I know I took so long to get this up, but it's here now, and you can read it. Sorry if it disappoints, but the next few chapters are the real bang of this story and I can't wait to write them. Enjoy this one for what it is.

Jacob wanted to come back to the hotel with me, but I refused the offer. While I knew Jacob was exercising old habits, I gently let him know that I was tired and didn't generally invite a man home after a first date. He didn't take it too hard. He tried to kiss me though, and I almost let it happen.

After Jacob had told me his story, we walked back to his car. Our ride was silent, and I let him hold my hand on the way. The air was still ripe with tension from our discussion and I didn't want to spoil it with mindless, meaningless small talk.

When we pulled up to the hotel, Jacob parked and walked me to my door.

"Goodnight, Bells. Thank you for listening to me and for giving me a chance…Without that – I don't know if I'd have been able to forgive myself…"

"It's okay, Jacob. I'm happy you could confide in me. I understand how hard it is to tell someone your secrets, and I want you to know that I hope we can keep in touch." Jacob smiled at me then, and leaned down. I was aware, suddenly, of how close we were and a slight clenching in my stomach alerted me to my discomfort.

As his lips came closer to my face, I prepared myself to accept it, but it seemed that the closer he got, the more wrong it felt. All I could see were Edward's lips, Edward's beautiful face as he gazed at me, the loving look that crept into his eyes as we looked at each other. At the split second before Jacob's lips touched mine, I saw Edward's face and a look of pure pain and sadness and it broke my heart. I turned my head to the side and Jacob's lips collided with my cheekbone.

When he pulled back, Jacob had a strange look on his face that I couldn't interpret. I diffused the tension by wishing him a good night and quickly entered my room and closed the door, leaving him out in the hall.

Once the door was closed, I stood for a moment with my hand on the doorknob, frozen. I stared at the place where Jacob had been on the other side of the door, picturing his face.

"He doesn't understand." I sucked in a breath at the sound of his voice.

"What doesn't he understand?" I whispered, unsure if I'd get my answer. I thought I felt the cold brush of fingers pulling my hair away from my neck, but as soon as I felt it, the feeling disappeared.

"He doesn't understand how special you are…That you're not like the others…I swear to Heaven if he hurts you…" the voice growled. I whimpered and pressed my forehead against the cheap wood of the motel door, my hand falling from the knob.

"What are you doing to me? What others?! Why can't I stop thinking about this! About you!!"

"Baby, you're shaking."

"STOP IT!!!" I shrieked, slamming my hand against the door. I waited, but I heard nothing. I wasn't aware that I was shaking until now. I sob ripped through my throat and I sank to the floor, my back against the door. I don't how long I sat there, crying, but I awoke the next morning from my stupor, sore, depressed, and lonely.

I made my way over to the bedside table and picked up my phone. Fifteen missed calls and messages. I sighed and pressed the phone to my ear.

"Bella Swan, it's me, your best friend Alice Brandon. You remember me, right? Well it looks as though I missed your call, now why have you missed mine? Call me back and maybe we can get to the bottom of this puzzling mystery! You know my number."

"Bella – it's Alice –"

"Bella!"

"Bel –"

I deleted one frantic message after the other until I got a message with a male voice.

"Hey, Bella, how's it going? It's Carlisle. Well, I've read your novel and, surprise, surprise, I love it! You, young lady, are on your way to the best sellers list if I have anything to say about it, and I do because I'm your publicist. Let's meet as soon as you're available – just drop on by and let Tanya at reception know that you're ready to see me – and then we can discuss the details. Thank you so much for choosing our firm as your publisher and I promise you, we will not disappoint. I'll see you later. Thank you, bye."

I let out a huge lungful of air, and felt some of my depression fade and a sense of well-deserved accomplishmenttake over.

With that happy feeling pervading my body, I called Alice.

"Well, well, well," Alice answered, "So she is alive."

"I'm sorry I've missed your calls, Alice…I was asleep…and I've been through a lot in the past few days…It's all been rather crazy – I have so much to tell you about."

And I told her everything, while excluding the parts that concerned my hallucinations about Edward. Alice was elated for me, and her enthusiasm was enough to pull me out of my slump. In that moment, I told her about Jacob and my mixed feelings about him – which was hard since I couldn't say that I was already in love with someone, because that would lead to her questioning who and I certainly couldn't tell her about Edward.

Alice was excited that I'd found someone and she did what my body and heart just couldn't do themselves – she gave me her approval to take things further with Jacob.

If I didn't have Alice's approval, I don't know if I wouldn't have done what I did next after ending my conversation with Alice. I called Jacob and asked him on another date.

Of course, I knew that I'd be leaving later that day, after I had finished talking with Carlisle about my book deal, but Jacob was more than willing to come up to Forks, not only to see me, but also to catch up with his father. I was sure that this arrangement would make things difficult for myself, since I'd be allowing Jacob to come to my home…which housed the ghost that I loved.

A part of me though that this was a bad idea, that this could lead to a confrontation…if Edward did decide to show himself…But another part of me wanted that particular thing to happen. I wanted to see what would happen if Edward actually saw me with another man, for it was one thing for him to think it was important for me to move on and find someone who I could "actually" be with, and a completely different thing for him to see it right there in action, happening in his own house.

And with this part of me, there was another part that was hopeful that Edward would not be okay with seeing me with another man and would show himself to me again and take me back. I knew, in my mind, that this was weak of me, hoping for a ghost that rejected me to take me back, but I didn't care. I loved Edward and I knew he loved me. I just wished he wasn't such a martyr, willing to give up his own happiness and thrust me out into the world to find a much more solid, substantial love. But such was the way things were.

With my decisions in place, I headed off to see Carlisle, where we hashed out the necessary decisions and details that would get my book on the shelves. I told him that I was willing to give him most of the project, that I wasn't pushy about what the cover looked like or the font, that I was happy enough to have it published. Thankfully, Carlisle's firm was the big initiator in getting the process done and Carlisle told me I wouldn't have to be very much involved and he'd call me if he ever needed me to come down to Seattle again to sort through things.

After tying up all these loose ends, I felt free enough to pack things up and head home. I wasn't sure what would happen once I got there, if I would get luck and Edward would give up and reveal himself to me again. I didn't know what would happen the following Friday when Jacob would come up to Forks and we would have our second date. I wasn't sure what I would let happen that time, if I'd let him kiss me. I wanted it to be for the right reasons, and really, if I wasn't kidding myself, I knew that I would want him to kiss me right smack there in the middle of the living room, surely in front of Edward, wherever he was. I would shake Edward's world to the ground if I had to, to get him to show himself again. That I knew in my very core.

What I didn't expect was for my feelings for Jacob to grow…

***

It had been three whole weeks since I'd returned from Forks and life was…better. I had come back uncertain, but when Edward didn't show…I knew my answer and Jacob became a fixture in my life that I was beginning to depend upon. It was a quirk in life that I hadn't been expecting. When I brought Jacob home for the first time after I'd returned, I was expecting the worst…or deep in my heart, the best: that Edward would show. And what happened instead was…nothing.

Not a whisper, and not even that tickling feeling that I got at the back of my neck at times when I knew he was around…He was just…not there. And, instead of sinking me…Jacob was there as my buoy. He kept me floating…and I saw him after that day. And again. And again.

On our fourth date he took me on a picnic near his father's house…I let him kiss me this time, on the mouth. It was sweet…like biting into a strawberry. His mouth was warm and savory…It was nothing like his kiss, but I was pulling away from the comparisons, I was shutting off that part of my life…and I was finding that I was okay with moving forward. Jacob helped with that.

We were a solid couple now. Even Alice had met him and approved. She was planning a big double date for us…not that I was excited about that. Jacob loved Alice, he thought she was a riot. I could still catch glimpses of his snobbish self, but they were few and far between now.

My work at the bookstore was going well. Charlie was happy and he made my life better by being in it. I was in constant touch with Carlisle as well. In fact, the book was all set to go to print and I was taking a small trip down to Seattle to have a final meeting with Carlisle about the font and the cover art. I was also planning on making a small surprise visit to see Jacob at his home in Seattle. He was there now, settling a few business meetings. He had told me of his address in passing, but he'd never invited me there before. I thought that with a good surprise, we could finally make the next step in our relationship.

Alice was there to kiss me on the cheek and wish me good luck. I gave her a quick smile before pulling out in my car and heading down the road to Seattle. On the way, I thought about how I was feeling…It took me a moment to figure out that the difference between how I felt now and how I felt just weeks ago was…that I could actually breathe. I didn't have that hole in my chest anymore. And it was…freeing. I had a smile on my face the rest of the ride over.

I found Jacob's house easily enough. It was in the more suburban area of Seattle, big mansions sheltered by thick trees and approachable only by large, wandering driveways. I was in awe of the place and a little excited to see the inside of it.

Jacob's house was a pale shade of blue, at least three stories and seemed to go on forever in the back. When I rung the bell, a maid answered. A maid!

"How can I help you?" the older woman dressed in deep black asked.

"Yes, um, I'm here to see Jacob," I told her brightly. A look crossed the woman's face…one, it seemed, of knowing and I was sure she was going to say something, but instead, she just pressed her lips into a thin line and nodded.

"Right this way," she whispered, leading me into the depths of the house. We walked passed large, spacious rooms with beautiful, soft carpeting. The woman stopped just outside a warm, cream colored room with plush looking sofas and a fire place with a beautiful landscape above the mantle.

"Wait in here," she demanded, then left. Hesitantly, I stepped into the room. I made my way to the couch nearest the sofa and sat down, marveling in the softness. I just sank into it. It was the most comfortable thing I'd ever sat on. I was just smoothing my hands over the surface when I heard a slight, tinkling giggle.

Turning my head, I saw a tall, lean woman with jet-black hair standing in the doorway to the room.

"Um, hi?" I greeted her.

"Hello, there," she answered, stepping further into the room. "Are you waiting for Jacob?"

"Yes, actually," I replied, rubbing a hand against the back of my neck.

"Oh, and you are?" the woman asked, coming to sit on the couch across from me. Up close I could see how truly beautiful she was…I was really kind of jealous. Her hair was silky smooth and hung past her shoulders. Her neck was elegant and long and her skin just as tan as Jacob's. She actually looked like they could be related.

"Bella Swan," I supplied, reaching out my hand. "Do you work for Jacob?" A crease formed between her brows as she frowned in confusion at me. I felt almost as if I had gotten something wrong, and it was the same feeling I got when the maid had questioned me. I didn't like it. I felt a flush creep into my cheeks as the woman before me shook her head and gave me a smile.

"No, dear, I don't work for Jacob…My name is Leah. Surely Jacob has told you about me? I know he's awfully fond of you and all that…Surely he doesn't keep secrets?" She gave me a simpering smile and I felt as though I were being treated as a child. This time, I frowned.

"No…He never said anything about you. Should he have?" The woman, Leah, laughed that tinkling laugh I'd heard before and smirked.

"Dear, dear. It looks as if our Jacob has gotten himself into a little predicament that I'm going to have to end up remedying. You see, I know all that he does and it's all fine by me, but…well if the other's don't know, it's his fault for not saying so…and that's where I draw the line and step in…You should be given a choice, after all. That's what I believe. Ah, well…" She sighed and cocked her head, considering me.

"Listen, I don't understand what you're talking about. What do you mean 'others'?" What I really wanted to say was "What do you mean by "our Jacob." What on earth could this woman and I have in common about Jacob that would make her say "our"?

Leah reached out a hand and stroked my cheek. "And I was so sure you were okay with it, that he'd told you. I thought that's the only reason why you'd given him a chance at all? I was surprised when he'd come back telling me that he was hanging out with you…I know your type, Bella Swan, and they don't usually like sharing…But, he seemed so happy with it, I decided to let it be…But now, with you showing up here like this without any notice…I know now what we're dealing with. I really should reprimand him for letting it get this out of hand!" Leah chuckled and let her hand fall.

"Please, just tell me who you are and where Jacob is so I can talk to him. I just don't understand!" I felt like crying. What Leah was saying was scaring me and I didn't' like it. It was all to eerie and my mind was beginning to assume things that I didn't want to believe just yet.

"Dear, dear, no need to get upset…But my, you are a pretty one, aren't you? One of the prettiest Jacob's ever brought by, I must say…It is a pity that you won't be hanging on for long now…I can tell."

"Stop it!" I shrieked. "Just say it, say what it is you want to say and then leave me alone!"

And then she said the words that I feared the most but knew in my heart, now, to be true.

"Honey, I'm Leah Black. I'm Jacob's wife."

Wife.

Wife.

Leah Black. Leah. The words echoed around my head until I couldn't think straight anymore. I couldn't see straight. And then I hit the floor.

Soooooooooo. Cliff hanger!!!! You thought I wouldn't do that to you? Well, sorry, it's just the way things happen. And I know it will make some angry and they'll want to through things at me or punch me in the face, but hey, I'm sure you've done it at one point or another in your writing, so I have my own right. Plenty of authors have done it to me as well and I know what a slap in the face it can be, but just SIU it. (Suck It Up). Deal. It's over, the words have been written and the chapter has been finalized. It is what it is and there's no stopping it. Wait for the next chapter. Cheers. Review. I don't care if their "hate reveiws" "burns" or what ever. Just pleases me to know you all care enough about this story to even write back in the first place.

Playlist:

One and Only – Barenaked Ladies

Some Way Through This – The Black Ghosts

Tiny Little Fractures – Snow Patrol

The Ghost of You Lingers – Spoon

42 - Coldplay