Azazeal had decided what he wanted to do to get Cassie's attention and hoped it would lead to the resolution of all this tension between them. It seemed perfect, but on closer inspection it also seemed ridiculous. Yet deep down, he thought it would at least mean something to her so it was worthwhile for that reason alone.
Cassie had also made a decision.
"You manipulated me to have a child, right?" She asked suddenly one night when they had just gotten into bed. Azazeal looked unprepared for this but that was exactly what she wanted.
"You mean Malachi?"
"Yes," she said and continued to look at him for his answer.
"Yes, I did manipulate you. Would you have had a child with me otherwise?" he asked trying to keep the conversation light.
"No," she responded simply, "And when did you stop?"
His brow furrowed for a second.
"I don't know the exact moment. When I took him I had intended to leave you alone, but when you sought me out…I really did want you to stay with us…I can't deny that I coaxed you along a little at least until you saved Malachi from Ella."
"But you loved me? When did that happen?" she asked less challengingly.
He made an amused face and said, "That's my secret."
She wanted to know everything in detail but realized that she would not want to be cross-examined about when she fell in love with him, so she let it go.
Azazeal spoke before she could ask her next question and his manner had changed to a more sincere one, "Please understand that once I loved you it was important to me that you love me on your own. You would not mean what you do to me if you were under my spell. That at least should make sense." And he seemed to really want her to believe this.
She considered this and said, "It does, but I still feel like I don't understand you, like there is something you are keeping from me."
He looked down for a moment and looked back up at her with a sad smile, but he did not answer her.
Azazeal often caught Cassie watching him now and despite the fact that he couldn't actually read minds, he knew that she had come to the correction conclusion that the key to understanding him was in his past. She would often ask gentle questions about it and he did his best to answer her fully, but there was too much there to be uncovered by a few questions. Azazeal felt that he should take the time to describe to her in words what had made him who he was: his nature as an angel, his fall, how his heart had been battered because of his innocence, how he'd turned bitter, how he'd been twisted, how he'd been trying to let all that go for her…
But it seemed to great a task for him to undertake, not because he didn't want her to know, but because it would draw out the pain of revealing all these things to her. She would understand it better, he knew, but if he waited until he was capable of it, she may not be there any more.
He therefore decided that he would do what Lucifer had undoubtedly done with Elizabeth and show her. The best place for this was, of course, in an angelic trance, which Cassie would be familiar with so she should be able to process the information.
So during a particularly sensual night together, Azazeal moved himself towards the edge of the ecstasy that he knew well, but rather than simply professing love for her, he tried to use the feeling to pry open the doors to his soul. He was successful but only long enough for her to gasp and for him to feel her desperately want to comfort him. His sensitive feelings were too overcome by her reaction to allow her to examine him further and he distracted himself by giving in to the familiar urge to tell her of his love for her in angelic. He did not speak of it the next day but knew that she was digesting this information and would come to him soon for an explanation.
She however had no intention of asking him about this. She had seen enough to understand what she needed to: that his capacity for love and feeling was actually beyond her own and whatever he had experienced had obviously wounded him deeply. She wanted to carefully coax him into revealing these things to her and since they would have forever, she would have plenty of time. After all the injury she used to feel that she'd received from him, it felt strange that she'd ended up wanting to comfort him, but she was beginning to understand that nothing was simple with angels. She should have realized a long time ago that there was more to him than met the eye, but she was caught up in the lies and her own strong feelings for him.
After a few days, Azazeal was quite discouraged by her lack of response, but did not let that stop him from moving forward with his plan.
After a normal day in their hectic lives, Cassie and Azazeal relaxed together and talked of nothing of any real importance. At one point, they ended up sitting on the couch turned towards each other in a way where their legs touched at the knees and kept them from being close to one another. Azazeal slid towards her on the couch, letting one knee touch the ground so that he was closer to her, as they continued to talk. Then at a break in the conversation, without announcement or ceremony, he looked down and reached out a closed hand. Once it was over her lap, he slowly opened it to reveal what he held in the palm of his hand. Cassie let out a barely audible gasp but did not speak. Azazeal was still looking at what he held in his hand rather than at Cassie when he started to speak.
"I know that this may seem simple, but I thought that it was something that you would understand…something that you wouldn't mistake for…for arrogance and manipulation."
At this he raised his eyes to her and saw her looking at him with an expression of love that he hadn't let himself hope for. He was too happy to be offended that for the moment she was actually ignoring the two beautiful gold rings he was holding in his hand. He had had these crafted especially for them and had felt that at least these would be a start in letting her know how much he wanted her to be with him forever.
"You know what these mean in human terms," he said, "And I ask only that you consider spending my kind of forever by my side as well."
She grabbed him and held him tightly and there was nothing more that needed to be said. He didn't know that what he'd already tried to show her had been enough to convince her of his sincerity. She already knew she would stay with him forever and make her own effort to truly know him, she just hadn't told him yet. Now, it meant so much to her that he would offer himself and immortality to her in this way, not really knowing if what he'd revealed to her had made any difference, that she had no words.
They didn't actually have a real ceremony or anything, although Azazeal wouldn't have minded, but Cassie didn't feel it was necessary. Perhaps that was because all of the angels acknowledged this new bond between them with a particularly bright smile immediately upon seeing them. She was not surprised but allowed it to amuse her that there were some things, no matter how subtle, that just couldn't be kept from them.
A few days later Elizabeth arrived with Lucifer and Luke for one of their regular visits. Elizabeth went over Cassie and Azazeal right away and saw the rings first. She smiled broadly and admired them, as she told them how beautiful and fitting this symbol of their love was. Cassie, of course, knowing that Elizabeth would recognize this as a resolution to the fears she'd expressed to her about Azazeal's motivations. Elizabeth felt a stab of jealously, but then laughed at herself and thought that Cassie deserved her envy. Part of her hoped that Cassie realized that this was something that Elizabeth would never have. This was too simple and pure for Lucifer to ever have thought of. But his extravagance in all things was part of his charm, she reminded herself, and she'd never been good at handling Azazeal's kind of sweetness anyway.
"What are you two wearing?" Lucifer said immediately upon getting close enough to see them.
"They're rings." Cassie answered, already preparing herself for a fight with him. Some how she'd already suspected that he would ridicule them.
"Yes, I am familiar with the concept, but what ever for?" he said condescendingly.
"Lucifer," Elizabeth said, shaking her head at him, but Cassie answered him.
"They are a symbol of our love and our commitment to each other."
"They're ludicrous is what they are," he announced firmly.
"Well," Elizabeth said with perfect pleasantness but steel underneath, "It's a good thing we don't care what you think."
He made a face in annoyance but didn't respond.
"I think they're lovely and I can appreciate their significance," Elizabeth added and she hugged them both.
When they had left, Azazeal laughed to himself and Cassie said, irritated, "What part of that was funny?"
"Don't be angry," he started, with a smile, "He wasn't making a comment about our relationship. He knows better than anyone else what we mean to each other and that's actually why he's so bothered by this. It's just," and he laughed again, "He helped create this world, you know, so to him these are just random pieces of debris. He'll never understand." This idea amused Azazeal so much that it infected Cassie and she began to laugh at this too. She hugged him and was grateful for how easily he'd turned her anger to happiness.
When they got home, as if on cue, Lucifer asked, "Should I wear a ring for you?" in a low voice.
She turned to him and said, "Of course not, silly." But she knew where this was going.
"Why not?" he asked, seeming disappointed.
"A moment ago the idea was ludicrous, remember?"
"But not to you?" he said.
"It wouldn't change anything, would it?" she said.
"I only want please you," he said in a now familiar submissive tone.
"You do," she smiled at him and began to kiss him.
Elizabeth had now discovered a new side of him that had appeared since he had done whatever it was that he'd done to deal with his warring sides. As promised, Lucifer did not cross the line when it came to the things she told him never to do. He also, and she carefully tested this out…just to be thorough, was capable of becoming exactly the slave he had described, but could also be the man she loved so much when she called him back. She thought that this would actually be quite convenient at times because it was the only time he was completely calm and peaceful.
The upside to all this was that he didn't get restless enough to cause big problems. The downside, if you could call it that, was that he would now periodically exhibit an obsession with pleasing her far beyond his normal desire. It was mostly adorable, but could be disconcerting at times, because he could get very agitated. At first, she was afraid that he thought he had to please her enough for her to stay with him because he had failed her twice, but she eventually saw it as all part of a new game they were adding to their repertoire. It was apparently an outlet for his redirected energies and she found that though he appeared to be suffering in his longing have her direct him this was not the case. The passion behind the offer was a key part of the display. So, she played along with him and the next time, when she had found him trembling worshipfully at her feet in his desperation, she had reminded herself that he had once told her that it was impossible for her to ask too much of him before giving him something to do for her. Besides, she figured that she could handle the blushes that he now tended to cause her if it meant that she didn't have to worry about him doing something she could never forgive him for.
And so while he was capable of showering her with love, affection, desire, power, submission, money, or anything else you could think of, he could never really do for her those simple human things that we would all recognize.