A/N: First of all, I really do appreciate the responses that I'm getting to this story! Of course, I still feel like a loser in fanfic land because I haven't reached those triple digits yet even though I have like a million hits! So let's work on that, huh? *big grin*

I need to WARN YOU ALL! There are some lemon wedges at the end of this chapter (not B/E, unfortunately), but I swear, it's not too bad. So please just bear with me and I swear to God, you won't regret it! Also, because you guys seem to think Edward is a dick to Bella, you should enjoy this chapter! As promised, this chapter is longer than the others.

Since I took the time to make it longer just for y'all, do me a huge favor and leave a review! You guys are the best!

Chapter Eight: Oops

EPOV

Saturday Morning

I rolled over on the bed, groaning as I stretched. I wasn't sure how long I'd been asleep, but it didn't feel nearly long enough. It had been a long week, filled mostly with the incessant irritating chatter of the curly haired bitch that was I was positive I'd have to fuck soon, just to get her to leave me the hell alone. Everywhere I turned, she was there. In fact, the only reprieve was lunch. Though I had initially scoffed at the thought of joining Godzilla and the gang, that stupid lunch table had become my safe haven. While I was there, surrounded by the giant, the pixie, the emo, the bitch and the mouse, I was safe.

I pushed myself up on an elbow, rubbing a hand over my tired face, squinting against the bright sunlight that filtered in through the curtains.

Wait a minute… Sunlight?

Throwing the covers from my body, I practically rolled off the mattress and stumbled sleepily to the window. Huh. So the sun does shine in Forks. Well, color me fucking surprised. I ran a hand through my hair as I glanced down at the street. Parked in front of the house was that monstrous red truck that I would recognize anywhere.

I backed away from the window, grabbing my discarded shirt from the foot of the bed before I pulled it over my bare chest. I didn't bother with making the bed; Ruby never came into the room anyway and as far as I was concerned, what she didn't know wouldn't hurt her.

I made sure to close the door behind me before I made my way downstairs, surprised as hell that Ruby let me sleep as late as I did.

"Well there you are!" The old woman greeted cheerfully as I stumbled into the kitchen. "I was beginning to think you were never going to wake up."

"Yeah, it was nice to be able to sleep in for once," I mumbled, glaring at her pointedly, but she ignored me.

"Anyway," she chattered on, "Bella has been kind enough to agree to run an errand for me up in Port Angeles, and I didn't know if you'd be interested in going with her."

"What's in Port Angeles?"

"It's a touristy kind of town," Bella said, averting her eyes. "They have a mall though. Nothing spectacular, but it serves the purpose."

"Yeah, I guess I could go," I said with a shrug. Granted, malls weren't exactly my cup of tea. In my experience, the only people that hung out at malls were pre-pubescent kids and potheads. But it would be better than sitting alone with Ruby all day. "Do I have time to grab a shower?"

"Sure," she said, nodding, still not looking at me. "Take your time. I'm in no hurry."

I grabbed a bagel from the bag on the counter and hurried up the stairs, eating as I went.

----

I wasn't exactly sure what the weather was like outside, but judging by the lightweight sweater that the mouse was wearing, I was pretty sure I'd be okay with a t-shirt and jeans. I showered, shaved and dressed quickly, but again, didn't bother with my hair.

I grabbed a lightweight jacket from my closet before I headed downstairs, actually looking forward to getting out of this small ass town, even if it was just for a few hours.

"You ready?" I asked as I entered the kitchen, grabbing another bagel from the counter.

"Uh… yeah," she responded with a nod, giving Ruby a slight smile. "Yeah. We can go. Are you ready?"

I rolled my eyes, but bit back my smart remark. "Yes, I'm ready."

"We shouldn't be back too late, Miss Ruby."

"You all go on and have a good time. Just be careful!"

With a wave to Ruby, I headed out of the kitchen and into the foyer, pausing only to make sure I had my wallet and cell phone, with Bella right behind me.

"I almost forgot what the sun looked like," I mumbled as I pulled the door open and stepped out onto the porch.

"Days like this are pretty rare," she said quietly. "But it just makes us appreciate the sun that much more."

Right. Whatever, I thought. "Exactly how far away is Port Angeles."

"About an hour each way, give or take."

"Are you sure this piece of shit can handle it?" I asked, pulling the rusty door of her truck open.

"At least I have a vehicle."

Touché. I could feel myself grinning. "So you do have a personality hidden in there somewhere. Way to go," I congratulated, slightly impressed that she had it in her to fire back at me. Though her face had to be blazing as it turned a deep shade of pink, she held her head a little higher as she crossed the front of the truck before climbing in.

"You should probably put your seatbelt on," she mumbled, averting her eyes again.

"Are you kidding me?"

"Do I look like I'm kidding? Come on. My dad's Chief of Police. His law-abiding ways were bound to rub off eventually," she said as she reached over her shoulder and pulled her own seatbelt across her lap.

I grumbled to myself, but I followed her lead and strapped my own seatbelt across my chest, sending her a pointed glare. "Happy?"

"Very. Thank you," she said, giving me a slight smile as she put the truck in first. I rolled my eyes. No wonder she got along so well with Ruby. They were two fucking peas in a pod.

"So what exactly do normal people do around this piece of shit town on the weekends?"

"We leave town."

"There's seriously nothing to do in town? Like, within walking distance of Ruby's house?"

"Rosalie and Jasper throw parties sometimes. They're actually having one next Friday for Halloween."

"Are their parties any good?"

"Oh yeah. They have this huge house, right outside of town, so you don't have to worry about neighbors calling the cops or anything. Alice usually helps throw it and Alice doesn't do a half-way job at anything she does."

"Huh. Maybe I'll have to check it out next weekend."

"You should. We usually like to get a scrabble group together during the parties. And sometimes, if Rosalie is feeling generous, she'll even let us break out the Twister mat."

I narrowed my eyes as I looked over at her. "What the fu—"

"I'm kidding," she laughed. "But seriously, even when nobody's throwing a party, we all usually get together and hang out. And you know, you don't have to wait for somebody to show up at Miss Ruby's and take pity on you. You've pretty much been inducted into our group anyway."

"Is that what you did today? Take pity on me?"

"I guess you could look at it that way," she responded with a shrug and just like that, I snapped.

"I don't need anyone to pity me," I snarled angrily. "Is that what the group did with you? Take pity on you, I mean? Because you sure as shit don't fit in with the pixie and the Barbie."

It was out of line. Even I, Edward Fucking Cullen, could tell that I'd definitely crossed the line, because as soon as the words left my mouth, her face fell, all traces of humor gone.

"I didn't… I didn't mean… I was just…kidding," she finished lamely.

Fuck. Fuck! "Shit. Bella, I didn't mean that. I'm just…"

"Just forget it, okay?" She asked, forcing a smile. I wanted to slam my head against the goddamned window. Shit.

BPOV

"Just forget it, okay?" I asked, forcing a smile, all the while fighting off the stupid unshed tears that prickled behind my eyelids.

From the first moment I'd laid eyes on Edward Cullen, I had wished and prayed that I could be more like Rosalie and Alice. Don't get me wrong; there were aspects of my life I wouldn't change for the world. But everything about him screamed confidence, bordering on arrogance and I just wished that I had even an ounce of Alice's charm or Rosalie's wit to put me on an even playing field with him. So that for just once, I, Isabella Marie Swan, could be the girl who gets the guy.

I had made up my mind, after inviting him to accompany me to Port Angeles, that I was going to just… let go. And once we were actually alone, I thought I'd gotten off to a good start.

It was much easier for me without an audience; without Emmett glaring pointedly at me for making nice with his cousin, and without Rosalie and Alice nudging me or kicking me when I laughed too loud at a joke that wasn't funny, or when I looked at him longer than they deemed necessary. It was easier for me to relax around him when I didn't have to worry about Jessica Stanley plotting my untimely death, or Mike Newton plotting Edward's.

But as easy as it was for me, it still wasn't good enough.

It was probably stupid to feel so hurt by his comment about not fitting in with Alice and Rosalie, but it didn't take the sting away. Mostly because he was right.

From the moment I'd realized I was surrounded by the freakishly beautiful, I wondered how the heck I'd managed to become associated with them. Simply put, they were perfect…Emmett and Jasper included.

"Bella… please. Would you just say it?"

Uh… what? Apparently, I wasn't capable of having an inner monologue and carrying on a conversation at the same time. "Say what?"

"Tell me I'm a dick."

I rolled my eyes. "Edward, please. You're not a… you're not, okay? Just forget it, really."

"Please? I really shouldn't have said that. I didn't mean to imply that they were any better than you or anything like that."

"It's fine. Really, I promise. Just drop it, please." I took a deep breath and smiled, hoping it would be received as genuine. He groaned and dropped his head back against the seat.

"Fine," he grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest. "But I really didn't mean it."

"It's okay, I swear. I'm not… mad or anything." I could feel him eyeing me, but I refused to look at him. I really just wanted to drop the subject and I was afraid that if I looked at him, I would crack. "Can we talk about something else now?"

"Like what?"

"Tell me about Chicago."

----

Though I'd spent a week's worth of lunches with Edward Cullen, I'd never heard him speak as much as I had on our way to Port Angeles. It had definitely taken a little prying on my part, but it wasn't long before he was telling me about the life he'd led back in Chicago.

He told me about the time, back when he was in second grade, that he'd fallen on stage during his school's Christmas concert and chipped his front tooth. He told me about the pet snake that he'd convinced his father he'd had to have when he was in middle school. I'd laughed when he admitted he was actually too scared of the snake to do anything other than watch it through the glass of the terrarium and had to give it away a month later.

He'd scowled at me for laughing at him, but the corners of his mouth had twitched, a smile threatening to form.

And even though the trip to Port Angeles had taken twenty minutes longer than originally anticipated, thanks to my senior citizen of a truck, I found that I didn't mind because he was with me.

"Is there anything in particular that you wanted to do?" I asked as I climbed out of the truck. "I've just got to pick up a book that Miss Ruby ordered from the bookstore."

"Hasn't she ever heard of Fed-Ex?" He asked with a snort as he slammed the passenger door of my old truck. "They got a movie theater in the mall?"

"Yep. They don't usually have too many movies playing at one time, but that Max Payne movie is playing, I think."

"Cool. Well maybe if we have time, we can catch that."

"Sure," I responded with a shrug. I wasn't really one for movies but it could be easily tolerated as long as he was there. Pathetic, I know.

EPOV

Later That Afternoon…

My first impression of Bella had not been a favorable one. In fact, my first few impressions had not been favorable and I was fairly sure that my interactions with her had been biased by my opinions of her. But now, sitting across from her in the nearly empty restaurant as she rambled on about her life in Phoenix, I realized I was wrong.

"I'm sorry," she laughed, dipping her French fry in ketchup, "I'm talking way too much. You should stop me when I start rambling, because I could seriously just go on forever."

"You're fine," I responded with a roll of my eyes. Even though I would never admit it to her or anyone else (especially because I really liked teasing her for rambling), I liked hearing her talk. Her voice was soothing, unlike Jessica's. "Tell me more about your mother," I prompted. "What does she look like?"

She laughed, brushing her brown hair out of her face. "Renee… well, she looks like me I guess," she said with a shrug. "She's taller and her hair is shorter, but we could definitely pass for sisters, rather than mother and daughter."

I tried to picture an older Bella, but I couldn't. The only version of her I could picture was the one right in front of me. "Do you get along with her?"

"Oh yeah," she responded with a nod. "She's my best friend. That was the hardest part about coming here; leaving her, I mean."

Must be fucking nice, I thought bitterly, but I tried not to let my angry feelings register on my face. It wasn't her fault that my mother was a slut who couldn't be bothered with a family. It took every bit of strength I had to push those thoughts from my mind. "Enough of this bullshit," I said, taking a drink of my soda.

"You're right," she agreed with a nod. "We should probably get ready to head out. We promised Miss Ruby we wouldn't be back late," she reminded me, to which I rolled my eyes, but I grabbed the remainder of my burger and shoved it into my mouth before I stood.

"Alright," I mumbled, my mouth full, "let's go."

She snickered, shaking her head at me. "That's disgusting."

"I bet Jessica Stanley wouldn't think so," I retorted.

"Yeah, well nobody said Jessica Stanley was the smartest cookie in the kitchen. But it's probably not her fault though. You probably just dazzle her with your ridiculous good looks."

I grinned at her, nudging her playfully as we made our way to the front counter to pay. "So you think I'm good looking, huh?" I asked modestly. Hah. As if I didn't know. Her face reddened at my teasing, but it wasn't long before she recovered.

"I think you think you're good looking."

"Ouch. That hurts. I think you've definitely just bruised my ego."

"Somehow, I think your ego is large enough to survive."

----

Later That Night…

Bella Swan was definitely different, I decided as I flopped back against the mattress with a sigh. She was probably one of the nicest goddamned people I'd ever met (which wasn't saying much because I usually associated with high school sluts) and she was just easy to get along with.

I think the thing I liked the most about her was that she wasn't afraid to be herself. She didn't try to conform to the crowd in an effort to fit in. She did her own thing, everyone else be damned and that shit was rare. Especially in teenagers. Especially in female teenagers.

Being around her was like a breath of fresh air, especially after being surrounded by people like Carlisle (who was the goddamned epitome of phony) and the Jessica Stanleys of my Chicago high school.

Don't get me wrong; I was positive that Jessica was going to make an exquisite fuck. Bitches like her always did. But that didn't mean that she still wasn't phony as shit. She tried so hard to give off that air of innocence, but it was laughable. That girl was probably so loose that I'd have to strap a fucking two-by-four to my back to keep from falling in.

I could feel my cell phone buzzing in my pocket, so I lifted my hips and pulled it out, glancing at the front screen. Damn. That bitch must have ESP or something, I thought as Jessica's name flashed across the screen.

"Hey Jess," I greeted smoothly. "I was just laying here thinking about you."

"Oh yeah?" She asked, in what I guessed was meant to be a seductive voice. "What exactly were you thinking?"

"Mmm… you probably don't want to know," I smirked.

"Sure I do," she purred. "I was actually just thinking about you too."

"You were, huh?"

"Of course. Lately, you're all that seems to be on my mind."

"Huh. Why don't you tell me about it?" I coaxed.

"Well," she hesitated, "I was actually wondering when I was going to be able to get you alone. You seem to be avoiding me lately," she said and I could hear the pout in her voice.

"Aw Jess, I haven't bee avoiding you." Maybe I was the biggest phony of all. "I've just been really busy."

"You promise?"

"Of course, baby. But I'm curious," I said.

"About what?" She asked, slightly breathless.

"Well… you said you were wondering when you were going to be able to get me alone…" I trailed off, grinning.

"Uh-huh."

"I'm curious as to what you'd do to me once we were alone."

A soft squeak emitted from her end of the phone. "Are you sure you want to know?"

"Positive." I leaned back against the headboard, my grin widening.

"Well first," she said quietly, and I could hear shuffling in the background, so I assumed she was getting comfortable, "I really want to run my fingers through your hair."

"Oh yeah? You don't have to wait until we're alone to do that though."

"No, I guess we don't. But I wouldn't stop there. I'd probably take your shirt off so I could touch your chest."

"I think I'd probably like that."

"I'd trail my fingers down your chest to your stomach, stopping just above your pants."

I could feel myself getting hard as she described the way she'd touch me. "How come you'd stop?"

"Because I'd want to take my time. I'd want to savor it."

I shivered slightly. "Do you think you'd enjoy what you saw?"

"I'm positive I would," she said confidently. "In fact, I'd enjoy it so much, I'd have to kiss every inch of you."

"Every inch of me?"

"Well," she paused and I could hear the smile in her voice. "Almost every inch."

"And what would you do with the rest of me?"

"Not yet," she said quietly. "You're getting ahead of yourself."

"Mmm… tell me," I commanded.

"I think after I kissed my way down your body, I'd have to go back up."

"Why would you do that?"

"Because I would want to kiss your lips. Softly at first, but as my hand tangled in your hair, and my other hand found your waistband, I would imagine it would become a little more urgent."

My growing erection was straining against my jeans. "What else?"

"I was thinking that I'd probably be able to feel you getting hard," she responded in a breathy voice.

"Fuck yes," I growled. "What. Else?"

"You would get frustrated by my lack of progress on your pants, so you'd just go ahead and undo them yourself."

Cradling my phone between my ear and shoulder, I reached down and did just that, groaning as my rock hard cock was freed from the confines of my jeans. "Now what?"

"I would want to have a little taste of you before I did anything else. But I wouldn't finish you off with my mouth. That would be such a waste."

I sucked in a breath, my dick aching with need. "Fuck Jessica," I grunted. "You have no fucking idea how bad I wish you were here. You're killing me."

"I want to hear you pleasure yourself."

Not needing to be told twice, I kicked the jeans from my legs and scrambled into the bathroom, nearly dropping the phone on my way. Once I was safely in my private bathroom with the door locked, I pressed the button to initiate the speaker phone. "Can you hear me Jess?"

"Perfectly."

I closed my eyes as I yanked my boxers down off my hips and gripped my cock with my hand. I moaned at the feeling, leaning my head against the wall. "Tell me what you want to do to me," I commanded, my voice strained.

"Well, after I finished having a taste, I would probably push you back onto the bed. I'd climb over your hips and straddle you, kissing your neck and chest, just teasing you."

"Uh huh," I grunted. "What else?"

"You'd be anxious and probably a little uncomfortable too at all the teasing. You'd try to roll me over so that you could take charge, but I'd stop you and tell you to take your time. I'm in no hurry."

Her words rang out in my brain just as clear as anything, but her shrill voice was replaced with Bella's soothing voice.

"Take your time. I'm in no hurry," she's said earlier that morning at Ruby's kitchen table when I'd asked if I had time for a shower. Her face flashed in my mind, and I immediately opened my eyes, groaning. Though my cock had been throbbing to the point of pain just seconds ago, I could feel the need beginning to subside as I listened to Jessica describe the way she'd touch and kiss me as she mounted me.

It just didn't have the same goddamned effect; not now. She'd driven my body wild, eliciting reactions from me but now, whenever I fucking blinked, I could see Bella's disapproving face in my mind.

"That's disgusting," I'd remembered her saying, snickering as she shook her head at me. Though we had been talking about something completely different at the time, the words felt like a swift kick to the nuts and before I even realized it, my cock was limp in my hands.

Fuck, I thought bitterly.

"Edward?"

Shit. "Uh… y-yeah. Keep going, Jess."

"Are you sure you're okay? Maybe we shouldn't do… this."

"No, it's fine," I told her, trying to keep up the pretense. It wouldn't do good to hurt her feelings before I got the chance to actually fuck her.

Jesus Christ, I would never understand how women were able to fake that shit. It took every goddamned thing I had to remember to moan at the correct time or exhale shakily when the conversation called for it. But I couldn't very well give that shit up too soon because I didn't want the fucking reputation of a premature ejaculator.

I'm not sure if Jessica ever realized that my noises were just a little too forced or a little too loud to be entirely real, but if she did, she said nothing.

By the time I figured it was okay to fake the climax, she was panting heavily as if she'd just run a goddamned marathon or something and I wasn't sure, but I thought that maybe she'd gotten a little pleasure herself from the whole fucking experience.

"Jess," I croaked, making sure to keep my voice low and gritty, "there are no fucking words to describe how great that was."

"Do you think," she asked, her voice wavering, "that we could try that for real? Soon?"

And then I grinned, as if Christmas had come early. "Soon," I promised.

----

"Edward?"

I glanced up at the sound of my Ruby's voice as she pushed the door open. Her face was furrowed with concern as she scanned the room. "What?" I asked, slightly agitated that she was bugging me, but relieved that she hadn't decided to barge in fifteen minutes earlier.

"Is everything okay?"

I cocked an eyebrow at her. "Everything's fine. Why?"

"Well, I was doing some reading in my room and it sounded like you might have been getting sick. I could hear you in the bathroom."

My eyes widened and I was pretty sure that what little color I had drained from my face. No fucking way did she hear me pretending to whack off.

"I heard what sounded like moaning and heaving. Are you getting sick, sweetheart?"

"Oh. Oh that… uh… You know, earlier Bella and I stopped at this little diner in Port Angeles and I think the hamburger I had might have been bad."

"Should we call Carlisle?"

"Oh no," I told her with a shake of my head. "I uh… I feel much better now."

"Are you sure you don't want me to get you some ginger ale or something?"

"No, I'll be fine. Uh… thanks though."

"Alright sweetheart," she said with a nod as she crossed the room. She bent over the bed and kissed my forehead before she patted my hair. "Feel better, honey."

"Yeah, thanks," I repeated again, watching as she walked out, pulling the door closed behind her. Once I was sure that she was gone, a groan escaped my lips as I fell back against the bed. This definitely topped my list for one of the most embarrassing moments.

A/N: As much as I love Horny!Edward, I love reviews more. So dazzle me!