Tis the Season to be Gabby

By

JerseyGirlinOxford

A/N: A special prompt was added for Xylia's Most Wonderful Time of the Year Challenge on BabeSquad. We want more of Where's Your Balls.

Part Three

After dinner, Steph needed to pump so she let Gabby hold the baby. Ranger stared at his children. He couldn't believe how complete his life was. He had a gorgeous wife and two beautiful children. "Daddy?"

"What Gabby?"

"He don't do much. All he does is sleep and kiss Mommy's boobies. He can't even eat Christmist cookies." Ranger sighed.

"He's just a baby, Gabby. Before you know it, he'll be walking and talking then he'll be able to play with you," he explained.

"Really?" Ranger nodded. "I love my baby brudder. But, his penis is a lot smaller than TJ's." Ranger furrowed his brow. He didn't know which was worse. Gabby insulting the size of his son's penis or that his three and a half year old daughter was comparing penises. He didn't think defending his son's manhood and explaining that it was going to get bigger was the right thing to say. Luckily, Steph had finished and come back into the living room. "What you got Mommy?" Steph had two small baby jars of breast milk.

"This is more milk for the baby, Sweet Pea," she explained. Good, Ranger thought, something to take her mind off penis inspection. Steph put the jars in the refrigerator. She paused in the doorway to take in the scene of Gabby holding the baby. "Hold on a second. I have to get a picture of this." She got the camera and took several pictures of Gabby and Little Carlos. Then, she took some of Ranger, Gabby, and Little Carlos. Ranger switched places and took pictures of Steph with the children.

Forgotten were the profanity, the fall into the Christmas tree, and the critique of his son's genitals. This was a special time with his family. And, he still had a special surprise. The Merry Men all chipped in and had gotten Gabby a Christmas present. Santos volunteered to dress as Santa to surprise Gabby. He didn't even tell Stephanie so it would be a surprise for her, too. "Let's get this tree decorated, Gabby," Ranger said.

"Yea! Christmist tree!" Gabby ran over to the box of decorations. She reached in and pulled out a metallic blue ornament. "Look Daddy…I gots a blue ball. Do you gots blue balls, too?" Ranger cringed. Stephanie snorted.

"Yeah…for about 6 weeks," Stephanie muttered under her breath. Gabby looked in both boxes and giggled.

"Just like the Merrily Men says….you gots alotta balls, Daddy!" She turned to Steph. "Mommy….we gots balls on our Christmist tree!" Then, Gabby squealed with delight.

"Just keep the balls on the tree, Sweet Pea," Steph sighed. Good thing Grandma Mazur didn't teach her any innuendo about the candy canes. Little Carlos was sound asleep so Steph went to put him down in his crib. She turned on the stereo and played Christmas music as they finished decorating the tree. It did have that Charlie Brown Christmas tree vibe, but it was still beautiful. Gabby was pleased so that was all that mattered. Stephanie set out the little snack table that was especially for Santa's cookies and treats for the reindeer. "Gabby? Go get the special plates and cup."

"Okay Mommy." She ran into the dining room to get them out of the bottom of the hutch. A few minutes later, Gabby put out the special plate for Santa's cookies, his special milk cup, and a special bowl for the reindeer treats. Then, she ran into the kitchen to get the cookies. Ella helped her make the special Santa cookies. 'Only Santa can eat these cookies,' she told anyone that would listen. Which was pretty much everyone because nobody ever ignored Gabby. Actually, Ranger was the lucky one who got to eat those cookies. He would eat the cookies, leave one with a bite taken from it, drink the milk, and eat the beef jerky and carrots sticks for the reindeer. After looking at all the presents under the tree, it was the next thing that Gabby would check. Eating that crap was worth the look on her face.

Ranger picked up Gabby then put his arm around Stephanie as they admired their tree. Gabby leaned over and whispered in his ear. "I don't think Santa's gonna know you breaked our tree, Daddy, so it's okay. I still love you." Ranger kissed her cheek.

"I love you too, Gabby." There was a knock at the door. Santos was on time for once. "I think you should get that." He let her down, and she flew to the door. Stephanie gave Ranger a confused look.

"Who is that?" Ranger pulled her close and kissed her. "You'll see." Gabby opened the door to find Santa/Santos.

"Santa! Oh em gee! Mommy….Daddy…it's Santa!" Gabby shouted with glee. She grabbed him by the hand and led him inside. Ram, Woody, and Hal were right behind him. Stephanie glanced over at Ranger and smiled.

"Ho Ho Ho!" Santos bellowed. "Have you been a good girl this year, Prin…uh…Gabby?" He sat on the couch and pulled Gabby on to his lap. Gabby's head bobbed up and down.

"Uh huh. I made you Christmist cookies, Santa," Gabby told him. Steph went and got the camera again. She took pictures of Gabby with Santa. "Where's your reindeers?"

"Oh..uh…I left them on the roof. They're not housebroken. I don't think your Dad would like reindeer ph…uh….tinkle all over the floor," Lester told her.

"Ewe! Daddy…the reindeers are tinkling on the roofs!" Gabby told him as she looked up at the ceiling.

Lester grabbed Steph's hand and pulled her onto his lap. "So what do you want little girl?" Again, Gabby covered her mouth and giggled.

"She's not a little girl, Santa, that's my Mommy!" she explained. Ranger took pictures of his 'girls' with Santa. Steph jumped up.

"Hold on a second," she told them. "Let me get the baby. I want a picture of him on Santa's lap." They took more pictures of Gabby and Little Carlos with Santa. Then, Ranger took more of Steph and the kids.

"Daddy…now you gots to sit on Santa's lap," Gabby commanded. Ranger almost gagged. Lester cleared his throat.

"That's okay Prin…uh..Gabby," Lester began, " Santa doesn't need a fat man on his lap. Ho..Ho…JESUS!!!!" Ranger had dropped himself onto Lester's lap hard.

"Are you prayin', Santa?" Gabby asked. Lester sucked in a deep breath and nodded.

"Uh…yeah….Jesus! It's okay because tomorrow is his birthday," Lester hoarsely replied. Gabby nodded.

"Happy Burseday, Jesus! Just don't take his veins a 'cause it's a sin. Right Mommy?" Stephanie bent over and kissed the top of her head.

"That's right, Sweet Pea." Ranger gave a none-so-gentle hop on Lester's lap before he got back on his feet. Lester took a minute to massage his thigh before speaking again.

"I just wanted to take a break and get some Christmist cookies before I got back on the road. I was blinded by the Rangeman building and thought this would be a good place to stop." Stephanie snickered but quickly covered her mouth when Ranger shot her a sideways glance. "But, I think these guys have something for you." He looked to the front door. Bobby drove in a motorized black Hummer. He could barely get his ass in open top, and he had to hold his legs out to the side. Ranger captured the moment with the camera. More memories to add to the Wall of Shame.

"Merry Christmist, Gabby," Bobby told her. Gabby's eyes were almost as wide as her opened mouth.

"Merry Christmist!" Ram, Woody, and Hal echoed. Gabby looked back and forth between Ranger and Steph. The black Hummer was adorned with Rangeman decals.

"Whoa!" she exclaimed. Bobby tried to get up but his ass was stuck in the seat. Ram and Hal each grabbed an arm and pulled him up. Once freed, Bobby patted the seat.

"Here you go, Gabby." Ram picked her up and set her in the Hummer. Bobby spent the next few minutes showing her the controls. It wasn't long before she was speeding around the apartment. Steph made sure she caught that 200 watt smile like her father's in pictures.

"That was so sweet of you guys!" Steph told them. "She loves it." Ram's phone rang. There was an alarm, and they had to leave. Woody handed the baby back to Steph then they each gave Gabby a quick kiss and hug before heading out the door.

"Thank you!" Gabby yelled after them. Lester helped himself to the cookies on the Santa plate and then sipped the milk. It tasted like shit. Damn Ranger and his skim milk! He looked over his shoulder and saw Ranger and Steph busy watching Gabby. He spit the milk back into the cup. He glanced at his watch. It was almost time for Kym to get off work. Time to go. He walked over to Steph and Ranger.

"It's time to get back to work. I don't want to be late for Mrs. Claus now," he joked. Steph gave him a hug.

"Thanks, Lester," she whispered. "This was a really great surprise." Lester hugged her tight.

"You're welcome, Beautiful. Anything for Gabby…you know that," he whispered back. He shook Ranger's hand. "Merry Christmist!" Gabby ran into his open arms.

"I almost forgots! Did you remember my baby brudder? He just came outta my Mommy's 'gina yesterday so he didn't have time to gived you his Christmist list!" Gabby's lower lip protruded. "I love Diego even though he gots a lumpy ball."

"Oh don't worry about that Prin…uh…Gabby. Santos knows everything. I mean…I'm Santa. I have a memory like an elephant. I got Lumpy Ball covered," Lester told her. Gabby looked over at Ranger and gasped.

"Daddy! Santa knows about Diego's lumpy ball! But, it's okay a 'cause Santa didn't forgets him." Gabby sounded relieved. Lester put her down.

"Well…I got to get these presents delivered. Remember Gabby…I can't come back until you fall asleep!" He headed for the door.

"Wait!" Gabby yelled and ran after him. Lester turned and knelt down. She threw her arms around him. "I love you, Uncle Lester." Lester stiffened.

"No Princess…um…I mean Gabby. I'm Santa." Gabby rolled her eyes.

"I knowed it's you, Uncle Lester. I smelled you. You smell like Calbin Clime." She hugged him again. This time, he squeezed her tight. "You always smell good, Uncle Lester." She pulled his beard down and smacked on his lips. "Merry Christmist…I love you." Lester kissed her back.

"I love you, too, Princess. Merry Christmist." He got up, rubbed the top of her head, then left.

"How did you know that was Uncle Lester?" Steph asked.

"I smelled his Calbin Clime. Just like Daddy smells like Booger Gary. Daddy smells good too," Gabby explained.

"Well," Steph began, "why don't you get ready for bed? It's been a long day, and we're all tired. And Santa won't come until you are asleep." Gabby ran to the kitchen to get more cookies to restock the plate. Then, she hopped in her Hummer and drove to her room. Ranger shook his head.

"Why do I get the feeling that a drum set would have been a better gift?" he joked.

Stephanie walked over to him with Little Carlos in her arms. Pointing up, she said, "I think that's mistletoe you're standing under." Then she kissed him. "Merry Christmas, Ranger." He glanced down at his son, then he kissed her back.

"Merry Christmas, Babe."

Stephanie went to feed Little Carlos while Ranger tucked Gabby in bed. She fell asleep before he finished reading her the Grinch That Stole Christmas. He kissed her forehead then turned out the light. He still had to get all the presents ready for the morning. Unlike her mother, Gabby was an early riser like him. He put out all the presents. Then, Ranger went to the kitchen to put on the tea kettle. He grabbed a cookie off Santa's plate. He was going to have to eat all that crap so he might as well get it over with. He ate the cookies and left one behind with the bite mark. He ate the carrot sticks next followed by the jerky. The jerky tasted a little weird, but he finished it anyway. Shit…the milk! He downed it in one gulped then gagged. Ugh…it was warm. Warm skim milk did not go great with beef jerky and carrots. But, it made Gabby happy. That was all the mattered.

Ranger had the tea ready by the time Steph finished feeding the baby, changing his diaper, and putting him in his crib. "What's this?" Ranger patted the seat next to him.

"I thought you could use it," he told her with his wolfish grin. She sat down and snuggled next to him. As she sipped her tea, they admired their Christmas tree.

"This has been a wonderful day," she said. "Did you ever think that we would wind up like this after that day we met in the diner?"

"I don't know if I ever expected this," Ranger replied, "but I'll tell you what, Babe. I fell in love with you that first day we met." She squeezed his hand.

"You still have to wait 6 weeks you know." Ranger groaned.

"I guess Santa Claus isn't cummin' this year," he sighed. "I hate to say this…but, my daughter was right about the blue balls."

"Out of the mouths of babes…."

TBC……..

Gabby just didn't want to stop talking so what was planned as a long one shot has now become a 4 part story. Still to come….Christmist Day!