Summary: Laura was just your average woman, until a freak accident involving her television set, the Advent Children dvd, and a lightning strike transported her to Gaia. And that's only the beginning of the story!

Disclaimer: Nope, still don't own FFVII or Advent Children. Just a single copy of the movie. Now put the pitchforks and torches away.

Queen's Quornor: I have got to, got to thank people for reading this. Honestly, I wasn't so sure this fic would be read at all, considering how many world-swap fics we currently have floating around, but I have been pleasantly surprised. I'm only on chapter 8, and already it's gotten more hits than most of my other fics! To those of you still reading this Mary Sue-nonsense, you have my deepest gratitude. Double thanks, cookies, and your choice of SHM plushie to those of you leaving me reviews! Now that that's out of my system, onto commenting on the chapter at hand. Yes, I am working my way up to a lemon in either the next chapter or the one after it. The way I justify this, before any of you start ganging up on me and firing the flamethrowers, is that Laura is willing to do whatever it takes to keep Kadaj as Kadaj, rather than Jenova's Kadaj. If that means sleeping with him so he'll attach his heart and mind to her instead of Jenova, then she'll do it. And it seems to be working. Thus far, anyway…(laughs evilly). But what I'm wondering is, can she keep her heart out of this? Ah, the eternal issue of the Mary Sue! To love or not to love, that is the question! Or if we're going to be more graphic, I guess the question would be 'to screw or not to screw'... I guess you'll just have to wait and see, because at this point the fic is still at the mercy of the muses, and they are fickle creatures indeed…

He's not The One, but…

After a frantic sniff-test, Laura finally decided upon a pair of jeans and a black spaghetti-strap top as her clothing for the day. Due to a certain lack of time, she decided to simply tie her hair back and run a brush through it when she got back. As soon as she was presentable and her dirty clothes were thrown at a surprised Loz, she raced outside.

Kadaj was impatiently waiting for her by his motorcycle, dressed in a one-sleeved variation of his Advent Children leather bodysuit. To Laura's amusement, the outfit looked a lot like a leather version of Cloud's sweater and pants. But the sleeve was covering his right arm instead of the left (all the better to hide that tattoo), and the zipper was open halfway down his chest, not zipped up to the neck. And of course, the wolf's head was missing. But there was a black leather headband tied on just under his bangs, similar to the one Vincent always wore, but a lot thinner. Oddly, the outfit looked better on Kadaj than it did on Cloud. As soon as he saw her, he mounted the bike.

"Get on behind me, but be careful not to touch the pipes," he instructed. After a moment Laura slid on behind him and linked her arms around his waist, suddenly grateful that he had a motorcycle and not a car. What red-blooded, straight woman wouldn't prefer holding onto someone this sexy rather than merely sitting next to him? Damn, the movie actually toned down how hot he really is! As soon as she was settled, he revved up the engine and took off into the forest.

God help me, but I thought Loz was a fast driver!

Kadaj was not only a speed demon, he was also a reckless driver. More than once, Laura truly through they were going to be killed by a head-on collision of some kind, only to find that they were still alive and in one piece an eye-blink later. She was not adverse to high speeds, really, but she definitely didn't like the chances Kadaj routinely took while going at triple digit speeds. She trusted him, but the odds of a crash occurring terrified her.

To stop herself from panicking every time a tree or log loomed up before them, Laura buried her face against Kadaj's back, screwing her eyes tightly shut so there was no chance of witnessing any fast-approaching death. Please God please, don't let us crash! Please God please, don't let us crash! Please God please…

After what seemed like an eternity, Laura felt the wind decrease a bit and dared to raise her head. Kadaj had slowed the bike down to what was relatively a crawl, but was probably more like thirty or forty miles per hour, following a trail alongside a small stream. In the distance, she could hear waves crashing against a shore.

"You okay back there?" Kadaj asked, casting her a quick glance over his shoulder. It was with some irritation that she noticed the amused twinkle in his eye.

I'm practically dying back here, and he finds this humorous? What an asshole! Correction: sexy asshole, but an asshole nonetheless!

"You're too reckless," she gritted out. "Take way too many chances."

"We're still alive and nearly at the dock, aren't we? Don't worry; you can stretch your legs out once we get on the boat. In the meantime, could you loosen your grip a little, please? You're squeezing my intestines up into my lungs."

"Sorry," she mumbled, unwinding her fingers from the death-knot they had formed in front of his stomach and reclasping them less tightly. "Anything else?"

He was silent for a moment, then "You can put your head back down, if you want."

The trail was clear, no reason to duck down. He just wants to feel like a strong, powerful man. Easy to accomplish; he is one, after all. "Sure. Thank you." Closing her eyes, Laura leaned her head against his back, this time resting her cheek against the leather rather than her entire face. It was really relaxing to be in this position, she discovered. Her usual need for blasting music on the road melted away, replaced by her contentment in listening to the sound of his breathing, the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. Strange how I'm more comfortable with him than I ever was with any of my ex-boyfriends, when he's ten times more likely to kill me than they were.

All too soon, she heard Kadaj call out to someone, his voice reverberating through his back directly into her ear. "Hey, Cap'n Stu! Got room for two more?"

"'Course I do, Jadak! You know there's always room for you and your brothers!" an oddly Cid-like voice yelled back. There was a scraping sound, then Laura felt them going up an incline. As soon as they leveled out and the bike came to a complete stop, she lifted her head and looked around. 'Jadak,' eh? How original of you, Kadaj. What do Loz and Yazoo go by, I wonder? Zol and Oozay?

They were on a ship. A basic, run-of-the-mill ocean freighter. A small one, but a freighter nonetheless. Laura didn't see too many people running around, but she assumed that the ones she did see were probably archeologists from Bone Village. They certainly looked the part. As Kadaj switched off the bike and slid off, Laura noticed a tall man with a short blond beard and a captain's hat, smoking pipe clamped tightly between his teeth, approaching them. "You've got a young lady with you this time, I see," he drawled around the pipe. "Fuckin' hell, Jadak. You sure can pick 'em."

Kadaj grinned and put his arm around Laura's shoulders. "Tell me something I don't know, Stu. Laura is special. She's not like any of the others."

Laura felt her heart sink. Others?

"Well, don't go rockin' the fuckin' boat again this time. Last time you had a lady onboard, you nearly capsized the damned boat!" He sounded stern, but Laura did notice a certain fatherly fondness in his gruff voice.

"I'll keep that in mind, Captain." Kadaj took her hand and began leading her away. "Do we have to pay fare this time?"

"You know I won't take gil from kids like you!" the captain roared, striding away to the bridge. "You need that fuckin' gil more than I do!"

Laura's head was spinning. Kadaj had brought other women to the City before? Had sex with them? How many? How good was it?

What happened to those other women? What will happen to me

"What's wrong?"

She realized with a start that they were now in the shaded area beside the bridge, beside the rail. Kadaj was standing behind her, his arms around her waist and resting his chin on her shoulder. Laura sighed and relaxed back against him slightly. Not too much, Laura; he is a little shorter than you, remember?

"You never mentioned there were other girls."

"And you haven't had other guys?"

"Dates, yes. Sex, no. It just worries me; what happened to those other women?"

"Still a virgin, eh? That's easily remedied."

"I was waiting for the right guy." But I suspect it'll end up going to you. "Just answer the question."

They swayed for a moment as the ship shuddered, then steadied when it began moving. "All of those women are back on the mainland. I wouldn't know what happened to them; I only knew them as long as I was in Junon or on the boat. Once we docked at Bone Village Harbor, we always parted ways."

Hookers. All of them were hookers.

This realization, absurdly, caused a wave of relief to wash over her. Yazoo hadn't been mistaken when he said there hadn't been anybody since Kyrie; those other women had all been with him merely so he could satisfy his itch. They hadn't been his girlfriends!

"So you're not a virgin after all," she mused happily. "I always wondered about that, ever since I first saw Advent Children."

He chuckled, low enough that the sound vibrated up her spine and made her shiver. "Do you make a habit of trying to figure out the sexual status of your favorite movie characters?"

She turned in his arms, head already bending to his. "Only the ones I like."

This kiss was slower, more sensual and loving than the others. There was no rush, no fierce, desperate hunger. Just a slow fire building leisurely, a savoring of what they both had to offer the other. Kadaj held her like a treasure, something to cherish and never let go. Laura savored it, wallowed in it.

He made her feel…

Special.

When the kiss was ended, the embrace continued, their arms loosely wrapped around each other. It was practically a given, in Laura's mind, that they would eventually become intimate. Kadaj's actions practically screamed that he wanted her, and she'd be a liar to say that she didn't feel the same about him.

And he hates liars, after all…

Besides, allowing him to lose himself in her body would be another anchor. Jenova couldn't touch her, so if he had her to hold onto in a way the Calamity couldn't duplicate, it would be that much harder for her to drive him out of his mind.

"When?" she asked, leaving so much unsaid.

"First night in Junon." He understood, as she knew he would. "Tomorrow night."

I get my cherry popped tomorrow night.

I don't know if Kadaj is The One…

But I do know I can give myself to him, so he can keep himself.

"How good are you?" Oh shit! Did I really just say that?

One gloved hand stroked soothingly up and down her back. "Don't worry about it, Laura. I promise, you'll be screaming before we're through."

That good or that bad? Pay along, Laura. He might really be that good. She grinned, even through Kadaj couldn't see it. "I'll be holding you to that."

"I know you will."

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Laura sat up in the bunk, arms wrapped around her thighs and chin resting atop her knees. Kadaj was asleep in the bunk below her, peacefully this time; she hadn't heard a single sound from that general direction for a long while now. Her thoughts were elsewhere, anyway.

How long have I been here, in Earth's time? How long has it been since I got back from the Adirondacks and Mr. Harris put me on suspension? Do Earth and Gaia run on the same time or is there a difference? She smiled wryly. A question even the aged sages cannot answer. I'm the only person I know who has ever been sucked into a DVD!

Well, here's another one for the Experts: how the hell am I supposed to get home? Am I stuck here, or am I only here for a set time? Will I ever see Earth again?

Her mind wandered over the people she knew back home, the various acquaintances, exes-but-still-friends, and Denise. She remembered them with the same quality she always did; there was no fuzziness or difficulty as one might expect in sci-fi and fantasy movies. Brian and Denise are really the only people who would miss me if I didn't come back. They're the only ones I could possibly consider friends. Not even my own mother would give a damn if she never saw me again.

That truth, as ever, hurt. But she roughly shoved the tears away and told herself it was nothing, her mother had never cared about her and it just didn't matter. It was the same mantra she had recited to herself for years upon years, for as long as she could remember.

Her thoughts circled to her new companions, the SHM. In only a day, Kadaj knew more about her than even Denise, she had had a deeper heart-to-heart with Yazoo than the ones she had shared with Brian, and she had laughed harder with all three of them than she ever had with Joseph. There was no denying it; they had wormed their way into her heart and made themselves comfortable. The movie had them so linear, but in truth they were complex men, each with their own thoughts and feelings, not all of which had anything to do with 'Mother.' In fact, they were so much like her and the group she had once called 'friends' that it was frightening. Pain, sorrow, loss, fear, survival… Those were words they knew as intimately as she.

Would it really be so awful to stay here? If I can keep Jenova from sinking her claws into them, that is…

Gaia is not your home, Laura. You really don't belong here.

But I could make it my home. Isn't it true that we control, we make, our own destinies? That home is where the heart is?

And my heart is right here, with them.

Because they need me.

But what if you can't? What if you fail to prevent their madness and deaths?

I won't!

I failed to stop someone's death before. That isn't going to happen again.

I swear… I won't stand by and watch someone I care about die again.

"Do you hear me, Jenova?" she whispered fiercely. "They won't die for you. I won't let you use them and throw them away for Sephiroth's resurrection. I'll fight you to my last breath, if that's what it takes to keep them from you. You won't touch them, as long as I live! Not Loz. Not Yazoo.

"And definitely not Kadaj.

"I won't let you kill them, you alien bitch. Do you understand me? You can't have them!"

There was a soft rustling from below, then Kadaj's voice. "Laura? 'Zat you?"

Panic flooded her mind. He didn't hear me, did he? "It's nothing, Kadaj. Go back to sleep."

"Can I sleep with you?"

Are we talking 'sleeping' or 'sleeping together?' "If you want to. But no sex until tomorrow night, right?"

"No sex 'till t'morrow. Yeah." Almost effortlessly, he swung himself up into her bunk and stretched out beside her. Laura couldn't help but smile when she saw that he was more than half-asleep on his feet. He really was kind of sweet when he was conked out. She lay down and pulled the blanket over their bodies, tucking it securely around his back, and then smoothed the hair away from his sleeping face and put one arm around him. As soon as she was comfortable, Laura relaxed and let sleep come to her.