Equally Cursed and Blessed

by Caer

As long as Kyou can remember, he and Yuki have been enemies, but there's more to it than that. Dark secrets lurk in the past of every Sohma and one horrible act by the accursed head of the clan will set off the beginning of finding all the answers

14. EQAB13

As long as Kyou can remember, he and Yuki have been enemies, but there's more to it than that. Dark secrets lurk in the past of every Sohma and one horrible act by the accursed head of the clan will set off the beginning of finding all the answers

Title: Equally Cursed and Blessed

Authors: Caer

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Yaoi, violence, angst

Pairings: Eventual YukixKyou, ShigurexHatori, HaruxMomiji

Status: Work in progress (part 13)

Disclaimer:   Yeah whatever…

Hokay.  Now we're getting somewhere.  I'm actually getting this baby done.  Well okay, it's only half way, but we're to the climax of the first half anyway.

Thank you all, you wonderful wonderful people for reviewing and making me so happy.

I have some general commenty things at the end, for various reviewers.

EQAB 14

"Akito!  Is anybody in there?"

Akito lay in the cool silk of his bed sheets.  He had sent Kureno away, but he was too tired to even visit his garden.  He had been in a dark mood all day thanks to that ungrateful rat.  Stupid, unappreciative…   Yuki would need another lesson.  He had dared to refuse his god, again.  Was there no end to his disobedience?

Akito was about to dismiss whoever was yelling for him.  He had a horrible headache, but when the door opened, he could make out a familiar figure.

"Shigure?" he rasped, sounding more pathetic than he really was, but Shigure was always good for sympathy and he needed it.  "Is that you?"

Shigure shut the door behind him and came to sit on the bed. 

"My good dog… where have you been?  I have a terrible headache."

Strong, rough hands brushed his hair back from his face and Shigure's voice was gentle.

"Would you like me to rub your feet?"

Akito whimpered a little as he nodded.  His dog was so good to him.  He was always loyal.  Akito allowed his slender feet to be pulled from under the covers and he could feel the tension in his neck and shoulders relax ever so slightly as strong fingers pressed the appropriate pressure points in his feet.  Gradually, his headache lessened and he obeyed Shigure's soft command to breathe deeply.  Once Shigure was done with his feet, he moved to work on his hands, threading his own large fingers into Akito's slender ones, pressing his hands back to stretch them before kneading his palms, and then the muscles of each digit.  When he was done, Akito 'hmed' and opened his eyes, smiling up at his faithful dog.

Sitting up, he crawled into Shigure's lap, eyeing the dog's unkempt hair distastefully but playing with it anyway.

"You always make me feel better, my Shigure."

Shigure simply smiled, and sliding his larger arms around the slim waist of his god, let Akito nestle into him.

"You never come to visit me anymore," Akito pouted.

Shigure sighed dramatically.  "Well, I have had a sick child to deal with.  My writing suffers terribly.  Mit-chan is terribly overwrought."  Shigure said happily.

"Sick child?"  Akito feigned, cocking his head.  "Ah, you mean that creature…" Akito smiled evilly.  "You had me confused for a moment.  I thought you meant a real child."

Shigure dropped his cheerful façade.

"As you say," he said, "But he came very close to dying, Akito."

"What do I care?  Send him to that other man.  He's the one who adopted the vile thing.  Why doesn't he deal with it?  Why do you need to waste your time on that thing?"

"Because I care about Kyou, even if you disapprove.  He's my family.  He's your family too."

"I didn't hurt him!"  Akito snarled.  "I love my family, even him.  It's not my fault."

"You didn't push him off that ledge, Kyou told me as much."

"It serves him right!  He attacked me, his god!"

"You took his bracelet away."

Akito flung himself from Shigure's arms.  "He has forgotten his place!  Such a creature."  Akito turned to his dresser, opening the middle drawer and pulling out a warmer robe to fight the chills he was having.  "That bitch has been putting ideas into his head.  He's been putting on airs, pretending to be human."  Akito turned.  "I had to stop it."

Shigure stood, walking to Akito and straightening the collar of his robe.  "Well, be that as it may, it's time consuming for all involved.  Kyou is missing school, so he's home with me.  Kazuma has a business to run.  Besides, it couldn't be risked, the evil cat being revealed to anyone outside the family."

Akito sighed.

"Well, I'll soon have an end put to that."

"I don't doubt it, Akito-san."

"I am your god, after all."

"Yes.  Yes you are.  You're also chilled.  Don't you think some tea would be good right now?"

"I don't know," Akito leaned up against Shigure, absorbing the taller man's heat.  "I'm so tired."

"Awww, but that's why I came.  Besides, I have a new story I wanted to tell you about."

"I do like your stories," the smaller man admitted grudgingly.

"Well then?"

"I'm too tired to walk."  Akito said crossly.  He was not disappointed as Shigure easily lifted him, carrying him out to the tea-room.  He didn't notice Kureno watching from down the hall as they passed, nor did he see the look of understanding that passed between the Dog and the Rooster of his Jyuunishi.

Kureno tamped down the familiar wave of jealousy that he felt whenever Shigure came to spend time with his Akito.  The truth was, Shigure would most likely be in Akito's bad graces for a while after this.  If Yuki could do it … they would be helping Kyou.  With Akito furious at Yuki and Shigure, his only way to turn would be into Kureno's arms.  The quiet Rooster of the Jyuunishi let his daydreams wander as he quietly stole into Akito's room, making the bed and turning on the bedside lamp in preparation for Akito's sleep.

He hoped Akito would ask him to bed tonight.  It was one of the only true pleasures Kureno got out of his quiet life.  Of course what he dreamed about was far more illicit than anything that ever happened.  Akito's lust always seemed to be centered around Yuki.  He only used Kureno for comfort, and the Rooster was happy with that.  However it didn't stop him from imagining Akito's thin body looming over his.  Akito would run those cold, slender fingers over his chest, rubbing him … touching him.

Far be it from Kureno, to count his chickens – no pun intended- before they were hatched, but if someday, Akito knew his worship, and his alone, he would not be unhappy.

With this in mind, Kureno walked over to the dresser, easing the top drawer open a tad.  In case Akito came back, it wouldn't seem too suspicious.  The various medications Akito took, left his mind rather cluttered.  This made things a bit easier sometimes.   It would not be difficult to convince him that he had left his own drawer ajar.  

Now it was up to Yuki to finish this.  Kureno felt nervous already.  He had interfered far too much already.  Everyone knew it was bad fortune to meddle negatively in their God's business.  It could only bring bad luck.  To go against him, as Yuki was about to do, would surely bring a great downfall.   Yuki would have to face Akito's wrath when all of this was done.  Better to take his God's punishment with honor than to bring misfortune to himself or the ones he loved.  They had all heard the stories as children.  Sickness, loss of fortune, even death could befall a Sohma that went against the head.  Whether the Jyuunishi were immune to this or not, it was unknown. 

They just might find out.

Taking one last look to make sure the room was clean, Kureno took his leave.

Outside, the rain continued to pour on two quiet figures standing in the trees next to the compound wall.    They hunched silently in the bushes, vigilantly watching the main house, waiting.  When the light went out in the back window, they began to move.

Yuki stared down at Tohru sadly.  Even with layers of clothing, and a rain jacket, the little thing was shivering like a leaf. 

"Miss Honda, I'm sorry that we've had to drag you into this.   It isn't fair to put you through so much."

Of course, Tohru shook her head, vigorously, causing a small rainfall around her as her rain-hat released its built-up water.

"Sohma-kun, please don't."  She smiled, her little teeth chattering.  "I'm so very happy to be helping you.  It's such a wonderful adventure!  I feel like one of those spies in the movie!  Except I don't have all the special listening equipment and weapons and ropes to climb buildings with and stuff!  But it's really exciting!  I only wish I could do more."

Yuki smiled, knowing that she had done more for them than could ever be explained or properly repaid.  He took off his jacket and shivered as the cool air hit his naked skin.  The water began to quickly drench his hair and t-shirt.  He had worn little, leaving his warm clothes in Tohru's bag for later.  He began to shiver as badly as Tohru, but he relaxed his muscles, doing his best not to worry the loving girl.  He only wished they could have accomplished this without dragging her out into the freezing night.  If she got sick tonight, he would never forgive himself.  And he'd kick that damn cat's ass for being so … the cause of everything.

The final signal came into play, as a squeak sounded from the other side of the wall.  The two looked down as a bedraggled, wet rat appeared.  Yuki knelt and allowed the creature to crawl into his hand, bringing it close to his ear. 

Tohru watched with mix of horror and a little fascination.  She had always been afraid of rats as a child, though she was never afraid of Yuki when he changed.  To see one of the little creatures, so close to Yuki's tender ear, brought her an irrational sense of dread that she fought valiantly while she watched it speak to him.  He set it down, and as it did something that she construed as bowing to her before scampering off, she once again felt that she must be going crazy.  This was of course, a common occurrence in the menagerie that was her life and it was easily shrugged away.  She was confident that if she really was crazy, society had done the responsible thing and locked her in a padded room, and she was therefore inside her own mind and no harm to society.  Who could say?

Yuki rose and turned to her, violet eyes serious.

"That's it then.  They found a way in.  It's going to be a bit difficult, but I'm sure I can handle it."

"If anyone can do it, I'm sure you can, Sohma-kun!"

Yuki was silent, grateful that his blush couldn't be seen in the dark night.  He reached out, taking her small hand in his.  He couldn't really feel how cold she was, as his fingers were numb with the cold as it was.  She stared up at him, and even in the dim light cast buy the nearby houses, this close, he could see the adoration in her eyes and only wished he could be half as worthy of it.  Staring into her eyes, he felt as if he was staring over a cliff … a deep precipice that had no bottom.  He was leaving the familiar … taking action and entering the unknown.  What he did tonight would change things … possibly forever.  He felt full of chaos, full of doubt and yet he had never felt more in control.  Akito had meddled with his family; not the Jyuunishi family, but his, Yuki's family, and he was going to fix that.  He was going to get his family back.

He was also not going to waste this opportunity with Tohru.   With a sinful smirk, he leaned forward, capturing her lips with his, reveling in the soft small mouth against his, before she clutched to him and he to her and with a loud POOF, he was suddenly staring at her galoshes, as he tried to untangle himself from his sopping t-shirt.  Little as he was, he felt no small amount of triumph and power when he looked up to see the look of surprise and loss on her face.  There was no time to waste though and he crawled onto her toe.

"Honda-san, I need the bag!"

"Oh!"  Shaking her head, she knelt down, reaching into her pocket and pulling out a small object.  Yuki sighed in humiliation.  If Kyou ever found out, he would never hear the end of this.

"I hear you.  I do … but I don't understand."  Momiji waited for a response, but got nothing but unintelligible whispering as usual.    He wondered idly if he was going crazy, however, as a hopeless romantic, he rather preferred something magical and special happening.   He didn't feel crazy.  He still had control, unlike some of the other members of the 12shi, who would not be named at this moment.  At least he didn't freak out and break things when he couldn't handle life.  At least he didn't just chase after impossible dreams, and flirt with people with absolutely no interest in him.  No, if the answer was "no" he wasn't going to dwell on it.  He would just move on.  No problem.

Just because someone was a jerk and didn't know a good thing when he saw it, Momiji wasn't going to carry some sort of torch.

Just a kid.  Okay, so he was a little bit childish sometimes.  But he lived in fantasy.  That was how he dealt.  He didn't want to wallow in self-pity like Kyou or put up a wall of ice like Yuki or Hari … or say, go crazy, like some unnamed cousins.  He just wanted to believe in the shiny, more beautiful side of life.  It was there.  It was.  Someday it would come.  He wasn't going to give up.

He also kind of wanted to keep his virginity, so maybe, if there were unicorns, he might be able to hold one in his lap too, but that wasn't childish was it?  Though, if Haru would just give him a chance, he would gladly give that little dream up.

But Haru was so dumb sometimes.  He probably didn't even realize what Momiji meant when he said he liked him.

Then again, Haru hadn't said a word to him since yesterday.  Right now he was sitting downstairs "babysitting."  Hari had asked him over as usual, since he was expecting to be away.  For the first time, Momiji had been sensitive to that.  But when he tried to tell Hatori that he wasn't a baby, and that he could take care of myself, Hari had just looked at him with that flat expression and said that he was really more worried about Haru than Momiji, and just like a whoopee cushion, all of Momiji's indignation had deflated … he could have sworn he heard the tooting sound it made as it did.

But the boy hadn't come up to invite Momiji down for a movie.  He hadn't tried to talk to him.  Damnit, it's like he didn't even care. 

For the tenth time tonight, Momiji thought about storming down and yelling at him.  He had thought about different ways of approaching it.

'Haru you clod!' he could say.  Or perhaps, 'you really are a dumb ox, and your head's just as thick too!'

If it wasn't for this insane whispering.  He couldn't concentrate sometimes, with it going through his head … and yet as loud as it seemed, he could never really make out what it was saying.  It wasn't urgent … yet, it was beckoning.  It always seemed to get louder when he was outside.  In fact, the closer he got to the woods outside the compound, the louder it was.  If it wasn't raining cats and dogs outside, he might take a walk and see what it might be.

He shivered a little at that.  Not that he was a baby, but going into those woods alone was a little intimidating.  He had hoped that he could maybe ask Haru to go.  Momiji bit down hard on his lip.  No.  He would just do it himself.  He would prove to Haru that he wasn't just a kid.  Then he would go and get his own boyfriend, and then Haru would be alone, because there wasn't a snowball's chance in hell that Yuki would ever warm to his advances.

Yeah.  As soon as the rain stopped.

Momiji sighed.  He hoped that Kyou would be all right. 

Yuki blanched internally as he pushed his way through the muddy night.   Being a rat sucked the big one right about now.   Admittedly, he embraced his animal form far less than some of his cousins did.  Shigure and Momiji especially, seemed to be quite comfortable in their alternate forms, spending quite a bit of time in them.   Momiji was simply a lecherous little boy who wanted to hug Tohru all the time.  Shigure, however, spent quite a bit of time as a dog, sniffing around and doing dog-type things.  Yuki sniffed.  He would much prefer to be the dog right now.  At least he wouldn't be belly-deep in mud, scrambling his little legs toward the back of the Honke, underneath the near ancient raised wooden building.  He tried very hard to ignore the fact that there were probably spiders as big as his head in this tiny crawlspace.  He tried to ignore the fact that it was dark and pressing. 

The other rats running around him gave him some amount of comfort.  At least he wasn't alone.  The other thing that kept his mind occupied was how ridiculous he felt, among his fellow rats.  He doubted highly that any of his ratty accomplices had ever seen a rat with a backpack on before.  The fact was, Yuki couldn't possibly carry the bracelet in this form.  It would be difficult enough getting inside, barring the fact that he would have to climb the furniture, get onto the dresser, and somehow manage to get into Akito's dresser drawer.  So Kagura had suggested a pack … a backpack to carry the bracelet when he got it. 

The idea was sound … just bloody embarrassing.  It didn't help that she had made a backpack with a small kitty head sewed onto it, with a tail and paws as the straps.  She had put quite a bit of effort into it.  Yuki wished she hadn't.  He felt a fool, both as a rat and as a human being.  Had he sunk so low?  He only prayed that no one would ever know.  Unfortunately that wasn't likely to happen since Shigure had seen the invention, he hadn't been able to stand he was laughing so hard.  If Hatori hadn't been there to shut him up, they never would have gotten back to the main house.

Gathering around a particular part of the house above them, the rats chattered at Yuki, showing him the rather large hole in the wood above.   With their help, he could hoist himself into the hole and find Akito's room from there.  He felt like he was in a dam Disney movie, as the rats climbed on top of one another to allow him to reach his destination.  He could see it now, he thought dryly, as he climbed onto their backs and stood on his hind legs like some sort of trained pet.  Disparate from his human form, his front legs weren't strong enough to hoist his entire rat body into the small space.  He was forced to take a flying leap and scrabble against the wood in order to climb inside.  Shigure would be in fits of merriment by now. 

The hole had ended up leading him to the inside of an oshiire, a closet where one keeps their futon when they aren't using it.  To whom it belonged, Yuki knew not.  All of the rooms had been furnished with western-style beds at Akito's order several years ago.  This left the small closet quite musty smelling.  It might have been stifling to the claustrophobic boy, if in his current size, the small space didn't feel like a warehouse.

Still, there was yet a spider to be encountered.  Yuki carefully kept his ratty gaze away from dark corners and headed for the light leaking under the door.  He valiantly fought back the sneezing fits caused by the vast amounts of dust in this small space.  He only hoped that someone didn't hear.  Squeezing under the door, he was somewhat pleased to discover that this room was abandoned.  Giving in, he sneezed himself silly, wiping his nose with his small paws. 

Looking around, he sighed in relief.  This appeared to be the room Momiji usually stayed in, meaning he couldn't be far from Akito's room and he wasn't likely to run into any of the staff, since these rooms were empty.

Adjusting his mockery of a backpack, he scurried to the door.  It slid open easily and he pushed his way out into the hall.  There wasn't a sound along the dark corridor.  Probably Akito and Kureno were the only people who regularly slept in this wing, so it was no surprise.  Even though the rat in him was inherently nervous at being in such a wide open place, the Yuki in him was relieved.  It was clean and spacious.  Still, he hugged close to the wall in true rat form, heading for Akito's room.  It certainly took a long time in this body.   At each corner, Yuki sniffed for anything close or threatening.  It was probably a good thing at this moment that Akito despised cats … or he might be in trouble.

Finally, he reached the door to Akito's bedroom.  It reeked of him.  Yuki knew that smell more than he liked to think about.  That he knew the stench of Akito in human form was bad enough.  As a rat, it permeated his nose and mind like an acrid fog.  Yuki shivered involuntarily.  Even Kyou in his alternate form could not bring terror like the stifling smell that accompanied Akito.

Still, Yuki pushed on, making his way into the dark room that smelled of medicine and menthol and death.  He scrambled up onto the bed to get a better view of the room.  The dresser was large and ornate, but entirely too slippery to just climb on top of.  Yuki backed up and took a flying leap from the bed, just barely catching the lip of the drawer before scrambling in.

Inside the drawer, the smell of Akito was entirely overpowering and Yuki had to resist the animal urge to flee.  Taking a few deep breaths, he steeled himself and looked around.  It was awkward walking on the clothes but he carefully picked his way to a small velvet box.  Of course, it was only small from a human perspective.  It was still about twice Yuki's size in his current form. 

Unhinging the simple clasp, Yuki lifted up the lid, revealing a velvet black lined inside… and nestled among old jewelry and various Sohma heirlooms, sat a very plain looking black and white bracelet.  To Yuki's eyes, it was the most dazzling piece in the box.

Tohru wasn't worried.  She was merely peering over the wall because Yuki might need some assistance.  Just because he had told her to wait in the car, didn't mean she shouldn't come out and wait to make sure he didn't need some help right?  After all, it was terribly wet and cold out here, and in such a small body.  Plus, he would have to carry the bracelet on his way back.  He might be fairly tired, and she was perfectly fit and able to help him the rest of the way to the car.  It wasn't because she was worried.  Just because she hadn't been able to sit in the car for more than ten minutes at a time, it didn't mean she was worried.

So intent on being unworried as she was, she didn't notice the tiny "Honda-san" that barely succeeded piercing the dark rainy night.  It wasn't until she felt a slight pressure on her foot, screamed, jumped and suddenly felt the pressure not there anymore, that she realized that Yuki was back.  Except now he wasn't quite back.  He was stuck by his little backpack on one of the bushes, about three feet away.

"Honda-san!" he squeaked …  "It's only me."

"Auuuuuuggggggghhhhhhh!" Tohru whispered out her dismay.  "I'm sorry!  I'm so sorry!  I didn't even see you!  You scared … and I'm so stupid!  Please forgive me."

"Please don't worry yourself … but … if you don't mind, I could use some help?" he waved his tiny mouse arms in the air, as he was quite thoroughly suspended by his stupid backpack.

Tohru immediately rushed over, picking up her tiny prince and checking him for any damage.  He seemed to be relatively intact, and as her hands brushed over the tiny kitty backpack, they paused.  She gasped, and felt for it again, her cold little fingers pressing into Yuki's back.

"You… you found it!  Oh!"

Suddenly, Yuki was being squeezed rather unceremoniously between Tohru's welcoming breasts.  If rats could blush, Yuki was sure he would be pink all over.  He was mortified… and if he said anything about it, she would realize, and apologize more.  However, he did allow a small smirk, knowing how jealous Shigure would be if he knew.  Pervert. He waited patiently as she bubbled over how happy she was and how brave Yuki was. 

Yes, definitely pink all over.

I thank everyone, but I have a couple of little comments… let's see.

Demeter1-  I like Akito… as a villain, he's wonderful… but I agree.  I hate it when people merely use a character as some unexplained evil.  Akito, of any of the characters, is multifaceted.  There's more to his cruelty than just cruelty.

BlackMirror-  I know, I'm a predictable sot.  (insert smiley face)

Ryuuza-  You have made me a very happy happy authoress.  That review kicked butt and made me just high as a kite.  I promise… within the next two chapters, they will actually be touching each other.  No worries.

Yamatoforever… Yes it is about time.  And thank you for staying with me.

Rubylove- I have a hard time seeing Tohru with anyone either to be honest… but we must be realistic.  She's too cute not to molest.  Besides it's Hana… they won't be having sex for years.  Also… pantysmelling is a classic anime lechery technique.  Watch Great Teacher Onizuka and you'll see.  .

TBC

I was going to cover more, but I think I need to cut it off here.  I kind of know what I want to write, but I think I need to put it in the next chapter instead.