A/N: Hello, my wonderful, lovely, patient, and all-around superfantabulous readers! I am so sorry that it's been so long (like, over two flippin' months!) since my last update. I am really, really, really sorry; the end of school was crazier than belief, and I literally was unable to sit and write until we went on vacation a couple of days ago. Also, I no longer have my laptop, so I have to compete for typing time on the home computer (cannot wait until I get my Mac, cannot wait until I get my Mac) So, to make it up to you, somewhat, at least, I give you a double feature! Enjoy and please review, even though I don't deserve it. Thank you for your sheer wonderfullness, and I love you all!

Disclaimer: I do not own Charmed. If I did there would be peace on earth.

Babysitting for Billie

Kitchen. Phoebe and Paige walk in the back door, laughing, followed by Piper and a very wet Leo.)

Piper: (looking at Leo's dripping clothes in anguish) Great. I just mopped the floor yesterday!

Leo: (takes a dishtowel from the counter, runs it over his hair) You know, you didn't have to turn the hose on the Turkleton's cat...

Piper (irritably) How was I supposed to know the nozzle was still on powerwash?

Leo: (innocently) By asking the man who powerwashed the garage yesterday. (He flicks the wet towel at Piper)

Piper: Leo!

Leo: (grinning) C'mon, Piper, you know you love me.

Piper: Love you? Yes. Like you? Not at the moment.

(Leo shakes his head and plants a kiss on Piper's cheek. She smacks him halfheartedly and tries not to smile)

(Phoebe's phone rings. She checks it, groans)

Phoebe: Work... (Plastering on a fake smile, she opens the phone) Hi Elise...yes... (Leaves for the dining room) well just because it isn't a family emergency per se doesn't mean it's not important... (Exits)

(Henry walks into the kitchen from the back, holding little Henry)

Henry: Bad news, Piper. The meat that the cat didn't take got powerwashed into the yard...along with all the chopped vegetables.

Piper: (head in hands) Arg!

Paige: Don't worry. We have some stuff in our freezer. (To Henry) Could you go get it, hon?

Henry: Sure. If you take care of Jr. here. (He hands the baby to Paige and bolts out the back door. Paige wrinkles her nose)

Paige: Whoa! (Holding Little Henry at arm's length) Your sisters never had diapers this bad. (She hurries out into the dining room)

Piper: (arms folded, sternly addresses Leo) You, mister, need to stop dripping water all over my clean floor.

Leo: Okay.

Piper: And the kids need to be outside on a day like today. Play baseball with them or something.

Leo: (rolls eyes) As you wish. (With that he pulls her in and holds her close. Piper starts to push him away, but she gives up and returns the kiss)

Piper: (when they pull apart) I'll get the kids while you change.

Leo: (fingers a strand of her hair) Sounds good.

Hand in hand, they walk out of the kitchen.)

Attic. The seven children are running around happily, playing a game of tag.)

Chris: (tackling Wyatt) You're it!

Wyatt: (conjures a ball or twinkling orbs) Oh yeah? (He throws the orbs at Grace, who disappears as the ball hits her)

Grace: (popping up from behind the couch) Ha! Only got astral me! Doesn't count!

Sammie: (teasingly) Oh Wyatt...

(Wyatt turns and throws another orb ball at Sammie. Livvie rushes over and grabs her hand. Concentrating, the two girls use their powers to reverse the ball, which hits Wyatt in the face.)

Wyatt: (grudgingly) Nice one.

The twins giggle and scamper off. Wyatt searches for his next victim, and throws and orb ball at Chris)

Warren: Chris! Lookout!

(Chris turns around and tk's the orb ball into a rafter)

Chris: Thanks War!

(Wyatt sends an orb ball at Warren, who shimmers out. Wyatt turns to Melinda throws one at her. Warren shimmers in behind her, grabs her hand, and levitates them both off the ground. The orb ball hits the wall.)

Wyatt: (throws arms up in air) Dang it!

(The twins, Grace and Chris stop running. Melinda and Warren float back down)

Grace: (gloating to Wyatt) You didn't get a single one of us!

Chris: That's 'cause Warren's the man! (He holds up his hand; Warren gives him a high five.)

Wyatt: (pouting) Let's play something else.

Warren: (excited) Can we play Harry Potter?

Halliwell Children: Yeah!

They're jumping up and down, trying to sort out who will play who when Piper opens the door.)

Piper: (amused) Hey guys, what's going on in here? (She sees Warren, blinks) Hello. (To the rest of the kids) Um, who's this?

(Warren shrinks back behind Melinda, who, after glancing at her cousins, grabs his arm and pulls him forward)

Melinda: (best smile) Auntie Piper, this is our new friend W—(catches herself) Philip. Philip...Philip Warren!

The kids nod in agreement. Warren steps forward shyly)

Warren: It's...it's very nice to meets you, Mrs. Piper. (He extends his little hand)

Piper: (eyebrows raised, takes it) Why thank you, Philip. It's very nice to meet you too. (To her children and nieces, carefully controlled voice) How did your little friend get here?

Chris: (jumps in eagerly) Mom, W—Philip is one of Aunt Billie's innocents. She's helping his dad fight a demon—

Piper: (eyes widen at the word demon) Christopher! (She throws up her hands as if to freeze Warren; nothing happens) What the...

Grace: its okay, Mommy. Philip knows about magic.

Livvie: Yeah, he can even do magic, Auntie Piper.

Wyatt: That's why you couldn't freeze him.

Piper: (surveys the stiff, super-smiley children) Uh huh. (She takes out her cell phone and starts to dial)

Sammie: Who are you calling, Auntie Piper?

Piper: I'm calling your Aunt Billie, Sammie. I have a couple of questions for her. (She turns from the kids and walks a few feet away.)

The children huddle nervously)

Wyatt: (whispers) Crap! We're in trouble. I didn't think she'd actually call Billie!

Melinda: What are we going to do?

Chris: I don't know, maybe—

Piper: Billie? This is Piper.

The kids turn and watch Piper anxiously)

Piper: Billie, why did—

(Split screen between the attic/Piper and an alleyway; Billie is crouching behind a dumpster, holding potion bottles and her phone)

Billie: (hurried whisper) Is this a matter of life or death?

Piper: (glances over at Warren) Not exactly—

Billie: Okay, then I really can't talk to you right now—

Piper: (a bit annoyed) Oh yes you can—

Billie: No, really, I've been tracking this demon for weeks and if my cover's blown I'll have to start from scratch!

Piper: (really annoyed) So what if you've been tracking the demon for weeks? (Brief shot to the kids, who all breathe a sigh of relief) I need to know why you—

Billie: Look, Piper, I'm really sorry, but I have to go. I'll call you in a couple hours. (She shuts her phone)

Full screen on Piper, mouth open in surprise when the phone clicks off. Clearly ticked, she shuts her own phone, puts it in her pocket, and turns to the kids)

Piper: Was Billie kind enough to say how long Philip will be staying with us?

The kids grin)

Melinda: Probably until after dinner. Can Philip eat with us?

Piper: Of course, honey. We're not going to let our guest starve.

Warren: (beaming) Thank you Mrs. Piper! Melinda and everybody was tellings me you make the bestest dinners!

Piper: (flattered) Well, I am a chef...

(Paige enters the attic carrying the baby)

Paige: Hey Piper, Henry's back with the food, and (sees Warren) Who's that?

Piper: This is Philip, Billie's new innocent. (Sarcastic) We're babysitting.

Camera to Warren and Melinda)

Warren: (whispers) Is that your mommy?

Melinda: (whispers) No, that's my Auntie Paige, Sammie and Livvie's mommy.

Camera to Paige and Piper)

Paige: We're babysitting for Billie? Since when?!

Piper: Since now, apparently. She's helping his father catch a demon so she dropped him off. Here. Without telling us. (To the kids) If Billie ever does something like this again, come and tell one of us right away, okay?

Kids: Okay.

Paige: (lowers voice) That little witch is in trouble...

Piper: (fake laugh) You have no idea. (To kids, smiling) Well, come on everybody. Let's go outside and play.

The kids dart out of the attic, save for Melinda and Warren, who stop by Paige.)

Warren: (offers Paige his hand) It is very nice to meet you, Mrs. Paige.

Paige: (takes his hand) It's nice to meet you to, Philip...

Piper: Warren. Philip Warren.

Paige: Really?

(Warren and Melinda rush out of the attic after the other kids. Paige turns to Piper)

Paige: Philip Warren? A P name and Warren? Do you think he's a cousin or something?

Piper: It's entirely possible. He didn't freeze.

Paige: Maybe Billie had a good reason for bringing him here, then.

Piper: Maybe. But she's still gonna get it.

(They leave the attic)

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I know! I promised that I'd have Phoebe and Warren meet in this installment! It's there in the next scene!