Hello, my wonderful readers! I can't talk for long tonight, it's waaaay too late and I want to go to bed so I can get my copy of the new HP book tomorrow!
ElenaMarshal: 'Fair lovely and wonderful writer...' Really, I think that I'm the one being spoiled by these positively glowing reviews! I'll keep trying to deserve them! Thanks so much and take care:-)
Disclaimer: I do not own Charmed...I would cry but I am too sleepy.
A/N: I love you all!
(The kitchen. Phoebe is storming around, haphazardly putting things away, with Paige looking on helplessly)
Paige: Phoebe, sweetie, you just put the chicken in the dishwasher—
Phoebe: (fuming) The nerve. Can you believe the nerve of him?! "Oh! I'm not dead! Oh! I have a son! Oh, I'm not evil!" Yeah. We've never heard that one before. Oh, and how the hell does he know my daughter's name?!
Paige: Okay honey, the spaghetti goes in the fridge, not the herb cabinet—
Phoebe: Like we're actually going to just let him go raise an innocent child! Has he lost his freaking mind?! I don't know what Piper's thinking. She's worked at the club a lot lately. Do you think she's been kicking back a few? I mean, that's the only explanation I can think of for just—
Paige: Phoebe! Silverware does not go in the garbage disposal!
Phoebe: I think an intervention is in order. Wyatt and Chris and Grace can't have an alcoholic for a mother, and—
(Paige spots a glass of milk on the counter, grabs it, and throws it on Phoebe.)
Phoebe: Ack! What was that for?
Paige: You, missy, are being completely crazy. (Phoebe starts to protest) Uh uh. You listen to me. Yes, this situation is very weird. Yes, it is entirely possible that multiple people in this house have gone insane. But giving in to hysterical fits and breaking the garbage disposal will not help matters! (stops for breath, continues more gently) Look, Phoebe, we're going to figure this all out.
Phoebe: (almost numb) You got milk all over my clothes.
Paige: Then go upstairs and get some dry clothes. (Little Henry starts to cry) I've got to go take care of the baby.
Phoebe: What about the kitchen?
Paige: "Let the object of objection become but a dream as I cause the seen to be unseen." (the spell works and leaves the kitchen sparking)
Phoebe: (dully) What about personal gain?
Paige: Special demon daddy back from the dead exception. (she grabs Phoebe's wrist, leads her out of the kitchen to the stairs) Now go raid Piper's closet and pull yourself together.
(Mute, Phoebe obeys. Paige goes to the conservatory, picks up little Henry from his playpen)
Paige: Hey pumpkin, it's okay...
Warren: (curiously) Why's he crying?
(Paige turns around to see Warren looking up at her)
Paige: Well, since he doesn't know how to talk yet, he cries to let us know when he needs something. (wrinkles her nose) Right now, what he needs is a diaper change. (she grabs the diaper bag next to the playpen and starts to set up) Why aren't you with the other kids getting ready for the slumber party?
Warren: Daddy and Aunt Piper aren't back with my jammies yet, so Mr. Leo said I could come upstairs and get a cookie. Then I heard crying so I came in here.
Paige: Aunt Piper?
Warren: She said that she thinks I'm a pretty awesome kid, so I should call her Aunt Piper.
Paige: Okaay...well Philip, since you're not doing anything would you like to help me wrangle this little guy? (she nods at little Henry, who's trying to do acrobatics in her arms)
Warren: Yeah! (he goes and sits by Paige and plays with the baby, distracting him while Paige works) Does this mean I'm your special helper now?
Paige: Sure, I guess.
Warren: I like being a helper. I'm Daddy's special helper, too. I help Daddy make pancakes and pick up stuff at the house...sometimes he even lets me vacuum! But sometimes I knock stuff over when I vacuum, so he mostly does it by hisself.
Paige: (snort) Cole Turner, vacuum? Where are the flying pigs?
Warren: (genuinely surprised) Pigs can fly?
Paige: No, they can't. Sorry, I was just talking to myself. (she finishes changing baby Henry, and zips the diaper bag closed, catching her finger as she does so) Shit. That hurt— (she sees Warren, his little mouth open in shock) Umm, I mean—
Warren: Uh oh. You said a bad word.
Paige: I know. Sorry about that. I didn't mean to, but the zipper caught my finger; it's even bleeding a little.
Warren: Daddy doesn't let me say bad words. But once, I had a bad dream, and when I told Daddy about it he said the same word you did, but he didn't even apologize!
Paige: Wow. That must have been some dream.
Warren: Yeah. I was swimming, and it was all dark and warm and squishy and I couldn't see anything, and these two ladies were shoutings and there was all these weird noises and somebody grabbed me and and one lady said "What did you do to my baby?" and then another lady said bunches of really weird words and then I 'sploded!
Paige: (doesn't know what to say) Um, Philip—
Warren: And then I had a better dream with lots of white and sparkles and a nice lady called Kangaroo picked me up and gave me to Daddy and told him not to name me Warren but he did anyway and—(at the look on Paige's face) I'm sorry! Did I say something wrong?
Paige: No...(she scoops up little Henry and sets him down in the playpen before going to Warren and taking his hands in hers) Did you just say that your name is Warren?
Warren: (frustrated at self) I'm still not supposed to say, but it's like I told Aunt Piper. Warren's my middle name and daddy calls me Warren like you guys call Grace Grace but only at home everyplace else he calls me Philip and I'm 'sposed to tell everybody that's what my name is but—
Paige: (eyes wide) Wow, you talk...a lot. (she crouches in front of him) Warren—do you want me to call you that now? (he nods) Okay. Warren, since you were such a great little helper with baby Henry, I think we should play a special game of hide and seek.
Warren: Yay!
Paige: Now this is a very very special game of hide and seek. (whispers) It uses magic.
Warren: Cool!
Paige: It's very cool! Here's how it works. You shimmer—can you shimmer? Good. You shimmer someplace in the manor, an I'll find you using magic, okay?
Warren: Okay! (he shimmers out)
(Paige stands up and squeezes the finger cut by the zipper)
Paige: (takes a deep breath) For Phoebe's son:
Blood of my blood,
I summon thee
Blood of my blood,
Return to me.
(a drop of her blood falls from her finger to the floor. A gray cloud swirls in front of Paige, and clears, leaving Warren standing in front of her)
Warren: (eager) Did it work? Did it work?
Paige: (struggling to keep a happy-go-lucky face) Yes. It worked perfectly. Good job! (Warren gives her a hug. She holds him tightly) Hey Warren?
Warren: Yes Mrs. Paige?
Paige: I think that Piper was right. You are an awesome kid. So will you call me Aunt Paige?
Warren: (pulls away and claps) Sure! Yesterday, I only had a daddy and today, I have two aunts! (serious, but excited) Do you think this means that I'll get a real mommy too?
(Phoebe walks down the stairs, stops, runs back up. Paige watches her)
Paige: Anything's possible, War. (Warren smiles and goes to the playpen to look at baby Henry. To herself) Anything is possible.
Sorry that's all I can put up tonight! The next scene is very actiony, I promise! Thanks for reading and please R&R!