The silence was dead eerie at night. Like something that came from a defined horror movie. The clock made a beeping noise every time the hour had changed into a new one. I lost track somewhere after the third beep. Time was starting to be mixed up with sound in this room, in this world. My head felt dizzy, to dizzy. I remembered the times I'd go whether it was storming out or I'd had a bad dream, I would gather myself enough courage to run from my room straight to my parent's room.
One thing for sure was that the trial started in five hours exactly. The light was nearing in the sky, but it was still so dark and the rain hadn't let up. The branches hit against the glass of my window pain and yeah sure, it scared me, but was I going to run to anyone? Even if I had the option, even when things were what mom and dad considered normal around here, I didn't! I lifted myself up off my pillows, my arms felt like a jello substance. I didn't feel awake in all honesty. I could feel the sharp bags under my red eyes and they were raw from tears.
I didn't know if my body could produce or suck enough energy into my face for any kind of emotion or a movement even. All I felt like doing was playing with a hot iron of blade of some sort. Deciding against it, I moved from the bed and sucked in sharp breaths of air as my feet were uncomfortable, heels having left their mark. My arms were in a lot of pain, more so hardcore this time. The blood was smeared on my light pillows case and I threw my fleece aside so it would be spared. How I managed the twenty minutes of sleep on my own without the drugs the doctor gave me was beyond me.
Mom was confusing so much that it hurt me to think about it. I shivered as my newly night attire I'd got accustomed to wearing chilled my skin to the point of overrated Goosebumps. I'd tried calling Rowan once, but the call on his phone sheet I found in Mom's study downstairs was a dead end. It was odd that Rowan would be going to a place as the academy Luke and I attended. It wasn't that I didn't think he belonged there; I was more than ever grateful to attach him to me just to get through everyday there.
I knew he thought he didn't fit there. He hated it, but from what he told, I his brother wanted the best for him.
Cooked up money with special business. I think I knew what it meant, but I didn't wanna press the obvious issue. He tries to hide things, but he's never going to be a very good liar. I tried to tell him I didn't care what he thought his lifestyle was, but he was too stubborn to listen. Even his file on Mom's laptop with student records held no personal information or an address of use. I'd go to him as sure as anything would right now, if I knew where I could find him.
I took slow footsteps to my closed door and pulled it open to a gush of cool air. I shivered before stepping out silently. I left the door open for quick escape back inside. I was headed to the main bathroom, but something kept drawing me to the door on the left of Luker's room. His door was wide open and I could hear the soft sound of his breathing. I smiled in at him as I made my way, taking my time to push Brendan's door open. I squinted my eyes at the hinges creaked. An involuntary squeak came from me as his scent immediately filled my nose. I turned the tableside lamp on and walked my way in carefully. I was shaking now and part of me wondered why, part of me was holding back. Digging my hands into one another and my bare legs so bad, keeping myself as to not break any and everything in this room. The thought of why did he get off so easily? How could he do this came? But then so did my heart, right into my throat and my face surprised me by twisted into a frown and my lips started to quiver, my teeth shattering along with them.
It wouldn't hurt seeing what he had around here. Curiosity and the panic of my real feelings made me open the draw and place myself on the bed. I looked to the algebra book and the picture of Luke and Brendan standing next to one another a little crooked next to it. Luke was here. Wait, how can that not be an obvious thing? He wonders… He has a heart and he hates it just like me. Well, maybe not as bad. With age comes stronger emotions for newer heights. I opened the draw and found a few spirals and pushing things around I found a hockey magazine, but when my fingers came into contact with something of leather and dusted material I immediately pulled it out.
What I saw made my eyes freeze with time, with the cool air. I didn't blink as they watered, my eyes flooded and my vision grew blurry. The cover was duty, but I didn't think this would even be here. Why would he still have this? And in a top draw? The cover had a decal on the front. To Brendan: Carpe Diem, With Love Kassia. It was the scrapbook I'd made for him when I was fourteen and he thirteen after just making the junior hockey team's major league. It was filled with notes and poems, awards and things I gathered for him. Hand made by me. And in the back were a few photographs. Brendan and I at the piano together, me hitting dad in the leg with a hockey stick.
And as I flipped the pages absentmindedly, tears cleared the dust. The last page made me sniff in sharp air. The picture was a recent one. It was when Brendan had broken the neighbor's window. The memory was four months, but as clear as the air was in my silence.
"When I get sighed I'm gonna by you and Mom a new house."
"By yourself a new face while you're at it." I mocked, sticking my tongue out.
Dad spoke with a slight amused and half-odd tone. "What's wrong with this house?"
"Brendan is living in it father." I spoke as Dad smiled at me. Brendan raised his hockey stick as Dad raised the camera. The glass shattered in a far off distance and Brendan's face was priceless.
"Oh shit." Dad said. I busted out laughing.
"Well look at that B, you have just broken another hardship of these Boston suburbs."
"Pose for us Kass while Brendan gets mom and fast." He motioned Brendan while turning the camera at me. I flipped my middle finger up into the air. "Oh that's not very nice. Gimme something more." Dad spoke, with raised brows.
"I'll go all Marti Gras. No dad do Footloose." I joked. The camera shook as he stuck his leg out.
Just like that, the memory was stored back into my mind. Dad had taken a picture, but caught it at a bad time. Video loaded wise and Brendan must have put this copy in the book. I slammed it shut and threw it to the floor. How the fuck could, he be the way he was? This remorse is too much for me. I was quick on my feet and out of the room. I let the glass of water slip and did the same back into my room. I decided on a movie and I turned the slight volume of the TV on, popped in Bed of Roses, and sat back as the tears started up. I liked feeling fictional emotions. Crying over a movie not real, especially when Mary's character begged Christian's to tell her to stay. And when he did, I was so tight with the fleece.
There was full light beaming through my window and just as my eyes shut with a cluster of old, movies filling the TV the clock beeped. It was 8:30 AM and I had an hour to be ready for the trial. Dad didn't argue with me as I stated my going yesterday in the mumblings of leaving the hospital. I don't think his conscience was so light anymore. I stretched my muscles and did the same as my morning shower time passed quickly. I threw on a thin black button down knit top with my best pair of black and gray striped slacks. By the time, my flats and makeup were on and done dad was at my door. "If you're going let's get a move on. The courthouse is at least a fifteen minute drive." His voice as dead as the unmoving bed or fits of Brendan's scent in his room.
~************************************~
The car ride was a short one, but the tension was to long. Dad's breathing was never so rough and it mixed in with the car's smooth sounding engine. He didn't even wait for me as he exited the car, straightening his tie in the process. He was trying to seem together and formal about this, but anyone could tell he looked full or darkness and rage about to snap and shatter slice anyone with the pieces that hit them. We walked with many stares and whispers into the courthouse and when Detective Wallis motioned my father inside with the lawyer, he made me wait on an uncomfortable cold wooden bench.
The sounds of heels clicking, papers and must, people staring as they would normally when walking by. Most of them whispered to one another, to bad the bitches weren't brave enough to say it aloud. I sat in silence until I heard feet slithering down the floor. In automatic response, my head lifted and my eyes caught that of a most flameful stranger. He stood tall somewhere in the 6-era code. His hair was colored to dark to be brown, a deep purple or either burgundy and he wore black jeans with a much slick chain down his tall gangly legs. His top half wore a plain simple white button up with a blue and green striped tie. He had bruises all over his face. Mostly his jaw, cheek and his forehead.
His neck had tattoos seeping all over it as well. A blue star and one that read a familiar, all too familiar for me. It was like a trance, the warm air and his musty scent flew, rushed at me. Locking my body to the hard wood. He was beautiful. In a most unique way. His eyes looked straight to me and he winked once. His head tilted a little to the side and I let my mouth curl up into almost a come here smirk and a mix of an innocent yet forceful smile. All too quickly, his eyes scanning every inch of me rushed him. "Come on you. I want this over with." Spoke the officer who was handling him. He was without a doubt someone who like Rowan caught my interest.
The sound of the door opening and Wallis stood at them sighing as my dad again looked unhappy and extremely dissatisfied. "Come on Kassia." he spoke so low and simple the tone scared me. I followed him and when I'd taken my seat the judge has started talking when I looked to the left and spotted that unique stranger. What? No, not him it can't be. That's Brendan's killer. But he's so young he's… I sank into my chair, as he looked straight at my dad, flipping his tie and pointed two fingers in the shape of a gun. But when he looked to me, his finger made a quick circle and with the other hand, he stuck his pointer finger through the circle and smirked. I let out a harsh breath of air.
"Mr. Hume you're giving evidence that Mr. Darley here attacked your son before your eyes and caused his death?"
Darley where have I heard that name before? Darley, Darley and then just as I turned I saw his familiar statue perched on a wooden chair behind the man's. I gasped in shock and his eyes locked with mine at that point. I quickly turned away. Oh, god no is this Rowan's brother. Is this why he lied? What's going on? Why is this happening? It's fucking much I can't take it I can't take.
As the stranger winked into my father's uncold rage filled eyes. The judge began speaking firmly. "Mr. Hume, Mr. Hume?"
He looked straight to her. "No your honor, I am not!" What? What is he doing?
I started to speak. The lawyer jumped up adding in his two senses. "It was dark and there were a lot of them. I can't be sure anymore…" He trailed off. The stranger's eyes were written with extreme shock. The judge rambled on and I quickly pulled myself from the chair and stood motionless sin the isle way as Dad grabbed my arm and Rowan looked to me with pleading eyes. Dad's bore like a hailstorm into Rowan's as he pulled me out.
"Mr. Darley you're free to go a bailiff will return to you into the holding cell and you can retrieve your personal belongings."
We walked so fast and my mind was racing as were the tears running viciously down my face. We got into the car in silence before Dad hollered at me. "Get out! Now!" He ordered.
"Dad what is going on? What is wrong with you? Why did you do that you were so sure it was him I-"
"I'm not sure Kassia I don't know what to fucking do right now and at this point I need you to keep your god damned mouth shut!" he yelled, slamming his hand on the car wheel. It made me jump. But he looked up suddenly as we heard the roar of two loud engines. The mustangs that were marked alike rolled right up as the man were walking with Rowan right by his side. Dad's hands clenched the wheel so tight. I was in silent tears. They were marked with some sort of tribal swirl and dad looked at them with wonder and curiosity gleaming. They scattered first from the black glossy ford and next from the red one. A man jumped up onto the hood of the car as they all chanted. "Joey…"
So the guy that I knew killed my brother was named Joe Darley. And Rowan knew these people. But as a man that resembled Rowan, rich chocolate skin, gorgeous statue and dressed in all black and leather.
He grabbed the guy's face between his hands, that's when the driver's side door opened, and with the swirl of the car door, a brown leather trench coat whirled out from his tall form. He wore boots and jeans. He had a goatee and I could see the sun bounce the blue in his eyes. His shirt tight black. He whiffed up his collar and pulled a cigarette from his firm lips. He blew the smoke out and I was frozen, not with fear, but with wonder as my Dad. We watched him and could hear his voice.
He slapped his hand to Joe's shoulder and Joe spoke. "I did pretty fuckin' good huh?"
"I'm proud of ya. Who's your man now?" The man spoke. The way he moved, I couldn't take my eyes off. I paralyzed with anxious energy bolts and I could taste the fear he gave off right here. "I am." Joe spoke.
"Get in the car." He stated.
I got out quickly. "T-take a bus home and be careful Kassia." He spoke.
They made a U-turn in the road so fast my head spun. And as I ducked out of sight. My heart froze and leapt into my chest. Hidden around the short street corner I saw the one driving the black glossy car turn his head toward me and for a second I almost lost all willable air. I could see somewhere Rowan's sympathetic eyes. But what caught me in horror as I started on down to the bustop was my Dad tailing the cars at a fair pace hidden enough behind.
Oh god no. He knows what he's doing now….
~**********************~
I didn't bother making notice my Dad had arrive home. My body was to unwilling to move. I think I was going into shock. I listened to motions and watched Luke go into the garage and saw my dad storm out. Mom followed in suite. Though when he made his way to Starfish turn and into a neighbor's driveway and parked I clamed down a bit. I'd decided he needed time and tried to let myself forget the detail of everything I saw earlier. Mom didn't bother questioning me and as it grew darker and I didn't bother, but setting and cleaning a few dishes avoiding the family video tapes I heard a door slam. I heard Mom's frantic voice and went straight for the living room.
"Nick honey what happened to your hand?"
I climb, I slip, I fallReaching for your handsBut I lay here all aloneSweating all your blood
"I uh, I cut it accidentally." And that's when I froze to my place like some invisible piano song came. My eyes were watering with fear. He'd gotten rid of me for a reason today and parking at a neighbors wad temporary. He lied…. And I choked inside myself as Mom went to get him bandages. "How you doin kid you ok?" he asked Luke. Then turned to me. "Kass?" I nodded and turned around. I made a line for the door and as I hit the deck, I heaved. I pressed myself against the wall. My air came out sharp. I slid to the ground with my tears howling. God what's he done? What has happened to him? What did he just set…? Into motion? My eyes widened with more tears. What is coming is making my gut turn and I know it can't be less than very hell upon this earth, coming straight to the Hume household!
If I could find out howTo make you listen nowBecause I'm starving for you hereWith my undying loveAnd I, I willBreathe for love tomorrowCause there's no hope for todayBreathe for love tomorrowCause maybe there's another wayI climb, I slip, I fallReaching for your handsBut I lay here all aloneSweating all your bloodIf I could find out howTo make you listen nowBecause I'm starving for you hereWith my undying loveAnd I, I willBreathe for love tomorrowCause there's no hope for todayBreathe for love tomorrowCause maybe there's another wayBreathe for love tomorrowCause there's no hope for todayBreathe for love tomorrowCause maybe there's another wayI climb, I slip, I fallInto your empty handsBut I lay here all aloneSweating all your blood
rate and review please. I DO NOT OWN THE SONG. IT'S BREATHE BY PARAMORE. AND THE DAMN TEXT WOULDN'T LET ME FIX THE ACTUAL TEXT LOL. SO SORRY.