Chapter 2- Come home
Summary: No one seems to be able to reach her…until he comes home

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River stopped in between Kaylee and Mal's bunks and slid down the bulkhead. She curled up into a little ball and covered her ears with tears in her eyes. Wash cautiously crouched beside her.

"River? Can you hear me?"

She heard his voice from a distance, but the whispers blocked most of it out.

"River…come home…RIVER…COME HOME…" they were shouting now, loud and angry in her ears like explosions. One after another by her ears…bang…bang…bang…

"NO!" River shouted. "I'M NOT GOING!"

"You don't have to go anywhere," Wash said gently. He looked around. No Simon, no Kaylee, no anyone. He was practically alone.

"STOP SHOUTING! STOP! PLEASE!" she sobbed.

Inara came down the corridor quickly, observing the scene before her.

"I heard River. What's going on?" she asked Wash.

"I don't know. One second she's drawing and the next she's screaming her head off. I don't know what to-"

"NO!" her voice made them both jump.

"See if you can reach Simon. I'll try to calm her down," Inara offered.

Wash nodded and ran to the bridge. Inara leaned down.

"River, mei mei, it's alright."

She went to embrace her, but she pulled away. The shouting blocked out who it was.

"COME HOME."

"NO!" River sobbed.

"Shh, it's alright."

Wash kept trying to reach Simon, but he must have turned his radio off.

"Tamade yiqie gei diyu!" he cursed. He got up and went out to River and Inara. She wasn't able to calm her down.

"Simon?" Inara asked hopefully.

"Nothing."

"Try anyone. Nothing seems to be working."

"If we can't calm her down?"

"I know where Simon keeps the soothers."

Wash nodded sadly and returned to the bridge. After another ten minutes, Wash still couldn't raise anybody and Inara couldn't get River to relax at all.

"Well?" Inara asked.

"The same, nothing. I don't know why Mal and Zoe aren't-"

"We ain't what?" Zoe called from the kitchen.

"Biyou fo," Inara sighed.

"What's goin' on?" Zoe asked.

"COME HOME."

"NO! No…" River screamed.

"How long has this been goin' on?" Zoe asked as she stepped into the corridor.

"At least twenty minutes," Wash replied.

"You can't calm her down?" Wash and Inara shook their heads no.

Mal walked in. "What's the fuss about?"

"River," Wash explained.

Mal walked over to her and sank beside Inara. River was still curled up and clutching her ears.

"Simon?" he asked.

"Can't reach him," Wash responded. "We might have to get those soothers."

Inara nodded and got ready to get them, but Mal stopped her in her tracks.

"Hey there little one. What seems to be the trouble?" he asked gently.

She heard him through the shouting. She felt him there. "COME HOME."

"No! I'm not going!" she bellowed.

"That's all she's said," Wash commented.

"You don't have to go anywhere, sweetheart. Okay?" Mal said softly. He carefully took her wrists in his hands to ease her hands away from her ears. "It's okay."

The shouting subsided as he brought her arms down. He looked at her hands carefully. There was blood on them. He gave her a quick once over before discovering the blood on her ears. She must have been clinging to them a little too tightly.

"You need someone to examine those ears of yours. Let's go to the infirmary-"

"No! No needles…" she shook her head with tears in her eyes.

"Okay, okay. No infirmary. We'll just stay right here," Mal amended carefully. He looked over at Wash. "Try Simon again."

Wash left for the bridge. He looked over at Zoe and Inara.

"Can someone please get me a cloth or something to stop the gorram bleeding?"

Zoe left while Inara got back down beside them.

"Shi ni haoba?" she inquired.

River shook her head no. "I'm not going."

"Going where, mei mei?" she asked gently. She shook her head again with new tears forming in her eyes. Mal put a hand on her shoulder.

"You don't gotta talk 'bout it right now."

Zoe returned with some small bandages and a rag. He quickly wiped the blood off of her hands and inspected her ears. Her nails dug in pretty deeply. He very tenderly wiped the blood off and bandaged the cuts. He could tell that it hurt and he hated that he had to do it, but the doc wasn't around. There was no telling when he would be. Half of the things they needed were two towns away. They had to take the mule to get there.

"Let's get you to your room. I'm orderin' you to get some rest," he told her with a small smile.

She nodded tiredly. Her "moments" always drained her completely.

He took her fragile hands in his own. He helped her get back on her feet. She swayed a bit. The world around her seemed to spin. He steadied her by putting his arm across her shoulders and helped her down the corridor and down the steps. She tensed up when they passed the infirmary and then relaxed when she was safely in her room.

He got her situated on her bed and went to leave.

"Thank you," she muttered before she drifted off into a light sleep.

He got that warm feeling inside and silently left her room. He returned to the kitchen where Inara, Wash, and Zoe had gathered.

"How is she?" Zoe asked.

"Sleeping. What happened?"

"We were just sitting there one minute and then she started screaming. She ran out and kept saying the same things over and over again," Wash shrugged.

"'No' and 'I'm not going'," Inara nodded.

"Do we know what it's about?" Zoe asked.

"Beats me," Wash sighed.

"Maybe you said or did somethin' that upset her," Mal suggested.

"I don't think so. She was drawing a picture of me and I was asking her a question."

"About?"

"Dancing."

"Dancin'?" Zoe smirked.

"She's a dancer. I was just curious," he covered.

"Maybe it brought up memories," Inara offered.

"Maybe, but it wouldn't of made her dig into her own ears like that. Where the hell is Simon and Kaylee?" Mal asked angrily.

"I'll go try them again," Wash muttered. Zoe followed him onto the bridge.

Mal and Inara stayed there in an uncomfortable silence.

"I tried to calm her down for at least fifteen minutes. It took you maybe two or three…" Inara noted.

He looked at her blankly. "I'm gonna go see how they're comin' with findin' Simon."

She watched as he walked towards the bridge.

He didn't realize how quickly he had been able to pacify her until Inara pointed it out. Not that it mattered. Simon wasn't there, nothing was working, she's his crew, so he stepped in to help. Besides, he was never one for watching people he cared about suffer. So he cared about her. So it tore him up to see her like that. And so it felt all sorts of right to hold onto her like that. She was his crew. His crew was family. That's all it was…

They finally reached Simon. He rushed into River's room the second he got back.

"Mei mei," he said guiltily as he sat on the edge of her bed. He wasn't there for her again.

"I'm better now," she said sleepily. He examined her ears.

"How did this happen?"

"Shouting…so loud…" she explained.

"You did this?"

"Had to block them out."

"Do you need anything for the pain?"

"No. I need sleep."

"What happened?"

"It's irrelevant. My psychosis varies. Something must have triggered it."

"Just get some rest. I'm sorry I wasn't here."

"You had to get things for the ship. It's alright."

He hugged her as if she could break if he squeezed too hard. She hugged back, clinging to the comfort her brother could always provide.

Simon let her get back to sleeping. He joined everyone outside of the infirmary.

"She seems alright now. Whatever you all did, it worked…" Simon announced.

"More like what he did," Wash pointed to Mal.

"Thank you, Captain. She wouldn't say what triggered it, but I'm not sure if she even knows herself. Not that it matters. What you did has her back to some sort of stability."

"Well, let's get off of this rock. I don't have a need to hang around longer than we have to," Mal said.

Everyone disbursed to their different corners of the ship. Simon caught up with Mal.

"I can't thank you enough for what you did."

"She's crew," Mal shrugged it off.

Simon nodded with a typical Simon half-smile before going back towards the infirmary.

"She's crew," he repeated under his breath almost as if he had to convince himself that was the reason why. Maybe it was. It was the 'maybe it wasn't' part that tripped him up.

(Tamade yiqie gei diyu-Damnit all to hell

Biyou fo-Bless Buddha

Shi ni haoba- Are you alright?)