I don't own Ashes to Ashes

Wasn't going to be this long, but I ended up addressing it a little more in-depth than I had first thought! Hope it's alright! There's some plot in it, but there will be a lot more next time.

---

He closed the door behind him, feeling his heart pound vigorously in his chest. If this is it, I ain't gunna miss it... He bit his lip, gulping, wondering if Alex understood the fear and undercurrents those words had held as they left his mouth... He told himself he was being stupid, that he had no reason to fear losing her when they were so close, so strong...

But security had never been Gene's strong point; as a child, he'd grown up fearing his father and the house that he lived in, and the only sources of support that he'd had –his mother and Stuart- had been, although stable, kept so carefully hidden from his father's prying eyes, that sometimes he had found it difficult to believe in them at all. He'd had a marriage littered with affairs and lies, a career which was strewn with corruption in the only place that he had ever seen to be true, and now- now, somehow, despite everything that had happened, despite all that they had been through, those insecurities didn't seem to fade when he looked at Alex.

It wasn't that he didn't believe she loved him; of all the things that had once seemed inconceivable, he believed that implicitly, and no longer simply because he wanted to. Knowing that she returned his feelings, and that she believed in him meant the world and more... but it wasn't love he was worried about, he realized.

If love was his only qualm, the whole thing would be a whole lot simpler.

But it wasn't about love; love hadn't brought them together in the first place, after all. Love had grown after months of something else, something more primal and instinctive; the only chance he'd had of making her fall in love with him had come after weeks and months of her relying on him, of her needing him to protect and look after her... Would she still feel the same way once the fear and grief of the McKellen case had lifted? He couldn't forget that it was only after finding Rosa's body that Alex called him around to her flat, letting him hold her in the same way that he'd wanted to for months on end. Nor could he ignore the fact their very first kiss had taken place immediately after going to the scene of Jeremy's body, finding him covered in blood, bleeding hopelessly on the floor of his own home...

Gene gulped, glancing across at Ellison, who shivered and twitched in his chair, his eyes averted as he scratched at his arms and itched at the back of his neck. Did this man really have the power to end the case for good? Was a picture really all it took to confirm that Ciaran was a scumbag, just like all the others? And once it was over, once he was sent down for murder and left to rot in a prison cell for the next twenty or thirty years, what would happen to Gene? Would the walls suddenly fall down around him as Alex came to terms with the fact she didn't need him around anymore, that she no longer required his support? Would reality flood back into his life like a draft of cold air through an open door?

He shook his head, clenching his fists slightly in his pockets; there was no reason to be scared, when only last night she had told him that she loved him- it wasn't rational to be picking it to pieces like this. He wasn't the Psychiatrist in their relationship; she was the one who analysed and over-analysed things- Gene simply let the pieces fall as they may... but what if this time, the pieces didn't fall the way he wanted to? What if-?

The door opened, and Alex entered quickly, looking out of breath and worried, the expression on her face quickly melting into surprise as she glanced from one to the other of them. Gene sighed.

"Give me some credit, Bols," he muttered, sinking into his chair as she continued to stare. "I wasn't gunna punch him before an identification, was I?" Alex frowned, but nodded, joining him and settling a brown file on the table between them.

She hit the record button, dimly aware of Gene's eyes on her as she did so, but when she turned back to him, his eyes were fixed resolutely on Joe's nervous face. She frowned slightly, but a moment later, she redirected her attention to the man before them, who was shaking and trembling with fear and nerves as he looked at the file Alex had brought with her. She smiled at him reassuringly, speaking in a soft voice.

"I'm going to show you a few pictures now, Joe; is that alright?"

Joe bit his lip, but nodded slowly, his jaw quivering. Alex risked a small smile at him, before extracting a photo from within the file and sliding it across the table towards him, watching his face carefully; he flinched, but didn't turn away.

"I'm going to ask a few questions," she said gently, "just answer with a nod or shake of the head, ok?"

He nodded again, shaking where he sat, his knuckles going white as he grasped at the tables edge. Gene said nothing, keeping his arms crossed firmly over his chest and glowering darkly across the table.

"Do you know the young man in this picture?" Alex asked, pointing her finger carefully towards Ciaran's face, but not once taking her eyes from Joe's quivering form. Sweat broke out on his brow, trickling down his weather beaten forehead and over the plains of his sun-blistered cheeks, breaking out on his upper lip as he shook uncontrollably. His head made a slight jerking nod, the movement almost compulsive, but yet still reluctant, and a moment later he had looked away, still trembling. "For the record," Alex murmured, "Mister Ellison has nodded."

Still pointing to the picture, her eyes fixed on Joe's rapidly whitening face, she spoke again. "Did this man drink in The Black Bull with yourself and Jeremy McKellen?"

Another nod, tentative, but less aggravated than before, and Alex smiled slightly at him. "Did you know anything of the relationship between this man and Rosa McKellen in the months before her death?"

He shook his head, the action vigorous and angry. Alex nodded in reply, hushing Joe until he calmed back down, and then glancing sideways at Gene, who was tapping his fingers in agitation on the desk, obviously craving a cigarette; she swelled slightly with gratitude at the realization that he was holding back, before returning her attention to Joe. "Is this the man who told you 'not to tell'?"

Joe hesitated, glancing at Gene, then Alex, then at the photo; he nodded slowly, freezing, half-shaking his head, and then nodding again, chewing his lip as he did so, eyes mistrusting as he looked again at Ciaran's face- Alex frowned, but said nothing, for once. It was Gene, in the end, who spoke next, and his question surprised her.

"Did you know 'is sister, Sophia?" he asked, his eyes narrow, watching as Ellison flinched, bursting into renewed shakes as he bit on his nails, already so low down on his fingers that they bled as his teeth attempted to break them. Joe nodded eventually, though his eyes remained clenched shut and his sobs continued.

Alex frowned, and then glanced at Gene, then back to Joe. "And Jess Meridan? Did you know about her affair with Jeremy McKellen?" Alex's voice was soft and gentle, but Joe's reply was an instant nod, a bitter, wrenching sob leaving his throat... Barely a second later Gene was out of the chair and leaving the room, his coat billowing behind him as he went. Alex blinked, glancing at Joe, then after Gene, before murmuring "interview suspended," and following his lead.

---

"Need to talk to Ray," Gene said as they walked swiftly down the corridor, Alex hurrying to keep up with his long strides. She resisted asking questions, noting the concentrated knit of his eyebrows, the stubborn set of his lips that said he'd had an idea, a hunch, a suspicion that he needed either confirming or denying before he let anything else distract him... They passed Viv, giving him swift instructions to make sure Joe didn't leave, before entering the main office, watching with a slight hint of amusement as Ray quickly shoved the magazine he was reading beneath the desk. Alex rolled her eyes, catching a brief glimpse of a large-breasted woman wearing nothing but a leather thong as it fell to the floor, before she and Gene were at Ray's desk.

"The Merlot interview, Ray, where is it?" Gene's voice was impatient, his forehead creased into a frown, and Alex was struck slightly as she realized this wasn't the first time he had questioned Sophia's involvement. His hand was held out, his long fingers twitching impatiently, and Alex watched as Ray unlocked his top drawer and handed the tape over, surprised that it was so close to hand.

"Why isn't that in the evidence room with-?"

"Not now, Bols," Gene interrupted. Glancing at Ray, he muttered, "any calls, take one of the unmarked cars and sort it out- you're in charge." He didn't wait for Ray's response, simply turning away and heading into his office without so much as a backward glance. Alex looked at Ray, who looked particularly self-important, but he said nothing as she raised a questioning eyebrow, merely shrugging his shoulders and lighting up a cigarette as he retrieved his abandoned magazine from beneath the desk. Alex rolled her eyes, and then followed Gene into the office, opening her mouth to speak, but having him beat her to it the moment the door had clicked shut behind her.

"Told Ray not to let the thing out of his sight 'til I said so," Gene explained, pulling his tape player down from the top of a shelf and placing it on the desk, discarding the tape currently within it without a care, ripping the plastic casing away from the Merlot interview and slotting it into the player swiftly, speaking hurriedly as he pushed the lid down and reached for the whiskey bottle and tumblers at his side. "Should've spoken to 'im last night, really..." he shook his head in annoyance, unscrewing the cap of the bottle as he went on in explanation. "I didn't like it when she started sniffin' around," he muttered, "I mean, sure he's 'er brother, but she wasn't worried about him- something else got to her – she did too much bloody thinking about how to land us in trouble, I just didn't know what was naggin' at her..."

Alex blinked, watching as he poured amber liquid into either glass. "What?" she asked, frowning in unhidden confusion. "I don't see what else there could have been to be worried about... he's her brother, it's only natural for-"

"Bols, most people who want their brother out of prison talk to him when they get the chance, with or without another person in the room; she buggered off and got on 'er high horse about it- I wanna know why." He handed her one of the glasses of whiskey, swallowing down his own and pouring another generous measure into his glass in the space of thirty seconds, before taking a seat.

"Because she wanted to be alone with him?" Alex suggested, frowning. "Because she wanted to tell him not to do anything stupid, or-"

"Exactly," Gene muttered, swirling his whiskey and eyeing the player thoughtfully. "But stupid for who? She wanted him to 'ave a lawyer – someone to get him out without having to do too much talking himself..."

Alex stared for a few moments, and then frowned. "That's perfectly normal, Gene, plenty of people-" she trailed off as he looked at her pointedly, then started to talk again. "I don't know what you're saying, but-?"

"Alex, think about it," he said, his tone gravelly and low, "what links her and the three other main people in this case? Rosa, Ciaran, Joe and Sophia- what've they all got in common?" His eyes were imploring, and a moment later, it clicked.

"Jeremy McKellen?" She asked, surprised, meeting his gaze with a look of confusion. "But- why has that got anything to do with Ciaran killing Rosa? Jeremy was in Tunisia when they found-?"

"It's just a hunch, Alex- I'm only guessing," he growled. "But I'm thinking a bloke who feels guilty fer leaving his daughter when she got ill ain't the best shag on the market... And if Ciaran's as soft and eager to help Rosa as 'e's been makin' out, she didn't exactly have to push too hard, did she?" He glanced at her, frowning at her facial expression. "You follow?"

She was staring at him in disbelief, but he wasn't sure whether it was dawning understanding, or genuine worry for his state of mind; when she nodded and began asking questions, he breathed a sigh of relief. "You think Jeremy spoke about her?" She said, her forehead crinkled slightly in thought.

Gene ground his teeth, and Alex could tell he was fighting with the part of him that wanted to hate the father who walked out on his child, and the part that could finally begin to appreciate just how much personal emotion could impair a person's judgement. She watched as he nodded reluctantly, taking another drink and avoiding her gaze.

"I reckon he wasn't such a hard bastard, yeah," he conceded, finishing the whiskey off and topping it up yet again a few moments later. "An' I don't reckon she'd 'ave liked it much, either, havin' him harp on about it all the time..." he chewed on his lip, frowning when he saw her face fall slightly. "What?" He asked, worried. Alex blinked, glancing away and swallowing hard.

"Is that how you feel?" She asked after several moments, during which Gene had stared at her blankly. Now, he spluttered slightly, looking at her in utter disbelief.

"What'd you mean is that how I-?"

"When I talk about Molly," she said, feeling her own teeth pierce the flesh of her lip as she tried to fight back a rush of emotion. "Is that how you feel?"

Gene stared at her, blinking and gawping for several moments before he spoke again. "Bols, I'm just saying it'd-"

"Gene," Alex whispered, "answer the question."

He kept staring, but then a moment later he was around the other side of the desk, stopping a few centimetres away from her and looking down into her eyes, unsure whether to touch her or not. After a few pained seconds, seeing tears brim on the surface of her eyes, he wrapped her in his arms, pressing his lips to her forehead. "No, Bolly," he whispered, his voice full of promise and sincerity. "It ain't how I feel- maybe if yer husband was still around, or if you'd gotten back with him after the divorce... but I ain't bothered about Molly, Alex; she's just a piece of you I ain't got to know yet..."

He stroked her hair, attempting to keep the frown from his features as she sighed against him, relaxing into his chest and slipping both of her arms around his back, shaking her head in sadness, disbelief and confusion; she couldn't bring herself to tell him that he'd never get the chance to meet Molly.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly, drawing back slightly to look at him. "You were saying something before?" She looked at him imploringly, telling him to go on, but Gene looked hesitant; she sighed. "I'm fine," she assured him, though the certainty didn't quite reach her eyes. "I'm just being sentimental. What were you saying about Sophia?"

Gene ground his teeth in hesitance, and then nodded, realising that she didn't want to talk about it and slackening his tight hold on her slightly. "I just think..." He gulped, fingers tangling in her hair before he went on. "I mean, if it was me, an' I'd- if I'd left a kid 'cause of that, I'd have hated meself for it... I'd wanna talk about it, y'know? I wouldn't just keep it quiet... an' it'd worry her, right? With his Missus and Rosa still about, an' him spoutin' off about 'er left, right an' centre, she'd get her knickers in a knot, wouldn't she?" He glanced at her questioningly, to see if she was following, and found her to be nodding her head in understanding.

"Yes... But then it's a large leap to decide that Rosa's death came about because Sophia didn't like Jeremy being sentimentally attached to her; it's not exactly a logical assumption based on fact, is it? And all of Jeremy's friends said he never spoke about her..." Her eyes were clouded with thought, and Gene sighed, gently drawing her into his chest.

"Yeah," he conceded, "but they're blokes; I don't tell Ray everything I tell you..." He hesitated, and then murmured, "somethin' about birds, Bolly; we all end up spillin' our guts." He pressed a kiss to her forehead before towing her around the desk, settling into his chair and drawing her into his lap as he reached for the tape player. "Let's just- let's see what 'e says, 'ey?" He hesitated, glancing at her and seeing the trepidation on her face as his fingers stopped at the play button.

"You just want it over, don't yer?" He said, feeling his heart twist slightly in his chest. She turned to him, her arm around his shoulder as she nodded, teeth biting down on her lower lip.

"Yes," she admitted, not noticing the clench of his jaw, or the tightening of his hold around her waist as she said it. She rested her head on his and sighed, her breath teasing across the skin of his forehead, breezing through his hair. "I guess I just want to see it finished so we can all just forget about it..." She pressed her lips lightly to his temple, but Gene tensed, gulping slightly. Alex drew back, frowning. "Gene, is everything alright?"

He nodded slowly, his jaw tight as he muttered, "fine... I'm fine... Are you fine?" He glanced at her worriedly, finding her staring at him in blatant confusion.

"I'm fine, Gene..." She trailed off, noting the way he averted his eyes, watching as he nodded absently, his fingers still hesitating over the button of the tape player, though now they were clenched and white-knuckled.

She waited for him to say something for what felt like an age; when he didn't, she cupped his cheek, drawing his face round to look at her and searching his eyes concernedly. "Gene, please tell me what you're thinking," she implored, tracing her thumb across his lips. He leaned into her hand for a few moments, his mouth opening slightly as though about to say something, before he thought better of it, tugging her hand away from his cheek and instead holding it firmly in his, severing eye contact and reaching again for the tape player. Alex sighed, watching as he pressed down on the play button with more aggression than was strictly necessary, his knuckles cracking as he drew his hand away and clenched his fist on his thigh.

She thought she heard Ray's voice start to sound from the little black box, but just as quickly as Gene had started it, he shut it off, biting his nails in nervousness as she watched, his skin slightly pale in the dim light. Alex couldn't think what to do; her head spun with confusion, her hand squeezing reassuringly on his as he looked anywhere but at her.

"Gene, I really think you-"

"Tell me I'm being stupid, Alex," he said quietly. Alex stared, bewildered as he went on, his grip on her fingers tightening. "Tell me that once this is over thing's ain't gunna change." For the first time, he looked at her, his blue eyes searching and, to her surprise, fearful. She blinked, reaching out to stroke his cheek once more, fingers gentle and cool on his skin, even as her eyebrows creased in a slight frown. She spoke to him carefully, her voice soft.

"Gene, what are you talking about?" She murmured, running a hand through his hair. He closed his eyes at her touch, his breathing slowing slightly as he allowed her to draw him against her chest.

"Nothin'..." he muttered, shaking his head slightly, his nose brushing the warm skin of her neck as he did so; she shivered, and he couldn't help but smirk to himself before pressing his lips against her skin, gently easing the fabric of her top aside to kiss the soft, warm flesh that rested above the gentle beating of her heart. "Bein' stupid," he told her, removing his mouth from the soft skin and instead placing his ear against her chest, her pulse loud and reassuring as he breathed deeply. "Just being a twonk," he said, closing his eyes again.

Alex glanced down at him, biting her lip hesitantly as her hand traced continually through his hair and down his neck. "Tell me," she whispered, dropping a kiss to the top of his head. "Please?"

She could feel his trepidation, feel the tension in his spine, the uncertainty as his hand slipped to her waist and his long fingers dug tightly into her skin. She was certain he heard her heartbeat treble, certain he was one hundred percent aware of her worry as she looked down at him, but it took him several moments to speak, and he didn't move away from her when he finally did so, as though he couldn't manage it. "If the case is over, Bols, what 'appen's to us?" His voice was quiet and nervous, showing all too plainly that he wasn't used to addressing this type of issue, that he didn't want to... "You gunna realize yer don't need me anymore? Figure nobody's gunna get yer now so yer can slope back to yer flat and forget we ever 'appened?" It came out more spiteful than he intended, and he expected her to pull away from him as he heard the acidity in his tone, the cruel and bitter resentment that he wholly expected her to slap him for...

To his surprise, she laughed at him, causing him to jerk his head back up to look her in the eye. Her hand found his cheek, stroking it dotingly as she smiled down at his startled expression. Gene stared at her, trying to work out what exactly she was laughing at; he failed, and his eyes narrowed, jaw gritting slightly. Alex shook her head, still grinning as her spare hand ran over his shoulders. "You think I'm with you because I'm scared?" She said, evidently amused. He ground his teeth slightly harder, saying nothing. Sighing, she pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth. "Gene, how long have you been thinking about this?"

He shrugged, glancing away. "Dunno..." Liar, he thought. Eventually, he decided to tell her, conceding with a reluctant sigh before speaking. "Since we brought Merlot in..." He said, then frowned. "Well... after 'is interview, anyway..." His confession surprised Alex, and she blinked.

"Why?" She asked, evidently confused. Gene tapped his fingers impatiently on the arm of the chair, his jaw tight as he spoke.

"Guess I'd never expected us to find who did it," he admitted after a few long moments, avoiding her eyes in fear of what he might find in their depths. "Hadn't really thought about it before just... when he said 'e'd done it, an' we'd basically got our man I-" he hesitated, and when he spoke again his voice was softer. "I didn't know 'ow long you'd stick around after it was over... we only got together 'cause he topped 'er an' yer got worried... Couldn't 'elp thinkin' maybe you'd- y'know..." he gulped, and then went on, "I didn't know if you'd stick around when he was off the streets..." He bit on his nails for several long moments, and then glanced at her face; it was, for some insane reason, a slight comfort to see her looking upset, and he slid his arm tenderly around her waist, drawing her into his lap and pressing a kiss to her neck. "Don't wanna lose you..." he told her softly.

Alex rested against him, feeling all strength leave her body as the realisation of the depth of his worry crashed around her. The absurdity of the statement at first hearing seemed to fade as she considered everything; after all, she'd wanted him for months before the case began, but it was only after weeks of his comfort and protection that they finally relented and gave into their feelings.... Would they have gotten their act together without the insistent presence of worry and fear that had driven them together in the first place? Maybe, she thought, her arm slipping around his shoulders as his lips brushed up the column of her neck, but she couldn't be sure... Until she'd broken down on him all those months ago, she had been adamant that they could never be anything more than colleagues and friends; it was only once he'd taken her in his arms that she'd realized the depth of her dependence and feeling for him.

She wanted to tell herself it would have happened sooner or later, that it didn't matter how and why... But there was no way of knowing, and having got to know him so intimately, having learnt of his childhood and family life, she could see why the worry had suddenly chosen to surface, why he might be led to believe that the end of the case could represent the end of their relationship, but the thought itself caused her blood pressure to rocket, her breathing to sharpen in her lungs; she couldn't bear the thought of losing him, either.

She glanced down at him when he stopped kissing her, feeling his hesitance and instantly moving to trace the contours of his face with her delicate fingers, breaking out of her reverie and speaking in a tender, warm voice that she hoped was reassuring.

"You won't lose me," she assured him, tilting up his chin to meet his gaze. His eyes shone bright, clouded with emotion that he wasn't sure he could ever voice aloud, but that he knew she had to understand....

"You needed me, Bols," he murmured, kissing her knuckles lightly before he returned his eyes to her face. "An' I was there... 'cause that was where I was meant to be..." he gulped, chewing on his lip as he added, in a voice that cracked and splintered in his throat, "what 'appen's when yer don't need me anymore, Alex?"

Alex felt tears prick at her eyes, shaking her head as she rested her forehead against his and stroked down his cheek with her hand. "I'll always need you, Gene," she swore to him. "Not just because a girl was killed, not just because I'm scared, and not just because a killers on the loose... I need you, because you're everything to me now." She kissed his lips lightly, moving to his ear and pressing her mouth to the lobe, breath whispering over his skin. He held her close, his breathing unsteady as she carried on, her words warming and reassuring as his eyes closed to the sound of her voice.

"Everything," she promised him, sucking lightly on the flesh beneath his ear. "I need you," she murmured, "because without you I'm lost..."

Gene's arms tightened on her back, his face burying in her neck as he bit back a sigh of relief. "Alex..." he breathed, kissing along her collarbone and up her neck as she slipped a hand down to stroke across his shoulder blades. "Tell me..." he said, voice hoarse. "Tell me what you need..." Despite the fact that his hand slid beneath her blouse, teasing across the skin of her lower back as he pressed kisses into her throat and chin, Alex heard the burning need for emotional assurance in his voice, and knew exactly what he meant.

"This..." she whispered, guiding his mouth to the sensitive flesh at the base of her neck as she spoke. "You... making me safe... holding me..." her breathing hitched as he nibbled across her skin, his breath hot on her flesh, teeth gently grazing and teasing over the surface, followed by his tongue as it swiped gently across the marks he left in his wake.

"What else?" He asked, kissing the corner of her mouth before moving to her ear, nipping and sucking as she trembled in his arms.

"Your touch," she murmured, stroking his hair, her head lolling back slightly as his mouth continued to pay homage to her skin. "Your smell..." Gene murmured something incoherent in response, but she didn't ask him for anything further as she went on. "Your taste... your smile... your-"

"You don't need them, Alex," he growled. "You like them..." he bit down on her neck, listening to the sharp intake of breath. "Tell me what you need..." His voice was commanding, but soft and gentle at the same time; if she hadn't been sat down, her legs would have buckled.

Alex moaned slightly, cupping his cheeks and drawing his face back to meet his eyes. They sparkled and glittered, but underneath it all was his vulnerability; her heart constricted in her chest as she spoke to him again. "I need you to love me, Gene," she said quietly, stroking across his temple and down his cheek. "I need all that that entails... without it, I'm not me anymore..." Her heart raced, her hands trembling, but a moment later he'd drawn her down to his level, capturing her mouth with his and kissing her with desperate need.

"I do..." he told her, drawing away for the briefest of moments before nibbling on her lower lip. "I do..." Her tongue slid against his and he groaned, feeling her fingers thread into his hair and grasp at his skull as she whimpered, pulling him closer. "Need you, too," he whispered, sucking at her lip as she moved in his lap, her knees on either side of his hips now as she rocked against his body. He grunted, unthinkingly reaching for her jeans and slipping the button free, sliding down the zipper and pushing two fingers beneath the elastic of her knickers and into her body.

She gasped, pressing down on his fingers and rolling her hips against him, even as her words negated her actions. "Gene..." she whispered, "Gene, we should do some work, we shouldn't-"

"Not just yet," he said as he shook his head, brushing his fingers against her clit as he met her eyes. "We had sex here," he groaned, pumping his fingers deeper, "that first day... d'you remember, Alex?"

She bit down on her lip, nodding as her body began to tremble. "Yes... I remember... I-"

"Did yer need me then, Bolly?" He growled, tugging her closer and nibbling at her neck. "Tell me... did you?"

She was practically on the brink of orgasm, shaking with desire and lust as she nodded her head, her eyes closed as he stroked her once, twice, three times... "Yes..." she gasped. "Yes... always... always needed you, always-" She broke off as he pushed her over the edge, her body quivering with pleasure as she collapsed forward onto his chest, biting on his shoulder to stop from crying out, her breathing irregular and harsh, sweat beading on her brow as she absently traced her hand down his chest and towards his jeans...

He grabbed her hand, tugging it to his chest and shaking his head as he pressed a kiss to her wrist, never once breaking eye contact. "No," he murmured, his voice hoarse. "Gotta do some work..."

Alex nodded, eyes reluctant, but she sank gratefully onto his chest, attempting to regulate her breathing.

"So yer won't leave?" He asked after a few moments, stroking her cheek with shaking fingers, his eyes still uncertain. She smiled breathlessly, leaning forward to kiss him once again.

"Gene, I couldn't leave – you know that. Just because we started because of this case doesn't mean we have to end with it," she caught his lips again, briefly, before speaking once more. "I don't want it to end... ever..." She could feel him gulp, but ignored it as she went on, "I'll always need you," she whispered. "Desperately... and that isn't going to change..."

Gene nodded, stroking down her face and neck and across her collarbone with slender fingers. "Good..." he managed eventually. "Don't want it to end either." He kissed her lightly, feeling her shiver sensually against him and almost convincing himself to have her right there; but there was a nagging insistence at the back of his mind, and he knew he couldn't... And besides, he told himself as he shifted her from his lap, if she wasn't leaving, there'd be plenty of time for shagging each other senseless once they'd figured the case out once and for all... the thought was reassuring, and he held her slightly tighter.

"Love you," she whispered, and he knew it was more of a promise than a declaration; he met her eyes and nodded, tongue peeking out to wet his lips.

"Yeah," he murmured softly, "I know..." He drew her closer, lips locking together for a few moments before he breathed quietly, "same 'ere."

----

Once Alex had righted her clothes and settled back onto the arm of his chair, Gene reached for the tape player with reluctance, hesitating above the buttons for a brief second, but pressing down the moment he felt her fingers on the back of his neck, rubbing gently and reassuringly so that his body relaxed slightly. The button clicked, the tape whirred, and Ray's voice sounded, loud and clear within the office as Alex shifted closer to Gene, her leg draped across his, his hand resting lightly on her calf muscle, rubbing at her in silent reassurance. She managed a shaky smile, twining her fingers in the fuzzy growth of hair at the back of his neck. With an equally unsteady smile, he reached across her, taking her spare hand in his, and pressing a small, tender kiss to it as Ray's disembodied voice filled the room.

----

For the best part of fifteen minutes, it was what they'd heard before – Ciaran loved her, was obsessed with her, would do anything for her and it was all to prove a point, to show her how special she was... Gene's hold on Alex had tightened as once again he found an echo in Ciaran's love for Rosa, and Alex slipped into his lap willingly, her arms wrapping around him without hesitation as it went on for what felt like forever, her smell wrapping around him and causing him to sigh with relief...

But then it happened – the horrific, gruesome confession that Gene had hoped deep down never to hear, of just how Rosa McKellen's life ended.

As Ciaran spoke, and as they listened to him, his voice cracking and splintering with grief and self-loathing, Gene fought back vomit.

Alex couldn't stop herself, and threw up in the bin.

--

Hope it was ok!

Big thanks to Feline yet again for her wonderful beta-ing!

As ever, let me know what you thought :-)

Mage of the Heart