Hikaru wasn't sure what cakes had to do with making someone fall for you. In fact, he was pretty sure that Haruhi wouldn't even care for one, but as 'Bake a cake' was on the almighty-list-of-commoner-knowledge-and-lovey-dovey-stuff, he was determined to do it anyway.
He easily brushed aside the fact he had never baked a cake before in his life.
It couldn't be that hard.
He was a Hitachiin after all.
His plan was to get up really, really early, quickly bake the best cake the world had ever seen, show it off to Kaoru, then finally give it to Haruhi and watch her commoner instincts be totally and amazingly impressed.
He was such a genius.
It was 4:30 am and Hikaru had succeeded in waking up, getting dressed and sneaking out of his bedroom without his twin waking up, which was a feat in itself. Kaoru often switched from sleeping like a log to waking up at the tiniest noise and Hikaru didn't really feel like being laughed at; well, not until he had an amazing cake to show off anyway.
He had then jogged down a floor to the nearest kitchen which, luckily, was also the smallest (Hikaru would have undoubtedly been overwhelmed if he had gone to the main kitchen and seen all the cooking appliances they had stuffed into there; best to keep it basic). He knew a cook or maid or someone would be coming to cook the twin's breakfast here soon enough, but he was equally sure he had plenty of time alone in the kitchen before that happened.
They wouldn't start getting his breakfast ready till… uh… you know, whenever they started getting his breakfast ready.
Whenever that is, I'll be done by then. Hikaru assured himself, feeling very manly as he took a recipe book down from a shelf. A cake can't take that long.
Kaoru was generally a very patient person.
He had to be to live with his beloved, short-tempered twin.
The youngest Hitachiin had been woken up at a stupidly early time that morning to the sound of his brother swearing and hopping around the room. Kind of odd. Suspiciously, he had opened an eye to find Hikaru half-dressed and holding his foot comically, glaring viciously at a desk. Kaoru had decided to just pretend to be asleep and, after he had 'silently' finished getting dressed, Hikaru had slipped out of the room, muttering something to himself.
Kaoru was generally a very patient person.
If his brother wanted to sneak out of their room at a stupidly early time, that was up to him.
…
After ten minutes, Kaoru was getting annoyed at the muffled noises from the floor below.
After half an hour, Kaoru had been reduced to lying silently on his bed and listening for clues about what on earth Hikaru was doing in the second kitchen.
After almost an hour and a particularly loud bang (and a shout which sounded suspiciously like a swear), Kaoru kicked his cover off.
What the heck is Hikaru doing?! He fumed silently, quickly shrugging his green gown on. And since when does Hikaru get up early?
He was about to stomp out of their room to hunt his twin down when a sudden thought occurred to him; suddenly smirking evilly, he quickly skipped over to his bed again and grabbed a folded sheet of paper from under his pillow where he had hid it from Hikaru; he had almost forgotten about it.
He glanced at it and smirked again.
And Haruhi called him the innocent twin.
Careful not to wake any maids, Kaoru quietly padded across the hall (very much like a ninja he thought) and down a small set of stairs, carefully dodging a new vase that their mother had decided to plonk in the middle of a hallway; it made the hall look more interesting, or so she said anyway.
He heard another muffled yell, louder now and unmistakably from Hikaru's vulgar mouth, and he gripped the handle to the kitchen cautiously.
1, 2, 3...
Kaoru swung the door open (now seriously hoping it was his brother and he hadn't made a dramatic, pyjama-clad entrance to a load of cooks) and was greeted by the biggest mess he had ever seen in his life.
Flour was absolutely everywhere. Empty egg boxes were ripped and thrown in a corner. About twenty bowls were scattered all across the worktops, all overflowing with various types of… gloop. Hikaru was standing firmly in the middle of it all (his school uniform also covered with flour) glaring viciously at an oven which, now Kaoru looked at it, seemed to be smoking slightly.
"Quit it!" Hikaru ordered the inanimate object angrily in a whisper-shout; he was apparently too wrapped up his work to notice his twin standing bemused at the door. "Work, damn you!"
Is he…?
Kaoru bit his lip, begging himself not to laugh. Suddenly freezing (twin-y senses?), Hikaru chose then to turn round in horror, noticing his brother framed in the doorway.
Kaoru couldn't help it.
The smudge of flour on Hikaru's nose was the last straw.
The younger twin dissolved into complete hysterics, holding the door for support and struggling to breathe through his laughter. Hikaru instantly reddened, feeling very slightly mortified that his twin had found him covered in flour and cake mix at whatever-o'clock in the morning (at this point of his plan, he expected to have an awesome cake to show off), and stuck his lip out in protest.
"Kaoru…"he whined, "w-when did you get there?"
But his brother hadn't recovered to the point of words yet and simply shook his head, trying half-heartedly to stifle his hoots with a fist. Hikaru's ears were now as red as his hair.
"Don't laugh at me!"
"Heh…aha… sorry, Hika… but seriously," he chuckled again. "You got up this early to make a cake?"
"Ah, err… I just…" Quick Hikaru, think of an excuse! A good one! "I just felt like it?" He answered, mentally cursing the way his statement rose in a question; and he couldn't lie to his twin anyway.
Kaoru's eyes twinkled in amusement again as he grinned. "Oh really?" He drawled, taking the paper from his pocket and holding it up. "So it wouldn't have anything to do with this?"
For a second, Hikaru just stared blankly at him, so Kaoru (still grinning in his best Hitachiin manner) let it flop open to reveal what he had been amazingly amused to find in Hikaru's computer documents last night (not that he had been purposely looking, but when the idiot actually left it open when he took his turn in the bath, it was kind of hard to ignore; thus bringing the amount of time Hikaru actually kept his '101 ways to show you love someone' list a secret to a grand total of ten minutes).
The moment he recognized it, Hikaru's eyes widened in comic horror.
Without thinking, he instantly dived bodily for it (luckily, there wasn't anything bulky between them) but Kaoru, easily anticipating his impulsive brother's move, simply twitched it out of his reach and let him bang into him; if he had moved, Kaoru guessed Hikaru would've gone flying through the door and smashed his face right into their mother's new vase. Not a great idea.
Only pausing long enough to make sure Hikaru didn't fall over, Kaoru lightly stepped out of his brother's reach, smirking as he backtracked to the other side of the kitchen. Hikaru glared at him and pointed to the dubbed list of commoner knowledge irritably.
"W-where did you get that?!" He demanded, wondering wildly what had happened to his amazing plan.
"You mean your love letter to Haruhi?" Kaoru smirked again. "Well, if you're going to leave it on the computer screen while you take a bath…" He left the sentence hanging, leaving Hikaru to blink at his bad secret-keeping skills.
The computer.
Ah.
Well, crap.
He suddenly got Kaoru's hidden implications in his first sentence and blushed furiously again. "Hey, I- I didn't write it! I found it! On the internet!" He paused. "And who says it's for Haruhi?"
"What, are you secretly harboring feelings for Tono?"
"…Shut up."
"Exactly."
Kaoru's smile widened fondly as his twin uncharacteristically flushed.
"You're so cute, Hikaru." He laughed before glancing over the destroyed worktops and Hikaru's recipe book; on it (under the cake-y junk), he could see a picture of a stupidly perfect looking cake, complete with strawberries. "I don't think cooking's your forte though. Why a cake?"
"'Cause it's on the list." The older twin mumbled, trying to sneak closer to Kaoru without him noticing.
"But Haruhi doesn't really like sweet things."
A shrug. "It's on the list."
"So…?"
"It's on the list."
Kaoru raised an eyebrow sceptically at his brother's blind loyalty and gave the list in question a doubtful glance; in his mind, he was already splitting the 101 items into 'do-able' and 'un-do-able'(and 'downright stupid'; somehow, he didn't think his brother would be proposing marriage anytime soon). He suddenly noticed that Hikaru had shuffled right next to him and was eyeing the paper determinedly. Just as Hikaru's mind decided to dive, Kaoru quickly held the list out of his reach to which Hikaru stuck his lip out again in a sulk.
"Kaoru..." He whined for a second time, "Give it!"
"Nu-uh." Kaoru beamed at his annoyed twin (feeling unusually seme-ish). "Only if you let me play too."
Hikaru rose a suspicious eyebrow. "Eh?" He questioned, showing off his amazing intellect.
"What, were you planning to do this all by yourself?" Kaoru asked sceptically, as though Hikaru doing something so delicate by himself was an impossibility (the cake explosion around him had to agree). "I promise to help your attempts at wooing Haruhi." Hikaru blushed furiously as Kaoru's smirk widened. "So, let me play too!"
Hikaru was just hesitating, half unsure whether he was still be made fun of or not, when a sudden scuffle outside the door caught both boys' attention. Instinctively, they both ducked so they were hidden by a worktop when the door swung open; a reaction born from too many food fights, too many guilty consciousness and the fact their past selves had found it really fun to prank cooks who were paid not to get mad at you.
And they didn't really want to be caught red-handed at the scene of the… cake-bomb.
They held their breath as they heard a strangled gasp. For a second, the maid (or whoever had opened the door), just stuttered in horror.
"M…mice! In the kitchen! Raccoons! Vandals! George! Something's destroyed our kitchen!" (Hikaru mentally corrected her; actually, he thought, it was kind of their kitchen.) "George, get over here! What have you done to the kitchen?!"
Feeling slightly sorry for whoever George was (like he could remember the names of all their servants), Hikaru glanced over the work surface to see the door swing as someone ran out of it. Feeling very much like a 10-year-old caught out in an elaborate prank again, he look over at Kaoru and mouthed 'Abort mission?'.
Reminiscing as well, Kaoru nodded firmly and quickly crawled out of the back door; the moment the twins were out, they began to run back to their room, bolting from the scene of the crime (though, as Kaoru grumbled later, he didn't do anything).
Just as they collapsed back in their own bedroom again, giggling giddily, Hikaru's forgotten cake (which had been burning nicely in the oven since Kaoru had arrived) finally smoked enough to alert the fire alarms when the maid had unwittingly open the oven door (receiving a face full of smoke and an intense smell of burnt cake for her trouble).
The entire west wing went up in a piercing wail.
Kaoru winced.
He was never letting Hikaru go near an oven again.
:3 Forgive me if you see Hikaru as a good cook. Ever since he commented that cookie dough was like mochi and tried to play with it while Haruhi cooked, I just.... don't. Sorry Hika :D I hope you enjoyed this chapter :) I've already written the next three chapters (I know. Me. Planning ahead. It's so strange.) so I'll update in a few days xD
Please review! If you do you can have some of Hikaru's cake! :D
... Well, maybe not. ¬.¬