I'm nervous to release this chapter.

There's an appearance by someone whose name starts with an 'E'. And no, I don't mean Esme.

Enjoy.

Bella's POV

I hesitated before knocking on Jasper and Alice's wide, wooden door.

Their house was cozy and decorative and… comfortable.

I felt like I was in an actual home when I was there.

That's why whenever I had to step inside I was afraid I would disrupt the perfect structure.

I turned the knob slowly. It didn't open, though.

They never lock their door. Until now.

I knocked on the door lightly and hoped they weren't gone for a Sunday breakfast.

"Sorry, Rosalie," Jasper said opening the door with one hand and holding a newspaper in the other in front of his face.

"It's Bella," I said quietly.

Jasper shut the door for me and dropped his newspaper upon seeing my face.

"Bella," he said slowly, surprised.

"Hi." His eyes were wide and bright and angry.

"I thought you were… someone else." Jasper stared at me, as if he thought I was a hallucination and he was daring me to disappear.

"Who's Rosalie?" I asked. It was an exotic name and pretty and… "Oh no! Are you… seeing her? What about Alice?"

Jasper's lips twitched into a smile as he picked up the newspaper he had dropped. "Alice is still asleep. Rosalie's just a friend."

"Oh." I breathed slowly as I took another step inside their home. Nothing crumbled to the ground.

I looked to the floor embarrassed. I had just gotten here and I was already accusing Jasper of cheating.

Jasper was wearing goofy loafers and a flannel shirt with jeans – causal. Something you'd wear around your house on a lazy Sunday.

"Are you alright?" Jasper asked.

"I'm fine." My throat was dry and… aching? I wanted to be able to have a lazy Sunday in a home of my own.

"You seem… upset, different." He replied.

When I said nothing he asked, "Do you want something to eat?"

"No," I lied. I was starving, but I didn't come here for food – I came for help.

"Come on," Jasper said to me walking back upstairs. "Take a nap – you look exhausted. We'll talk when Alice wakes up."

Jasper led me upstairs and showed me to one of their guest rooms.

"Thanks," I mumbled.

"How long're you staying this time?"

"That's what I wanted to talk about…"

"Sure," Jasper said, "when Alice gets up we'll talk."

"Why?" I asked sitting down on the bed. I was suddenly very aware Jasper didn't want to talk to me without Alice present.

"You hurt her," Jasper confessed at the threshold between the bedroom and the hallway.

"I didn't mean to."

"I know," Jasper sighed. "We'll talk when she's up."

Jasper shut the door.

He shut me out.

He doesn't want to help. He's not going to want to.

I should just…

– No! I can't just leave.

That's what's hurting me, and everyone.

I had to fight with myself to get under the covers.

I couldn't sleep, though I wanted to.

My eyes didn't want to close.

I was afraid that if I closed them I'd dream about other places and then I'd want to leave.

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"Can I come in?" Alice's voice twinkled thru the door.

"Of course," I said meekly sitting up and shrugging out of the covers. I hadn't fallen asleep, of course.

I couldn't.

Alice inhaled sharply. "It's you."

"It's me," I replied standing up.

Alice's tiny body flung to mine in a matter of seconds and she was hugging me. "I was so worried about you!"

I felt my stomach plummet at the thought of causing someone pain. I wished dearly I could have answered, "Don't, Alice. I'm fine. I'll always be fine and come see you."

But, truthfully, I didn't know that. Maybe I'd never know.

So, instead, I hugged Alice a little tighter expressing my sorrow.

Jasper knocked a photo down as he entered the guest bedroom, alerting us to his presence.

Alice detached us, but kept her hand firmly on my wrist – holding me in place. Temporarily, at least.

"Do you know how long you're staying?" Alice asked pleading with her eyes.

"No," I said.

I heard Jasper's heavy sigh at this answer.

Inwardly, I was sighing just as damn heavy. I wish I could tell them. I wish I could tell them a definite plan for a day ahead, but I didn't know where I'd be in the next hour.

Let alone the next day, week, month, year…

I knew where I wanted to be.

"That's OK." Alice glared at Jasper.

"You can't do this to us," Jasper said. "Not again."

"I didn't mean to walk out," I said to Jasper.

"We know," Alice said for him.

"It doesn't change that you did, in-fact, walk out," Jasper said.

I was about to rebuttal, but it included the words "genes" and "cursed". I spared them the dramatics.

"I did, but I didn't mean to," I edited.

"That makes no sense," Jasper said.

"It doesn't have to," Alice said firmly and grasped my wrist a little tighter. "She's family, Jazz."

"Thank you," I told her. "I didn't mean to, honest."

"I know," Alice said. "And I don't take back the words I said before. But, I love you like a sister. Stay until you want to leave."

"Alice," Jasper said cursedly.

"Don't," Alice said knowing his next words somehow.

Jasper grumbled and looked back to me. "What are you doing here?"

"I… I need help," I said.

I saw Alice and Jasper exchange a heavy glance.

"Not drugs or anything," I said and I saw them relax. They don't have high expectations of me, but I can't blame them. My self expectations are undoubtedly low. "I want to know how you guys do this."

"Do what?" Alice asked.

I didn't want to have to admit it outright. It was humiliating.

But, they're normal. They don't have the problem that I do.

Not now, anyway.

"How do you…" I trailed off.

Alice gave my wrist a squeeze, silently telling me she wouldn't judge me about this.

"How do you stay in one place?" I asked.

Jasper let out a shaky laugh.

Alice didn't, though. She dropped my wrist, now knowing I wasn't about to just walk out and leave. Not voluntarily, anyway.

"I love Jasper," Alice said determined and confidently.

Jasper stood stock still and peaked at his wife through his hair where it was covering his eyes.

"I love you guys," I said. "But, I leave. Just like Renee did."

"You're not her," Alice said.

"You didn't even know her," I argued.

"Hey," Jasper said to me effectively cutting off the quarrel I had with Alice. "You're not a flake, Bella. Mom was. She didn't care, you do."

"How do you know that?" I pleaded. I sat down on the bed defeated.

"I was older than you when she left," Jasper said.

Alice placed a hand on my knee.

"You come back," she whispered to me. "Always."

I bit my lip, unsure of what to do or say next.

If I was to start a life here and it ended badly… Jasper and Alice would have to suffer the consequences.

I couldn't do that to them.

But, what other choice did I have? If I tried to start a new life somewhere else it would end the same way all my other conquests had.

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"Can you get that?" Alice asked when the doorbell rang.

"Sure," I called back to her.

I had spent the day unpacking my suitcases.

It was a start, at the very least.

I walked down the stairs case and swung the front door open only to be met with emerald green eyes that were shining at me.

No, really.

He was taller than me, almost an entire foot.

His hair was a mess and sloppy and almost as if he'd spent the whole day in bed.

Maybe he had.

The man was holding a box that I now realized looked quite heavy. He was rocking it up in his arms a little higher.

I felt rude and moved aside for him to enter.

I didn't say anything, though.

He looked at me in a smoldering manner and instantly I wanted to kick him.

Just because you're gorgeous doesn't mean you have to squash people with your eyes.

It was unfair, but, God, his eyes were like a world within themselves.

The man dropped the box in the foyer with a resounding thud that shook all of Alice's paintings on the wall.

And if Alice's artwork was in jeopardy, then Alice would be showing up to protect it and possibly hunt down the person responsible for the damage.

"Edward," Alice stated angrily holding her hands on her hips. "How many times do I have to tell you not to throw those damn books on the ground?"

He smiled cheekily at her, but his attempt at charming her didn't work.

She loves Jasper too much.

"Next time I go to your place," Alice said bitterly, "I'm banging on your piano!"

Edward's eyes were shooting bullets at her.

"You wouldn't," he said.

"Just try and stop me," Alice proclaimed.

That relaxed Edward a bit as he began to realize he could stop Alice if need be.

Alice rolled her eyes.

"This is Bella," she said indicating to me with her hand. "Bella this is Edward. Jasper's friend."

"It's nice to meet you," I said to him extending my hand for him.

He stared at my hand and chose to ignore it. "I'm actually Alice's cousin."

I took my hand back and stared down at it.

There was nothing on it – no food, blood, warts.

What the hell is this guy's problem?

"And I'm actually Jasper's sister," I said bitterly.

"I know," he replied. Stupid-know-it-all.

Alice exchanged a look with Edward before asking excitedly, "Do you want to stay for dinner?"

Say no. Just say no.

"I can't," Edward said. Thank God. "You mind if I go find Jasper?"

"Go ahead," I answered for Alice.

He stared at me for a moment too long.

And I wouldn't have minded if it was a nice, curious stare.

But, this stare. There are no words for the disgust he looked at me with.

"What was that?" I asked Alice after Edward left.

Alice danced back to the kitchen and I followed her because I wanted to know what caused her cousin to be so cold, and yet so undeniably hot.

"He's… going through a rough patch." Then she added, "Much like yourself."

It made me stop all of my other thoughts suddenly. I never wanted to turn out that… evil and impolite.

He could have at the very least said some pleasantries to me. And what the hell was with the handshake?

Am I that disgusting?

And Alice had to compare me to that… intolerable man.

Fine, I'd prove her wrong.

And Jasper, too.

I can be nice, courteous, respectful, reliable.

I won't be like that Edward.

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