*I don't own The Outsiders.

(DPOV)

The obnoxious sound of my alarm clock once again woke me up. I hated getting up in the morning. It was a fight to get to the kitchen; the only thing that helped was knowing the sooner I get there the sooner I get some coffee. The sooner I have my coffee, the sooner I can relax in the shower. My daily routine.

The first week Leslie was gone was the hardest. I didn't even want to get up for those first few days, but I did. My brothers are counting on me and I can't let them down just because I miss her.

None of the gang are oblivious to my off behavior, they just ignored it. I'm glad they did. I don't need them bugging me about it. We all worry about Leslie over there in the middle of a jungle with a war going on around her, but I know I took it the worse. Pony took it pretty hard too, though he tried not to show it.

Leslie and Pony are good pals, despite the age six year age difference. She liked, I mean likes, to read like he does. A lot of times they'd both read some book then discuss it later, poor kid misses that. I hate that he has something else to frown about, something else to miss, to hurt over.

I hate her not being here. She belongs here with all of us. She's the girl of the gang, the one we all protect and watch over. She's got a big heart and likes to take care of all of us. We might be greasers, but who the hell doesn't like to be babied once in awhile?

I miss her so much. Why did I have to realize I loved her before she leaves for Vietnam? How wrong is that? I've known her my entire life and I never realized I loved her like that until she left, until I lost her. She's not lost though, just gone for a year.

It just seems so long. I sit here waiting, no phone calls, no surprise visits like when she lived in Texas, nothing. At first, I thought maybe she'd be able to get a phone call in once in awhile. Leslie hasn't been able to. I talked to her Father in the grocery store the other night, he hasn't heard from her either.

I use to worry about not hearing from her, it scared me a bit. I knew we wouldn't be able to have conversations like we use to, but I expected that she might be able to at least call and say "Hey, still alive, it's okay."

I haven't gotten that much, not even a letter. I shouldn't have expected it, she is in the middle of a war zone. I was just worried with how she was dealing with the stress over there.

Leslie doesn't like to admit when she's in trouble, if someone around her has it worse off than her than she's not going to complain. She doesn't think she has the right to complain. She has to know you real well to ever say anything real negative. I think she's like that because one, keeps drama away and that's how she likes it, and two, she has a screwed up guilt complex.

She's so strange, I like it though. She's easy to understand once you get to know her too, I like that too. No, I love that.

What worries me the most, is something is wrong or she's upset but won't bother to talk to someone to help herself. I hope she doesn't feel like she has to help everyone else and forget about her needs. I don't want her to come back changed, it scares me. You hear stories about soldiers, doctors, nurses, and other officials coming home from their stay over seas and not being the same.

Some get hooked on drugs, others come home without limbs, it horrifies me. I know she's a nurse and not actually fighting but what will it do to someone like her to witness all of that. It's not like she can save everyone, I hope she understands that.

The steaming hot cup of coffee assaults my senses, I don't know why Pony and Soda don't like coffee. They're crazy I suppose. I don't know if I want to see Soda jacked up on caffeine first thing in the morning. That might be a little difficult to handle.

Might be worth it to see Steve trying to hold on to his limited patience. I couldn't hold back the chuckle of laughter at the thought. Then of course Soda would purposely bug him more, I shook my head. God knows what would happen if you mixed a drunk Two-Bit and a caffeinated Soda up together.

Funny until they break something and I need to fix it. I closed me eyes, then Leslie would lay a hand on my shoulder saying it's not that big a deal. Together it'll only take an hour or so to fix the hole in the wall, afterward we can go to the Dingo and leave everyone to fend for themselves except Ponyboy and Johnny.

Only problem is, she's not here.

It's one of the reasons I've been working so much lately, taking so much over time. It helps keep me busy, which is good. Not to mention the extra money in the bank is always a plus. Soda and Pone tell me I work too much and that it's not good for me, but they're wrong.

I enjoy working. A hard day's work and a good night's sleep, I'm not asking for much.

They're not stupid, they know why I've been working so much. I heard Pone talking to Soda one night.

"You'd think he'd find a better way to cope being without her than working." Pony murmured.

"Her loves her. It just took him forever to figure it out. Mom always use to say they'd end up together. I'm a hundred percent positive that Leslie would love being with Darry." Soda told Pone.

"Mothers know best and all that jazz." He responded, I could tell he was smiling.

Soda laughed, "And all that jazz."

Everyone knew I was in love but me.

(SPOV)

I felt real bad for Darry. I know what he's going through. When Sandy left me, it hurt so much. The fact she cheated on me stung something awful too. For a long time it was like someone punched me in the chest and I never got over those first few minutes of pain.

Eventually, it started to hurt less then one day I moved on.

Dar, however, wasn't able to move on. He knew Leslie would be coming home so he wasn't going to let go.I can't imagine having to wait so long for someone. Darry, Superman, can do it though.

All of us were horrified and scared when she told us she was going off to 'Nam to nurse. We all asked why she couldn't stay here and nurse. Save lives on good safe American soil, instead of being in the middle of all that over there.

I've seen the videos on the news, I pray every night for Leslie. I pray that none of us end up in that jungle. I don't know if I could handle watching all the guys get shipped off to war. Especially, Johnny and Pony, anyone but those two.

Leslie is my sister. I know she ain't blood related but it doesn't matter, she's apart of my family. She's come every day to my house since she and Darry were little kids. Some of my first memories are playing in the back yard with the two of them.

We had a lot of fun making mud pies and stuff. Mom would get so mad when she saw our clothing afterwards though. I smiled at the memory.

Dar took her leaving this time harder than the first time, when she went off to her Mom's. He finally realized what he's been feeling all these years. It was obvious to everyone except those two.

Dar is too stubborn, it took a while to get through that thick head of his. Leslie loves everyone so much, but I have a feeling she knows she loves him already. She just needs Dar to make the first move is all. Then it'll be fireworks for my older brother.

Once she's home, I bet everything will fall in place. I hope she's okay. We haven't heard from her and we all miss her. I bet she misses us. Darry at least has the entire gang to hang out with, she has nurses she doesn't know and broken and dying soldiers all around her.

It's hard for me to see her in an environment like that. She's always so happy, I hope this doesn't loose that from seeing God knows what. Leslie's tough so I'm not too worried. It's just a matter of waiting it all out.

Everyone will be happy in the end, I hope.

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