VIII.

When I rose that night it was already a while after sunset. At least that part of being new was true to form. I was a heavy 'sleeper'. The start of an aurora was evident in the sky. I'd seen the aurora borealis the first night I'd been in Banff. It was quite beautiful. It would be nice to see another one. After thinking about whether to go into town or not, I decided not to chance it. Instead, I went to an internet café in Edmonton that was the partner of the one in Banff. Niall was less likely to find me in Edmonton, which was a little less than three hundred kilometers to the northeast. There was a picture of the Edmonton café on a brochure for the café chain I'd picked up. I used it to help envision where I was going. I created a bit of a stir when I landed on the help desk, but I was blond and curvaceous and I just smiled a lot, so they could hardly complain. I didn't even have to glamour anyone.

I had intended to write to Jason, Pam and Claudine but first, almost as an automatic reflex, I checked my email. The Were in Oklahoma, Jerome, had written back to me stating that sure, he had heard from Liesel and while it was great that she had been a Were and all, he really wanted me to be the one pursuing the issue, rather than Liesel. He knew of me by reputation, trusted me and would talk to me more easily. Then it turned out he knew Alcide. I didn't know what to say. I mulled over how to respond while I went on looking at the Inbox. Next I opened an incredibly obnoxious email from Pam, filled with bad language, outrage, boldfaced fonts and her love? Not fondness? Although I'd come to the café with every intention of writing goodbye emails, Pam's email gave me pause. How much had it cost her to say that she loved me? I was sorely tempted to reply and to agree to meet her someplace. Something about reading her email buoyed me. I looked back at how I'd felt at dawn and shook my head. Was it really as bad as I felt it was? I suddenly realized that I missed home. Even if I was trying not to think about Eric, I missed him. It seemed like a very contradictory realization. I was afraid of him, but I missed him? Could I really leave this earth without seeing Eric again? Why was I even thinking about leaving? I'd stayed for him. Even if I was mad at him, what was I thinking? It didn't make sense. Missing Pam was less complicated. Pam really was my sister now in a vampire sense. But she had felt like one for years. She had tried to understand. Tried to stop him. The three of us had never been apart for this long in the past eight years. Yes, I truly missed her. And… Eric. I was so confused about Eric, so angry at him. Was I angry or afraid? I couldn't figure it out.

Unexpectedly, as I read Pam's email for a third time, a vampire by the name of Chad appeared and told me that the Sheriff of the southern region in Alberta wanted to speak with me immediately. There was this weird edge to his voice. I logged out of my email account and gave him a thorough going over. Shit! I thought to myself. I read Chad's mostly empty mind and saw that some King of Louisiana had been talking to the Sheriff and that I was wanted in the US. Well, I was clearly done in Alberta, and if Eric knew I had been in Canada, in all likelihood I was done in Canada. Thank you to Niall. Kudos for giving me the space and time to figure out my problems. But if the Sheriff thought I would willingly go to his compound with Chad, they were all very sadly mistaken. Eric knew I was too smart for something like that. I looked at Chad and said,

"I'm sorry to leave you in the lurch, Chad. Maybe you should try to get away with telling him you just couldn't find me, because really, you can't…" and I popped to the Aztec Nights, west wall.

I really should have held onto my True Blood because, with only a half a bottle on the night, I was lightheaded when I arrived. It could really take it out of you. It was only 8:45 pm, still the evening shift, and I guessed that I should go to the bar and get a few bottles because frankly, even I was willing to admit I was starved after popping from Banff to Edmonton to Vegas. It was awful that the stuff tasted like sewage, but at least if you had a good four to six bottles it could keep you functioning. I popped down and left the casino and took the elevator to the lobby bar like a regular person. Adriana was tending bar and she greeted me warmly. She was a Venice-born vampire bartender and she seemed delighted to see that I had been turned. I'd always liked her. She was very jovial and I loved her accent. I ordered two bottles of O negative warm and she served them promptly. I didn't even see her notifying Roberto but I read her thoughts on it. Right through the register, which had a central messaging system. She had messaged Jules, following Roberto's general instructions to all staff, issued only a short time ago. Crap. I decided to just hold my ground. Roberto had at least been nice to me, and he had said that Liesel would be back. Liesel I could deal with, and maybe talk to, for a while. I didn't think that Liesel would stand for anything happening to me. Imagine my surprise when instead of Roberto or Liesel, the person who put a sizzling hand gently on my shoulder was Pam.

"I could just kill you Sookie Stackhouse," she said with a mordant tone. "Good thing you're already dead. Do you have any idea how worried I've been? You did not reply as requested."

I looked at her cautiously. "I got… interrupted. I was going to reply and offer to meet you but had… an interruption. Does he know I'm here?"

"Who?"

"You know who I mean, Pam. Does Eric know? He isn't here is he?" I found myself rapidly scanning for his thought signature or presence.

"No Sookie, he isn't here. He's still back in New Orleans. He is gripped with the depression stemming from the realization of what a complete idiot he was."

I looked at her and probed carefully. She had not told him she was with me. Yet.

"Will you tell him I'm here?" I asked cautiously.

"No, I won't," she said. Meanwhile, I read that she wouldn't have to because Roberto was probably already telling him..

"I have to leave," I said, draining the second bottle and starting to rise.

She reached out and took my hand very lightly. I tried not to pull away.

"Don't run, Sookie. It kills me when I feel how you feel. Because you know I still feel you. I know how you've been thinking. And I just can't leave you alone when you're thinking that way. We can take as long as you want to sort things out, but don't leave me behind. If you go, I'll go with you. If anything happened to you I couldn't bear it. Don't make me say it again. You know what I mean."

I looked at her and swallowed hard, looking away. She really meant it. Sure she'd been sent by Eric, but what she was saying was heartfelt. She meant it enough to put herself out there for me to see, which for Pam was not an easy thing. My eyes filled with tears. She really was my lifeline, that slender thread keeping me going. And she knew it. She was my proof that you could not just be happy, but vibrantly so, in this form. Pam was emotionally guarded but I had to say that she seemed to enjoy being vampire more than anyone I'd ever met. And ironically I knew her enjoyment was in large measure because Eric had been her sire. She'd told me as much months before. She put her arm around me very lightly and kissed my temple. I winced, but she made a soothing sound.

"Shhhhhhh. Please Sookie," she whispered, her face pressed against my hair. "We have to find a way to make this work out. You have to promise me. Don't run, my friend."

She was such a good friend. Probably the best I'd ever had in my entire life. She always was there for me and she was never afraid to call it as she saw it.

Julian startled me. I didn't even hear him or feel him approach. Well that was a bad sign of how emotionally distracted I was.

"Sookie, Roberto sent me down with this. And Liesel says hi," said Julian. He looked at Pam and then at me and he seemed very puzzled. He handed me an envelope and nodded to me then looked away as if he was trying to preserve my privacy. "She would like you to call her."

I accepted the envelope from him, nodding but not looking up at him since I was basically crying. I just nodded looking away from him and down at the bar.

"Thanks, Jules. Tell Liesel I said hi back. I don't have my phone so I can't call right now."

After he departed, I cautiously opened the envelope and found a handwritten letter and a keycard.

Sookie,

I really don't know exactly where you were but I have heard you were in Banff. I have also heard that the Sheriff in southern Alberta is now on your tail for Eric, so you shouldn't go back there. I don't know what has happened between you and Eric, but I do know that you appear to need some time. Please accept accommodations at the Bellagio, as a neutral place to regroup. Your room number is 1025. You can work any days you wish this month. No rush. I'll continue to cover the cost of the room as long as you need it. Just try to rest, to relax. If you want to talk, Liesel and I will be happy to have your company.

Please remember that no matter where you find yourself, you will always have friends in us.

With warmest regards,

Roberto

Another tear ran down my face and Pam tried to soothe me. I tried not to recoil at her touch. She growled at Adriana when she came over to see if everything was okay. I thought about what a very bad vampire I made. I had always been a crier and being dead had not improved things in the least. Wow, what a powerful and superior vampire I was turning out to be, I thought sarcastically to myself. Doing justice to Eric and Pam's tutelage…

Pam read Roberto's letter. "Sookie, let's take him up on it and go to the Bellagio. We can go to the room and just relax and watch movies and spend time together. Why not give it a try? To just rest. I want you to just relax for a while. To just spend time together. But you need more blood first. You are so pale and wan."

She stroked my cheek delicately and I turned to her. I nodded my agreement. I had been so worn down by my depression and I felt so much better just being with her. She ordered four bottles of True Blood O negative and put the total on her own credit card. When we were done, she took my hand very gingerly and we went upstairs to a room she had in the hotel to gather some of her things and clothes and toiletries she'd brought for me. Then we left the Aztec Nights, and walked up the road to the Bellagio. It was a nice long walk and the evening air was cool. Even though it was still early, we went up to the room and she ordered another two bottles of True Blood for me, and ordered a pay per view movie on TV. We lay in the bed in front of the TV, watching the movie Underworld: Vampire Revolution and waiting for room service. We didn't talk. She just held my hand gently. The only comment she made the rest of the night, shaking her head, was "Silly goose of a girl running away from me… And I've been learning so many lawyer jokes just for you."