his hand and touched on the gloves.

(Recall)

"Yuu, why are you wearing these gloves? The four elite guardians do not need these as part of our uniform." Zashiki asked, pointing to the white gloves that he was wearing.

"It's none of your business." Kanda spoke coldly. Zashiki just made a face and turned around, sticking out his tongue at him.

"Fine, fine! If that's what you want, Kanda Yuu, I will not ask further!" He walked away in a huff, leaving the raven-haired samurai there, staring at the pair of white gloves. He had wondered himself why he was wearing these useless stuffs that would not help him in combats or anything at all. He wanted to throw them away, but he realised he could not do it.

(End of recall)

That scent carried in that pair of white gloves...reminded him of his presence. The scent emitted from his body...was the same. He took them off his hands and held them close to his nose, sniffing the sweet scent lingering.

That boy, whose hair was as white as snow...

"My...important..."

-

"Yuu..."

"Who are you?"

"Hello. You are Yuu right?" He smiled as he approached him casually, stretching out his hand. His white shoulder-length hair stood out among the crowd as the strands floated along the blows of the wind.

It was just...too similar.

"I'm Allen, Kanda."

"I'm Al, and nice to meet you, Yuu."

Kanda was lying on his bed in his room, asleep. Evening was reaching their place, as the sun was setting behind the mountains, creating a deep red horizon that shone above the sky. The birds chirped as they flew across the broad white sheets stained with redness, back to their nests and rest for the day. The soft breathings from Kanda could be heard as he buried himself deeper into his blankets, hiding his tired face from the evening light, sleeping soundly.

As the light, transparent curtains fluttered along the invisible waves of the wind, someone was hiding there, as he emerged into view, his dark skin blended into the dim room. He slowly approached the sleeping one at the corner, as he put his hand onto his cheek.

"We meet again...my student."

This is the real past of Kanda before he became an Exorcist. In this chapter, he was going to have his normal check-up on his body, and when he slept, images of his pastime memories started to play in his mind. The darkest side of the truth will be reveal once again. More of Kanda's past revealed in the next chapter! Please look forward to it and most importantly, read and review!

There is a reason why Kanda called him 'Yamamoto' instead of 'Tyki' in the past, but I shall not tell you...for now! :D

I do not know when I would end this story, but I just go on with the flow, so when my mind says that this story is coming to an end, it will come to an end! :D

For now, enjoy! I would be focusing more on Kanda in the next few chapters, so there will be lesser scenes of Allen! Gomen gomen!! DD: And I know that there are some parts that are rather weird, but they seem to be able to fit in this story so I just leave it :/ Ask any questions in the review section if you have any doubts in this story, and I will answer them :)

And sorry for spelling and grammar mistakes! D:

Singingblues

Note: Those sentences in italics are the recollections of Kanda's past and the present scenes are not in italics, but there are further more recollections in his past memories, so in order not to let all of you readers be confused, I have put (recall) to let all of you know that Kanda is recalling something. Hope this does not confuse you all :)

Please review ~ They make me happy ~