The office was an outrageously fine affair – books by the hundreds graced the shelves, wall to wall to wall. At the far end, behind a large, mahogany desk that looked fit for a prince, was a wall to ceiling window, displaying the view of the city beyond. Seated at the desk, in a large, wingback leather arm chair, was a blonde haired man in a finely tailored suit of navy. All I could do for the moment was stare blatantly at the man before me, one of the nation's finest publicists. My hand that held my manuscript shook.
"Hello, Miss…?" he asked, his voice a light and buttery affair. It was rather enchanting, and only helped to further clog my brain. I shook it slightly and blurted,
"Swan! Miss Bella Swan…and I'm sorry to bother you at such a short notice and without introducing myself properly, Mr. Cullen, but I really didn't think things through when I decided to come here. I just –"
"Miss Swan!" Mr. Cullen interrupted. I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment, at being scolded by the person she hoped would become her future publicist. "No need to explain or fumble over apologies. Just consider yourself one lucky lady for landing a meeting with me…I know Jacob Black, and he normally is no gentleman when it comes to others taking up his time…so already Fate must have intervened somehow…I am curious as to why you sought out such an impromptu meeting with me. I can only assume that it has something to do with your own future as an author?" He paused, waiting for me to fill him in. I took a deep breath to steady myself.
"You are right, Mr. Cullen –"
"Miss Swan, I know you are accustomed to thinking such institutions as this publishing company resting on formalities such as addressing everyone by their proper title, but from now on, please feel free to call me Carlisle."
"Umm, I'm really not sure how I feel about that…sir," I answered, twisting my fingers in my hands.
"And why is that?" Carlisle questioned in that comforting voice he seemed to own so well.
"Because…well…I hardly know you, and you hardly know me…I don't understand why you'd be so ready to address me in a less formal matter and vice versa when you may never even see me again – if you don't like my novel…" Oops, I'd just told him he might not like what I wrote, an interview no-no and now he may not even want to consider reading it!
"Please, Bella…It is Bella, right?" I nodded, "Bella, really, I take up this policy with all my clients…and future clients, and I really base it more off of the desire to keep everything relaxed and friendly as possible. Now…those who work under me…such as Tanya…they refuse to adhere to this relaxed policy and that is perfectly fine…But really, if you would feel more comfortable calling me by my first name, I just want you to know that you can…" Carlisle finished. I nodded again, then, feeling like an idiot, blushed a deep shade of red.
"Please, Bella, take a seat," Carlisle offered, and, relieved with something to do, I strode forward quickly and took a seat on one of the plush leather armchairs that were situated in front of the desk.
"Thank you…Carlisle," I stuttered.
"So, Bella, what brings you to this firm? I assume that you are an aspiring novelist."
"Yes," I breathed, glad to be on a subject that I felt more confident in discussing with Carlisle. "I have a manuscript with me, here, and I was hoping you could look it over and perhaps…if you liked it…you could publish it?" I asked, still blushing.
"Of course, let's see it, then," Carlisle replied, taking out a pair of reading glasses and getting serious. I placed my manuscript down on the desk and he picked it up, reading the title and chuckling.
"This seems like it shall be a very interesting read. I can't wait. Do you mind waiting while I read it for a bit? Just to assess. If I like it, I'll let you go and I'll take my time going through it and give you a call once I'm done about the next step."
"Sure…go ahead." I watched as Carlisle cracked open the novel and began reading. I felt like my stomach was twisting in knots. All I could do was sit there, twisting my fingers and looking around Carlisle's wonderfully furbished office. I certainly wouldn't mind working here…
And, as was just a habit that I was trying to break these past couple days, when I had any down time, my mind automatically wandered to…Edward. I thought about what it would be like, if I my book did get published and I went back home to Edward. What would he do? Would we celebrate? Would he be happy for me? But, as was per usual these days when I thought about Edward, that hole that existed in my chest grew gaping in size and I could feel my heart shrink and my lungs constrict, making it so hard to breath…And here I was sitting in the middle of an important publisher's office, with the beginnings of hyperventilation and clammy nausea. I had to think of something else!
Quickly, I began thinking about the man that I'd run into before I came to this office…the man who'd given me his spot, when, according to Carlisle, he never did that kind of thing…Jacob…Jacob of the husky, deep voice and puppy-dog eyes, and dark tanned skin…He was quite handsome, now that I thought of it. It was certainly strange what he'd done for me. I wonder what his motivations were.
"Well, I must say, for a first time writer, this is fantastic!" Carlisle exclaimed. I was jolted out of my thoughts and I looked up to see Carlisle grinning at me.
"R-really?" I stuttered.
"Yes, Bella – I am completely drawn in! Your descriptions and ways of bringing the author into the scene are fabulous! The plot, the story of this reclusive pianist! Who knew that they could have such strange, imaginative thoughts and ideas! And his early exploits! You write the male perspective uncommonly well, it's as if you were a man, if you don't mind my saying so," Carlisle amended.
"Oh, well…thanks!" I felt a bubbly tingling surging through my body…it was…success! I was most probably going to become an authoress! I couldn't believe it! I had to tell Alice!
"Well, then, Bella, what I need you to do is simple. Just leave your name and number with me and I will give you a call after I have gone through the complete manuscript and then, we'll set up an appointment and go over everything, getting this editing done as best we can. Then, on from there, I'll send this over to the publishers and we'll be set! You'll be an author in no time and, in my prognostics, on the best sellers list!"
"Really! I can't believe it! And to think that I owe it all to – " And thank heaven, I stopped myself. I had almost said his name aloud…I'd almost said it! Just like that, the hole was open and blazing hot. I felt my good, bubbly feeling melt into a sticky mass inside my chest, making it hard to breathe again. In fact, I just felt like collapsing.
"For what, Bella?" Carlisle's voice startled me out of my internal break down. I tried smiling at him, but it came out weak and unconvincing.
"Umm, nothing, I didn't mean anything," I mumbled, running a hand nervously through my hair.
"Well, please, go ahead and fill out this sheet for me with your contact information and then we'll be all set here," Carlisle advised. I nodded numbly and took up the pen he'd pushed over with the sheet. Filling it out quickly, I set the pen down and stood up.
"Thank you for everything, Carlisle…You don't know happy this has made me," I told him quietly. He nodded, giving me an uneasy, concerned glance. I brushed it off with another weak smile before saying my goodbye and heading out of the office.
Once the door was closed, I leaned against it and let out a shaky breath. I had to get Edward out of my mind soon, or I wouldn't be able to make it to my car in one peace.
"That bad, huh?" a deep, baritone voice accosted me. I startled and whipped my head to the side to see none other than Jacob Black staring at me with a sympathetic smile.
"Uh, no, it actually went very well," I replied politely, closing my fingers around into a fist and heading down the hall back to the reception area. I wasn't sure that I wanted to hang around with Mr. Black. It weirded me out that he'd hung around until I came out. What did he mean by it?
"Oh, well, then why do you look like you've seen a ghost?" he questioned and I snorted and covered my mouth quickly, tears springing to my eyes. He'd never know how close he'd hit to the mark.
"I'm sorry, did I say something upsetting? I didn't mean anything by it, really," Jacob consoled…I shook my head, unable to say anything. I just had to get out of there.
"Well, here, I want you to have this." Jacob grabbed my hand that wasn't covering my mouth and opened it to place a small, white card on it. "It's my number. Call me if you ever need any help with the…writing business…or if you need a friend…"
"T-thanks, I – have to – go, bye," I mumbled, jerking my hand back and pushing past him, speed walking down the hall. I didn't even acknowledge Tanya-the-nail-sharpening-pig-nosed-jerk. I was at the door and out in the rain in two seconds. Once in my car, I let my tears fall and I curled up in the fetal position in the front seat. I sobbed and rocked myself, trying to ignore the pain that was roaring in my chest, trying to get black out those forest green eyes staring blatantly at me behind my closed lids.
"Ed-ward, Ed-ward, Ed-ward," I sobbed, "why? Why did you do this to me?"
It was half an hour before I felt capable of doing anything. I carefully drove back to the hotel and phoned Alice, letting her know the good news, all the while fighting to keep the sadness out of my voice. Thankfully she was blinded by happiness for me that she wasn't as sharp as she usually was. She told me about the work she did with setting up her company online and the nice time at dinner she'd had with Jasper. I gladly clung to the small, unimportant facts she was rambling to me, anything that would get me to focus on something other than Edward.
Afterwards, I felt so spent that I just went to sleep, not bothering to change into pajamas or brush my teeth. I just needed to be unconscious, and I prayed that Edward would not haunt my dreams tonight.
Okay, I have a question for you all that deals with the impending chapters. If you all want, I can glaze through the "Jacob" part all in one chapter, or I can take my time with it and put more depth to the story in the chapters. I know most of you reading this story are Bella/Edward fans.
I am too, strongly and I completely ignore the Jacob/Bella aspect of the series and refuse to acknowledge its existence. However, for the intents and purposes of this story, it is necessary that Jacob become one of the main characters…for the time being, until the plot moves past that.
Since you are the readers, I'm putting it in your hands how you want this to go down. I may or may not put a poll up, but the safest way for you to convey to me whether or not you want a smoother flow to the story or a more choppy-get-through-the-Jacob-parts-as-fast-as-we-can aspect, then send me a review of your preference. I'll count and see whatever the majority is and that is what will happen. Thanks!
Playlist
Half A Heart – The Barenaked Ladies
Some Way Through This – The Black Ghosts
Stormy Weather – The Kooks
Sick Again – Led Zeppelin
Is It Day or Night? – The Runaways
Falling Down – Scarlet Johansson
You're A Wolf – Sea Wolf