This chapter will be in BPOV only, the next in Edward's. We'll progress from there as I'm being told this story. I'm sure by the last chapter you are all frantic and possibly angry with me, which is why I am writing this before my previous chapter is even been beta'd so hopefully I can get it out quickly and nobody has heart failure. SM owns all except for my twisted little plot lines here.

To Shanda, I couldn't respond to your review so I'm going to thank you here. Your words made me tear up. Thank you so much.

Oh and I'm sure there will be concern. Yes Bella will be stressed, yes it is bad for the baby, but no, nothing will ever happen to that child. It's a Cullen/Swan and it's a damn survivor despite the stress.

And sorry, this chapter has been done since sunday, and i've been waiting for my beta, but i decided to just be impatient and post this since i don't know when she'll be able to send it back to me. And chapter 11 is already in progress :)

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BPOV

I could hear the soft murmur of my heart in my ears, and the sound of my breathing. It was calming, no other sounds around me were registering and so I slipped deeper into myself. My heart fluttered as I felt a hand run on my stomach.

My eyes fluttered open and my smile hurt my face as I stared up into Edward's gorgeous green eyes. He was smiling back and talking to me, but I couldn't understand what he was saying. It didn't matter though, because he was here with me. Touching me.

I felt his fingers lace in my hair and my eyes shut as I sighed in content. Everything about Edward was calming. I loved this.

He was laughing now as he pulled me with him. We were at the park, when had we gotten here? I couldn't remember, but I didn't mind. I watched as Edward played with a little boy, they were both laughing and looking over at me.

"Mommy watch!" the boy yelled, as I smiled at them like they were my entire world. They were my entire world. I could sit here and watch them all day, everyday. They looked so happy and content together, knowing that I was waiting on the sidelines for them.

The little boy ran over to me then, and I recognized him as my own immediately. He had Edwards piercing green eyes, and his hair was the same brown as mine. He had that single adorable dimple like Edward, but his lips and nose were much like mine. He was the closest thing I had ever witnessed to perfection.

I wrapped my arms around him as he stared up at me smiling widely. Edward came over to me then, and wrapped us both in his arms, and I felt safe. I felt at home. He kissed my forehead as the little boy ran off to play.

The sky grew darker, until it was black, and my little boy disappeared into the darkness. I panicked, I tried to go after him but I was immobile. Edward promised he would save him as he dashed off behind him, the darkness swallowing him whole as well. A sudden sense of loss overwhelmed me as I struggled to go to them. My legs felt like lead as I slowly moved forwards, but instead of getting closer to the void I was moving further away from it. I could hear both of their voices calling to me, needing me, and I urged my body to move towards them…

I could hear noise around me as I struggled to open my eyes. My breathing was labored now as the images of my dream continued to play behind my eyelids. I waited for Edward to comfort me like he usually did after my nightmares, but was only greeted by the cold of the room slapping me in the face.

My eyes were finally opened, and I immediately closed them again. The pain that shot through my head was excruciating, and my hands immediately went to my stomach in fear. I hoped that he was okay as I continued to caress the child inside.

"You act like you love the little shit that's inside of you," Chris observed as he leaned against the counter watching me.

"How could I not?" I murmured, and immediately hoped he hadn't heard.

"That's it," he growled as he advanced towards me, "we're getting rid of that thing TODAY!" I turned my back towards him wrapping my arms around my stomach. It couldn't end like this, I couldn't lose another child to him.

"Stop it," I heard a voice say, and I turned in shock to see Chris staring at this woman with the same confused expression.

"Christopher, this child will be carried to full term," I sighed as she continued to speak, and was actually thankful she had walked in, "we'll make a fortune for it on the black market."

My eyes widened in fear, was there really a black market? My inner self scolded me for being surprised, I had long ago realized that nothing was impossible in this world: Chris' world. For now, I told myself to be thankful, but I would try to think of a way to keep him from being…sold. I nearly sobbed at the thought, and quickly turned my head towards the wall.

"Leave us," the voice commanded as tears silently streamed down my face.

"Well Bella, aren't you even going to say hello to your mother?" Renee asked with a sly smile.

"Hello mother," I echoed obediently.

"Now Bella," she chided, "that's no way to thank your mother after saving your bastard child."

"Thank you," I said, trying to make my voice sound more believable.

"You're probably wondering why I had you brought back," she asked, and I felt confusion cloud my thoughts. Why she brought me back? Chris was in charge, Chris had always been in charge.

"Chris had me brought back, not you," I answered, wondering if this was some sort of test.

"Stupid girl. Yes, Chris wanted you back, but I'm the one that let him," she grabbed my hair, yanking my face close to hers and I could smell the garlic and onion on her breath, "I'm in charge now."

With that she released me, shoving me into the hard floor.

"Bella, Bella, you really have made things difficult for yourself," she clucked as her eyes roamed over my features. "Of course you're going to carry this child to term. It'll be worth more then some dead smelly fetus. In the meantime you will earn your keep like before."

"I'll have to drum up new clients for you, although I know some of them won't mind having you back, even if you are pregnant. Don't worry Bells," she said, trying to sound caring like she used to, "the hormones will make the sex easier. Promise."

My heart plummeted at the thought of my body being violated by others, especially while my child was there. He would witness it all. I had to get away, had to find someway out of here. But how could I possibly do that without getting myself killed?

"I have some business to take care of," Renee said as she turned to walk out the door, "don't try anything funny. You are under strict watch."

I felt the tears form in my eyes as I listened to the door slam, but I tried to fight them off as I took in my surroundings. I was in a dark, shabby looking room, which I assumed was some trashy hotel. I had lived in places like these for the majority of my life. The carpet was a dark green color, and as I pushed into it to stand I could feel the years of grime rub up against my skin.

The walls were a pea green, and the comforter matched. It smelled of stale smoke, and I felt bile threatening to rise, but swallowed it down. I had to be strong now, had to think smart.

After walking a few steps I immediately felt wobbly, and sat quickly on the bed. The feeling continued to grow stronger, as my mind seemed to drift into a haze. I felt as if I were in a dream, and I thought I faintly heard the sound of a door.

"This shit really creeps, doesn't it Bells," I heard Chris say, as I turned to see him standing in the corner of my room.

"What," I asked dumbfounded.

"This meth," he said, head lolling to the side, "it doesn't hit right away. It creeps up on you. I take if you've started feeling it."

Shit. Chris had injected me with drugs, of course he had injected me with drugs. My eyes were wide with panic as I tried to grasp at any rational thought to try to help myself.

"Don't find it, just enjoy it," Chris countered, as he begin meticulously picking at his face. "Damnit, I wish I could find that damn bug that keeps crawling on me."

I felt my pulse being to quicken, and I knew that I was just pushing the effects of the drug onto my body further.

"You…bastard!" I screamed, staring wildly at him, as I grabbed to handfuls of my hair.

"Whoa, whoa. Calm down, your baby will live if that's what you're worried about," he said nonchalantly, his fingers still working diligently at what he thought was his "bug".

"How do you know?" I spat at him, angry seeping from every pore.

"Come on. Think logically. Crack babies are born everyday. That little fucks more likely to die from, oh I dunno, you falling down the stairs then anything else."

He smirked at me, I fought the urge to lunge at him and rip out his throat. I wanted to tear him limb from limb, and I would've gladly done it if I had thought I wouldn't get my own ass killed in the process.

I watched as Chris moved closer to me, as tracers fell from his body. What the fuck? Why was I seeing tracers?

Reaching my hand up to brush the stray hair in my face, I instantly felt something sticky. Pulling my hand away I saw the faint traces of blood. I was bleeding too? I returned my fingers to the spot to find it was mostly dry as I turned to glare at Chris.

"I'm bleeding." I stated.

"I know, baby, that's why I gave you the drugs."

"Wait, drugs. As in plural? What exactly did you give me?"

"Well I figured you must miss them, so I didn't know which one to give you…I gave you a little of everything."

"Oh my god, Chris…" was all I could say. I wanted my voice to sound angrier, but the drugs wouldn't allow it as I began to see bright colors and odd shapes all around. The smile on my face seemed to be stuck there as I tried to regain control of my body.

"It's okay baby, I'm just trying to make it better." he said as he pulled me on the bed with him, holding me close to his body. I wanted my body to push away from his, but the sensations of his touch on my skin was amazing. I knew it was the drugs, but I didn't want it to end. I felt the haze begin as I slowly drifted off, vaguely aware that this could be the last time I would ever be conscious. This could be the end for me. Yet still I couldn't find it in me to be upset or angry.

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"Belly, come on," Angela giggled as she ran across our back yard that had become our makeshift meadow.

"Gelly," I cried after her, "Don't leave me!" She was so far ahead of me I was afraid I would lose her.

"Belly," she sighed in her adult tone, "I would never leave you, we're just in the back yard! Now chase the utterflies with me!"

I ran excitedly with her now as we captured the invisible butterflies in our tiny fingers, squealing with each catch. I described mine as I caught a blue and purple gorgeous butterfly in my hands.

"Yours are always prettier," she pouted, crossing her arms in front of her.

"Gelly, but I catch them for you! See, pretty," I exclaimed, placing my butterfly in her hands. I watched as my sisters face lit up in delight at my gift.

"Oh Belly, you're the best little sister ever!"

Her words resounded in my ears as I saw flashes of her death before my eyes. I wanted to erase those memories from my mind. I wanted to only remember the good times with Angela. I wanted to make new memories with her.

"No," I sobbed into my hands, "I'm the worst sister ever. I'm sorry Gelly, I'm sorry."

I pulled my hands from my face in an attempt to dry my eyes, but stopped when I saw Edward standing in front of me with a child. I reached out to them, wanting the perfect being in my arms, but Edward snatched her back from my reach.

"No Bella, you can't have us. It's your fault. We're dead, and it's all because of you."

With every word he said I watched the two of them melt away. I tried to grab them, but my fingers went through them as if they were only wisps of fog.

"No, NO!" I screamed, my hand flailing wildly in front of my face, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," I kept repeating as the tears streamed down my face.

"This is all your fault," Angela and Edwards voice chorused in unison, "we'd still be alive if you weren't so horrible. So stupid."

"I could have had a life. Maybe I would be married, maybe I would have kids. I could have been anything!" Angela's voice seethed with anger.

"I could have found someone to love. Someone who could be everything I deserve. You stole that opportunity from me," Edward's voice condemned me.

They were true. Everything they said was true. This whole thing was my fault. I wish I had never been born.

"Mommy," a tiny unfamiliar voice said, as I felt my heart clench in anguish, "I could've had a real mommy, a good mommy…I hate you for taking my life from me."

That last admission made me want to rip my heart out with my own hands. To try to fix the lives I'd broken apart with shreds of my own life.

"Bella," Edward was coming towards me now. I stared at the god in front of me, his hair was askew as always. His emeral eyes glistened in concern for me.

"Bella are you okay?" this wasn't right, it wasn't Edward's voice I heard but Chris's. My angels voice should sound better then that.

"BELLA!" Chris's voice boomed as I felt a sharp pain on the inside of my left arm.

"Jesus, Chris what the hell did you give her?" I heard Renee ask. "If she OD's I will kill you personally," she swore as another sharp pain ripped through my arm.

"Isabella," my mother commanded, "wake up now or your child is already dead as we speak."

I willed my eyes to open and I watched as Chris lowered a cigarette next to where the pain had been. I barely registered two other burn marks in my arm as the fresh pain seared through me.

"Bella," my mother said to me, her face eerily close to mine, "you need to eat something. I can't have you sick for your first customer."

First customer? Shit already? I realized in that moment, I had to get the hell out of here.

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In case you don't know, tracers are when you see things as if they're moving in slow motion. They also usually seem to be followed by colors. Kind of like when you move your hand all fast in front of your face, and your fingers look funny…except you're moving at normal speed. Plus the drugs that are effecting her are high hallucinogens and often associated with bright colors.

No I've never done drugs, the worst is smoking pot.

Oh and I keep forgetting to tell you guys, you can follow me on twitter if you have it: Jezzeria {as if it would be anything else}

Reviews will make Bella's torture shorter