Chapter 3: The Pillsbury dough boy lends a helping hand.

"I saw my baby, cry'n hard as babe could cry,

what could I do?"

Away in the distance could be heard the sound of David Bowie still grooving to a magic dance, but all Anna could see around her was the dark pit of despair she had been tossed into after accusing the helping hands of indecent contact. Now there was no hope, none at all and she was missing the 'magic dance' segment that is EVERYONE's favorite part of the whole movie. Things were dark.

"Anna" A small voice squeaked from a corner of the room "Don't give up!"

"Why not?" She asked "I missed the magic dance, the rest of this fantasy is gonna be dumb anyway and I'm never going to make it in time to get even one piece of the pie."

"But you must!" The creature that emerged from the corner was white with a lot of, well, we'll just say stuffing. "The Pillsbury bake off needs your recipe!"

"Oh my god!" Said Anna "It's the Pillsbury dough boy! I always knew I could count on you, you're right, I'm so depressed about missing the magic dance that I forgot what this was really about. I'm here to get a pie and I'm gonna get it if it's the last thing I ever eat!"

"I know a secret door! Teehee!" Said the Pillsbury dough boy as he led the way out through a fairly obvious exit. "But be careful, there's all sorts of things lurking about."

"Since when does the dough boy know anything about adventuring?" Asked Anna.

"Maybe it's because I'm not the dough boy." Suddenly the pitch of the Pillsbury man deepened quite a bit. He took off his mask to reveal-

"Mark Wahlberg." Jareth Bowie suddenly appeared in a usual array of spandex "You're not helping this girl are you?"

Mark Wahlberg's complexion paled as he turned to see the goblin king. "What?-er No!" He said

"Good" Said Jareth Bowie "Because if I thought that you were helping her on her way in any way shape or form I would have you thrown into the bog of forgotten actors."

"No!" Screamed Mark "Anything but that...That would mean going into.."

"Yes that's right" Laughed evil Jareth Bowie "Voice acting! Bwahahaha!..And you" He turned to Anna "How are you finding my labyrinth? Difficult enough yet?"

"Dance...Dance magic dance..." Anna hummed hopefully.

"That part is over!" Snapped Bowie "Magic dance is over! Tell me what you think of the labyrinth!"

"Put that magic spell on me- Jump, jump magic jump..."

Bowie got frustrated and disappeared leaving behind only a strong smell of hairspray.

"Close one." Said Mark Wahlberg "C'mon let's get out of here."

"How do I know if I can trust you?" Anna asked "You talk to monkeys!

"Let me put it this way" He said while climbing up a ladder that would lead them back to the maze "Would you rather have Kevin Bacon as your guide?"

Long pause.

"You don't have to answer that." Said Mark Wahlberg.

"I just didn't want to hurt your feelings." Said Anna while climbing also.

When they got up they heard a loud roar and Mark screamed and ran off. Anna just shrugged and decided to go toward it. If she had missed the magic dance things couldn't get any worse right?

A/N: Heh heh, sorry guys for making this thing three chapters longer than it should be. Feel free to erase it any time and HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!