So I'm not sure if this will show up as an update, but if you're coming here like "chapter four wtf we're way past that" well I had do to a little revamping. I'll also probably be changing around a couple other chapters too thanks to something my beta over at twilighted pointed out to me. So feel free to re-read through this, there's only a small section towards the end that's been added in and changed.

Sorry, I've had plans to update sooner but work came a calling, plus my slight writers block didn't help. But all of you have encouraged me and never cease to amaze me.

Someone reviewed and told me that Chris really messed up Bella. Yes. Yes he did, but what you have seen and will see in this chapter is not even the half of it. And I'm sorry for that, but trust me it was hard for this Bella to come forward to want this written and it was even harder to write, and for me to have to see as she continues on with this story.

This chapter may be a little intense. Hold on to your seats kids, I promise the next couple chapters after this won't be so heavy.

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BPOV

RUN BELLA RUN!

No. Please. Please. PLEASE. NO, ANGELA!

I gripped my pillow tighter as I was thrust awake as vicious images played behind my eyelids. My heart stopped as my pillow gripped me back. I pushed myself backwards, effectively falling off the bed as I stared wide eyed at a confused and worried Edward.

It was just Edward. Fuck.

I cradled my face in my hands as sobs began to escape my throat. I gripped my hair tightly trying to fight back the sickness that for once was not caused by the little blessing growing inside of me. Scenes played through my mind and I tried to force them back into their locked box, but last nights visit had unlocked that box and now in the daylight I was forced to face all of my demons.

Edward was on the floor beside me trying to calm me, but I didn't even notice him. I was only vaguely aware of how loud my sobs were now. I should've been disturbed that I was in the fetal position, rocking like an insane person, but I was too far gone to notice now.

Chris…the bright room…yelling…panic…Phil…crying…Phil was protecting me…I was too afraid…she was protecting me too…I had to stop this…he wouldn't listen, didn't notice I was there…he was so mad….so mad…and than angela…ANGELA!

I felt strands of my hair ripping from my scalp and only realized than I had been screaming for some time as well as my voice grew hoarse from the strain. I didn't deserve to be here, it should've been me. It wasn't fair, it just wasn't fair.

"BELLA!" Edwards roar causing my mouth to snap shut and I stilled instantly, waiting for the blow I deserved for this crazy outbreak. "Bella," Edward cooed more softly now, as he tried to pry my hands from my hair. They stayed in position as his hands rubbed down my arms and to my shoulders. Oh, so he wasn't going to hit me he was going to punish me in another way. This was something I had earned, and I needed to accept it in order to keep Edward.

I lowered my hands, his own still on my shoulders. I kept my eyes to the floor and his thumb lightly traced across my jaw and I shuddered. At least with this punishment I could try to enjoy it and imagine Edwards hands were on me because he actually desired me and not because of my outburst. I waited for Edward to make his next move before realizing he probably wanted me to do something. My thumbs hooked under my shirt and Edward's hands pulled back instantly.

"What are you doing?" his voice sounded shaky, maybe he felt sorry he had to do this. I felt slight hope thinking my punishment might be easier because of this.

"It's okay, I know you have to punish me, I'll help you," I whispered and I felt him stand quickly.

"Jesus Christ, Bella. I am not going to punish you! I was just trying to…you did nothing….FUCK, I need to go for a walk," he stated quickly before exiting the room. I heard the front door slam and cringed almost feeling the vibrations of his anger as the walls shook.

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EPOV

She thought I was going to rape her. She thought because she had a nightmare, and a panic attack that I was going to punish her. I had stormed out on her, probably just confirming for her that I was angry with her and she deserved to be punished. But I wasn't mad at her, I was mad at Chris. Or Angela. Or all of them. Whoever fucked up her life that bad.

It had been a few minutes when the front door opened timidly, but I didn't turn to it. Instead I looked out at nothing, listening to the sound of Bella breathing behind me. Knowing she would just take this as a sign that I was still angry at her, I turned to her suddenly, taking a deep drag from my cigarette as I eyed her. Her eyes were puffy and swollen but the redness only seemed to make her eyes glitter like gold. Her hair was a wild mess that nearly competed with mine. Thankfully there were no bald spots. She had been pulling so hard on her hair I was sure she had ripped nearly all of it out.

I exhaled slowly as I nodded my head, signaling her to come to me. She shuffled slightly to me, head down, she stopped, standing next to me her back to the railing. I turned around than leaning on cool metal as I took another drag. I peered at her from the corner of my eye and she too had faced front leaning against the railing. She was staring at me. Any other time and I would've smiled at her, she looked so damn cute next to me.

"I didn't know you smoke," she finally said as I exhaled turning my head to face her now.

"I don't," I said quizzically, and her eyes narrowed as she tried to decipher what I was saying. "I quit three years ago," I admitted, and she turned from me than sighing audibly.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"I shouldn't have acted that way."

I scoffed staring at her than. "As if you could help it," she snorted at me but I placed my forefinger under her chin, urging her to look at me, "Bella, listen to me. You. Did. Nothing. Wrong." Her eyes gave her away that she doubted that but she smiled anyway.

"Okay."

We stood there in silence for a few more minutes. I argued with myself about touching her, and ended up wrapping my arm around her shoulders trying to prove to her that I was not mad at her. She seemed to relax at my touch, and we continued to stand there, neither one of us wanting to break the moment. I was the first to break the silence.

"Who's Angela," instantly her body tensed under my arm and I wondered what this girl could've done to upset Bella so much. This time the silence was awkward. I wished I hadn't brought up the subject, ruining such an imperfect perfect moment, so instead I didn't pursue my question, not wanting to pressure her.

"Lets go inside," I offered, ushering her back into my home.

Before long the smell of bacon and waffles wafted throughout the kitchen as Bella sat on a stool watching me cook. We still hadn't said a single word since the balcony.

Bella ate graciously and I was glad to get food in her stomach, knowing she was probably starving after this morning.

"My sister," Bella said suddenly, as I looked up at her from my own plate, "Angela, she was my sister."

My brow furrowed at this revelation, her sister had hurt her too? Man this was all so messed up, what did Bella do to deserve her family hurting her too?

"Renee is a drug addict, that's my mom, she met Chris when she was trying to score some ice. She fell for him instantly, and started bringing him around the house all the time. It was really fucked up. My step dad Phil traveled a lot for work to support us, and here she was using all of his hard earned money on drugs and to keep Chris. It was sick really. Angela and I would try to leave as often as we could, she always tried to take care of me. She's four years older than me."

Bella stopped than and I watched her push the remaining food around on her plate. I waited in silence hoping she would continue on and let me in just that much more.

"I was eleven. After school one day I came home and I ran in to tell my mom I'd gotten an A on my math test. I should've knocked first, I should've known, but my mom was always harping on me about my math grades so I figured she'd want to see…I was stupid."

Bella let out a large sigh before continuing on, "I was screaming 'MOMMY MOMMY' and threw the door open…they were having sex. I instantly shut up and back out of the room slamming the door and hid behind the couch. My mom was so furious, I could hear her screaming to him that she was going to kill me. I was so scared, I heard her rip the door open and stomp out trying to find me. Chris came out behind her and told her she better not touch me. I was so thankful than. But than he told her, 'find her, and bring her to me. Maybe she can join in the fun,' and I felt sick. I couldn't move. My mom was pissed when he said that, but not because I was her eleven year old daughter…"

Anger formed in her eyes as she pressed on, tears playing at her lashes, "but because I was her competition."

Her face was twisted in complete hatred than, and I was sure my eyes were alive with the horror unfolding in front of me.

"She argued she was the only one for him, I couldn't treat him the way she could. He slapped her. She lunged at him, but he shoved her against the wall and told her to, 'shut the fuck up'. So pathetic, she started sobbing and crying. Pleading that she could be good enough for him. He threw her down, and she hit the corner of the coffee table and was knocked out."

"I was panicked then. He was going to find me, to come after me. I kept my hand over my mouth the entire time, too scared to even think of a way out. I heard the front door open, it was Phil and Angela. I was so happy, but so scared. Chris must've heard him cause they didn't see him when they first walked in. Angela ran over to my mother, and my Phil was too busy looking for me. I heard a thud and the next thing I knew Phil was being dragged into the living room by Chris. He grabbed Angela, who had tried to run from him at that point. He tied the two together. Chris said he just wanted to know where I was. Of course he was too wasted to remember that they hadn't even been there when I hid, but he kept pressing them regardless."

"I realized I could see them through the crack in the couch, and Phil caught sight of me. His eyes widened, but he didn't say anything. Chris demanded again that Phil tell him where I was. Phil told him even if he knew he would never give me up. I heard a shot, and jumped realizing Chris had a gun. Phil was slumped forward, but I could tell he wasn't dead, and he kept staring at me. Almost as if he was trying to tell me something with his eyes, but I was too afraid to move, too afraid to understand."

Bella's eyes dark now and I could tell this story was getting increasingly hard to relive, and I wanted to tell her to stop. I needed her to stop this story, but I couldn't open my mouth. No I had to hear, because the story hadn't stopped for her, and it couldn't stop now just because I was uncomfortable.

"Angela was crying than, 'Daddy, daddy are you okay?' their backs were tied together so she couldn't see the gaping hole in his head. God I was glad she couldn't see that hole. I was surprised she called him daddy too, usually she just called him Phil. She only ever called Charlie daddy before, after he was killed on duty she refused to call Phil anything but his name. Daddy was a name to sacred for her to say to someone else."

"Anyway, she kept crying to Phil, asking if he was okay. Chris smacked her than, and it made me so mad. 'I just fucking killed him you bitch' he spat at her. I hated him, I wanted him dead, but my body refused to move. 'BELLA' Angela screamed at me, 'BELLA, PLEASE, IF YOU CAN HEAR ME RUN GET YOURSELF OUT. BELLA RUN!"

"Chris raised the gun to her too and I panicked, my body suddenly mobile as I jumped over the couch, 'Chris please don't,' I begged. Angela couldn't see me, but she must've heard my plea to Chris, 'RUN BELLA RUN,' she shouted to me. But I kept trying, kept begging. If Chris wanted me, he could have me. In anyway he liked, but he couldn't kill Angela…not Angela…, 'No, please don't hurt her. Please no,' I begged as he cocked the gun. I tried once more, 'No. Please no. Please. PLEASE.' My eyes closed as the shot rang out, 'NO, ANGELA' I screamed so loud I thought my vocal chords could rip from my throat if that was at all possible."

"Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion, but I realized all of this had happened within that hour of my A. That stupid fucking A. Why couldn't I just get a C like usual? Than I never would've barged in there. Everyone would be fine…My eyes finally opened, and now Angela and Phil were slumped over, but Angelas eyes were on me this time. She looked so scared. For me. She died for me. I should've saved her, should've been able to do more…"

Bella's voice trailed off as sobs overtook her now. I went to her, wrapping my arms around her while trying to wrap my mind around what she had just told me. Chris killed her family. Holy fuck, how old was this guy? Bella shoved away from me suddenly as she sprinted towards the bathroom. I heard her vomit, and knew it wasn't because of the baby but from the images that were no doubt ingrained in her thoughts.

At that moment I hated Chris. I wanted him dead. It didn't matter if he had ever completely 180 after that, he was a fucking monster. After a few minutes Bella re-emerged, her arms wrapped tightly around her body.

"He took me than, and we left. He wiped his prints from the gun, and stuck it in my moms. When the police were finally called she was found passed out with god knows how many drugs in her system, a gun in her hand, and her family dead on the floor. They assumed I had run away, but nobody cared enough to come after me. She was convicted and sent away, and I was forever stuck with Chris…"

Her voice was hoarse from crying.

"Until you got away," I added, and she looked at me with eyes that told me in her heart she still wasn't away from him.

"No, I think he was in my apartment last night. That's why I panicked and came here…" her eyes widened as she looked at me, "Oh my god, I never should've come here! He'll kill you now if he finds out you're involved with me in anyway. Oh fuck, I have to go," she said before nearly sprinting to the door, but I was closer and got there first as I blocked her only exit.

"You can't go," I demanded, "If he was in your apartment last night you can't just go back there. He could kill you and the baby. You're not leaving." Her face showed relief at my demand, but she seemed even more scared.

"I don't want you to get hurt Edward," she sobbed, her face in her hands again. I stepped forward embracing her fully, her tears staining my shirt.

"Well I won't let you go back there, not without me. And if you go back there, it's only to get some things. You're going to be staying with me," she nodded her head as her breath began to steady, her arms timidly wrapping around my waist.

We moved to the couch, both mindlessly watching tv although neither of us were paying any attention to the screen. Bella's head was in my lap, and I gently ran my fingers through her hair, trying to calm her. I was the first to break the silence.

"Is your mom still in jail?"

Bella sighed, "No. Chris paid her way out a few years after she was convicted. He's very powerful. Chris doesn't just run a drug operation, but he dabbles in a bunch of other illegal activity. Working for him I didn't just help have to help him deal, I helped him find his prostitutes. It's not something I'm proud of, but I was the one that convinced them to come with me. I promised them better lives," Her voice caught in her throat as she looked at me trying to gauge my reaction. "If a man paid enough he could even own one of us…" Bella grew silent as she stared down deep in though and I tried to grasp everything she was saying.

"Anyway, Chris had some dirt on certain people in the appeals office, and he threatened to blackmail them if they didn't let Renee go. After Renee was released she was just glad to be back with Chris. He made her job to look after me, and make sure I stayed in line. She hated me for it, hated every minute of it, but she did it because she loves Chris…"

"I tried to go to the police once, but just my luck he was one of the men Chris employed in the police station that made sure his drug deals never got busted. He pays off cops a lot, hell he even paid off a few federal agents once. His dad is a Congressman, and he even holds a lot of power after that. Their family is very…corrupt." her voice was sardonic as she laughed emptily. "I know he has more power then that, but I don't know all the details, he kept a lot of things from all of us."

We were silent again. How could her mom be so cruel? How could someone like Chris be out there doing this to people? I kept playing with Bella's hair as thoughts continued to race through my mind. I was trying to come up with a game plan to keep Bella safe forever, but I wasn't entirely certain how I could do that. But I would give everything I had to at least try. Before long Bella's breathing slowed. I didn't want to break the moment or the contact and waited until I was nearly falling asleep myself before I lifted her gently from the couch and laid her down in my bed.

Her shirt raised up slightly revealing the barely noticeable bump developing. My hand reached down as I leaned closer to her stomach, "Daddy will make you safe," I whispered before lightly placing a kiss on the bump.

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BPOV

My dreams were all jumbled that night, first they started out much like last nights. Chris was there. I could see Phil, and hear his and my sisters brave attempts to keep me safe, even though they didn't even know if I was in the house. I dreamt of the look of possession in his eyes as he stared at me realizing he could have me, and only me all to myself. I was crying, praying my mom would wake up and come to her senses. Praying she would use the gun Chris had placed in her hands to save me from his.

Midway through my dream Edward was there, holding a child. He was laughing and smiling, and wanting me to come join them. I felt so afraid, afraid that if I fell for this fantasy that eventually I would awake in my hovel once again under Chris's thumb. They kept beckoning to me, but I couldn't go to them. I couldn't get my own hopes up and I couldn't put them in the danger I knew tended to follow me. The more I worried and refused to go with them the further away I seemed to get.

Finally they were completely gone, and it was complete darkness. Chris was nearby, I could tell because the hair on the back of my neck was standing up. I wanted to get away from him, but wasn't sure where he was in the first place and was afraid I would end up running straight into him. I could hear a baby crying, and I felt the pull to go to it, but my fear kept me in place. I heard a strange noise and the child was silenced instantly as I heard Chris's distinct low chuckle.

My eyes flew open, but I didn't move, and I looked down to see Edward's hand on my exposed stomach. He was talking softly to the baby, he thought I was still sleeping. I closed my eyes, and listened as he told our child stories. Every few sentences he would pause before saying, "Don't worry, it'll be okay, I'm going to keep you and mommy safe," and I wondered if he was saying that because he believed it or because he was trying to convince himself that he somehow could. I tried not to think to much about it, and drifted back to sleep hearing childhood stories of Edward.

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Sorry it took so long guys.

A) Had a slight bought of writers block until last night

B) this chapter was extremely hard to write so please go easy on me

C) I am not making you guys wait for this to be beta'd because well….I'm pretty upset myself from this revelation {remember I didn't realize I would be writing THIS until last night} and I just wanna get it out there and move on. I'm still gonna have it beta'd and just stick up the revised version at a later date….maybe….

Remember reviews encourage Bella and Edward to continue this story, as it is a rather tough one.