I made it in time for Sasori's birthday! xD Anyways, Pain's hair is now orange and Konan's eyes are now silver (I don't know why I didn't change these earlier). This chapter's not as long as I would've like, but…
Starts off after school, but last scene is during the weekend.
Previous:
"What, you want me to explain in detail why I have feelings for him and promise you that I'll stay by his side and whatnot?"
"…No."
"Then what's with the look?"
"…"
Shrugging, Deidara stood up. "I'm leaving, un." He walked across the room with no explanation other than that, and began opening the door.
"I don't like your new attitude."
Itachi's statement halted Deidara for a few moments, but he said nothing in reply and merely opened the door so he could get out, and closed it behind him as he left.
"…So?"
"Kisame and I worked together fine."
"…I've gained a small amount of respect for it. But I still refuse to work with it again."
"No. Not again, un."
Pain rubbed his forehead. Not only Sasori, but Deidara now too? Konan was giving him a look, and he sighed before giving in. "Fine. Sasori can work with Deidara, and Hidan with Kakuzu. Happy now?"
"Very." Sasori smirked.
"Of course you are, Sasori."
"You should've done this from the start, Pain!"
"Wha–" The orange-haired boy blinked at hearing such an informal remark from Deidara, but quickly brushed his surprise aside and looked pointedly at Sasori.
Sasori noticed immediately and scowled. "No."
"Fine," Pain muttered. "You're dismissed anyways. Go."
Deidara nodded at once and started to leave. Sasori tried to follow after him, but Itachi caught him by the wrist and gave him a look saying that he wanted to talk. And as Sasori saw Konan start to follow after Deidara, he nodded and followed after Itachi, past an arguing Hidan and Kakuzu.
"…What is it?" he asked when they were far enough away from Pain and the others.
"Do you trust him?"
"'Him?'" Sasori blinked. "You mean…Deidara?" At Itachi's silence, he nodded slowly. "…Yeah."
"Why?"
"Why…?"
"After everything he's done to you."
"…Deidara's…only helped me…"
"Both you and I know that's a lie, Sasori."
"If you're referring to when we fought, I…he was trying to protect her, and I egged him into the fight…and afterwards, he was concerned about me…"
Itachi remained silent, as if telling him to continue.
"…No one…ever cared for me after I told them off, or hit them or anything…" Sasori's eyes looked distant. "But Deidara…has done so much for me…"
"Sasori…"
Hearing Itachi's voice, Sasori looked over at him, turning as the Uchiha walked up to him. When he was close enough, Sasori coiled his arms around Itachi's neck, standing on tiptoes to lightly press his lips to the other's.
Without a sound, Itachi raised one hand to Sasori's red locks, lacing his fingers through them. Sasori, in return, tightened his hold on Itachi's neck, and attempted to stand just a bit higher. He savored the moment, the feeling of Itachi's warmth, Itachi's arms that held him so firmly yet gently at the same time and–
As he opened his eyes just slightly, the lockers that stood tall behind Itachi caught his eye, and he blanked, the memories of the event with Deidara cutting through his mind.
It didn't take long for Itachi to notice, and he broke the kiss at once, retracting his arms from around Sasori.
"I'm…sorry…Itachi…" Sasori backed up, lifting a hand and threading his fingers through his bangs, pushing them back from his eyes.
"…What's wrong?"
"I…love him…"
}}––––––»»
"He…He what?!"
Deidara sighed.
"He raced me to school once," he said again, over Konan's laughter. "He was the one who proposed it, un."
"You can't be serious! Sasori…racing?!" Konan broke into another fit of laughter.
"Un…"
"So who won?"
"…" Deidara looked away before answering in a small voice, "…He did."
"Oh?" Konan smirked.
"Yeah, yeah, he's faster," Deidara grumbled, walking away.
"Hey, wait up, Deidara!"
"Tell me what you really followed me for." Deidara shot her a mistrusting look. "I know you didn't come just to ask me about what danna does with me when he's bored." He paused. "'…With me when he's bored–'"
Konan laughed more at the look Deidara gave her.
"Not…funny…" Deidara turned back around so the girl couldn't see his reddened face. "Why are you making all these situations with danna and me anyways?"
"Mm…" Konan thought for a moment. "It's fun."
The blond bit back a retort for that before asking again, "Why'd you follow me?" When no answer came, he looked back at her. A surprised look took over his expression as he saw that a serious one had taken over hers.
"…Pain wants to know what's going on between you and Sasori."
"Wha…"
"From you. Not Sasori."
"…Why?"
"Sasori wouldn't give a straight answer. You should know that."
"Yeah, but–"
"What Pain and I want to know," Konan interrupted, "is why you still pursue him. Why didn't you stop when you found that he was with Itachi?"
"Why are you so sure I'll give you a straight answer, un?"
"Just answer the question."
Deidara felt a chill go down his spine, and after a moment he replied, "He lets me."
"What do you mean?"
"He lets me hold him. He lets me get close to him. He gives me looks that tell me not to go. Do I need more than that, un?"
"You do know that…Sasori isn't at all knowledgeable in romance, right?"
"…"
"He doesn't know how to deal with certain things."
"That's not my fault."
"I'm not saying it is, but how are you so sure that he has feelings for you?"
"I don't remember saying that."
"You implied it."
"…The way he looks at me."
Konan nodded. "Go on."
"…There's nothing else to say."
There was nothing but silence for several moments, before Konan broke it with a sigh. "…Honestly, I think he has feelings for you too."
"Why did you need to question me about it then, un?"
"I wanted to know your thoughts on it."
The blue-eyed boy blinked, then laughed. "I've never seen you so serious before!"
"I am when I have to be…especially if Pain has given me an order." Konan smiled.
"What are you, 'God's Angel?'" Deidara smirked.
"Mm, you might say that." Konan looked content at the nickname. "Anyways…I don't think you should've pursued him, but…Sasori…I guess you really couldn't have helped it, if he was letting you…did he do anything to you?"
"…He…kissed me, un…"
"…?" Konan blinked. "You mean that one in the cafeteria that Hidan forced?"
Deidara shook his head. "Of his own will."
}}––––––»»
"…Right here." Sasori looked back at Itachi. "I…kissed him…right here."
"…Why?"
"Well…"
Itachi narrowed his eyes.
"I…you always calm me down and make me feel better by kissing me and holding me, and…Pain had made me treat him horribly, and I wanted to tell him I still cared for him like a friend…" Sasori averted eye contact. "…I didn't know what else to do…"
"You couldn't have just told him?"
"Pain told me I couldn't, and if he found out that I did he wouldn't let him into Akatsuki…" Sasori bit his lower lip briefly. "…I told him the next day, though, but I needed him to know that I didn't hate him, because…because I didn't want to lose him, too…"
"I don't understand why you're so fond of him."
Sasori merely shrugged and didn't answer.
"…I can't keep you from him." Itachi closed his eyes as Sasori looked at him in slight surprise. "Even if I don't trust him…you seem to." He reopened his eyes. "But if he betrays you once, I'll–"
"He won't."
"…" The Uchiha nodded after a couple moments. "I'll take your word for it."
A small hint of relief washed over Sasori's face. He nodded back before turning to continue down the hallway.
"…He said you wanted to become something that couldn't feel."
And he stopped.
"Is that true?"
No answer. Itachi walked up to him, already aware of the answer. Frowning just a bit more, he gently grasped Sasori's shoulder and turned him around. "Why?"
"Because."
"That's not an answer."
Silence.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"You wouldn't understand."
"Yet Deidara would?"
"He wouldn't. It just…slipped out…"
"Twice."
"…Yes."
"…Don't lie, Sasori."
"I'm not. It slipped out…"
A look of skepticism flashed across Itachi's eyes.
The redhead bristled. "You know how I feel about lying, Itachi."
Itachi nodded.
"I may lie sometimes, but…I try not to…sometimes I don't know what else to do, and…" Sasori willed himself to calm down, lowering his voice into a low, quiet tone. "…But that's only because I'm human."
Human. The word was spat out like it burned Sasori's tongue to say it. Itachi released his shoulder.
"Tell me," he said, "what you're going to do in order to 'not feel.'"
"I won't let them get to me. They're…going to use my parents against me, so…" Sasori broke off there, glaring ever so lightly.
"You're going to close yourself up."
Sasori looked away.
"Deidara won't let you."
"…"
"I won't let you."
"You can't stop me."
Dark eyes flashed red. Instantly, Itachi had grasped Sasori's chin, musty scarlet eyes boring into surprised silver ones.
"I…" The shorter boy's mouth opened as he attempted to say the other's name, but ultimately closed, unable to form the right syllables.
"…Don't say that to me ever again," Itachi breathed, his warm breath hitting Sasori's lips. Sasori flinched back slightly, breaking free from Itachi's grip. He scowled faintly as he fixed the Uchiha with a hard stare.
"You're a fool, to think that doing this will help you."
"Then so be it."
"You don't have to be a fool to overcome this, Sasori."
"I don't have to be a fool to do a lot of things. Maybe it's time I should be foolish for something."
"Not for this."
"…Nn…"
"…Would Deidara still…care…for you, even after you'd sealed away all your feelings?"
"…!" The redhead's eyes widened for a second, before he looked away and bit his lower lip a little.
"Well?"
"…Deidara…" He turned back to Itachi, a ghost of a smile staining his lips. "…Deidara was in love with a mask anyways…he can't…"
"What are you saying?"
An expression of something like guilt crossed Sasori's face.
"Just a while ago you were telling me you wanted to be with him. And now you're saying that it'd be alright if he left you." Anger singed Itachi's voice.
"I…" Sasori clutched at his forehead. "I don't know…what to do…!"
"Sasori…"
"All I've been doing is running away…I hate it…"
"Then don't close yourself up. Don't run…anymore…"
Silence fell over the two for several moments, and Sasori gazed blankly at the ground, as if thinking and questioning himself. He closed his eyes and let his arms fall back down to his sides.
"…I'm sorry, Itachi…" A bitter smile curved his lips; his eyes reopened slightly to stare wistfully at the floor. "…I don't think I can stop myself…"
}}––––––»»
"He doesn't want to feel anymore."
"What…?" Konan's eyes widened.
"He wants to become something…that can't feel."
"Why? Why would he…?"
"…He doesn't want to be hurt anymore. Since Orochimaru's group is using his parents against him, he feels that…the only thing feeling does for him is give him more pain…un…"
"His parents…" Konan stiffened in realization. "Then you–!"
"Being fair won't get me anywhere…I've learned that here." Deidara averted her eyes.
"That's not true, Deidara-kun!"
"…At the very least, I can't protect him, if I'm being fair…and if I can't even do that, then…I'm better off not being able to do anything."
"That's ridiculous, you shouldn't be thinking things like that," Konan snapped.
"Fine, that was a bit exaggerated." Deidara frowned. "I just…can't stand it when Orochimaru takes advantage of him…"
"I know. I can't either."
"It's already going to be hard enough to help him…and then they…" Deidara scowled at the ground. "…But I'm still gonna try."
"…What are you planning to do?"
"I'm going to stop him."
"How?"
"He can't be emotionless if I keep angering him." Deidara smirked. "I know what buttons to press…un."
"He won't hate you?"
Deidara shook his head. "He would've hated me now, if that were to happen."
Konan said nothing for a moment. "Will doing that…really help him?"
"It will."
"What if it doesn't?"
"It will."
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because I won't let it fail."
"…You know that high school relationships don't usually…last, right?"
"So?"
"You don't even know if you're going to stay with him–"
"Then I'll make it work until it falls apart."
The girl sighed. "I don't…understand you…"
"Danna says the same thing."
"It's odd, since you're so open, and…straightforward, that people would assume that you'd be so easy to…"
"…"
"You're so devoted to him…" Konan reached out to rest a hand on his shoulder, before adding on more jokingly, "Is this how you are for every person you care for? I might fall for you now if so."
"Don't let Pain hear you say that."
"Wha–" Konan reddened. "Like he'd care!"
"He got mad before when you showed your tattoo, un."
"That's because…" Konan fumbled with her words, and withdrew her arm before saying, "Let's just go back to you and Sasori!"
"What else could you possibly want to know?"
"Well…your new attitude. I've never seen you so…snappy at Pain before."
"Maybe this is how I've always been, and what you saw of me before was the fake."
"Maybe. I won't know unless you tell me, you know."
Deidara shrugged. "I'll let you figure it out on your own."
"Thanks." Konan rolled her eyes. "So…"
"Nn?"
"Is there anything you dislike about Sasori?"
"…He's stubborn, likes doing things alone, and won't let me in."
Konan blinked.
"…He's in the darkness, and he won't let me in."
"Oh…"
"I'm not going to just leave him there." Deidara sighed, a slightly embarrassed look appearing over his features. "I'm going to pull him out, un."
"Pull him out of…the darkness…?" Konan gave him a strange look. "You say that like it's an easy thing…"
"As long as I anger him here and there he won't get consumed, will he?"
"Yes, but…"
"If I can't pull him out that easily, then I'll take his place. I'll endure the darkness, and let him be in the light."
"Wha–"
"I'd be fine with that."
"…You really think that Sasori would be happy with letting you suffer in his stead…?"
"…Then I'll pull him back down and we'll suffer together."
"…!" Konan looked at him in shock.
"And if that doesn't work either…" Deidara didn't look her in the eye. "Then I'll shatter the darkness and make it the light."
"Deidara-kun, wha…just how far are you going to go for him…?"
And without missing a beat, Deidara replied,
"Too far."
}}––––––»»
Sasori walked silently down the hallway, not looking back to the Uchiha . He brought his fingers lightly through his hair, tensing a little as he felt Itachi come a bit closer to him. Finally, he looked behind himself and said, "You don't have to be so close, Itachi."
Said boy merely shrugged before walking to Sasori's side.
"…" Sasori looked away.
"I can't walk beside you anymore, Sasori?"
"I never said that," Sasori mumbled. "I just…it feels like you're still trying to protect me."
"And what's wrong with that?"
"I want to learn to protect myself." Sasori turned back to him. "I–"
"You're going to close yourself up," Itachi reminded, making Sasori's expression darken. "What are you trying to learn if that's what you're doing in the first place to protect yourself?"
"…I don't need you trying to make me feel bad, Itachi…"
"I don't think withdrawing will help you, Sasori."
"Well I do."
Itachi sighed and breathed out, "Foolish…"
"Stop calling me that." Sasori glared.
"What you're doing is foolish, Sasori."
"No, it's not." Sasori scowled obstinately. "Pain's the foolish one. He only thinks about peace. Even when Orochimaru had screwed with Deidara's mind, he decided to do nothing…"
"Don't change the subject."
"Tch!"
"There are other ways to deal with this. You don't have to seal up your emotions."
Ash-rose eyes narrowed.
"Sasori…is there something more to this?"
"Emotions are…something of humans."
There was that bitter tone again.
"Humans that…make up the humanity that took my parents away…the humanity that I despise…" Sasori gazed sharply at the Uchiha. "Why would I want to be similar to that that I hate?"
"…Isn't Deidara part of humanity?"
Sasori's expression grew conflicted. "I…stop trying to deter me…!"
They were at the exit already, but Itachi stopped and pressed Sasori against the wall gently.
"If there's anything that will stop you from doing this," he said, "then I'll try it."
"I've already had insulting thoughts because of these emotions…" Sasori admitted, glaring at the ground. "I remember…thinking something like, 'if I can't have him, then no one can,' about Deidara…" Itachi's eyes narrowed at this but he kept silent. "I…know it's abusive…and wrong…but these feelings I got as he became a larger part of my life…I didn't know how to control them…" He paused and attempted to regain his composure before continuing. "I don't want to lose anyone I care for ever again…"
"…You can't stop loss, Sasori," Itachi said. "When school is over…there's no guarantee that Deidara will still be with you."
"I know that…" Sasori bit his bottom lip before asking in a more quiet voice, "Why did I think something like that, Itachi…?"
"…"
"Was it because of fear…? That he'd be taken away? Or was it…control…? I wanted to control him, so he couldn't be taken away…?" Sasori's fingers drew into a fist. "Itachi…are humans so weak that they need complete control over someone else…in order to feel truly strong…?"
The dark-haired male said nothing, only reaching out his free hand to stroke Sasori's red locks one last time.
Sasori's face heated up a little, but he broke out of Itachi's grasp and headed towards the door.
It wasn't until he was outside that he realized it was still raining, and he walked a bit farther from the school before looking up into the cloudy gray sky.
"Sasori–" Itachi got out an umbrella and went after him, coming to a halt as he saw the redhead.
"…It was raining like this on the day that they went missing," Sasori murmured almost yearningly. "Wasn't it, Itachi…?"
"…Yes," Itachi replied quietly, as he watched the raindrops descend and hit Sasori's face, sliding down his cheeks like tears. "It was."
}}––––––»
Deidara looked up as he heard footsteps coming towards him. He frowned slightly and said, "I'm still grounded, y'know. Mom's adding on time to it for however long I'm here." He paused before mumbling almost inaudibly, "I don't even know how I convinced her to let me come here in the first place…"
"…" Sasori just sat down on the park bench, not looking at the blue-eyed boy.
"Oi…" Deidara blinked as he realized Sasori had seated himself almost too close, so close that their sides were practically touching. "Oi, danna, you're–"
"I know."
"But–"
"I want to be. I can be."
"Wha–" Deidara was cut off yet again as Sasori moved his hand so he was gripping the other's navy blue shirt.
"You're mine now." Silver eyes met with blue at last.
"Ah…" Deidara stared dumbly before smirking. "I belong to no one, un."
"You do now."
"Mm, you just keep thinking that…"
Sasori glared a little and his lips curved into a deeper frown.
"How cute!" Deidara leaned a little closer. "You're pouting."
"Am not." Sasori shoved him.
"Heh, believe what you want." Deidara wrapped an arm around the other's middle. He felt Sasori tense a little as he pulled him closer, but only nuzzled him.
"Nn…" Sasori flushed just slightly, and hesitated before resting his head on Deidara's shoulder.
"…So…"
"Yeah?"
"We're…"
"Yeah."
"Hah…" Deidara smiled a little. "Happy you've finally come to your senses, un…"
"Tch…" Lips bowed into a frown again.
"You're pouting again…"
"I don't pout."
"Fine, fine."
"…"
"…"
"…Didn't you have to go?"
"I don't mind being grounded more if it means I can stay with you."
"Hm…"
"What?"
"Nothing."
"Right…"
Silence.
"…I…"
"…?"
"…I like your…intransigence…"
"My what?"
"You don't listen to me like a fool…you keep pressuring your beliefs on me…I like that…"
"…You like that I put down your art and–"
"No, I like that you don't just fit your beliefs with mine to try and…suck up to me."
"Ah…"
"…It shows how set you are, like, your heart is…I mean…"
Deidara blinked. "Danna…are you…was that supposed to be romantic, un?"
"Mn…" Sasori looked up at him like it should have been obvious.
"Wha…" Deidara's lips twitched before he broke out laughing.
Sasori scowled and reddened slightly.
"That's…not romantic at all…!" Deidara snickered.
"…Shut it," Sasori muttered, glowering at the ground. "I tried…"
"I know." Deidara bit his lip to stop his laughter and brought his hand up to stroke Sasori's hair.
The redhead blushed more but stayed put.
"You're not flinching away?"
"I'm forcing myself not to." Sasori grunted. "…Feels weird…"
"Didn't you want to not be able to feel…?"
"…I don't know…"
"Aah?" Deidara looked at him oddly. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Let me try again."
"Wait a second–"
"Your openness."
"Che…"
"I like that you…don't try and hide yourself behind things. Things like makeup, or perfume…" Sasori hesitated before inching a bit closer. "…The scent I smell now is…yours…not some fabricated one, toyed with perfume or whatever. The face I see is yours, not one covered by a mask in hopes to make you more beautiful…"
"…" Deidara blinked.
"You're…you…you're not shrouding yourself…you're not hiding yourself from me…I…" Sasori's grip on Deidara's shirt tightened. His eyes narrowed. "I…"
"This one's much better, un…"
Ash-rose eyes widened slightly, as Deidara tilted Sasori's head up to lock eyes.
"This one's much more…artistic…"
A faint red color flushed his face. Sasori tried to not notice.
Deidara's breath, body, arms, hands…everything…was warm…it felt nice…
"Heh." Deidara pulled back and sat up straight, lightly stroking Sasori's hair again.
"…You're different from Itachi…"
"Mm…that's good…"
"…"
"…"
"Deidara…"
"Nn?" Deidara turned back to the redhead.
"…What…am I?"
Deidara held him closer.
"You're Sasori no danna…" he replied, pressing his forehead to the other's. "And that's all you need to be for me, un…"
Sasori smiled almost imperceptibly and lightly nuzzled the taller boy's shoulder.
The two said nothing for a while, with Deidara just stroking Sasori's hair.
"…I…"
Blue eyes looked back to the redhead.
"Waited for them…for the longest time…because she told me that they were coming back…" Sasori's eyes narrowed just slightly. "But they never did. I was waiting for someone who would never return. I don't…ever want to do that again…" A deep breath. "So…Deidara…" He looked away towards the ground, fingers drawing into a fist, gripping Deidara's shirt tighter. "…Don't you ever keep me waiting."
Deidara said nothing for a moment, before chuckling and lightly kissing his temple. "I'll see what I can do…danna."