I don't own Ashes to Ashes

Big thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter – I'm glad the writers block didn't affect it too much, and thank you as ever for sticking with it this far. More plot this time, with a bit of relationship advancement too :-)

Enjoy!!!

Mage of the Heart

x

---

She didn't quite know what to think as she sank into her uncomfortable chair, taking stock of the numerous disorderly files before her with a soft sigh and settling in to work. She had been expecting nothing of Gene on their return- a brush-off, perhaps, or a brisk and abrupt goodbye with perhaps a half-hearted brush of his lips across her cheek; she hadn't expected to be pressed so hard into a wall, to have him kiss her quite so possessively, almost desperately... And yet, it was so cold, so rehearsed and un-responsive, that something about it made her skin break out in fearful goose-flesh. It had felt both pleading and uncaring, and somehow, even as she busied herself, the memory of the harsh pressure of his mouth on hers, and the recollection of his abrupt attitude for the whole journey back did not wish to leave.

And yet, underneath all the desperation, she wondered if he was simply saving her skin, doing what he thought was dutiful for taking her away against a superior officers wishes, kissing her desperately to fool Harrison – as he had done so very, very successfully – into thinking they had spent the hour having heated, sweaty sex... She understood, she supposed, that he would be distant; it had become obvious, in those few awkward minutes after their short-lived conversation, that he had placed a great deal more thought into their future than she herself. Until a few days ago, at the back of her mind she had not – consciously, at least- even decided to stay here with Gene, and here, in the midst of their next huge step together, moving into their own home, she discovered that he had considered more than that; had he considered names, as well? How soon did he expect them to start? With a groan, she put her head in her hands, kneading at her forehead with her fingers, pulse throbbing. The quiet of the office was broken by the phone on her desk ringing violently loud, the clanging making her head pound as she let out another groan and reached out for it, only to find that as she did so, another hand came down, scooping it up. Alex looked up as Superintendent Harrison answered with a drawling 'yes?' and for a few moments she stared in disbelief. A few seconds later, he was holding the phone out looking thoroughly annoyed about something, and she took it gingerly, frowning as he retreated into his office.

"Hello?" She asked timidly, slightly bewildered.

"Ma'am?" Shaz's voice was relieved, and Alex couldn't keep the frown from her face.

"Is everything alright, Shaz?"

Shaz seemed to ponder this for a moment, and then said, in an undertone that was clearly meant for nobody but Alex herself, "well... not exactly, Ma'am, only... well I don't really know what's wrong, either."

"What's happened?" Alex asked warily, glancing towards Harrison's office, but breathing a sigh of relief when she saw that he was bent firmly over his desk, scribbling something on the report in front of him.

"Well, Ma'am, that's just it; the Guv's just been – well, he's just locked himself in his office... and I know I shouldn't have looked Ma'am, but he left the curtains open a bit, and – well, Ma'am, he's not happy. He's just drinking and smoking and throwing darts, and he's told us not to disturb him unless someone dies, only, someone has died, and he sent Ray and Chris off on their own and said unless someone was castrated and hanging from their toes, then we weren't to disturb him, and-"

"Shaz, get him on the phone," Alex said, pressing her fingers into her eyes and groaning slightly. "And if he refuses, tell him I will personally see to it that he spends the next year in a state of intense sexual frustration!"

A long pause stretched down the phone, and then, reduced to her previous timidity, Shaz asked, "is everything alright, Ma'am? With you two, I mean? He seems mighty upset about something, if you don't mind my saying so."

"Everything's fine," Alex assured her quickly... too quickly, she realized, in retrospect, and she knew Shaz realized as much as the younger woman sighed softly.

"I'll just go get him, Ma'am... or try to, anyway." There was a clunk as the receiver was placed on the table, and Alex heard the clip-clop of Shaz's shoes on the office floor, followed by several recurrent thuds. There was silence, followed by Shaz's timid voice.

"Guv? Guv, DI Drake's on the phone- she wants to talk to you."

----

If Gene had known it would be this much trouble, he wouldn't have suggested it in the first place; kids and family were all well and good when you were married and settled down, and he knew well enough that whatever some people believed, most modern women were still firmly for 'marriage then kids', not the other way around. He supposed, in the midst of moving in together, he had deluded himself into believing that Alex was different, more reserved; she would have to be, surely, to take up with a nicotine-stained drunk with verbal diarrhoea and the mind of a sewer? But he supposed that he had been wrong, and that deep down, however committed Gene tried to be, Alex would always want the marriage he had once sworn never to lumber himself with again.

It was different now though- it wasn't that he didn't want to marry Alex, it was the knowledge that his last marriage had fallen so drastically to pieces, and that whatever he'd told himself to the contrary, it had hurt like a kick in the teeth. The idea of that pain repeating on him now, probably multiplied numerous times in intensity when he considered the fact that he was now caught up in a complicated web of emotions he had never before experienced, was almost unbearable. There was something entirely cold and corporate about divorce proceedings; he had been left exhausted and bewildered after he and his wife broke up, and though there was little emotion in their relationship from start to finish, it had drained him, and he couldn't handle the thought of getting caught up in legalities if his relationship with Alex were brought to an end. He wanted it to last, he wanted everything that a marriage was – the commitment, the trust, the companionship, the family – but he wanted to be certain, he wanted to have no doubts whatsoever that the day he placed a ring on Alex's wedding finger it would be forever... For a while, he had managed to convince himself that was the case; he'd have asked her to marry him when he handed over his mothers ring if she hadn't seemed so terrified by the whole thing, and now he wondered exactly what she was thinking, what she wanted from him...

Like kids- he'd thought that was a given with Alex. He knew she missed Molly, knew that there were some nights in the depths of sleep where she sobbed her daughter's name into his chest, knew that at the back of her mind there was no forgetting the little girl who, for whatever reason, she couldn't see... But he'd always thought, however naively, that it wouldn't stop her from wanting another child; he didn't know the circumstances of her marriage, and so he didn't know just what led to Molly being born, but he didn't need a degree in Alex's psychiatry or whatever she called it to know that she adored the little girl she'd given birth to more than life itself. Was it him, then, that made her so resigned to the idea? Maybe it wasn't that she didn't want more kids, just that she didn't want them with him- He was a chimney smoking, drunken has-been, and by all accounts she was out of his league, despite the foolish notion that he had, in such a delusional manner, believed that none of it mattered.

The whiskey bottle was slowly emptying, and as he got lower down into the glass his thoughts became slowly more irrational, and his cigarettes began to dwindle until he had only two left from a packet of twenty. When Shaz knocked on the door, he could have snapped with rage, was tempted to throw the glass bottle at the door and tell her to leave him to his drink without disturbing him, but her words hit home as he knew no others could, and a moment later he had lowered his feet from the desk, looking at the door almost fearfully as Shaz went on.

"She says you need to come and talk to her..." The words echoed in his ears, and they didn't quite process until he'd stood and walked over, only stumbling once as he attempted to avoid the bin and ended up catching his boot on the leg of the table. A few moments later though, he had opened the door, blinking slightly as the light from the main office threatened to burn his irises, only then realising the perpetual darkness he had been plunged into during his miserable spell in the office.

"Tell her she'll have to ring me 'erself," he said gruffly, glancing only once at the phone, then back at Shaz, who looked utterly petrified, closing her eyes quickly and answering at an almost inhumane speed.

"DI Drake said if you were to say that I was to tell you that you were going to spend the next year in a state of permanent sexual frustration!" She stopped for breath at the end, opening her eyes and looking nervously at Gene, who stared at her in blank shock for several seconds, before grunting something incoherent and heading to the un-hinged receiver, which he lifted to his ear.

"What'd you want, Bolly?" He asked, struggling to form the words in his mouth as he tiredly rubbed his forehead, resting his behind on Shaz's desk with no regard for the stack of paperwork he sent flying.

"To tell you that you're behaving like an immature and pre-pubescent spoilt brat who didn't get his way, and that if you don't start behaving professionally about the whole thing I will personally march down there and ignore all evidence of my punishment to tell you that you're a completely idiotic little child!"

Gene took a few moments to successfully understand the words, but when he did, after much clenching of his eyes and kneading of his forehead, he sighed. "I'll talk to you later," he muttered. "See you at home, Al-"

"Don't you dare hang up on me!" Alex answered irately, her tone rising slightly before she returned to normal pitch and volume. "We can talk later about what exactly is upsetting you, but if you don't behave like a mature, reliable member of the force, then you're a fool!" her voice quieted even further as she added, "The Super's already out to get you, and if you carry on like this then you're risking your job. Now please, go out, find Chris and Ray, and do something useful about that murder. I'll see you later."

Gene nodded dumbly, before realizing that she couldn't see him and deciding to speak instead, his tone utterly defeatist. "Yeah," he muttered, sighing. "'kay... I'll see you at home?"

"Pick me up after work," Alex said quietly, the reluctant smile evident even down the line.

Gene made a sound of assent, then, after a moment's awkward pause in which he searched for what to say, he spoke up, almost shyly, the alcohol he had so recently consumed plainly evident as he did so. "Alex..." he murmured, "y'know that thing you say sometimes?"

She was frowning, and he didn't need to see her to know it. "What thing?"

"Y'know, that thing, y'know... 'bout me?"

Recognition seemed to dawn on her, and a soft sigh of amusement came down the line as she whispered, "yes... what about it?"

"Say it..." his voice wasn't demanding; in fact, at that moment it was fearful and terrified, and Alex didn't bother to prolong his pain any further.

"I love you, Gene," she whispered, unconsciously gripping the phone tighter to her ear, treasuring the sigh of relief that left his lips and echoed into her mind. "We'll talk later, I promise."

Gene smiled briefly to himself, turning away from Shaz's curious gaze and nodding. "Yeah, 'kay... bye..."

"Bye, Gene," Alex murmured. There was a moment of hesitation, and then he spoke again.

"Oh, and Bolly...?"

"Yes?"

A brief pause, a slight hint of doubt and then, almost too quietly to hear and with an air of utter nervousness, he murmured, "love you too."

A second later he had dropped the phone back in its cradle, and the line went dead.

----

Alex could only blink and stare at her desk for several moments, the beep of the phone going ignored as she tried to process his words without hyperventilating. Of all the things he could have said, of all the civilities that could have left his mouth at that moment, she hadn't been expecting that. His quiet confession both delighted and scared her- it was almost desperate, a silent plea for her to understand, almost as though he were begging her not to do something... Guilt knotted itself in her stomach as she absently dropped the phone back into the cradle, one hand covering her mouth as she attempted vainly to carry on with the paperwork before her, but the words swam in front of her eyes, the letters muddling and making no sense as his timid voice echoed in her ears, speaking words she hadn't ever expected to hear...

"Drake?" Harrison's voice was oddly polite as Alex snapped her head up, and she had to frown as he held the door to his office open, loosening his tie on his neck as he indicated that she enter. After a moment's hesitation, she stood up, stepping into the office and standing awkwardly in front of the desk, wringing her hands uncomfortably. He shut the door behind her, walking round his desk to sit himself down and indicating the chair before her. She took it, nervous, fingers subconsciously toying with the ring on her finger, throat dry as she worried that perhaps he'd bugged the phone call and heard it all, that perhaps he would march down there and fire Gene on the spot... did they even have telephone bugs in nineteen eighty-two? Her mind was in such panic that she couldn't even think straight.

"This thing with Hunt," Harrison said, looking at her from across the desk as he pulled out a cigarette and lit up. "You realize that, when it all goes tits up, I won't accept your resignation, right?"

Alex blinked, both stunned and insulted. "Excuse me?"

"I won't accept a resignation on the grounds that you shagged a superior and it all went wrong, Drake." His frank bluntness was surprisingly comforting- at least he hadn't bothered beating around the bush.

"I wouldn't expect anything less, Sir," Alex said softly. "Though I'm not sure you need to worry about that."

Harrison sighed, taking a long drag on his cigarette before he leant forwards, resting his elbows on the desk as he looked at her. "Trust me, Drake; blokes like me and him aren't in it for the long haul. Married to the job, married to the fags, and married to the booze; just be careful." He stood up, as though the conversation were over, as though that were all he'd called her in for, but a moment later, Alex answered him without real conscious thought.

"But you're married!"

He paused in his perusal of the files on the cabinet in front of him, apparently surprised by her reply, before slumping back in the chair. "You already know that I'm sleeping with one of the WPC's, Drake, so don't think you're fooling me with the show of naivety. Married coppers look better than single coppers, alright? It's a mental thing, and you of all people can understand it I should think- if you've got a wife and kids, people think you'll understand what it's like when one of theirs goes missing, or gets killed or kidnapped or falls in front of a bus; it ain't rocket science. When coppers like Hunt and me were younger it was a bloody sin to be caught shagging anyone if you hadn't got a ring on her finger, so we did it- marriage ain't a commitment for people like us, it's a tip-off for a promotion. Think about it; if you've got two coppers in the force five years, but ones married, he gets the job, and he gets the trust because people like him better- so just don't expect a miracle from Hunt, or you'll be disappointed."

"Why are you telling me this?" Alex asked after a long silence.

Harrison shrugged. "You're a good copper, Drake. So is he, in his own way. But you're clearly in deep where he's concerned, and I'm just warning you not to expect a lot from him; it's not a reflection on him, it's a reflection on all of us. Just don't get carried away."

She couldn't help but stare at him; the truth of the matter was, his words made sense for almost every copper she'd ever met, even in her own time; life revolved around criminals, drink and forgetting anything to do with the misery they witnessed day to day. She didn't doubt, when she took the time to ponder it, that her own obsession with her job had gone some way to burning the bridges of her own marriage to Peter before Molly came along; of course, Peter's own lack of interest in their daughter hadn't helped, but she knew that her passion for the force had only fuelled their arguments.

"With respect, Sir," Alex said eventually, "I think my relationship with DCI Hunt is perfectly stable, and I have no reason to believe otherwise."

Harrison inclined his head, giving her a small, oddly understanding smile that went some way to changing her formerly adverse opinion of him. "Then for your sake I hope you're right." He stubbed out his cigarette, drawing out another almost immediately as he spoke again. "You know, I have nothing against him; but Policing is my priority- if things go pear-shaped between the two of you, I need your complete assurance that your work won't be affected. People die if we do our jobs wrong, Drake, and the fact of the matter is, a lovers tiff can lead to stupid decisions in the heat of the moment..."

Alex nodded. "I know that Sir... but you're hardly completely innocent yourself." Her tone was pointed and matter of fact, but Harrison seemed unfazed, returning her accusation with an apathetic shrug.

"I'm not reprimanding your relationship with Hunt; Skelton and Granger are a plain example that some work relationships are bound to remain violently nauseating until the day one or other of them trips over their own boot and into an early grave. The fact of the matter isn't that they can't work, it's that men like me and Hunt are almost innately programmed not to allow them to." He took a brief drag on his cigarette, and then went on. "My marriage is only still together because of the kids; once they're old enough to understand, it's over, and neither myself nor my wife are denying it. My – for want of a better word – relationship with WPC Milner is a mutual arrangement, and it definitely doesn't affect our work."

Alex hesitated, remembering clearly the Superintendents reaction when Gene had brought up Harrison's affair with the WPC. "But- when Gene said about it, you were- you were scared!"

"Marriage is a fickle thing," Harrison mused, and for a moment Alex wondered if he was talking to her, or to himself. There was something bitter in his voice, and she wondered just how cynical the man before her really was before he went on. "I don't love my wife, and the feeling is most assuredly mutual, but the fact of the matter is, I made vows, and while I'm still married to her, I have to at least appear to be sticking to them." He flicked the ash from his cigarette and sighed, looking over at her almost tiredly. His brown eyes were open and unguarded as he murmured, "he's lucky, Drake, and he knows it. If he were ten years younger I'd be clapping him on the back telling him to get a ring on your finger bloody fast..." He hesitated, and then sighed. "Look, Drake, you don't need to listen and you don't need to believe me, but just think before you start getting too far ahead of yourself; he's still a rash copper underneath whatever else you've seen in him, so just watch yourself, alright? I'm not losing a perfectly decent DI because she fell into bed with her boss."

Alex blinked, and then murmured, almost imperceptibly, "It's more than you think, Sir."

He nodded, inhaling deeply. "Yeah, Drake, to you it probably is. Just make sure he's in the same place." He reached over to the side of his desk and pulled forward another file, which he tossed carelessly across the table. "Here," he said, standing up as she hesitantly drew it towards her. "It might help with the McKellen case; couple of links you might have missed, maybe. A mate of mine used to like that Merlot girl- eat your heart out, and get some work done." He pulled the door open, and nodded at her as she stood up, walking past him with a mixture of feelings in her stomach. He shut it behind her, and as she sank into her seat, she looked ponderously towards his office, watching as he sank into his chair and busied himself with yet another file. It was several minutes later, after replaying the conversation over and over again in her head, that she turned her attention to the small document he had handed over.

---

It was more detailed than Alex had become accustomed to; it was neatly organized and cross-referenced, with in-depth information on several of the leads that they had already followed- Joe Ellison, Jeremy McKellen, Sophia Merlot, followed by a later inclusion of her brother Ciaran, the latter two of which bore photographs glued firmly to the neatly laid out document. The two names that surprised her were those of Bartholomew Powler and Andrew Summerton; the faces that stared up at her were those of Barry, her false date from The Black Bull, and his openly gay friend Andy. She blinked several times, before reading the background on both, then picking up the phone.

----

"Bols, I can't just arrest the bugger because he's been in contact with a pair of former bloody convicts, can I?"

"Gene, you don't understand! Ciaran must have had a great deal more contact with Jeremy McKellen than he admitted to us if he regularly spent time with all of his friends! It says here that Sophia Merlot openly admitted that she and her brother both spend a great deal of time in The Black Bull, and that she was having a sexual relationship with Jeremy since at least March of last year!"

There was a pause, and then Gene muttered, "Thought that Barry twat told you he was shaggin' Jessie after Amanda said it wouldn't happen again?"

"Maybe he didn't realize that Jessie was Sophia- think about it. If you change your name, more often than not it's because you want to avoid something or someone- we never asked about a Sophia Merlot, did we? And perhaps they didn't even know about it – if it wasn't serious, what would be the use in sharing that with all of their friends? Please, Gene, we need to talk to Ciaran properly, in a real interview, with an attorney present if necessary..." She hesitated then added, in a quiet undertone, "I'll do whatever you like for a week?"

Gene's snort was loud down the phone, and his amusement was evident as he replied, in a flirtatious growl that set her stomach aquiver, "you do whatever I want anyway, Bols, with or without an arrest."

Alex smiled to herself, but, putting on her best pleading whine, she wheedled pathetically. "Please Gene, for me? I promise I-"

"Alright, Bolly," He groaned, sighing exaggeratedly. "I'll go get him first thing tomorrow, ok?"

"Thank you!" Alex said sincerely. "Really, Gene, this could be a huge help in this case, and if we can just talk to-"

"What happened to a year of permanent sexual frustration, Alex?" Gene queried in a muse-like tone. Alex blinked, thrown slightly off-topic, but, after glancing briefly at the Super, whose head was still bent at his desk, she couldn't resist following the new course of conversation.

"I – I don't know what you mean, Gene." Her innocent voice would fool nobody, and Gene least of all; he chuckled.

"Bollucks," he murmured, voice tinted with amusement. "I'm giving you something, so you'll give me a shag? Sounds to me like my little Fizzy-thonged housemate's turning into some sort of Tomcat..." His voice was teasing, and despite herself, Alex found herself blushing.

"I think that's a little unfair, Gene," she said softly, "after all, I'm-"

"Don't worry, Bolly," he replied softly, "s'long as I'm yer only punter, we can do your quid-pro-quo thing... l'll pick you up in an hour." The smirk remained fixed on Alex's face, even as Gene replaced the phone in the cradle.

----

Gene didn't really know why he'd said it when he had; he didn't doubt the truth of his words – or at least, from all the definitions he'd heard about love and its entailment, it fit unquestionably, and if that meant he loved her then yes, he supposed he did- and nor did he regret them. Despite his life-long reservation that love should not be voiced aloud following his father's abusive slander of its definition, there had seemed something almost natural about returning those small words instead of a simple 'goodbye', and though his stomach had remained in knots even as he went to join Ray and Chris at the crime scene, he felt no worry or doubt; if love was as complicated and wonderful as the feelings that rose up in his stomach and chest at the mere sight of her, there was nothing to deny anymore.

No, he didn't regret it.

What bothered him was not that he had said it, but the circumstances in which his admittance took place; had he come across as desperate, or clingy, or needy even? If they had been lying in bed together, he could have felt more assured that she understood, that she really knew how much she meant to him... Over the phone, it all seemed so impersonal, and in the midst of a disagreement it seemed such a classic mistake, and could easily be taken as a pathetic attempt to get her to stay with him... But could he have said it to her face, the first time? As he walked down the corridors towards her temporary office, he realized that the answer was no; he could barely bring himself to show her he felt anything at all unless he was given the directions on a plate or he was buried hilt-deep within her body. Honesty was all well and good, but at the end of the day, he wasn't used to revealing his feelings to anyone, least of all a woman who made his heart contract on sight...

His train of thought was interrupted as she stepped out of the glass-panelled doors, looking almost nervous as she met his gaze. For a few seconds, the air seemed to close in on his throat, and his breath constricted slightly as he waited for the awkwardness to pass; when it didn't, he did the only thing he could think of- he pulled her into his chest and pressed his mouth firmly against hers for a brief and yet surprisingly intimate moment. As he pulled back, gulping slightly as he fixated his gaze upon hers, he saw the slightest flicker of a smile on her lips, sliding her hand into his as he gently turned them both around, his arm slipping around her waist as they headed to the car.

----

It was an hour later, laying comfortably on their new sofa with Fitz sprawled out across their tangled feet and with glasses of wine in hand, that Gene shifted slightly, his hand moving to rest softly on her lower stomach as his lips teased across her forehead. She tensed slightly, glancing nervously up at him, but moving marginally closer as he continued reassuringly caressing her stomach with gentle fingers.

"Is it Molly?" he whispered eventually, oddly comfortable with initiating the conversation, despite the nervous knot in his gut. Her face shifted slightly, burrowing into his shirt so he couldn't see the tears that slid from her eyes; he didn't need to. He softly placed his glass on the floor, prying hers from her hand and setting it beside his own before holding her tight against his chest, a hand tangling into her hair and gently stroking at her scalp. His overwhelmingly comforting touch, the soft hush of his grating voice and the caress of his lips across her head was too much; a moment later, Alex was sobbing into his chest, her body shaking, and her breathing ragged.

Gene said nothing, holding and comforting her until the bitter expression of grief had passed, his shirt wet with tears as she sniffed and wiped at her eyes. As she calmed, he cupped her face, staring into the puffy red eyes, taking in the tracks of black down her cheeks where her mascara had run, and the quivering bottom lip as she looked up at him. His lips descended on hers for the briefest of moments before he spoke softly, fingers tracing the lines of her cheeks.

"Don't cry anymore," he murmured, resting his forehead on hers. "Someone might think I'm goin' soft if they see me bloody comforting you." A weak smile breached Alex's lips and she nodded, rubbing at her nose with the back of her hand.

"Can't have that," she agreed softly. Gene watched her hesitantly, and then shifted so that his head rested alongside her own, their noses almost touching as his hand slid gently across her waist.

"Don't need kids," he said softly. "Just..." he gulped, and then, in a quiet voice, he went on. "s'far as I can see, Alex, filling the world with mini-Bolly's ain't a bad thing..." He tilted his face slightly, kissing the tip of her nose. "Just didn't think you'd mind kids after Molly..."

It was Alex who spoke next, cupping his face in her hands and meeting his eyes. "I love you, Gene... I just miss her- can you understand that?"

He nodded. "Yeah," he murmured. "I know you do."

There was a moment of silence, staring into one another's eyes until Alex spoke again, voice cracking with honesty. "I didn't love Peter like this, Gene," she whispered, eyes full of pain. "What if I love your child more than I love Molly?"

Gene blinked, frowning, then shook his head. "You wouldn't."

"I might," she whispered desperately. "How can you know that? I didn't plan for Molly, it wasn't like it is with you, I didn't love-"

He covered her mouth with his hand, ignoring Fitz's groan of protest as he shifted closer, nudging the dog lightly with his foot. "She's yer daughter, Alex. Don't matter who she came from or where she is, nobody's trying to replace her; you love her, an' you wouldn't be the woman I-" he hesitated, then spoke softly, "you wouldn't be my Bolly if you didn't." His fingers tangled in her hair, gaze falling on the flyaway wisps that escaped him. "Only want kids if you do... It's you an' me- that's what matters most, alright? Kids ain't gunna change how I feel about you... Just thought with you an' me, we could make this parent thing work..." He trailed off, and then pulled her closer, his lips next to her ear, voice gruff. "S'long as I've got you, Bols, everything else can wait..." There was a brief wait, and then, softly and quietly, he added, "'ave I got you?"

Alex nodded, looking up to meet his gaze with tearful eyes. "Yes," she whispered. "You know you do... and I do want children with you, it's just- right now, I had no idea you were- well... I had no idea that you'd even thought about it, and I didn't know it was even a possibility, until you said about calling the first one Gary Baldy, and then I-"

Gene chuckled, holding her slightly tighter. "If that's what holding you back, Alex, we can call 'em something else..."

She smiled. "No, I'm not holding back, I just... I didn't realize it was a possibility... I'd never have joked about being pregnant, but it was the first thing that came to mind to distract you and- well, I didn't realize we'd argue about it."

"Mmm..." Gene dipped his head slightly, lips trailing up over her neck. "Sorry," he murmured, "just got paranoid..."

Alex's eyes, which had closed under the tender caress of his mouth, flew open as she asked, startled, "Paranoid? Why?"

He hesitated and then gulped, resting his forehead on the warm skin of her neck before he spoke again. "Thought maybe I weren't good enough... Thought maybe you'd only ever wanted kids with yer 'usband and I wasn't up to scratch... his lips brushed her skin again as he whispered. "Got worried I was just fillin' a gap..."

Alex drew his head back, meeting his eyes with both of her hands cupped around his cheeks. "You are a ridiculous man," she said affectionately, pressing her lips to his nose for a small moment. "I would never have agreed to wear your ring if you were simply 'filling a gap'."

Gene looked away, momentarily sheepish, his hand seeking hers out and drawing it up to eye level; his mothers ring glinted back at him, and he kissed her hand softly as he met her eyes again. "Yeah... maybe..."

"No 'ifs', no 'buts', no 'maybes'," Alex said sternly, eyes sincere. "I am completely, irrevocably in love with you, Hunt, so stop dilly-daddling around and say you'll have children with me!"

Gene stared at her, taken aback, and managed only a high-pitched, "ey?" before Alex was kissing him firmly, mouth hard against his.

"Tell me you want children, Gene." She said softly, drawing back.

Still slightly dazed, Gene nodded, voice hazy. "Yeah... course I do, yer daft tart..." He kissed her again, and almost as quickly, he drew back, "just, don't boss me around like that in front of the kids, 'ey? Ain't good for the image."

Alex grinned. "Of course not," she said, teasingly adding, "you daft tart."

"'s'enough o' that," Gene growled, and leaned in to steal a kiss.

----

Another huge thank you to Feline :-)

Hope you liked it :-)

Mage of the Heart