A/N: I do not own twilight…

alright, I'm deciding to write more. Lets see…

Reference:

Breaking Dawn

349-358 (between)

Chapter Two

Memories

Edward Cullen

It's always hard to believe that this beautiful creature in front of me could be a monster. I didn't want to think that. I could never think that for I love this creature as much as Bella loved me for what I am. I could never blame Renesmee for what happened to her mother. It was my entire fault, if only I stayed away from her then she would be human and happy with who ever she chooses.

But I could never seem to think that, if that would have happened then I wouldn't have a beautiful girl for me to love more deeply more than life itself. Bella had given me the greatest gift of all, a part of her and a part of me. A proof that we truly did love each other, and Renesmee was going to live forever and that makes it even more worth it.

I do remember when Bella's heart finally stopped beating; it took a lot of strength for me to not leave and take the next flight to Italy. To be with my Bella where ever she is. But Alice brought me back to reality, that I shouldn't just throw my life away like that, I shouldn't be selfish. I couldn't let my child lose her parent in the same week.

She was right; I shouldn't let my child suffer for something that I did to her mother. If I think I'm a monster, how would my child feel when she grows up? When she finds out the real reason why her parents aren't with her anymore.

Besides, this should be a sort of punishment to me. If I'd life forever and still had that memory of Bella's death, that would be a good punishment.

"Get him OUT" she screamed "HE can't BREATHE! Do it NOW!"

"Get it out of her!" Jacob snarled at me, flinging the scalpel at me. "She won't feel a thing!"

Keep it going, Jacob thought furiously as he started CPR on Bella to keep her breathing. You promised, Keep your heart beating.

"Renes…mee. So… beautiful," her voice was so strained. It probably took a lot of strength to even say those words.

One. Two. Three. Four. Jacob counted to keep the rhythm steady.

"Throw it out the window," Jacob suggested when I asked him to hold the baby.

Working over a corpse, I heard Jacob's thoughts when he realized that Bella's heart had stopped beating. It was too late…

"Go then," I snapped at him, I pushed his hands out of the way. I heard a crunch from his fingers, I broke his fingers. I do not care. I need to revive Bella; she can't lose the battle not yet. I pushed on her chest pumping on to it, breathing an air full into her lungs.

"She's not dead," I growled, I was basically yelling myself. I had to have the strength to say this out loud, to comfort myself. "She's going to be fine."

*Jacob phased into his wolf form and jumped out the window, as soon as he hit the ground he howl a piecing cry. And I could hear Seth's cry also. He knows Bella didn't survive.

"Dad," Renesmee said in a whisper, the way she had said my name it seemed like she had said it more than once.

I blinked, my daughter had an annoyed look on her face when she thought I was ignoring her. I didn't realize that I stood there outside in a daze which isn't really normal for vampires.

I examined her from head to toe, she was wearing a long sleeve blouse that showed her navel a bit and a denim skirt that is 3 inches above the knee, but she was wearing leggings to cover her legs since its kind of cold outside. And she's wearing a three inches heals.

A snarl slipped from my lips when I heard Alice giggle beside me. "What have you done to my little girl?" I hissed at her.

"I'm not little!" Renesmee groaned in protest.

Alice rolled her eyes, "She's of legal age—literary,"

I snapped my teeth together and growled at Alice, I was ready to rip her throat off her neck. But then at that exact moment Jasper dashed between me and Alice, he just stood there sending calming signals.

I looked at Renesmee and smiled at her. "Go upstairs and change," I said firmly.

Renesmee glared at me while Alice growled at me.

"We are almost late Edward," Jasper said in one breath since he's trying not to laugh at the girl's reaction and mine.

"Dad, this was supposed to be my punishment, remember…" she said slowly letting me drink in every word she had said. She looked at me and she smiled. She touched my arm and showed me the memory of what she wore this morning. She was wearing something that would cover all her girly curves. "And I'm enjoying all of this," she raised an eyebrow and smiled. She took Alice's arm and both of them started leaping towards the car.

Jasper smirked, when I glared at him he laughed loudly that I felt my ear vibrate.

He stopped laughing and then he looked at me seriously, "Emmett called," he muttered.

I turned away from his intense gaze to Alice and Renesmee who were having a conversation about shopping next week. Then I sighed, "And?"

"He wanted to see if a visit would be alright,"

I couldn't help but hiss through my teeth, ever since Bella's funeral I haven't seen my brother and Rosalie. They come visit the family once in awhile, but I make sure that I go for a hunting trip that day with Renesmee. So they haven't seen me for 21 years or even met Renesmee yet.

Rosalie is sorry, you should know that. Why do you think she left the family? She feels like she doesn't deserve the love that the family is giving her when she knows that you and her cant stay in the same roof. Jasper thought, when we noticed that Renesmee looked at us when I hissed.

I ignored the inquiries that my daughter is asking and I smiled at her. Then I looked at Jasper, "They can come for a visit, besides Renesmee and I need to go hunting some time soon."

Jasper hissed. He clenched his fists together, "You have to face them some time."

I nodded, "But I still don't want to, Rosalie doesn't deserve to set her eyes on my daughter. Emmett can visit by himself if he wants. But if Rosalie is coming, then a hunting trip would be best for me and my child." I said firmly emphasizing on the word daughter and child.

Jasper sighed in defeat, "Just wanting to tell you," then he dashed off to go to Alice's side and giving her a quick kiss, and told her that he doesn't want to go to school today. He was too mad to be even in the same car with me for the next few minutes.

I tried to block everyone's thoughts as we lowered Bella's coffin down the ground. It was a private funeral, just us Cullens and Seth Clearwater. Jacob couldn't even be here to say goodbye to Bella, he was too scared that if he sees Renesmee he might not be able to stop himself from killing my child.

The only thoughts that I wasn't blocking was my own child's, Renesmee is in my arms, and she wasn't looking at the coffin anymore. She was sobbing in my arms, she understood what is happening. She couldn't be held by her mother anymore. That will be the last time that she would be able to see her mother and she didn't even want that to be the only reminder of her.

I pitted my daughter, I was furious at myself for not being able to revive Bella. That I was too late. I held my daughter tighter in my arms, her cries echoed in everyone's head. The only memory she had of her mother was on that painful night. But at least she knew that her mother had loved her deeply. She saw her mother's face when Bella held her. And that was the only sweet memory she had. Her mother's beautiful smile.

I felt a hot-fire touch on my shoulder, "I am so sorry for you loss Edward," Seth said me he had a small smile on his face—a comfort smile. His eyes flickered towards my daughter, he ran his hands on her curly hair, "She's beautiful," he breathed.

Renesmee turned towards the boy who gave her a compliment, I heard him gasped when his eyes were locked into hers. Bella's… he thought

I nodded, "She may have my looks but every time I'm going to look at her, I'm going to be reminded of Bella all the time. Just through her eyes."

Renesmee looked at me, confusion filled her eyes. She touched my face images playing in her head the first time she laid her eyes at her mother, but the focus was more on her mother's eyes.

I flinched at the memory, I wasn't ready to see that yet. But I understand her question, "Yes, you have your mother's eyes. Just like hers." I breathed I planted a long kiss on her forehead.

Renesmee smiled an excited smile when she realized that she has something of her mothers, she laid her head back on my chest, closing her eyes. She was too exhausted to even fight sleep.

Edward, a voice called me. I didn't look I didn't want to talk to the person who is at fault for my wife's death. Though I love this child in my arms, Rosalie shouldn't have feed Bella those poison about being able to survive having the child.

Seth could see the fury in my eyes when he noticed Rosalie walking towards us. Seth looked at me then he slowly walked away, he was far enough that would give me and her privacy but close enough to stop me from doing anything rash. But it didn't matter, Emmett and Jasper was also close enough.

"Edward, your not really leaving, are you?" Rosalie whispered, her voice was broken and her face torn. I didn't care if she felt bad, if she had blamed herself for Bella's death too.

A growled rumbled under my chest, it wasn't loud enough to wake up my sweet Renesmee but it did make her stir in my arms. "What my life is going to be from now on is none of your business." I said coldly.

Rosalie flinched at my coldness, but she shook her head. She felt that she deserved it. "Don't, don't go. If someone should leave it should be me," she whispered.

I shook my head, "I don't want Emmett to go homeless. My daughter and I will be alright. We already have a house in West Virginia,"

She lowered her head as a sob had escaped her chest, "Edward, please." she begged.

"I apologize for being rude to you Rosalie, but I do not see you as family anymore. This isn't the first time you wanted Bella dead. To me, you are just my brother's wife." I said in a conviction that I'm sure broke her heart. But I didn't care, she should know that she had broken my heart twice—all because of her selfishness. Her vanity.

Emmett growled loudly that Renesmee woke up. I just looked at Emmett. I wasn't mad at Emmett.

Renesmee looked at me confused, looking for the origin of the noise. She still looked sleepy, I started to hum Bella's lullaby and slowly she drifted back to sleep. I grinned at this thought, she is so like Bella. I kissed her forehead a sob escaped my lips. "Please Rosalie leave me alone, I'm not ready to forgive you," I whispered.

Rosalie flitted to Emmett's sobbing.

"Everything is going to be alright, sweet Renesmee,"

"Dad," I heard Renesmee yell at me again through the glass window of the car, we arrived at the school and I didn't come out of the car yet. I don't know how long I've been sitting in the car because Alice wasn't there already. She was already in the school's office waiting for me and Renesmee.

I got out of the car and I rested my hand on her head, her brown eyes locked into mine. I gave her a smile.

Dad, she grinned,"You have to stop daydreaming, its' bad." She rolled her eyes. She took my hand and pulling me towards the building across the car.

Bella, if only you could be here to see how beautiful and perfect our daughter has become…


a/n:

Legend *

This basically meant that Jacob haven't seen Renesmee… which means he didn't imprint on her. Alright, I hope you like this… please, please review!