A/N: Rubbish chapter. Then again they're all rubbish. I doth apologise :o

Chapter 4 – Tah, Mate

The second Rose placed the white sphere on the console, the TARDIS began to hum. The lights suddenly dimmed all around them as the TARDIS focused all of her power into the sphere, caressing it, coaxing it out. After a few moments the sphere began to lift up, hovering in the air...

It shone brightly, manifesting itself into a new form. Don and Rose shielded their eyes before the light began to recede and they drew back their hands to see the light had taken the shape of a body – the Doctor. But instead of the blackness they had become accustomed to this Doctor was pure white with black eyes, tendrils of light flooding out around him to create the magnificent image of a completely serene Doctor standing in front of them, smiling.

"Hello," he said in a voice that was calmed and perfectly even.

"Hi," Rose whispered.

"Don't be afraid," he said.

"We're not."

"Just slightly weirded out," Don admitted.

"Something's gone wrong."

"No kidding, Sherlock," Don muttered, rolling his eyes.

Rose elbowed him in the side. "Continue," she said to the Doctor's ghost, smiling.

"I am all that is good in the Doctor, I represent his light. You have already seen his side of darkness. Somehow we've been torn forcedly out of our host entity, that is the Doctor, and are now living as separate beings in the outside world."

"Which is why his dark side is trying to kill us?" Rose asked.

The ghost shook his head. "He was not trying to kill you. He was trying to kill me. He wants to be the dominant force in the Doctor and the only way that will happen is if I am destroyed. He was never trying to kill you. I was in the teddy you were holding, Rose."

"You were in the Kitchen too when he went all Stephen King on me?" Don asked.

The ghost nodded. "You were getting caught in the crossfire, so I protected you by moving the fridge."

"So what do we do?" Rose asked, turning to Don.

"Kill the dark side?" Don suggested.

Rose shook her head instantly. "No, we can't kill it, it's part of the Doctor, it's his balance. Besides that, we can't actually touch it."

"He can," Don said, gesturing to the ghost standing in front of them. "Though..." he paused, mulling it over. "No offence, but compared to him... well... you're tiny."

"I am sorry," the ghost said, looking a bit forlorn.

"Why are you so small?" Rose wondered. "The Doctor was a relatively nice guy... Is size, like, dominance?"

"The other ghost represents all of his bad thoughts, bad memories, bad decisions and bad feelings. I am the polar opposite."

"But he seemed kinda happy," Rose said, shrugging.

"Okay, but what do we do now?" Don said quickly, seemingly eager to move the conversation on. "We can't kill it, so we trap it?"

"But then what?" Rose asked, frowning.

"I am tired," the ghost standing in front of them suddenly said.

"Mental blast really takes it out of you, right?" Don asked, grinning. "Okay, rest. We'll protect you, and sort this out."

The ghost smiled gratefully, then disappeared in a blip of light. The sphere on the console dimmed as the TARDIS lights came back up again.

"So is the Doctor actually dead?" Rose wondered.

Don shrugged. "Pretty lively for a dead guy. But you saw it. No heartbeat, no brainwaves, nothing. He's deader than Ugg Boots." He paused, frowning. "Donna was into fashion?"

"But how did this happen?" she asked again, interrupting his identity crisis.

"We need to go back to the source. The Scientific base. Maybe if we can find out exactly how he died we can sort this whole mess out."

They arrived specifically three weeks after they had left, the base they had near destroyed beginning to commence rebuilding. After a flash of the psychic paper they were escorted to where the Scientists dwelled in a temporary home near the rebuilding. Don politely knocked on the door, which was quickly answered by a small red alien wearing cartoon glasses.

"Hello," Don said brightly, looking down at the small alien. "We're from the Intergalactic Federation of Investigation into Business-related err... Sabotage, we would like to ask you a few questions."

The alien looked slightly confused. "Cha?"

"Oh," Don's face fell. "Thought this might happen." He looked to the alien again. "Ma la fah sah bip boo kah kah?"

"Pah poo loo li foo fi fy cha ba," the alien answered, smiling.

"Gah," Don answered, then turned to Rose. "We've lost the translation circuit."

"Right," Rose muttered as they were ushered inside to a small, well-kept sitting room. The alien disappeared for a moment as more small red aliens across the room stared at them as though they were potential experimental specimens.

Minutes later a mug of green slush was given to each of them, looking less appealing to Rose than drinking her own urine. The alien who had met them at the door said something to the others across the room before sitting down next to Don and Rose. "Jah?"

Don turned to the alien. "Pah no kah cha bin boo bop bi chi?"

The alien looked surprised. "Lo! Poo pi pah gah boo ki kah too."

Now it was Don's turn to look surprised. "Cha? Ki kah?"

"Goo moo loo lie jah! Hee lee lie bie die doo poo poo!" The aliens across the room suddenly looked very interested in the conversation.

"Bloody hell!" Don exclaimed. "Gi yah yi poo la wee wi fi!"

"Haa hee tee, tah!"

"Blah!"

"Loo koo poo tee fah sah cah bah bee!"

"Blah bloo!"

"Chee choo choo mah mi koo!"

Rose sat staring at her cup of green sludge for what felt like ages as the conversation continued. She decided to take a tentative sip. It tasted like mushy peas.

Finally after ten minutes Don tapped her on the shoulder and got to his feet, bowing courteously to the group of red aliens. She followed his lead, bowing politely. "Poo bah li laa tah tah, kah," Don said, smiling.

The alien nodded and bowed courteously in return, showing them to the door.

Once they were out, Don turned to Rose. "Blimey," he breathed. "You get that?"

"Apparently not," Rose answered dryly.

"The machine he was electrocuted with... it didn't actually electrocute him. Well it did, but it didn't," Don said quickly in a very Doctor-like manner. "It was a prototype developed, it hasn't been tested, it's meant to filter the bad memories and good memories into to separate entities to be messed with to put them back."

"So what do we do?"

"The Scientists can easily put these entities back in the Doctor, but they need them both. We need to trap the bad side of the Doctor and bring both good and bad back here."

"Then the Doctor will be alive?" Rose asked hopefully.

"Well, I don't know about that," Don admitted. "Priority one is catching the bad. And we're gonna need some help. To Cardiff!"