Chapter 29: A Missing Captain
When McCoy arrived on the bridge, the Captain's chair was empty. The people on the bridge looked at the Doctor with only mild curiosity. McCoy swore under his breath. His eyes landing on the pleasant back of Uhura, the Doctor walked towards her for a little information.
"May I ask where our dear Captain is?" McCoy did not try to hide the frustration in his voice.
Uhura took the earpiece from out of her ear and turned to look at McCoy. "Am I my Captain's keeper?"
"No," the man replied. "But you sure are wiser than most people here and I trust you a hell of a lot more."
The woman smiled from the compliment. "Well thanks, honey. You know a few pretty words make all the difference."
Her eyes flicked to the Captain's chair and back to McCoy, in the process trying to make sure that no one was paying them any undue attention. "I don't know where he is," she sighed. "I heard someone say that they saw him going to talk to the head engineer but Scotty was in here a few moments ago. Sorry."
McCoy cursed Kirk under his breath.
"You can try Marlena," Uhura suggested. "She may know. Not that she would tell you. When the Captain is in one of his secretive moods he can be pretty adept at keeping mum."
McCoy smiled and patted her on the back. As he was leaving, the woman grabbed his hand.
"This wouldn't have anything to do with what I told you a little while ago, now would it?"
McCoy didn't answer, simply choosing to nod his head.
"Is he okay?" the woman asked in genuine concern.
"Now that depends on if I can find the Captain."
"I don't know how much prayers are going for these days, but you both will be in mine," Uhura said before turning back to the console.
"It can't hurt," McCoy mumbled under his breath as he headed for the lift.
* * *
Calling on the Captain's quarters proved no more successful for the Enterprise's Doctor. Though Marlena was there, she seemed reluctant to say anything that would give away her lover's whereabouts.
"Well can you contact him?" McCoy pleaded. "It's an emergency."
"I am not a ball and chain around Kirk's ankle Doctor," Marlena answered in her husky voice. "I respect his privacy and he respects mine."
"Well that would make you the only one whose privacy he does care about," the Doctor snapped.
The woman looked both amused and offended by the comment.
"Look," McCoy said, a fresh idea forming in his mind. "It is of the utmost importance that I talk to him…"
"As you have said repeatedly, Doctor," Marlena said, all amusement gone. "Now I must say good…"
"I found something wrong with Kirk during the last physical," McCoy interrupted.
"What?"
"If I don't find Kirk he can be in very fatal danger."
This tactic seemed to work on the woman and the man cursed himself, this time, that he hadn't thought of it before. She turned and looked around at the room behind her. Fixing McCoy with an icy stare she mumbled something under her breath.
"Look," she whispered. "It will take me a while to locate him. I will tell him what you said."
The Doctor folded his arms. "I will wait here."
The look the woman shot him now was pure poison. "No. You go back to your office and wait like a good boy."
The woman clearly did not want him around, and not wanting to push his luck, McCoy acquiesced. Heading back towards his office. He, at least, felt more confident than before.
* * *
Together, in McCoy's office, Spock and the Doctor waited. Sitting on the floor, watching the Vulcan pace around the limited space of his confinement, McCoy saw clearly the change that had occurred in the First Officer. All trace of his reserve was quickly vanishing. Left to the man was simply nothing more or less than all the base impulses that any sentient creature seemed to be forever plagued with.
Once the epitome of patience, it was evident that Spock had none left.
"Luckily the floor of that cell is made of metal or you'd likely wear it out," McCoy said, trying for some comedy.
From the expression on the Vulcan's face, the Doctor understood that he had been wrong: Spock, apparently, was currently not suffering from any sense of humour.
"Sorry," the human apologized, earning an irritated look in the process. "I am sure that Kirk will hurry. If he thinks that he's in trouble that seems like a pretty safe bet."
"I do not care if he appears," Spock stopped his pacing and looked at McCoy. "As I explained earlier, I have little faith in your plan, Doctor. Kirk will not care or help me in any way."
"But…"
"I am in a state of fear, McCoy," Spock confessed. "I can feel every bit of logic and restraint that I have ever gone to for refuge slowly crumbling Doctor. And I can sense that I will soon not care for you or anyone else that I have come to know. Even now I look at you sitting there, Doctor, and I can feel only anger."
"You can't help that, Spock," McCoy tried to comfort. "It is against your will. Do you understand that?"
"Yes," Spock replied. "Believe me, Doctor. I understand that very well. Still it is an affront to me… to my very being. I do not expect you to understand that, nor feel what I am feeling. Soon I will be very close to killing you. I can feel that emotion starting to build. For the sole reason that you can not help me, your inadequacy, your lack of effect, the very reason why you loathe yourself, is the same reason why I will hate you."
The words were cruel, more hurtful coming from the only person he truly had let himself care for, McCoy knew. Still he did not flinch from them and took the blame that was rightfully directed at him, the Doctor felt.
"Doctor McCoy," a voice suddenly forced itself between the human and Vulcan. It was readily identifiable as Kirk. "I heard you wanted to talk to me."
If McCoy hadn't felt so destroyed he would have laughed at the fear he heard coming from the Captain's voice. "I'm here," he replied.
"Come to my office, ASAP!" the voice ordered. "And bring everything you'll need."
Freeing himself from the Vulcan's hate and gaze, McCoy stood. He looked at Spock, who was avoiding his eyes.
"I'll be back as soon as I can."
"It doesn't matter," Spock stated. "If you chose to never return I would not blame you."
The words struck McCoy worse than any other the man could have chosen.
"I would never, never do that. Do you understand me, Spock?"
The Vulcan did not reply. Not waiting for one, nor wanting to waste any more time, McCoy exited the room, purpose driven in every step he took.