a/n: Sorry guys I mixed up my chapters. The chapter originally posted as chapter 2 was Alice but thats actually chapter 4. Sorry. I hope you like this chapter don't forget to review i want to know hw to improve =]

Edwards POV

If I had a heart It would have stopped beating, I felt like my head had been put through a paper shredder. I wanted to die. As I thrashed around the grass in the medow, I could just hear jacob's thoughts as he kissed my Bella

Wow, And Cullen was actualy stupid enough to leave her!

He was right I was stupid I had the most amazing girl in the world love me and this is what I done pushed her in to the arms of someone else, who by all standards wasn't even a person he was a warewolf. I stood up it took all the strenght I had to peel myself off the grass and struggle on with my now pointless, black, empty excistance. But my family needed me I ran to where I heard Carlisles voice he was telling Sue what to do.

"Don't give him spicy or greesy foods, make sure the only thing he drinks is water and if there is anything else call me, Myslef and Edward are staying in Port Angles for the next few days I will check in reguraly to see that every thing is ok,"
"Thank you so much ," Sue couldn't say it fast enough she was tripping over her words.

I got in the car and waited.

"Why?" was all he said, I simply shook my head and said "You really don't want to know."

"You can tell me if you want to but if you don't I wont pry." He was utterly sincre in his words but I could say nothing so I shook my head again.

We got back to the hotel and went to our rooms.

"Goodnight Edward." he said as he closed his door behind him I went into the dismal room it was very plain, wide double bed, faided pink carpet, shower, and all the bathroom esssentials were in an an-suit left of the front door.

A loud shrill buzzing was coming from my bag I walked over to it and meekly looked at the tiny silver phone in my hand, there was 10 missed calles from Alice and 5 text messages. I started with the messages.

4 of them said "Dont forget if you want to talk I know how you feel."

And the last one was the longest "Edward i'm so sorry, she didn't mean it, she didn't know he was going to do that, I know she didn't stop but that doen't mean she doesn't regret it, before you ask if I can see that I cant her fait is mingled with theirs now and I can't see her anymore. but that doen'tmean she isn't there don't do anything stupid!"

I shut the phone I wasn't intersed in anything anymore what was the point.

I had to see her ont last time and then I would leave forever and I would never come back. With out even thinking about it I was running away from the hotel in the direction of Forks. I got to her house and was about to climb up the tree when a growl came from behind me, it was somthing i had never heard before I turned not caring what or who this creature was or what it was going to do to me, but if it touched Bella it wouldn't exist anymore.

I was facing a huge red,brown wolf its teeth inches from my face.

"Jacob?" I said astounded that he'd actually changed I thought the line had died out with Ephraim odviously not.

The wolf growled and stalked into the forest before I could move Jacob the person came through the forset back the way the wolf had went.

"Why are you here?!" He growled not louder than a whisper. When I didn't emeditly respond he took that as his opertunity to 'Protect' Bella he put himslef between me and the house.

"I have to see her," I managed to choke out.

"You had your chance and you left, she doesn't want you anymore." he spat. his words were not the hardest part of that senctance it was the truth behind them she really didn't want me. Hurt, unimiginable pain thretened to rip right through my chest I fought it back.

"What makes you so sure," I knew his words were true but still I didn't want to believe any of them

"Did you not see us today she kissed me first." He said proudly as if it was an accomplishment. The words tore through me I knew he was right and to prove his point he replayed it to me through his mind as if his words wernt bad enough.

"You had your chance and you blew it," he said in frustration at my scilence.

Knowing that I had lost my Bella, my angel the very person that gave meaning to my existence, was simply too much to bare, her beautiful face was carved into my eyelids so every time I closed my eyes, I could be reminded of this lovely creature.

"Your right but you will never have what wehad We are made for each other."I hissed furious that my words were true but they ment very little.

"Is that so?"he said smiling as he produced a little black book from his pocket, I reconized it instantly. It was Bella's jourmal I'd seen her write in it many times but never read it I always pulled myself away from the thought, letting her have her privacy. But he was just flipping through it like any other book it really didn't matter to him weither it was private or not he was truly a monster, he was not worth Bella's love!

Before he could say anything he was reading out the last page that was written on.

WOW! That was all it said.

"You and my Bella!" I hissed through my teeth,

"No not yours mine,"He corrected. I was about to pounce on him to rip, to kill, I wanted to cause him as much pain as he'd caused me. I heard her then muttering something in her sleep so clear it was almost like she was awake only the slow rythme of her heart told me she was asleep."I'm sorry Edward" My mind was blank I couldn't think, I couldn't breathe."You have to let me go I'm sorry" she screamed then and it sent shivvers down my spine "Help me Jacob"she cried through her muffled screems of terror. Horror surged through me, what had I done, what was I doing in her dream to make her scream like that, I hated myself truly hated myself for hurting her. Just I thought that she spoke again. "No Jake it's alright he wont hurt me" Me? "No stop it Jake don't hurt him!" She screemed again.

I noticed from the corner of my eye Jacob slowly walking into the forest, I followed,"Where are you going help her"I called after him.

"I am I just need to find out how!" he sat down on the mossy ground when a howl ripped through the air

"Shit!" Jacob cursed under his breath , He phased instantly and as soon as he had done that I saw why the urgency was needed. The body of a tourist had been found in one of the caves off the beach, completly drained of it's blood.

With out really thinking about it I was in the room I had stored away but somthing was different wrong, it was neat tidy nothing out of place,surly this wasn't bellas room. But there she lay tossing and turning, screeming in her sleep. I had done enough dammage no matter how hard it was for me I would NOT let this be any harder for her. I jumped down from the window and was about to run when somthing caught my eye, it was the light of the moon glinting off a small balck leather journal. I slipped it into my pocket and ran. I ran to the hotel I went stright to Carlisle and told him of the wolfs andthe dead human. I told him I had to leave and when he asked why I told him the same thing as before.

"I'm not strong enough" I knew if I stayed any longer I would never be able to leave, I needed her to much. I grbbed my bags and ordered a taxi-I would have run but needed more time to think. As I slid into the back of the taxi the small phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled out the contence of the pocket -my phone and Bellas journal, I set it on the eat next to me as I answered the phone.

"Hello Alice"

"Edward, Edward her journal," that was all I heard before the call cut off.