NEVER GO TO BED ANGRY

Jack - 14-ish
AJ - 7
Kate - 5
Seth - 3

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Jack's eyes opened groggily as he felt his mattress shift. While he'd inherited his father's unfortunate habit of sleeping very lightly, he hadn't inherited the ability to wake clear-headed. So who, or what, was currently climbing into his bed? Two somethings, if his mind could tell properly. The bed squeaked, right at the spot it usually did, and Jack couldn't stop his smile when all movement stopped.

"Shh, Neenee! You wake him up!"

Kate, his mind supplied. His little sister. And the only person she ever called 'Neenee' was his oldest younger sibling, AJ. His smile turned to a frown. He'd been staying with his dad and Emily for almost two weeks now while his mother was whisked away on a honeymoon. And honestly, he was surprised at his current predicament. Usually, his sisters snuck into Mom and Dad's bed instead of big brother Jack's.

"What's going on?"

His voice made both of them freeze.

"See what you goned and doned?!" Kate said and Jack could hear the pout in his voice.

"I'm a light sleeper, Katie, it's not Annie's fault. What are you two doing down here? I'm not very good at helping with nightmares," Jack said, pushing himself up against the headboard.

AJ was the first to crawl up and snuggle against his side. He and AJ had always held a closer bond than he had with the other two, but it didn't seem to faze any of them. He wrapped his arm around her as she curled tighter into his side. Something was most definitely wrong.

"Mommy and Daddy are fighting," his seven-year-old sister said as Kate crawled up and sat on her ankles beside him.

"Fighting?" He hadn't heard Emily and his father fighting. In fact, they seemed perfectly normal and had since he'd arrived.

"They're yelling at each other," AJ explained. "It's not the first time either."

"They've been yelling at each other?"

"Yeah," Kate replied, bunching her fists in her nightgown.

"What about?" Jack asked, raising his other arm for Kate to crawl under. He hugged them both.

"Mommy thinks Daddy's working too much. And that he's not spending time with us," AJ replied, snuggling into his warmth.

Jack pulled the blankets up around them. "And Daddy?" At fourteen, he didn't refer to his father as 'Daddy' anymore, but he did with his siblings.

"Daddy thinks Mommy's just upset because we haven't had family time. With Mommy and Daddy's work and then our stuff…And Bumps had to go see the doctor."

That much Jack had noticed. There didn't seem to be as many movie nights or game nights. He couldn't remember the last time they'd all gone to the park together as a family or had a picnic on the basement floor just for the fun of it. "How long have they been fighting?"

He felt both of his sisters shrug. AJ ducked her head against his shoulder. "Nat's said her mommy and daddy fought a lot before they..."

Jack swallowed thickly. "Divorced?"

He felt AJ nod against his shoulder.

"Are Mommy and Daddy going to do dat?" Kate asked quietly, curling tighter into him.

"Of course not," Jack replied, aiming for reassurance.

AJ sniffled. "Can we stay here?" she asked. "I don't wanna hear Mommy and Daddy yelling anymore."

"Yeah," Jack agreed. "Come on. Under the covers."

Jack lay awake long after AJ and Kate had fallen asleep thinking. It wasn't like Emily and his dad to have fights that their children could hear. He wasn't stupid, and at fourteen, he wasn't disillusioned enough to think that parents didn't fight. He couldn't remember his own parents fighting, but as he'd grown up his parents had been more open about their own divorce. He knew they'd fought a lot prior to splitting up. But at the same time, Jack couldn't remember seeing two people more in love than Emily and his father. They always seemed that way. They loved each other because of their good things, and their faults. So why were they fighting?

Emily woke the next morning, wrapped in her husband's arms, but to a very quiet house. She sighed and snuggled into him, knowing it was a Thursday, but unwilling to get up and face the day. She hated it when they fought about stupid things and she knew she'd picked the fight. She'd been stressed. Her father had been hospitalized three weeks ago because of a heart attack and she'd been faced with the terrifying reality of living without her father. Adding to that just general life stress of raising three young children and missing her husband because they always seemed to be so incredibly busy... Emily had snapped. But they'd made a promise when they made their vows to try their very best not to go to bed angry at each other when they could try and fix it instead.

She smiled as she felt Aaron's lips brush her shoulder. "Morning sweetheart."

She turned in his arms. "Good morning." She sighed. "I'm sorry."

"It's over," he told her. "We both said things we didn't mean."

They had. It was an unfortunate inevitability when they fought, but they had apologized the night before too. Things said in the heat of the moment were rarely meant but could be just as painful. She looked up at him with earnest eyes. "You don't teach today, right?"

"I'd been planning on going into the office to do some marking. Why?"

"Is your marking at home?" she asked, rolling him and herself so she straddled his waist. She felt heat start to coil in her belly when his eyes darkened and his hands came up to bracket her hips.

"Yes."

She leaned down and kissed him softly, arching into his body when his hand slipped under the tank top she wore to sleep in, stroking her lower back. "Let's stay home."

They didn't do this type of thing every time they fought because both of them felt that they had responsibilities during the day that didn't always include their family. Night time and weekends were for family and only family. Ninety-nine percent of the time.

"I'll help you mark," she cajoled against his mouth.

He chuckled into hers. "No you won't. You'll watch some terrible soap while I read papers."

She pulled back and rolled her eyes. "It was a one-time offer."

"And I missed the boat," he said, still laughing slightly. Then his face turned serious and his hand slid up and down her side, dipping into the curve of her waist between breasts and hip. "I think it's a great idea. A day to ourselves."

Emily knew her smile was blinding and she could feel the excitement welling up in her stomach at the thought of spending the day together, just the two of them. They hadn't had that in a long time, and though she loved her children, she was a firm believer that if she and Aaron didn't take time for themselves, they often ended up fighting. Usually they were better than that, catching the feelings creeping in early and rectifying the situation before there was an explosion. This time, they hadn't been that lucky.

"Kids or breakfast?" she asked, leaning down to kiss him quickly before rolling out of bed.

"Breakfast," he replied. "A big one."

She heard him get out of bed and pretended to shuffle through her dresser until he wrapped his arms around her from behind.

"I love you," he said, kissing her head.

"I love you, too," she answered quietly, contentedly.

He let her go reluctantly as she pulled out a pair of lounge pants and a long-sleeved tee-shirt. She heard him leave and smiled to herself. It was moments like that morning that made her think everything would always be okay with them. Bickering and teasing was normal, but there was nothing both of them hated more than when they were fighting. With a contented smile, she stripped out of her pyjamas and pulled on her clothes before heading off down the hall. The first stop was three-year-old Seth's room. She smiled affectionately as she saw his small form curled up in the very corner of his bed. He slept like the dead, and always as close to the wall as he possibly could. She sat down on the edge, reaching out to stroke his head.

"Seth, it's time to get up, honey," she said, carefully pulling the blankets away from his small body.

Her little boy whined and tried to bury his head further into the blankets and away from his mother's voice and touch. "No."

Emily chuckled. "Yes. Come on, up." This time, she rolled him carefully and lifted him into her arms. This was a normal routine with them. Seth was not a morning boy. He buried his head in her neck as she wandered over to where his clothes had been laid out the night before. With three, sometimes four kids to get ready and out the door, she and Aaron prepared as much at night as they possibly could. It made it easier to get them out the door. She dropped his clothes to the floor, slowly lowering them both down. This was a normal routine and she had it down to a science after almost a year and a half of doing it. PJ pants were quickly exchanged for real pants and the same was done on top. She sat him in her lap while she slid his socks on his little feet, then carried him downstairs where he'd cling to Aaron's leg while she woke the girls.

But there were no girls to be found. She tried to tamp down her panic as she rushed out of Kate's room having found AJ's empty. Sometimes, her girls ended up in the same bed together and while she'd recognized that it was most often the days she and Aaron fought – and she'd realized that they were being loud enough to wake the children and felt horribly guilty every time – they'd never both disappeared from their rooms before.

"Aaron?"

"Yes, honey?"

"Are the girls downstairs?" she called down as she raced from their rooms.

He met her in the hallway, Seth in his arms. "No. They're not upstairs?"

Emily shook her head, trying her best not to absolutely lose it. "Their beds are messy. So they slept in them... and didn't make them..."

"Okay, okay," he said, coming and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "They wouldn't leave the house."

Which was what worried her. AJ and Kate would never leave the house on their own. Ever.

"Morning." Jack looked a little worse for wear as he stumbled up the stairs from his basement room. He was already dressed, though his hair was a mess.

"Have you seen your sisters?" Aaron asked immediately, rubbing his hand on Emily's upper arm.

Jack nodded and Emily felt herself deflate. "They're downstairs. They came down last night."

Guilt hit Emily full force and as she looked up at her husband, she could tell he was feeling the same. They'd never let their fights get that bad before, but between his teaching and her rather stressful last six weeks, they hadn't found time to just sit and talk. They were adults, they could talk out most of their problems. And the ones that really peeved them off... well, they were usually much, much better at keeping their anger to a low hiss. But there had been yelling last night.

Jack cocked his head to the side. "They heard you fighting. Everything okay?"

Emily knew there were two reasons for Jack to be asking the question. The fourteen-year-old knew that his parents had fought before their divorce and Jack worried about his siblings. He called often when he wasn't around, just to talk to them. He was a good brother like that. So she left the safe comforting haven of her husband's arm to hug the boy that may not have been hers by blood, but she still loved and cared deeply for. She shot her husband a look as she headed down the stairs, and he nodded. He would handle Jack. She would go get her girls.

She sighed as she stood in the doorway of Jack's room and looked at them both. They were curled up in little balls – Jack's bed really wasn't big enough for three people, even if two of them were little girls – both of them with eyes closed. She could tell by AJ's breathing that she wasn't quite back to sleep yet, but the rise and fall of Kate's chest was even. Her youngest daughter had always had an easier time falling asleep than her oldest. She perched on the end of the bed, reaching over to stroke AJ's back.

"Annie, it's morning."

Identical brown eyes were filled with fear when they met hers and AJ curled in on herself a little tighter. "Five more minutes?"

"No, sweetheart. Time to get up." Then she reached over for Kate who, in waking, tried to push herself up. Her little hand slipped down the small space between the wall and Jack's bed and before Emily could catch her, her little face impacted the wall. Emily held her breath as the wail came. With a sigh, she slid up Jack's messy bed until she sat between her girls and pulled Kate into her lap. Emily rubbed her daughter's back and placed the requisite, if extra soft, kiss on her nose. Then she waited for Kate to calm down before asking the question on her mind.

"Why did you guys sleep down here?"

AJ wouldn't look at her and the guilt gnawed just a little harder at her stomach. She and Aaron had taught their kids not to lie to their parents. Lying made the situation worse, not better. "You and Daddy were fighting."

The gnawing got worse. "I'm sorry you heard us, sweetheart." She hugged Kate closer to her chest. "Both of you. We shouldn't have been talking so loud."

"You were yelling," Kate said with a sniffle. Her nose still ached from where she'd bumped it.

Emily brushed the tears off of her daughter's cheeks. "I'm so sorry, honey."

As she looked over to AJ, she noticed her oldest still wouldn't meet her gaze. "Annie?"

The seven-year-old bit her lip. Chewed it, actually, which was one of the most telling quirks that meant she was really upset. She made a mental note to talk to Aaron about this never happening again. Children could always sense tension. She'd bet that at least subconsciously, their kids had felt the fight coming.

"Mommy, are you and Daddy going to split up?" she asked in a little voice.

Emily felt tears come to her eyes. "No, honey. No we're not. Even Mommies and Daddies fight sometimes."

Her first baby sniffled. "But when Mommies and Daddies fight, one of them goes away. That's what all my friends say."

Emily reached out for AJ, pulling her snugly to her side. "Fighting is normal, honey. Both of you. I love your daddy with everything in me. I couldn't live without him."

"Then why are you fighting?" Kate asked, her cheek pillowed over her mother's heart. The steady beat was calming to her and always had been. To all of her children.

"Sometimes we fight," Emily replied quietly. "We try to make sure you can't hear it. Sometimes things pile up and the only way to deal with it is to fight about it." She jostled them both. "Look at me, girls."

They did, with fearful, watery eyes.

"When your daddy and I got married, we promised to death til us part," she said seriously. "And we both take that very seriously. There's going to be rough patches. There's going to be times where we fight, but we always promised each other we would never go to bed angry. Your daddy isn't going anywhere and neither am I, okay?"

"Promise?" Kate asked in a quiet voice.

She hugged both of her girls. "I promise." She hugged them tighter for another moment. "Come on. Time to get up and go to school."

"Can't we stay home today?" Kate asked with a whine.

"No," Emily replied chuckling. Though she and Aaron were taking the day off, and as much as she loved her children, they needed the time together. She made another mental note to talk to Aaron about taking the kids away. A family weekend, away from everything. Maybe her parents' place.

"But Mommy!"

"No 'but Mommy's today," Emily said. "Go on, get dressed. Maybe, if you ask him nicely, Daddy'll drive you to school."

She smiled as they both scampered out of the room.

Aaron smiled as he closed and locked the front door behind him. Emily sat on the couch, still in her loungewear, watching some sort of morning talk show. They were a guilty pleasure of hers, one she rarely, if ever, got to indulge in. He slid onto the couch beside her, wrapping her up in his arms. The day after a fight was often the hardest for them both because they wanted nothing more than to reaffirm that everything was okay. While sex was often a way to fix that, he knew they both felt that there were other ways. Cuddling was one of them and he sighed in contentment as Emily snuggled deeper into his arms. After a few moments, she shifted, meeting his eyes.

"Did Jack tell you why Annie and Katie were down with him?"

Aaron sighed. That had been a painful few moments in his life. Never in a million years would he want to give his children the illusion that he and Emily were having problems they couldn't eventually solve. Sure, some of them took work and time, but they tried to solve them to the best of their abilities. Or at the very least compromise around them.

"Jack said they heard us yelling. That they got scared."

"They thought we were considering divorce, Aaron."

The raw pain in her voice made him shift her, moving her until she was sitting on his knees. He ignored the ache in old injuries and over-used muscles in favour of looking her right in the eye, his hands linked behind her back, hers resting around his neck. "Neither of us meant for that to happen." He knew he had to tread on thin ice. The pain alone wasn't always enough to clue him into what she was thinking. Whatever it was, he knew it went deeper than that.

"What kind of parents make their kids think they're going to split up?" she asked quietly, her fingers stroking the hair at the nape of his neck. "How could we do that to them?"

Aaron stroked her back. He'd asked himself the same question over his conversation with a concerned Jack. The only thing he'd been able to do was reassure his son that he wasn't about to add a second divorce to his life. One was enough, and it wasn't like he didn't worship the ground Emily walked on. He loved her with everything in him. But that was the best reassurance he could give his son. "We didn't do it deliberately, sweetheart."

She sighed. "I know, but it still hurts. We try so hard to protect them..."

"What's important is that neither of us have plans to go anywhere," he said, reaching up to cup her cheek. "All we can do is tell them that. Fighting is normal, even though I hate fighting with you."

"I hate fighting with you, too," she replied with a small smile. "And that's exactly what I said to the girls. We're not going anywhere. But I guess one of their friends' parents went through a fighting stage..."

"This isn't a stage, Emily. We had a fight. It's over now. It's in the past." He pulled her forward, sealing his mouth to hers, hoping to wash away the pain she was feeling. It didn't always work, but he had a whole arsenal of things that were likely to cheer her up. He'd been with her too long not to.

She rested her forehead on his as she pulled away. "In the past. Got it," she promised. She slid off of his lap, cuddling into his side instead.

He pulled her tight, kissing her head with a smile. They really should have done this sooner. He'd started to miss her with all the time they'd both been spending at the office recently. He rested his head on hers. "I love you, Emily Hotchner."

She kissed his neck gently. "I love you too, Aaron Hotchner."

I'll put this in order later. It'll go about chapter 8, for those looking for the timeline.......