A/N: What do you think of fanfic being down? Kinda made responding to reviews hard, but here you go. It's midnight, I can post. Love me?

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JPOV

"So, your client has been back to work for a while now. Have you made any progress with his training?"

Eleazar's question brought images of Edward in my sweatpants to mind. I suppressed a sigh and considered how our run had gone as well as the fact that he was learning to be honest with me. Then a grin grew, unintended, as I thought of how he'd startled as I reached for more popcorn. Edward was becoming hyper-aware of my proximity.

"By your smile, I'd say yes. Do you know that I can't remember the last time I saw you smile? Perhaps the day I collared you to help you feel safe once more... No, not even then. It must have been the day Alice decided that she and Laurent were up for some play sessions with you. Having her back in your life changed you, for the better of course."

I looked at my one-time captor and now closest confidante. Age seemed to have made him even more attractive. Pushing forty five, he was still as trim as most men half his age. The daily regimen of running, avoiding refined sugar products, and otherwise being entirely too granola for my tastes has served him well. His Spanish blood is prevalent in his features. Eleazar's hair was jet black, thick and slightly waved. He kept it close cropped and I knew his vanity had him tinting his temples dark whenever a hint of gray showed through. His facial hair was always immaculately trimmed.

Carmen, his twenty four/seven collared sub of a wife always took care of his hair and goatee each morning. They had developed quite the elaborate ritual since he found her in Aro's slave room. Aro had told us she was a gift from his training facility to ours. He said she would help support the new subs so that they would be molded faster and able to withstand Aro's demands faster.

Assured of her loyalty, we allowed her access to our two dormitories. One held subs and a few flat out slaves that Aro was aware of. We maintained proper paperwork on them. Each came to us willingly through friends or other subs. Except for the slaves, they came directly from Aro. Some we found and Eleazar convinced to join us. Then there was Edward. He's something new. He will be my crown jewel of the whole ordeal.

Our other dormitory is closer to my home in an apartment building that Alice holds the deed for under her name. The subs that aren't ready to mainstream with their outside life stay there, expenses paid, as long as they are behaving well. Aro knows nothing of them and neither do the other subs. When Emily and Isabel were still here with us, they stayed in the dormitory Aro was aware of, although more often than not they stayed at one of our homes.

Now they are both watching Aro for us and will report to me on my next trip to Italy which is coming up soon. Aro wants to ensure that I still know who holds the power in our relationship. I can still bow my head, although I'm finding that the reigns are becoming harder to bear.

Soon, we'll be able to take our subs up against his and take over his position in our world. Gone will be the days of forced submission and kidnapping beautiful teens and plying them with gifts until their eighteenth birthday when they are suddenly collared. Eleazar and I will abolish the practice of kidnapping wealthy politician's children to add millions to our bank account in ransom to release them.

Corrine. I haven't thought of her in ages. It's all her fault I got into this in the first place.

"Corrine Stevens, daughter of prominent Republican Senator Joshua Stevens, has been kidnapped by a slave ring based on American soil. Your mission is to get in, get her out, and then find what we need to shut Maria down."

Those were the last words I heard from my senior officer before I was handed a folder with everything I'd need to know and plane tickets out of my once semi-sane life as a profiler. Turns out the FBI didn't do their research properly. Corrine had gone willingly, she wanted to disobey Daddy and this was her way to rebel. Senator Stevens flipped out, could not believe his good little girl would do something like that and had two agents storm the building. They ended up dead so I was called on to offer my expertise.

After four months of setting myself out as bait, I was brought in and broken down. After my training was complete I was finally allowed with other subs and found Corrine, enjoying her life in the lap of luxury. She'd serve breakfast to Maria and any guests in the main dining room and then laze about in the hot tubs of the dormitory the rest of the day. She considered the occasional whipping and sexual servicing worth the lack of effort she had to put into her day.

Now the poor girl is in an asylum. Turns out her loving father was worried she'd spill the beans about having sought out entrance into a slave ring. A few hundred thousand dollars as a bribe to the right physician and she's diagnosed as mentally unstable from the atrocities committed to her by Maria. The few moments of the day she's not too drugged to speak, the staff just assume that her brain is addled from the pain inflicted upon her.

If Aro had just kept his training facility off of American soil, I never would have been involved. As long as he stays in Italy and has his slave ring operating away from here, the United States Government turns a blind eye. Aro and his brothers have men everywhere so we have to be careful at who we let in to our private program. I alone have thirty subs who will kneel only for me. When the time is right and the funds are there, we'll make our move.

"Where did you go, Jasper? I've been talking for a few minutes and your eyes are glazed."

"Memories of how I entered this world."

Eleazar waved his hand and I switched from jacking him off to sucking him. His sandalwood soap added an exotic scent to his also closely trimmed pubic hair. He smelled like everything that was not America to me. He was far away lands, spices, and freedom. My own hands were bound at the wrist before me, resting between his legs now.

I worked his cock the way I wanted my own sucked, hard and fast with just a hint of teeth at times. He let out a groan and my tongue was gifted with a sudden burst of his precum. I released him to the air momentarily, my tongue lapping up the fluid. Once gone, I kissed and licked down his cock until my tongue met his balls, teasing them before working back to his head. With a last slow lick around the head I took him back into my mouth, all the way down.

"Oh my, you haven't forgotten what I like." Eleazar's head thumped back against the wall of his sauna, the hot steam surrounding us. "Yes, you are my fortunate little pet when you wish you be. I so love seeing your rugged southern boy charm on your knees before me. Mmmmm. It's been too long."

I loved watching him like this, when my role as friend was left behind for cherished sub. He would still speak freely but there would be punishment if I did not perform well. The moment his hand gave me a directive, I went from a friend helping out another friend with some morning wood while his wife was off with their children, to a sub pleasing his master.

Eleazar's cock nudged the back of my throat and I focused on taking shallow breaths as his hips pumped my face. My tongue wrapped around his slender but long shaft as I moved upon him, flicking and tantalizing his cock all over.

His hands tugged my hair, pulling me into a rhythm he liked. In our years together, I already knew what he wanted, but I could never stop my love of having him tug my hair. It always brought my cock to attention.

"Yes, my pet, you like this, don't you? Mmm. There. Do you remember our first time after Maria?"

I hummed around his cock. Eleazar came to me and spilled it all. From Aro wanting Maria gone but not knowing how without implicating himself down to how Eleazar and Aro goaded me into snapping. It was all their plan. Had I not taken her out, Eleazar was going to do it himself. He just wishes that he had been able to find me sooner and avoid a lot of my resurfacing trauma after my escape.

A psychologist who was on Aro's payroll alerted them of my presence and Eleazar swooped in on me. Here we are pushing eight years later and I'm now his head trainer. He's the one who taught me how to breathe again. He holds my collar loosely but I cannot wait for the day I do not wear one at all. Eleazar does not believe that day will come. He is concerned that I won't be able to take being unbound and free, without a master.

I increased my suction as I thought of a younger Eleazar collaring me and bending me over his lap. After he'd paddled me, I was thrown to the floor and he took me from behind. He was not an unkind master and he used an abundant use of lubricant, unlike Maria had with her toys. I'd made a mess of the floor, my stomach, and chest that night as I came while he fucked my ass. Since then I've learned a little more restraint.

"Shit!"

My face met his pubic bone as Eleazar slammed me down into his lap, his cock as far in as possible. I could feel jet after jet of his hot cum splash against my throat. Making a few motions of swallowing, he groaned before pulling me off of him.

"Good boy. Now, go see Kasey to get some relief of your own before you go to work."

"Yes, sir."

Eleazar kissed me gently, his cum still flavoring my mouth. "You really are my best, Jasper. Now, go have fun and no more of this 'sir' crap today."

He slapped my ass as I stood up and then he reached for my wrists, flipping loose the knot that bound me. The moment his cock had come out, I had lifted my wrists for the binding. We didn't have my wrists tied together so much for the bondage aspect, it truly made it easier. When bound, I just pump my hands together by raising and lowering my arms without having to work much. He'd never say it during our morning meets but he enjoys seeing me bound before him.

Our relationship was always this tumultuous. One moment we were horny friends talking about life, the next we were fucking as I called him 'master' or 'sir' depending on if he had me collared or not. If it was impromptu, he was 'sir'. If I was bound in that hideous studded leather band he made me wear, he was my 'master' and I could expect to leave sore.

I was on my way to the hospital after a session with Kasey where we had tried out Eleazar's latest toy. I'd been with him when he ordered the standing cage with cuffs and waist belt that can hold the sub at any desired position, even upside down. I ended up suspending her horizontally, spread out so that she was parallel to the floor right at the height to be plowed into. I was kind and brought out a small table with a pillow so she could rest her weight onto it and not be in pain afterwards.

I made an appointment with Eleazar's "secretary" to have Kasey and the cage set aside for me next week for a more thorough investigation of possible positions. Then I'd see if she could properly submit for my pleasure, not just for mutual enjoyment. I rarely take out my sexual frustration on a sub but Edward is driving me to a new level of tension. If I could just get some sort of a breakthrough with him. I need to find a way for him to implicitly trust me.

I'd showered there at the house with Eleazar's newest male sub to wash me. He was a lovely young man from the Quileute Reservation, an area a few hours away along the coast. Seth was fresh faced and eager to please, a combination Eleazar and I both enjoyed, numerous times, as we broke him in.

Eleazar had found him on the streets of Seattle a few months after Seth's father had died. He'd lost his sense of self and Eleazar was there to help him find his way back to a stable life once more. Within our facility, he was primarily our bathroom attendant although he was always happy to aid us with more hand-on methods of relaxation.

He was larger than most men, his shoulders broad and his chest something out of a gym training magazine yet still natural, not muscle bound. Seth had led me into Eleazar's large shower room- a ten by ten room that was just one large tile shower. He had turned on the taps and waited for it to warm before removing my robe.

I was long since used to the routine although was not used to his infectious enthusiasm for every activity. I know that I keep in good shape but damn did that boy stroke my ego, among other things, while bathing me. If he was going to stay with Eleazar for long, I may have to spend more Monday breakfasts with Eleazar.

Perhaps I could even see about him accompanying me on my upcoming trip to Italy. I can't take any of our females or they won't come back. Seth is not Aro's type so I would not need to worry about losing him.

The hospital loomed ahead of me suddenly. I had been driving on autopilot while thinking of Seth and his extremely warm hands. I pulled into parking lot and headed towards the physician and staff parking. Edward's car was parked beside Bella's, his immaculately clean as if a new car, hers looking a little more lived in.

Edward has been back to work for a few weeks now and today is his first day leading a surgery. Hospital policy was that any physician out for an extended leave after a patient death needed to assist with several surgeries to ease them back into the environment. Today, Edward has to face his last fear, being the one to hold the scalpel.

We went for an extra run last night. He'd called me having a mild panic attack, not sure he could handle this but not wanting to tell Bella he was afraid. I showed up on his doorstep not twenty minutes later, made my apologies to Bella for interrupting their evening and asked Edward if he could go for a run with me.

We ran, did some deep breathing exercises, and then I helped him stretch out in the basement before leaving. Edward was no longer scared of taking his shirt off around me, three weeks of routine was helping him to feel comfortable. After helping him cool down and stretch, I gave him another neck massage, something else he's come to enjoy.

Bella had asked if I could show her what I do differently but I played it off as just being stronger. I rather enjoy having something I can do for Edward, something I can do better than anyone else. When speaking with Garrett, Eleazar's second in command, he seemed amused at my dedication to my patient. Any other sub would have been cut loose long ago as a lost cause. But I know he's going to be something else once I can break through his walls.

Now, three floors and several walls will separate us. Mondays mean checking on my inpatient clients. I parked near my clinic's entrance and ran inside, dodging Jessica while she was making coffee. My phone's light was flashing so it meant that one of four people had left me a message. Please don't let it be Aro or Dr. Cullen, the Chief of Staff, not his son. Only they along with Bella and Edward have my direct extension, everyone else goes through Jessica first.

I logged in to my voice mail while unlocking my desk to grab my pre-printed forms. As soon as I found out what was needed, I'd take off for my rounds. I was pleasantly surprised to hear Bella's voice play back to me.

"Jasper, it's Bella Cullen. I was hoping if you're free around eleven thirty today that we could meet for lunch in cafeteria. I wanted to talk to you about Edward's progress. My extension is four three five eight. Thank you!"

I picked up the phone and called her back, agreeing that eleven thirty should be fine and told her to have me paged or to send a text to my pager from her email account should anything change. She seemed relieved which worried me. As his first morning properly back in surgery, I could only guess how stressed Edward was today. Perhaps on my rounds I could pop in and wish him well if he wasn't already in the OR.

I took care of the isolation room patients first, noting new medication levels where necessary. I was able to start the process of releasing one patient to go onto the less restricted mental health ward as she was much more stable. We would need another psych evaluation by a physician she was not used to in case she was carefully wording her responses to gain her exit from lock down and suicide watch.

Finally at ten thirty I was over to Edward. He had just finished up a surgery as the assistant for his last time and after completing his dictation, he'd be on break for twenty minutes before scrubbing up. Apparently it was just a routine lap chole, removal of the gallbladder through tiny incisions, something he'd done several times before the incident.

"How are you feeling Edward?"

"A little nervous but I've been working on the visualization techniques you've been walking me through. They're helping. I know I can do this."

"I know you can too, Edward. You're a brilliant surgeon, you'll be fine."

Edward beamed at my praise. I clapped him on the shoulder and walked with him down the hall to his office. After he was inside, I made sure he had my pager number on him.

"If you need anything, just call me on my cell or page me. I'm going to check on two patients and then I'm off to lunch. I'll stay in this building until around one. After that, I'm just a basement tunnel walk away. I don't have any patients until three and then I'll be in the office with appointments until seven. But if you need anything, you call and I'll be there. One of my associates can handle whatever I can't reschedule. You're my priority."

He gave me a crooked smile, disarming me slightly. I hadn't seen this one before. It wasn't his usual dazzling smile full of perfect sparkling teeth. This smile was relaxed and comfortable but warm. It felt like it was just for me. I found myself quickly returning his smile and then stepping back. Keep your distance Jasper, he's a patient first, sub second. He's not yours to fall for.

"Check in with me after, doctor's orders."

Edward gave me a mock salute and sat down at his desk. I watched as he closed his eyes and drifted off into his own world before walking away. I still had time to drop off my files at my office and then meet Bella at her office for lunch.

Jessica was on the phone with an insurance company when I walked in. She gave me her fake peppy smile as I looked over at the stack of mail for me. Damn. I really didn't want to deal with more paperwork. Fuck it. It would wait until tonight. I unlocked my office, checked my email, verified my vacation time with Human Resources and then closed up.

"Jess, I'm off to lunch. I'm going to be over in the main building until just before my appointment. If anything comes up, you know how to reach me. If for any reason I'm paged, you'll get the duplicate on the office email. Forward any appointments I can't make to Dr. Jans. He's free this afternoon and doing overflow office hours for emergency appointments."

"Sure thing Dr. Whitlock. You know I can keep it all under control. That's why they hired me."

No, they hired you because you were fucking the son of the human resources rep you talked to. I gave her a nod and took off down the stairs to the basement walkway. The hallway was the same beige painted cement blocks as the main hospital, but there wasn't a pretty border or paintings to cover them. The dull yellow lights over head did nothing to make it a cheery walk. Seeing as there were only five offices across the street and patients normally parked near our building if they wanted to see one of us, the doctors were the only ones really using it.

I took the elevator in the hospital's basement up to the business office's floor where Carlisle's suite was held. Bella was grabbing her coat and talking animatedly to Alice. The stack of folders Alice was holding was nearly as tall as she was.

"Hey Alice. What are you doing over here with Bella? Aren't you supposed to be off counseling some patient?"

"Oh shush. I'm on break. You know those fifteen minute things we get twice a day but you never take? Bella was just telling me how much Edward has improved since you started treating him. I knew you'd be able to help. You're the best."

I rolled my eyes but gave Alice a smile when she pouted. Her lips quickly turned up into a smile and she set her files down on Bella's desk. I was surprised she could actually carry them all at once.

"These are for you and Dr. C. anyways. These are cases he needs to oversee by next week. I was over in Managed Care checking on some issues with one of my patients. Their manager handed these to me for Carlisle to sign off on. She seemed to think you wouldn't yell as loudly at me for bringing them."

That's the truth. No one can stay mad at Alice. She's just too... Alice. She's bubbly, caring, funny, loyal, and tenacious.

"They're going to have to wait for me to process them later, Alice. I have a lunch date with Jasper."

Alice turned to me with questions in her eyes.

"She wants to discuss Edward's progress with me, well, what HIPPA and patient/doctor confidentiality allow anyways." I leaned down to Alice and brushed my lips across her ear. "You know you're the only girl for me Ali-cat, ring or no ring."

She looked down at her right hand. Alice and Laurent had been hinting at becoming proper subs but neither could afford several weeks off of work for the first training sessions and I didn't know if Alice could properly turn off her feelings for me. If she couldn't separate Jasper, former boyfriend and sometimes lover from Jasper, her Dominator, there would be serious issues when she mainstreamed and would occasionally deal with me outside of the Dominant and Submissive world. The Jasper she loved and still holds affection for would be gone the moment the ring is on her finger.

"Bella, are you ready? I know Dr. Cullen has a meeting with the department heads at twelve thirty so you need to be back here by then."

Bella nodded and wished Alice goodbye. I offered her my arm, smiling at Alice as we left. Her minor flash of jealousy was amusing me. I'd have to explore that later as she didn't show any jealousy when I was with Laurent, or even when she walked in on me with Emily a few months ago.

The two of us took the elevator to the first floor, a rather tense silence between us. I would have to walk a fine line between what I could tell her and what I could not. When we are at their home, with Edward present, it is much easier as our relationship is casual. Here, I am definitely a physician and her husband is my patient. Confidentiality must be maintained.

We went through the line, smiling at her as she gaped at my chicken tenders, country gravy, and fries all piled onto one plate. She grabbed a salad, lemonade, and a cup of soup. As we waited for the cashier to ring our meals through to our accounts, Bella kept looking down at my tray.

"What? You've been looking at my tray like it's going to attack you."

"Have not. Ok, maybe I have. But it's attacking your cholesterol. Just looking at it is raising mine by a few points."

Bella's eyes met mine and she quickly ducked her head. I was suddenly hit with a warm breeze scented with strawberries. Bella had stepped in front of the air vent, her hair flew out in front of her face. Her nose crinkled as the hair brushed it. She quickly side stepped and tamed her hair down, tucking it behind her ears.

"I'll run it off and besides, I eat my oatmeal every morning to make up for it."

"Oh great, you get to eat chicken strips, fries, and gravy and then make my husband run it off with you."

I quickly handed the cashier my ID card and studied the machine as she swiped it. Carrying my tray, I walked over to the nearest empty table. Bella sat across from me, her lower lip drawn between her teeth.

"Jasper, I'm just teasing. Edward always comes back so much calmer after your runs with him. It's like he tenses up gradually as time goes on between your visits. Once he's seen you, he just relaxes and enjoys life. You're making a marked change on him."

"That's nice to know. I've been worried that I was pushing Edward too far. He has a very definite comfort zone and ever since our second visit I've been trying to push him beyond it. I want him to trust me with what's bothering him.

"I think in some ways, he trusts you more than he trusts me. I know he called you last night. Your cellphone was an outgoing call, not incoming. Did he call you?"

Smart woman. We'd have to be more careful if Edward wanted to avoid Bella's questioning. He could start with deleting his call log.

"I'm not at liberties to discuss my time with your husband starting from our first contact of each visit through my departure. We spoke, went for a run to clear our heads, and after discussing some lingering issues, we ran back to your home."

"But is he getting better? Is my Edward going to be okay?"

I reached across the table to take her hand. "Yes, it is my professional opinion that he's on the road to being back to a hundred percent soon. As a friend, I think that you'll have him back soon. Just give him time. He needs your support now more than ever."

"Can you tell me what treatment you're using that is working so well with him?"

How do I tell Bella that I'm biding my time and slowly breaking Edward down by dominating him? She's not aware of my lifestyle and for now it is easier that way. Eventually, she'll figure it out by the changes I will bring about in Edward and any demonstrations he makes. But for now, having her think me a physician with an interest in Eastern methods of treatment is better for all of us.

"The specific nature of my treatment changes from session to session. I tailor our activities specifically to his needs."

My pager went off in my pocket and I pulled it out. 911 ext8987. The operating room, Edward.

"I'm sorry, Bella, I really have to go. An emergency came up. Can we talk more later? I can stop by early for my next appointment and we can finish up, or call me anytime."

Bella started to interrupt and I heard her ask if it was Edward but I just stashed my half eaten tray on the conveyor belt to the washing staff and took off at a jog. My pace quickened to a sprint. I had to get to him. Edward needed me.

I ran faster than I thought possible, my chest burning, lungs heaving with their effort to keep my body oxygenated. I flashed my badge to the nurse at the triage desk and rounded the corner of the surgical unit. I ran down the hall to operating room seven from where he'd called. I could see him through the window to the clean up room, his back to me, head on the wall.

I slid my identification badge through the door lock and it clicked open. Edward turned to face me, tears in his eyes. His face was drawn, a ghostly gray.

"I couldn't do it... I cracked under pressure. I made the incisions. I even got all the instruments in place. But when it came time to cut free the gallbladder, I couldn't do it. I couldn't see anything but blood. It was pouring out of the cuts I'd made, welling up like from a fountain. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath but it was still there behind my eyes. I had to bow out and come here to breathe."

I took a good look at his hands. There was a small amount of blood on his gloves, but nothing out of the ordinary. I peeked through the glass to the operating room where the procedure was under way. The patient's vitals were just fine and there was no excessive blood.

"Edward, come here." I used a tone he wasn't used to, the one I used with new subs. I needed to take control of the situation, quickly, before it escalated to a full out panic attack.

"Look through the glass, what do you see?"

"Blood."

I let out a sharp breath. "Edward, come here." I waited until he walked over to me. "Good. Now look through the glass."

Edward tilted his head up to the glass but his eyes were closed. "There's just blood everywhere. Blood and beeping. It won't stop. All I can see is blood and all I hear is the incessant beeping of the monitors. I want it all to go away."

I reached over and started to rub his back, starting at his neck as a half-massage. I stroked his back softly before using a slight pressure to turn him. My hands moved to his temples, my fingers rubbing circles.

"It's okay, Edward. It will all be okay. I can assure you that there isn't blood everywhere. There's just the small amount right at the incisions and on the gloves. Why don't you open your eyes and take a look. For me?"

Edward brought up a hand and squeezed the bridge of his nose. I'd seen his father do the same thing a year ago while fighting with the board of trustees. It must be a Cullen trait. I would later find a way to wash the small streak of brownish red from his nose.

After lowering his arm, Edward finally opened his eyes. I put my hand on his shoulder and gave him a squeeze. I watched his face as he looked into the room.

"The patient's still breathing."

"Yes."

"I didn't kill him."

"No you didn't. You were doing a fine job Edward."

All of a sudden Edward sank down to the floor, his hands over his ears. "The beeping won't stop though. I can hear the zap of the paddles but nothing is working. I can hear the alarm going off as he flatlines. It won't stop. Make it stop, please make it stop. Jasper, please."

My mind began to race. I thought back on everything I've learned about him in the past five weeks. He is calmer as the sky darkens into night. Edward likes his world to be silent except for his music. Edward wants to be alone when he's upset. I had to find someplace quiet where he could rest. I needed someplace we wouldn't be overheard as I calmed him down. He needed a place where silence was guaranteed.

A sensory deprivation tank's silence would be perfect. I glanced down at my watch. The sleep study staff would be done with the daily cleaning and wouldn't have any patients until after dinner. It should be free.

I knelt beside Edward, taking his hands in my own. "I know a place that can make it stop. Do you feel like a short run. I'll try and let you win this time."

I kept his wrist loosely within my grasp and pulled him through the doors, running for the fourth floor sleep study department. I took him up the back stairs so that we would not run into any patients and fewer staff. He kept up, just a foot behind me, as we ran through the halls. I brought our pace down to a quick walk as we approached the right area. The paint went from tan and cream to a soft blue with darker indigo carpet. I stopped in front of a small glass door and waved to Janelle, one of the nurse practitioners who watches over the program. She pressed the button beside her on the table and the doors swung open.

"Jan, I have a patient who needs the tank. Can you squeeze us in?"

She looked at us both and then closed the door. "Sure. You do have the paperwork filled out, yes?"

"No but I will. Dr. Cullen would not be pleased if I didn't keep his son's file up to date."

"Oh, I didn't recognize you in your surgical scrubs. I assumed you were an inpatient. Sorry, Dr. Cullen."

Edward just continued to tense beneath my grip on his wrist.

"Please Janelle, it's urgent."

"Fine, just follow me."

We were led to a small door at the back of the hallway and into a locker room. A series of readouts were on the wall along with a panel of switches. Bathing suits in a range of sizes were on the top rack, a selection of small shorts on the bottom, towels in the middle.

"Thanks Janelle. I can take it from here. One hour, tops. I'll flip the interior switch if there's an emergency I can't handle." I waited until she left and then walked over to where Edward was standing, his eyes tightly shut, his hands over his ears. "Edward, I need you to strip. We're going to get into some very warm salt water. It will ruin your clothes. There are some trunks on the wall for you to wear."

He didn't move, just stood there shaking like a leaf. "Edward, can you hear me?" He gave a tiny nod. "I know you're still hearing the machines now but I need to get you undressed. I'm going to start untying the knots from your scrubs. If or when you feel ready to help, please do. If at any time you feel uncomfortable with me undressing you, just stop me. I can leave the room and wait for you. But I really want to get you into the tank as soon as possible. The silence will help."

I stepped behind him and placed my hands by the tie at his neck. I pitched my voice low and soft the way I would to soothe a bleeding sub after a lesson in withstanding pain. "Edward, I'm going to untie the knot at your neck. Just listen to my voice and focus on my hands." I pulled loose the cords and then moved to the one in the middle of his back. "There's one more on your shirt and then I'm going to slip it forward over your arms. You'll need to let go of your ears, just for a moment."

I quickly shoved the shirt down his arms and then led them back to his ears. I pulled down his surgical scrub bottoms, leaving him in a dress shirt and slacks. I moved back to his front and began to release the buttons on his shirt. "I'm taking off your shirt now. Are you doing okay, Edward?"

He again gave a small nod and this time let out a shaky breath. "I'm right here Edward, nothing is going to happen to you. Thank you for trusting me to do this." I clasped his hands softly and lowered them to his sides, pushing his shirt with them. "Do you still hear them?"

"Y... yes." Tears were now glistening at the corners of his still sealed eyes.

"Almost done and then I'll make it all go away. I'm going to undo your belt and pants. Kick off your shoes for me." I quickly slid his button through the button hole and lowered the zipper. This time it was my turn to bite my lip as I saw he'd gone commando beneath his black slacks.

His hair was trimmed but not bare, and I could see his cock laying softly against his upper thigh. I closed my eyes and pushed his pants down, careful until I was past his cock and balls. Reaching over, I grabbed a pair swim trunks and had him step out of his pants and into the shorts in the same fluid movement. I peeled off his socks and then began to work on getting myself naked. I quickly tossed off my clothes, just throwing them onto the bench and pulled on a pair of trunks.

I opened the plastic hatch and flipped on the orange light which would slowly fade to black after one minute in the water. I took a step up and over the threshold. Edward was still standing where I'd left him, his hands now at his sides, tensing and loosening with each breath.

"Come. It's safe in here. It's quiet. You'll want to open your eyes. Come take my hand."

Edward's eyes opened to the barest of slits and he shuffled forward to the step up to the tank. I held my hand out to him and he grasped it tightly, his breath coming short and fast. He was nearing hyperventilation. I helped him down the step into the tank, the water at his ankles.

"I'm going to pull the door shut. There is a pull cord by the door. It will turn on the light slowly, giving our eyes a chance to adjust. This orange glow will fade to complete black soon. Before that happens, I want you to finish going down the stairs or just sink down into the water. It's salinity will keep you afloat. I'm going to join you in the water but stay silent for a little while. You need to get your breathing under control and then we can start to talk through the day."

I slid down off the ledge into the water when I could still see his outline floating. I stretched out beside him, our hands only an inch or so apart. The water was warm, just above body temperature, like a nice bath minus the scented oils or bubbles.

Edward's breathing slowly came down over the next three or four minutes, our breathing the only sound in the tank. He was so tense that I could feel it where I was at. It was time to start bringing him down to a calm space where he could relax.

"Edward, do you still hear the sounds?"

I heard water swish and then a small laugh. "No. I tried shaking my head but all I did was get water in my ears."

"Is the darkness bothering you?"

"No, I like it. It's so different from the bright lights of the OR. Thank you for knowing exactly what I needed."

That's what a Dom does, Edward. I anticipate what you want through information I've gathered through careful study. Then I take care of you so that you can take care of me.

"I thought this would help. Are your eyes open?"

"It's pitch black, does it matter?"

I wanted to laugh at his rather annoyed tone, such a quick turn from his quiet grateful voice moments before. He was still in there, fighting this connection. Today was our turning point though. He needs me. I'm the one he called, not Bella.

"Would I have asked if it didn't? It matters because it proves that you aren't seeing illusionary blood where blood does not exist. Open your eyes Edward."

I was done playing games with him. It was time for us to get down to business. He was going to learn to do as I ask without talking back, without questioning my directives.

"Are they open now?"

"Yes but I don't see anything except blackness. There's nothing here."

"I'm here."

Edward went silent for a moment and then took a breath. It was let out shakily. "I know. I can feel you just beyond my reach. It's like I know where you are without seeing or touching you. Maybe it's just being in the tank making me open up all my senses. I don't know. It's nice knowing you're in here with me. You calm me down better than anyone I've met, even Bella."

"I'm glad that I help you Edward. It makes me feel useful. Is there anything you want to talk about today, what set off the panic attack?"

"No. We already covered that in the scrub room. It just hit me, it was too much."

"Do you want me to prescribe you a mild anti-anxiety medication? I would prefer to avoid it but if it would make you feel calmer when going into surgery, I would do so for you."

The water thrashed again. "No. I think it will be better next time. Knowing this is here will help too. I'll know that there is a place to get away from all the electronics. Hopefully you won't have to undress me again. Sorry about that."

"No worries. I'm going to be quiet for a while and just let you think. I want you to focus on absorbing the quiet into you so that you have a place of quiet to retreat to. If the world becomes too loud, you'll have a silent refuge you can sink down into until the world is more easily dealt with."

We floated in silence for a long time, my guess is that we were quiet for twenty minutes. My mind kept drifting to the sight of Edward's cock and the lovely pubic hair that was as bronze as the hair on his head. I'd overheard the nurses joking that they wanted a peek down his pants to see if he dyed his hair. I could vouch that it was all natural.

"Are you gay?"

I sputtered a bit of water that went into my mouth as I turned towards Edward's voice. Not only was his speaking sudden but that question of all things. I took a deep breath and considered how to answer without lying.

"You've seen Alice."

"Oh, yeah. Sorry."

"Edward, I don't want you to ever be sorry for asking me a question when you are free to do so. I want to know your mind and that is the only way for me to learn how your mind works. Thank you for finding the courage to ask a question which some could find offensive."

I thought back about the things I've heard about his brother. Emmett Cullen is notorious for not having a mental filter. "You are definitely Emmett's brother with that lack of finesse, Dr. Cullen."

Edward let out a small laugh. "I guess he's rubbed off on me a bit."

He continued to laugh for a few more seconds and then they quickly turned into sobs. I could feel his arms floundering in the water. I switched so that I was treading water, my toes just barely brushing the bottom.

"Edward, I'm here. Tell me what's going through your head."

He let out another loud sob, shaking. I could sense that he was now upright based on sound and the water's movement.

"I thought I was doing so well. You were making such a difference. And then today happened. I just don't think I'm ever going to get over this. I'm in a fucking sensory deprivation tank and I'm fucking bawling my eyes out in front of you. That's not how I do things."

I moved forward in the water until I ended up against his chest. I wrapped my arms around him and let him cry on my shoulder. His arms were on mine, not shoving me away, but not holding me either.

"Shh. Edward. It will be fine. You went through a major emotional trauma. It is going to have lasting effects."

I stroked his back gently and when water dripped down into my face I pushed my hair back and then gently pushed his bangs out of his eyes, off to the side. I continued to make soothing sounds as I rubbed circles on his back.

Edward's hands relaxed and he began to lean into me. I used my legs to propel us to the side where I sat on the lowest stair and had him resting in the water with his head on my shoulder.

"We can amp up the treatment and push you harder if you want. We'll get you to a point where you only see what is there. I will strip everything else away for you."

"Please, Jasper."

He shook in my arms as he let out a held breath. Oh Edward. I hate that you're so broken. I pressed a soft kiss into his hair. I instantly regretted it but could not take the action away. Hopefully he wouldn't notice.

"Shh. I can make it all go away, just let me in. Submit to me."

A/N: What did you think? Will Edward submit?