Cassie and Azazeal were planning to return home soon, so Cassie took these last few days alone together as an opportunity to really watch him. She'd noticed that when she knew what his goal was in interacting with a human, what he did looked a lot less like pure manipulation. She began to ask him to get people to done one thing or another (good or bad), so that she could observe how it was done. If he noticed this new fascination of hers he didn't say thing. She began to realize just how ingrained his smoothness and charisma was and now she was interested in determining how he was using it with her. Of course, she felt kind of like a fool for all of sudden assuming that this man who she knew loved her and she had two children with was manipulating her. But because of their history and his recent "announcement," she really felt that she needed to answer this question for herself.
One day when she had a few moments to herself, she thought back on when she'd met him and he'd seduced her and saw some of his actions in a new light. Up until the night they conceived Malachi, she was pretty sure he was probably manipulating her. But when she thought of what he'd done after that, she wondered, for the first time, why he had not possessed her again or forced her in some other way to have the baby and to take care of him. He'd bothered her a bit and played on her feelings for him…but he didn't push her like she knew now that he could have. In fact, after he'd snatched Malachi from her womb, he'd essentially left her alone, and it was she that went to him, several times, when Thelma found where he was keeping Malachi. And then to top it all off, when she stayed with him he'd chosen not to use Malachi to start the end of days which was clearly his only intent at the beginning. Hm, she was going to have to re-think her position on these events.
Of course all these fears had left her without thought when she'd saved him from the then horrible Lucifer. He'd been more open then for quite some time. And they'd been very happy and loving and they'd had another child and then…Why had that feeling left them?
Well, she still wasn't happy with herself for making him think that he shouldn't be himself around her and use his powers. But then again she'd never really told him that or tried to give him that impression on purpose. Besides, she'd spent all her time working with angels some of whom simply couldn't be anything but supernatural. But maybe this desire that he'd had to act normal had something to do with all this.
She wanted to talk this out with Elizabeth, but she'd be home soon, so she decided not to call her.
Elizabeth woke up one morning and found Lucifer sitting on the corner of the bed waiting for her to wake up. Unexpectedly, he seemed pleased with himself but still a little confused.
"Where have you been?" she asked, letting her voice show how much she'd missed him.
He was surprised by this question, "You told me to take responsibility for my actions and learn self-control."
She smiled, "And did you?" she asked, not sure where this was going.
"I think so," he said with a face like a child who's just learned a life lesson but hasn't fully digested it yet.
Her smiled widened and she crawled across the bed to hug him, relieved that he was home.
"I'm sorry. I was only thinking of myself," he said, but she only hugged him harder, not wanted to talk about it now.
Part of her did want to ask him what horrible thing it was that he had done and what exactly he'd been doing for the last several days that had brought him to this revelation, but it really didn't matter. He'd come back to her and for now that made her so happy she just wanted to be near him. But she told herself that she'd have to deal with this sooner or later.
Azazeal did, of course, notice that Cassie was boldly asking him to do things she would have never considered before. He was secretly concerned and knew she was watching him but saw no real reason not to do as she asked and it didn't seem to be making her think less of him. He was however feeling the urge to get her attention more focused her feelings for him rather than his actions, but the last time he'd felt this that strongly, he'd slept with Jo to make her jealous.
"I want to do something just for you," he said both to his and her surprise as they walked together through a bizarre in India.
"Like what?" she asked.
"Well, now, if told you, it wouldn't be just for you would it?"
She thought about it for a few minutes but didn't come up with anything.
"You're not really trying, you know," he said when she looked at him in defeat.
"Yes, I am!" She exclaimed.
He stopped her and turned to look at her.
"No, you're not. I know there's a vivid imagination in there, use it," he said with a playful smile. She smiled back knowing that there were personal things she wanted, like all people, that would fit the bill, but saying them out loud was not possible.
He wanted to tell her that it would make him happy to hear some small secret thing that she wanted and be able to give it to her, but he didn't. He wanted to coax something out of her, not in a forceful way, but just to get her to trust him with something like that, but he didn't. In a way, though, he was shocked that he'd asked her in the first place. They'd mostly avoided acknowledging the fact that he could give her anything she wanted and part of him thought the only reason they were doing this trip was because Elizabeth and Lucifer had done it first. He certainly didn't want to mess this up but he had to do something to get her attention.
It took a few days for Elizabeth to become comfortable around him because she was worried that something would go wrong again. But eventually she couldn't help herself and one night she found herself kissing him, hands clumsy in her efforts to him out of his clothes. He smiled and helped her. She was slightly embarrassed about how quickly she reached her climax, but the pleasure made her forget it quickly. He, however, was careful and she could tell he was holding back, despite the fact that he was desperately hard and struggling for control. Rather than asking him why, the foolish girl inside her decided to push him towards greater pleasure, to stroke her own ego more than anything else (No one's perfect!).
She knew his body too well for him to resist her and soon he moaned softly in her ear and gave in completely, letting his body express its delight in being with her. At the same time, his pent up feelings came at her strongly as he began to speak to her in angelic. He shook with each wave of emotion but instead of wearing themselves out, his feelings built up in intensity. Then finally to her surprise but his relief, he practically shouted that she was his Goddess, the angelic version of the Hebrew word Shekhinah (of course the angelic word had no gender). Having said the word, it drove him to further levels of ecstasy and worship than she'd ever felt as he continued repeat it. She felt surrounded by him, lifted up, and filled with power, as she cried out in pleasure and held on to him tightly. He blissfully exhausted himself in his rapture and eventually they both lost consciousness.
Elizabeth had been watching him sleep, amazed that even now, after all he'd been through with her, he never hid his feelings from her and he was always ready to let her know just how much he loved her. But she wondered how much of that had to do with his lack of self-control. When he awoke her expression changed to one of concern.
It took him a moment to realize what she was worried about, but when he did he only smiled and said, "It's alright. Don't worry."
"Is this why you were holding out on me?"
He just smiled.
"You shouldn't call me that. It's not right," she said becoming serious.
"It's not wrong," he said with unexpected stubbornness.
"I don't like it," she said trying to get the feeling of it out of her head so that she could be more persuasive, even though she knew very well how pleasurable it had been.
"Think of it as an honorary title."
"No"
"Well," he said stretching his body languidly and half-closing his eyes as he was still in the afterglow of the experience, "I guess you'll have to punish me then, because, I'm going to do it again," the familiarly bold Lucifer coming through.
"We talked about this. I won't take any more responsibility for you."
"Let me say it, Elizabeth. It doesn't mean what you think it does," he said reaching out to touch her and then pulling himself closer to her. Looking at her adoringly he said, "I would be your slave whenever you would desire, my love, but I will also always be what you and Luke need and if that means being free then I will obey you in that too," and then playfully, "I can be either one or both, depending on how you look at it."
"I don't understand."
"I told you, I did what you commanded. I learned self-control and decided for myself, so I could come back to you," he said with heartfelt earnestness, "Those things that you've forbidden won't happen either. But I will still need to be reminded how to behave on everything in-between," he said giving her a suggestive grin. "Aren't you impressed?"
She smiled at him, beginning to figure it out. The fact that he felt he had done this for her explained why he had been so excited, he always came back to her in a blaze of sexual fire when he had done something for her, and why he had felt the need to tell her about his new depth of feeling for her. She felt so…honored, in a way, that he had chosen to do what it took to stay with her rather than abandon her to indulge in evil or push her until she stopped him altogether. On the other hand, and with him there was always another hand, she thought to herself how typical it was that he'd only dealt with the two extremes because that's all she'd asked him to do. He wouldn't press her to make him her slave but he wouldn't be extremely evil either. But she also thought that this arraignment might be perfect for both of them.
"I sent you away, so you did what I wanted in order to come back to me?" She said, noting that he had used the words 'commanded' and 'forbidden', which normally weren't part of his vocabulary.
"Of course."
"How is this possible?"
"I don't know. But I knew as soon as you said those things that I was going to obey you and that's when I knew you'd become…"
"Okay," she interrupted not wanting him to say it, "but why would you risk angering Him by calling me that?"
"Because it feels amazing, doesn't it?" he said, sensuously.
"Is that all you think about?" she replied.
"He doesn't care," he said more seriously, "If He did He would have stopped this a long time ago. And that's not why you were threatened."
She paused to consider this for a while. Then she smiled at him but responded in mock haughtiness, "And where was all this before? Now I feel like I've been overworked and underappreciated."
"I guess I'm going to have to make it up to you, somehow. Do you have any ideas?" he rumbled.
"I'll think about it," she said still playing the princess and she turned to get out of bed.
He reached out and pulled her back as she laughed, trying to get away from him but she couldn't. When she finally gave in, he began lazily caressing her body, and she relaxed completely.
"When is your birthday?" he said after a few minutes, "You never told me, it must be coming up soon, unless you let us miss it."
"December," she said, which had always been her standard answer to this question her whole life.
"What day?" he asked, still more interested in her body than the answer to his question.
"The 25th."
At this he stopped, considered it, and then laughed heartily.
"You're serious?"
"Me and Jesus, baby." she said, laughing now herself.
"That's wonderfully perfect, don't you think?"
But she just buried her face in his chest to hide. He pulled her away and kissed her to distract her from her embarrassment.
"It's not like you to be embarrassed," he said, but she just shrugged and he couldn't get any more information out of her on this subject.