Amber Memories, Forgotten

-As I beg for you to stay Away-

A/N: I got emo after this chapter, gah. Sorry. Please, do try "Goodbye My Lover" as the song for this chapter- I prefer the acoustic version though.

Hey Aki, have you ever considered that

If you have someone you love and she dies, do you stop saying that you have one?

Or are you always a lover, even when the other half of the pair is gone?

Would I still have you with me… always?

The door grunted opened as the servants jostled around him, attending to his needs and demands when the aristocrat stepped into the grand mansion. It was the sight of lavish and wealth again, the world of power and struggle to stay on top.

"Welcome back, my dear brother," greeted a man as he held his arms with generosity. "So how was the funeral?"

"Don't bother," muttered the younger man. Handling his top hat and cane over to a maid, he grumbled in annoyance as a warning for the man, Sheryl Camelot, to not bother him. The young aristocrat then dragged his feet to his study-room, before flopping himself on the arm chair. He inhaled the musky smell of the books in this room and sighed out loudly, as if hoping that would expel his emotions too. No, why was his heart experiencing all these pains yet again even though he was supposed to be fully awakened? What did it, really, took be a Noah?

A knock broke his peace and a head popped out of the crack. "Lord Mikk, there is a list of-"

Tyki Mikk grumbled and waved the butler off with an easy hand. "Leave that for tomorrow," he said, before resting his head onto his right hand, wishing for the exhaustion to sink in and away. The young man's thoughts began to wander off, as he sat on his luxurious chair, and replayed the events that had just happened.

She had finally given me her hand, but it was her heart that I had wanted.

He had gone in the morning, to the Amber mansion, to send his regards to the tragedy that had struck the family. As expected, the funeral had attracted plenty from the gentry, who all appeared in black and were mourning pretentiously for the one who had went off.

Except that it was not really an important figure.

It was obvious that these people who gathered on such a day were either determined to lick the Amber boots or just to join in the commotion. A controversial event was what they had called it and shook their head upon. They found it a waste too, for such an unimportant man like Charles should not be given such luxurious funeral. He was just a butler after all, a man who had toiled his life for the family and had now died of old age- or so it was said.

Then why even appear, mumbled Tyki bemusedly, finding human race a peculiar lot. He observed the pretentious group talking and consoling the Amber family- the Earl and his Countess daughter. Yet where was Kaeda? Tyki wondered silently, a frown hanging upon his handsome feature as he bustled through the crowd. He had not seen the latter since that day when she ran off without a word. It was not his place to question, and he knew too, that the young lady would not utter a word about it if she chose not to say it. However, he had come in respect to her too.

Then he spotted her, a thin figure clothed in black and grief as she attended to those who came. She set a contrast against the lively garden, he noted. Her smile was worn thin and weak, looking strong yet he knew that it was going to break any sooner. He knew her too well, knew how much she would paint everything, but she would persevere on- something he both loathed and loved about her.

That was what made it such a challenge, he thought silently, intending to cross the crowd to the young lady. He had caught her eyes- those hollow amber ones, but the latter had turned away immediately, as if he had been another knife brought near to her wounds. Did he burn her as much as she did upon him? Impossible, he laughed to himself, casting the ridiculous thought aside.

"Tyki, my son," boomed a voice behind him. "Thanks for coming here today."

Lord Mikk turned around and mustered a smile. It was her father; he noted and nodded his head. "I'm sorry about it, Earl Amber."

"Father, you mean," laughed the old man to what was appropriate in a funeral. "It's in a matter of time soon so you should start getting used to that term."

Tyki chuckled a little in response. This man was obviously unaffected, he realized, as his eyes followed the thin shadow that had began to retreat and move away from one and other groups of arrivals.

"It's quite overboard, really, to have such a lavish funeral for Charles," complained the old Earl as he took a puff from his fat tobacco stick. "However you know how good-hearted our Kaeda is, she will have no word from me. Only the best for Charles, she had said…"

The young aristocrat nodded his head halfheartedly and smiled a little, allowing the Earl to ramble on. It was not his concern how the latter had tried to prevent having such a grand event to send off their head butler- or just a butler, as the old Earl had said. He was not even interested about all this attraction and gossips this would bring the gentry to, cursed Tyki silently but nonetheless still maintaining a polite smile. As he watched, the young Amber lady had already begun to make her way back to the mansion. It disgusted even him, how pretentious the old man was about his daughter.

Just then, a firm pat on his arm sent the young man back to the present. The Earl chuckled. "I see that you're more interested in my daughter. Go on, comfort my sweet pie. She's all yours now."

Tyki Mikk smiled in response and said no more. Apologizing as he made his way through, he went into the mansion and asked for directions to where the young mistress had head to. The servants seemed a little awestruck by his appearance before guiding him politely to the young Amber's room. As the young man walked, the noise made from the crowd seemed to quiet down. A relief, Tyki thought, as he smiled and anticipated for Kaeda's reaction when she saw him.

Yet, it was when he was about to knock on the large door when he heard the slightest muffle of her crying. It sounded painful, raw even, as the young lady let out her inner most turmoil and feelings. She was gasping, heaving from pain. His heart, strangely, held a peculiar feeling to it when he heard it. It was nothing he had heard before, not even in their days spent together under those unpolluted night stars. Unconsciously worried, Tyki opened the door to a crack quietly and stood flabbergasted when he saw her.

Though the latter's back was facing him, it was heaving up and down from grief, violently and heartwrenching. The sun casted pale rays on her silhouette, making it seem as if the whole picture before his eyes would fade any moment from then.

He had not known at the time, but her hands were tightly wrapped around a wooden figurine, her tears making large plump stains on the mahogany carving. On the floor was a letter placed neglected by her feet, crumpled with anger and exasperation. It was yet another mission, and in it was a list for her to do away with. She had already set her heart and knew the best way to execute her plan. Yet why was it now that she would be so upset over it? The sight of the bird, the death of her father figure, she had brought this all on herself, damn it.

Tyki stood silently as he took in the sight of her defeated composure, the weakest by far. She had not even break down when she was badly injured, nor had she even shed a tear when he had caused her pain. So why was she this way now- was this what he had been missing as a human? Why was he even here in the first place? His legs were aching to walk to her, take her in his arms and absorb all her grief. Anything, anything really, to stop both their hurting.

Yet he knew better than to do that. Punching himself mentally, he was about to leave when he heard something. It was hardly audible, so soft that he would have assumed he was imagining things. His feet stopped instinctively.

"Wait," said the voice again, tired and exhausted, yet enough to pull him back. "Please."

Tyki Mikk waited in silence. It was Kaeda, he knew, who had caught him sneaking up on her. The young man willed himself again to accept any thrashing from the young lady and even began to think up of some joke or cold lines to shrug it off. However, all thoughts halted when he felt a small pressure on his back, pressing down his suit to his body on the back of his waist- it was her hands, small and curled into a fist by each other. Did she too, had the power of curling one's cold fist around another's heart?

"Please," mumbled the voice softly as the pressure on his back increased when she pressed her fist on. "Just lend me your back- just your back will do," pleaded the young lady as she rested her head on him too.

Tyki startled; unable to move. His heart thumped loudly against his chest, so much so that he feared Kaeda was able to hear it. Thoughts ran through his mind about what caused her to change so drastically, but he could reach to no conclusion. What came up were only images of a young lady called Aki resting against his back for comfort and support. Then the soft voice, he longed so much to hold on to, to seal his kiss with, spoke again, this time in a sterner tone. It was as if that was all that mattered.

"I accept it, Lord Tyki Mikk… I accept your proposal."

Have you ever wondered how it would feel like when someone is washed away by the other's tears?