As Arthur emerged from the stables it seemed as if everyone in Camelot was looking right at him. It didn't help that the castle and grounds were packed with spectators and royalty and servants who'd been settling in for the tournament.
These people would have gawked as Merlin was carried past but a moment earlier. The idea of all these strangers watching his friend bleeding, dying, sickened Arthur.
"What are you looking at?!" he yelled, pointing at himself with both hands. "What?!" Almost as one, the startled people turned back to their tasks, making as if they'd not been staring in the first place. Just as he was about to start bellowing at the top of his lungs Arthur stopped himself. He wasn't about to give these people fodder. Wasn't going to have them go home and talk about how Merlin had been…hurt…and the prince had completely come unglued at the stables today. Fuck them.
Arthur was sure word would have already gotten back to the king. In no way did he want to be ensnared by his father who'd likely have some lecture for Arthur about the situation and not allowing himself to become torn up over a half-wit serving boy.
If his little meltdown in the stable taught Arthur anything it was that he had to be with Merlin, his friend, his truest friend. Now. Winding through a route he hoped his father wouldn't intersect him on, Arthur hurried to Gaius' chambers. The closer he got the greater his fear until he was pelting down the last hall, other's opinions forgotten. In his minds eye he imagined the room empty except for Merlin's shrouded form. Lying out on the hard, unforgiving, table. A whimper escaped his lips as Arthur burst through Gaius' door terrified at what he might see.
"Merlin?"
Merlin was curled on his side lying on Gaius' bed, which had been pulled up close to the fire. Pillows were propped behind him. He was so, so pale. A pile of bloody rags was heaped on the floor to the side. Yet for a moment Arthur's heart leapt with hope, Merlin was moving. That had to be a good sign.
Arthur barely kept from crying out himself as he realized that Merlin was writhing—twitching—in pain, his face was agony. Eyes shut tightly and, mouth agape, Merlin's pitiful groans whispered past his lips as a fresh line of blood was wiped gently away by Gaius.
"Sire, please sit before you fall." Gaius looked up, taking in the young prince. He was clearly in shock; his hands shook as he raked them through his hair helplessly. His eyes were glassy and refused to meet Gaius'. He obviously had a head injury, the severity of which Gaius couldn't guess at, and his right hand was swollen and bloody.
"Let me look at you…"
"No." Arthur shook his head, eyes never leaving his servant.
"Sire…"
"No." Merlin was clearly struggling, Arthur couldn't bear to watch, couldn't bear to look away. "Tell me Gaius."
For a beat Gaius hesitated, Arthur's face contorted in pain as Merlin twitched and cried out, Arthur took a step closer, unsure.
After a moment, Gaius relented. "Fine but not until you sit."
Arthur sat on the edge of a seat by the bed, still not looking at Gaius. The firelight danced off his haggard features.
Gaius threw a blanket over the prince's shoulders and sat too. He wasn't sure how to begin. Arthur was barely more than a boy, a frightened and injured boy at that. However, Arthur had seen his fair share of life and would not appreciate Gaius keeping anything from him.
He took a deep breath and began "As far as I can tell, Merlin was kicked once, here…" Gaius pointed to the left side of his own chest; Arthur nodded absently "and sustained other, smaller impacts. The only serious injury is the one to his chest." After hesitating a moment he drew the blanket back and gently opened Merlin's shirt. Arthur's stomach clenched violently again. His lips disappeared into a thin hard line. Thank the gods he'd already thrown up. Merlin's thin torso was a mass of bruising, hideously mottled purple and brown. But worst than anything Arthur had ever seen before was the shape; the left side of Merlin's rib cage had been virtually staved in. Arthur's shaking hand went to his mouth and he slammed his eyes.
"Tell me!" Arthur roughly demanded, his eyes were still shut and he spoke from behind his hand. He knew what Gaius was going to say. He had to hear it.
"I'm sorry sire." Arthur was already shaking his head…a lone tear had escaped captivity. Gaius broke off, his voice hitching "Merlin has lost too much blood..." Arthur shook his head harder
"Please no…" he croaked out "please." This could not be happening.
Gaius continued "and I can do nothing to repair the lung or the broken ribs which are tearing into it." To himself, Gaius lamented that Merlin was too seriously injured, too far gone, to heal himself. If only Gaius had pushed him to learn more, learn faster, practice more diligently. The guilt burned like vinegar in his throat.
Arthur's head swum. He was surprised when he opened his eyes to find his vision blurring with wetness. How could this be happening?! An hour ago he and Merlin were joking. Well, actually an hour ago he'd been hurling insults at Merlin. Now, Merlin was going to die.
"When?" his voice broke.
"I don't know. Before night fall."
Arthur's own face scrunched in agony nearly mirroring Merlin's own. "Is he conscious? Can he hear me?"
"There is no simple answer Arthur. As far as I can tell, Merlin is not unconscious, yet his pain is so great…" Gaius closed his eyes for a moment. He'd never felt more of a failure as a physician "Merlin is in such pain that I don't believe he is aware of anything else."
Gods, Merlin didn't deserve to suffer like! No one did, not even Camelot's worse enemy, but especially not Merlin. Arthur realized he loved his silly, clumsy, wonderful friend. So much.
And it hurt.
"Can't you do something for the pain Gaius?" Arthur pleaded. His hand snuck forwards and back, wanting to touch Merlin but afraid to cause him more pain.
"I have given him willow already. I was preparing a draught…to" Gaius turned away, unable to face either boy "to end it. I was waiting for you Arthur; I know Merlin would have wanted me to wait."
Arthur was confused "Surely you have something stronger than willow for pain? I'm sure you've given me potions in the past…"
"Yes, a potent extract of a rare poppy plant..."
"What are you waiting for!? Merlin must have it!"
"Sire, the medicine is very rare."
Arthur's features fell. "You have none…"
"Not exactly sire. I have a small supply which Uther has instructed be used only for royalty…" Gaius looked away then tenderly removed the blood-soaked rag from under Merlin's cheek and replaced it with a clean cloth; Merlin had been lying very still.
Suddenly Merlin thrashed, Gaius reached out a hand to steady the boy lest he tip onto his injury. Merlin cried out, his yelp turning into heart wrenching sobs. As Merlin's whole frail body shook, tears tracked down his pale face. Arthur couldn't stand it, giving in to his desire to touch his friend. Gently cupping Merlin's face in his hands Arthur stroked away the tears. It seemed as his wiped them from Merlin they alit on his own face. Arthur roughly swiped at his own cheek with the back of a hand.
"Give Merlin the medicine! Now! Can't you see he's suffering?!" Arthur was beside himself, willing to do almost anything at that moment to spare Merlin the pain he was suffering. Almost anything. He'd even sit by as Gaius administered a draught of death if he had to.
"But your father…'
"Gauis! I don't care—he's wrong, this medicine can't be spared for royalty alone! Give it to Merlin!" Why did he have to fight the old man on this!?
"You don't believe it should be saved sire?"
"Of course not!"
Arthur looked impatiently up at Gaius who said "There is a woman in the village sire. Now. Breech birth. The pain will likely kill her and therefore the baby as well." Arthur knew where Gaius was going with this but could not find it in himself to care.
"If I were to give this to her sire, she might live." Then came the rub. "Merlin will not."
"Damn it all!" Arthur's voice was a dangerous whisper "Don't you assume to teach me a lesson at a time like this!"
"M'lord, lessons do not always come at the time of our choosing…"
Arthur spoke in a soft steady tone but his eyes burned with rage and terror and pain. "Let me be perfectly clear Gaius, so you can stop talking to me and help Merlin. I do not care what this medicine might do for someone else. I do not care what Uther has decreed, and I will have your bloody head if you leave Merlin to suffer for one more moment. Do. You. Understand?"
"As you wish sire"
As Gaius went to his cupboard to retrieve the small bottle Arthur slumped in his chair, with his head in his hands. "Please Merlin…" he whispered and swallowed roughly. Please what? He could not think of another word. "Please…"
As Gaius returned with the little bottle, he added one last lesson to the list Arthur would think about in the weeks and months to come. "You know sire, had your father not ordered me to ration this, there would have been none for Merlin…"
Ok, because of sure wonderful feedback, I put in some extra work and got the chapter done much sooner than I'd thought! Chapter 4, likely late next week. More feedback please!