"Edward Masen? Do you mean that guy whose portrait's in your bedroom? But, Bella, I thought you said he was dead…I don't understand…" Alice got that look in her eye that I knew too well…she was trying to work it out on her own. I had to stop her before she drew any conclusions.

"Alice, I know this isn't going to sound right…and you'll probably think I'm crazy, but –"

"Bella, I won't think you're crazy. You're my best friend, I've known you for years. If you were going to go crazy, I would have had a feeling by now," she insisted, grabbing my hand and squeezing it. I only felt marginally better about this.

"Well, I don't know about that, Alice, but it's going to sound pretty crazy…"

"If you could tell Jasper and he's okay with it, then of course I'll be okay with it. I know you. I know you."

I sighed and ran a hand through my limp hair. Alice was making it so hard for me to let it go. She was so trusting already, and that would just make it sting worse if she ended up not believing me. But I knew I had to tell her. She had a right to now.

"Alice, Edward Masen is dead…he's a ghost that's been haunting my – his – house for a while now…I fell in love with him weeks ago and…well…he disappeared on me because he didn't want me to be hung up on someone who was dead, who couldn't be there for me like a living person could…And so…well…that's why I'd been so depressed lately…You remember." I chanced a glance at her face. I was expecting shock, horror, perhaps revulsion…but Alice, forever steady Alice, only gave me a weak smile.

"Yes, I remember. Go on, sweetie," she prompted.

"Well…it was right before I turned in that story…And while I was down in Seattle, I met Jacob…And you know that story," I hedged, not wanting to get into that story. Alice sighed beside me and I looked up yet again, to see a crease form between her brows.

"What?" Alice shook her head for a moment.

"Bella, I know that part of the reason you're here is to talk to me about that…I had a feeling this would happen…you know how I am."

"You had a feeling about Jacob?" I questioned, frowning myself.

"Yes…when we first met, when he came up here…I just felt…Something was…off. I don't know." Alice shook her head again and gave me an apologetic smile.

"You had a feeling about Jacob and you didn't tell me?" I gasped, a little incensed.

"Sorry, Bella."

"No, you should have told me!" I cried, tears pricking my eyes. "If you had, I wouldn't have gotten in so deep! You know I trust you about those kinds of things!"

"Bella, sweetie, I didn't say anything because you were finally starting to perk up! You were looking so much better than you had been…And I didn't want to ruin that! And besides, if you kept this thing with Edward from me! You don't think that was a big deal? Huh? Wouldn't that have been an important thing for me to know?" Alice gave me a cross look and I dropped my head.

"I'm sorry, Alice," I conceded. I knew she was right. We had both been less than open with each other and it was no use pointing fingers.

"So, what happened then, with Jacob?" Alice prompted me. I looked up at her and a new flood of tears lined my eyes.

"He's married!" I cried and buried my head in our clasped hands. I felt Alice's free hand stroke my hair as she exclaimed her dismay.

"I don't believe it! Married! What a – Well, there aren't words strong enough to call him what he is…I can't believe he'd do something like that to you…"

"I know," my muffled voice called. My head felt too heavy to raise, what with all the weight of this sadness upon me. "I met his wife down in Seattle when I was going to surprise him…He came in and then he spilled everything…It…was…awful!" I sobbed.

"There, there, sweetie," Alice murmured. I cried for another period of time, before I raised my head and looked at my best friend.

"Edward even warned me about him…and I didn't listen…" I whimpered.

"What do you mean, Edward warned you?" Alice questioned, frowning again. I had surprised myself by telling her that. I hadn't even thought about it much myself until now…All those times that Edward had appeared to me, trying to tell me something…It had made me feel worse at the time and I'd just attributed it to my heart and mind playing games with me, bringing me what I most wanted to see…But now I felt as if Edward had really been there, had been trying to help me without breaking his promise to me not to bother me any longer.

"He…he would show up at times…whenever I was feeling…particularly down…and he, he'd tell me not to get involved with Jacob…that I was different and Jacob didn't know that, wouldn't respect that…I should have listened! Oh Edward!" I sobbed even harder. "I've betrayed him, Alice! I told him I loved him. I still love him and here I was, getting so close to Jacob! I nearly gave my heart to him. How could I be so stupid! How could I be so misled! How could I give my heart up when it already belongs to someone else! Edward doesn't deserve me!" I dropped my head again, this time the weight feeling millions of times larger than it had before…

I felt so heavy with it, like I was going to sink down into the earth. My heart, which for that sweetest time when I was with him beat only for Edward, but then I went and mangled that love, that ownership by nearly trusting it to Jacob, a man I barely knew, who I had felt suspicious of from the start…My own eyes had failed to see the warning signs. Instead, they'd been blinded by Jacob's beauty, and I had swallowed all of Jacob's words as if they were my only sustenance. How could Edward ever forgive me now?

"Bella, Edward will forgive you." I looked up at Alice. I must have said that last part allowed, or Alice's mind reading abilities had improved. She looked so sure, so confident. How could I believe it , though. She didn't know Edward.

"Alice, you can't know that."

"I don't have to know it. It's obvious. Bella, I know he loves you back, I can feel how strong his love for you is."

"How-how," I stuttered, confused.

"I just do, Bella. Being around you those few weeks back…I felt something was different about you. I didn't know about Edward, sure, but there was a glow about you…And it wasn't just that…I felt…this presence…as if there was someone standing beside you all the time, moving with you, feeling with you, as if they were a part of you, protecting you. I know I sound crazy now, but I swear, Bella. And that feeling hasn't gone away. Even when you were with Jacob, I still felt it. And I'm pretty sure that what I was feeling was probably Edward's presence. I don't think he's left your side since you first met. I know he loves you and I know that whatever you choose to do, Edward will be there for you…He's a very protective ghost…I approve," she decided, nodding her head decisively.

I merely started blankly at her.

"Bella, come on. I get that you were afraid I would be freaked at you falling for a ghost and all…but it's not that strange when you think about it…His life had only just begun when he died, right? Well, obviously he was meant to be with you. He had to wait, he had to stay around because he hadn't met you yet. It wasn't his time to go. He needs you just as much as you need him. And if anyone can care for you better than me…well…that's saying something and I approve. You don't have anything to worry about. Whatever happened with Jacob, Edward will understand. In fact," Alice smiled wryly. "I think he'd probably take care of Jacob if you asked him to." I just shook my head at that.

"He probably would take care of Jacob regardless," I guessed. "I know what kind of temper he has. He's not the kind to just sit around when someone's done wrong by him. "

"You see!" Alice giggled. Then, suddenly, she hugged me.

"What's that for, Alice?" I asked after we'd pulled back. She smiled at me and shook her head, tears of her own popping up in her eyes.

"I'm just glad that you could confide in me about this, Bella…It took guts and I'm proud of you and happy all at the same time!"

"Alice, I'm so glad that you're my friend. I love you."

"I love you too, Bella Swan!" We both hugged and sobbed until we didn't have any tears left.

*

It was late by the time I had left Alice and Jasper's. The Weight was still there, but I was feeling better now that I had confided in Alice. My stomach churned, though, as I approached my house. I knew that Edward was probably there…but who knew if I would be able to get him to come out.

I was determined though. I needed this and I needed him. Alice had helped me realize just how precious my feelings for Edward were and I wasn't about to let him go without a fight. I wanted him and Jacob made me realize I wouldn't have any other than Edward. He was mine and I was his and I was going to make him see that.

The door squeaked as I opened it. Stepping inside, I felt the coolness of the air against my skin, goose bumps prickling my arms. I squared my shoulders, though, and marched in. I went straight to my bedroom, knowing that that would be the best place to find him. It was our space and he was always so much more real there.

"Edward?" I whispered, still not sure why I was whispering. There was no response and I felt a little disheartened.

"Edward, I need you please…You were right about Jacob…He…he hurt me and I – I know you're the only one who can fix it…I just…Please don't leave me alone anymore…" I waited a beat and felt the cold start to tug at the insides of my heart…He couldn't just let me be…not after what I'd been through…

"I know you're there – now show yourself…Please," I finally whimpered, feeling tears prick my eyes. "I need you." I buried my face in my hands. A moment later there was a ghostly fluttering against the skin of my hand.

"I know I've told you not to hide that pretty face of yours before," his velvety voice greeted my ears for the first time in what felt like forever. I felt a fluttering in my heart and suddenly it was not enough that I could just hear his voice. I allowed him to bring my hands away from my face, his touch a spark against my chilled skin – a testament against his previous notions that he could only bring me cold. I looked gratefully into his swimming green orbs, those eyes that brought the world to a spinning halt. How I'd longed for them when I could no longer have the right to…It felt as if I were seeing for the first time.

"I'm sorry – I" I tried to start, but he stopped me.

"Shhh," he hushed, brushing the few stray tears that had spilled from my eyes off of my cheeks. "Just let me take care of you, Bella." I felt my heart zing at the sound of him using my first name. After all the time that we'd known each other, he'd only ever called me Swan… I thought I'd never hear him say my name again.

"Edward," I sighed. His name on my lips and I felt like I could die right there and be happy. I just wanted him to hold me.

"Bella..." He smiled, but the sadness in his eyes told me that we weren't over the hardest part yet. "I know you have every reason to hate me, but I must tell you that it is I who should be sorry…And I shall spend eternity begging for your forgiveness if you'll just have me back." I felt a tug at my heart, hearing his velvety voice, so broken like that. I couldn't let him spend another second thinking that he needed forgiveness.

"Just stop thinking about that and tell me you can still love me?" I pleaded, my heart beating in my throat as I waited for his answer. If he couldn't love me anymore, I'd die and spend the rest of my eternity begging him to forgive me.

A fierceness took hold of Edward's eyes as his hands became manacles around my wrists and he brought me forward so that our faces were nearly inches apart, his eyes locked with me.

"I will always love you, Bella Swan and you will never doubt my love again." And with that, his hand sunk into the depths of my hair and he fiercely pressed his lips to mine.

Playlist

Swan Song – A Fine Frenzy

Believe Me Now – Electric Light Orchestra

Thank You – Led Zeppelin

I Will Follow You into the Dark – Death Cab for Cutie

Yes – Coldplay

Well, I apologize for the long wait. Computer problems mostly. Anyhow, I hope you liked the chapter. The end of the story is near and I've already got lots of ideas for this new story that I'm going to write. You guys will love it I swear! Well, leave me your comments and I'll be one happy writer. Cheers!