Title: The Future is Nuts!
Summary: Another solar flare sends our heroes of old to the future. Daniel can't believe that someone like Vala even exists, but Jack is out to prove that there's more to her than meets the eye. Crazy women and betting. Who would ask for more? DV
A/N: This is the one fic that I never finished. I've received vehement demands over the past who-knows-how-long to wrap this up. I found this chapter and 2 more among my files today and thought, eh, what the heck, put this up. It's not finished yet, and I am not sure when it will be (or how for that matter), but at least it's being updated after forever. I hope you enjoy and let me know what you think.
Later that evening, the Odyssey beamed both SG-1 teams to the bridge. "Welcome back, SG-1," the Colonel in charge greeted them.
"Thank you, sir," Mitchell responded.
"Colonel O'Neill, as soon as we make it to the Gairus system, we can send you and your team home. The trip'll take about two days. Feel free to roam around. When you're ready to turn in, just ask for your keycards."
The older SG-1 nodded their thanks. Jack turned to Mitchell. "And what about you?"
"Oh, we'll be off gallivanting somewhere soon enough. The Gairus system happens to be on our way. We'll see you guys later." The younger Colonel motioned for his team to follow him to the briefing room.
"Well, time to wander…"
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And wander they did. Unfortunately, they were restricted from entering the more interesting sections of the ship. That left the infirmary, commissary, and gym. No one felt like visiting the infirmary. So they hung out, completely bored, in the commissary for hours. It was about 2300 hours when Jack, Sam, Teal'c, and Daniel decided to find their quarters.
They arrived on the bridge to get their keycards and some directions. The room was abuzz with some emergency. People ran back and forth between consoles like worker bees in the hive. Teal'c managed to get the attention of a less distracted fellow sitting at a console.
"Keycards? Right…" he hurriedly accessed the ship's manifest on his screen. One by one, keycards slipped out of the unit. He handed one to each of them. "Colonel O'Neill, Major Carter, your quarters are on Level 18, Section B. Teal'c, Level 27, Section G. Dr. Jackson, looks like you're on Level 34, Section A. Have a good night." With all the excitement going on, the four exited the bridge quickly so they could get out of the crew's hair.
They said their goodbyes and separated. Daniel walked down the lonely corridor on Level 34 to his room. The hall lights were dimmed to simulate nighttime. Hands in his pockets and head down, he contemplated the events of the past few days. He couldn't get her out of his mind. That woman was completely insane, and it was as if his future self was oblivious to it. Actually, it was more like he accepted it. But how?
Daniel had seen her beat someone up, threaten someone, scare base personnel, and… hold his hand? It was all too contradictory. Where would he ever find such a fruitcake? He found the door to his quarters and slipped the keycard through the reader. He yawned as the door opened.
Stepping forward, his eyes were bathed in pitch blackness as the door closed. Daniel could just barely make out the form of a bed in front of him. He stripped down to his boxers and slipped in. It was surprisingly warm, but the archaeologist was too tired to wonder why.
Minutes later, something moaned. It was distinctively female. Daniel's eyes shot open. He realized there was someone next to him. The person shifted her weight and turned toward him. Still in shock, he froze. Her leg trapped one of his. Her hand slithered across his bare chest. And her mouth breathed hot air onto his neck. Part of his body unwillingly responded.
"Uhhhh… excuse me." He didn't know what else to say.
A husky female voice answered back, "You're excused, Darling." She shifted more and moved on top of him. She kissed his neck, from ear to shoulder.
"Ummmm…" The second her hand reached down below, Daniel let out a yelp and pushed her off of him. He had an idea of who it was and did not want to go there. The bedside lamp flicked on.
There she was on all fours, clad in a red lacy number and breathing heavily. For him.
"Vala? What are you doing in my room?!?"
"Oh it's your room, now?" she spoke seductively. She crawled toward him on the bed. "Well, if you want to play that game…"
The door opened. Light from the hall flooded the room. It also revealed the other Daniel Jackson in the doorway. "What the…"
Vala smiled. "Well this is a treat!"
The older Daniel quickly shut the door. "Vala, that's not me."
"Of course not. He's him and you're you."
"No." The older Daniel moved to the bed and caught her face in his hands. He attacked her mouth with a hot kiss. "I mean that's not your Daniel."
She got over her momentary bliss. "Oh." Vala turned toward the younger Jackson. "So what are you doing in here, then?"
"What? This is my room. I could ask you the same damn thing!"
"Actually, it's our room. Mine and Vala's," his counterpart said calmly.
The younger Daniel scrunched his face and looked around. He didn't recognize any of the personal belongings littering the shelves and tabletops. If this really were his room, then it should be devoid of such things. "Oh crap."
His older self gave him an awkward smile. Turning to his wife, he said, "Maybe you should cover up."
"What for? It's only you," she said with a playful smile.
"Vala."
"Just kidding. Excuse me." She made a show of getting up very slowly, then sauntering over to the washroom to find a robe. Both Daniels watched her go, one with interest, the other, well, with more interest. Hard to say which was which.
Finally, they turned to each other. The older Daniel spoke first. "I think the bridge made a mistake. They tried to send me to the wrong quarters."
"Obviously there was a mix-up."
"Yeah, this is the level for married couples. Your quarters are two levels down."
The younger Daniel swallowed the lump in his throat. "Married? You married her?"
His counterpart smiled, knowing exactly what he was thinking. "Yup, best three years of my life."
Vala came up behind him, now fully covered. She wrapped her arms around his chest. "And certainly the most exciting," she said with a hint of innuendo. The older Daniel grinned like a fool.
"Uhhh, I guess I should be going. Sorry?"
"No problem. Here's your keycard. Hopefully you'll find the right room this time."